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Old 08-25-2009, 04:43 PM   #1
nocturnal33
 
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Red face i did it

I've been a FA for quite honestly as long as I can remember. However, its literally been a secret of mine for nearly as long. Growing up I would always admire fully figured women, and fantasize about beautiful thin ones filling out. I'm 33 years old, I married a woman who is 5'10" and a one time model/college athlete. More than once she was told she cornered by total strangers that she was Ashley Judd. She is stunningly beautiful and even within the realm of the FA she garnders neck whipping second glances. I fell in love with her for her personality, and her heart. She truly is the most beautiful woman I've ever encountered in my life and her smile melts me even after 10 years of marriage. The way we have fallen hopelessly and completely in love with one another is to such an extent our friends get sick just looking at us for the horrendously loving sap that i am. However, being 5'10" her weight never eclipsed 130 pounds and of course the FA in me has always had to deal with that.
Secretly I always wished for her to let go a bit, not even drastically. 10 pounds, maybe even 15. I loved her and always will, so I opted not to bring it up, just endlessly lurk on sites like this as I have since high school.
Then she acquired a full time nursing position. Erratic schedule, always on the go, meals via drive through, sleeping whenever. Little by little it started to catch up. I'm steadfast in the belief that due to her elastic scrubs the weight she ever so slowly began to accumulate wasn't noticed until it became blatantly obvious that her typical Victoria secret sizes just weren't cutting it.
At her last physical she is now 160. Mind you not exactly the ideal around these parts, but for me a childhood fantasy coming true. Little by little over the past 2 years she is "literally" bottoming out. Still the slight arms, and the most pristine little neck hold her beautifully sculpted head and face but from the waist down it was more than obvious things were giving in to age and lifestyle. I was terrified. I wanted this more than anything, but wasn't sure at what expense. If she wasn't happy was it worth it? Can I convince her to let go and I love her just the same if not (somehow)possibly even more? Is she okay with it? Was I? had absolutely no clue how to address it, I convinced myself it was the most taboo subject imaginable and allowed it to build and build to the point that I noticed myself making the most ridiculous and moronic small talk when I caught myself admiring her thighs.
We both grew up in an environment where "fat" was a dirty word. Her aunt is morbidly obese, her mother is well on her way to 300 pounds, she was terrified of following suit, and now here she is in the midst of the very thing happening to her as well. No, I certainly don't want her immobile, no I don't want her to be miserable, no I don't want our relationship to suffer because of my inner turmoil that I've buried for all of these years. Yet so much of me was eating away at myself wanting to confess my desire for her to give into it.
My personal "ideal" FA tastes have always been in the heavily think, if not barely plump department. The super defined hourglass figure if you will with the excessive wide hips. The very thing my wife was now attaining. The old saying of "be careful what you wish for" kept repeating itself over and over in my head each time I watched her wear her bikini down in Florida this past summer, and every single time I watch her climb into and out of the shower.
I just did all I could to "play it cool", don't be an idiot. Follow her lead, and let her tell you what she wants/needs to do.
Then the voice came back again,
"fuck it, you're a grown man, when are you going to have an opportunity like this again? You have a obligation to every single closeted FA out there and especially yourself to take full advantage of a time like this. So what if she feels she has to stop the gain and lose the weight. You have to let her know."
And I gave in.
We're laying in bed not more than 17 hours previous to this very moment as i'm typing this. Making out, enjoying the silence being our child is staying with the grandparents. She rolls over atop me and asks, "what would you like me to do?"
The rush of layer old pubescent panic overwhelmed me. Her fattened thighs were taunting me like this, spreading out over my torso, enticing me in oh so many ways and on top of that she is asking me a loaded question like this. I realize that her perspective isn't anything remotely in the grandiose scheme of things. Definitely more of a here and now sort of request, but I break from this boundary and ask her back.
"Anything?"

"yes, absolutely anything, my love."

See, right there, my god, she called me "her love". That settled it, I sucked it up and like a 14 year old with a cracking voice crossing the gym floor asking for that first dance from the girl you're crushing on in study hall I went for it.'

"Stop dieting."

She laughed and then soon realized I wasn't kidding.

"You're serious?"

"Absolutely".

With that she placed both of her hands at the rounded base of both of her hips and gave them a concerned look.

She replied back......."for you, okay."

Right then I felt like I was finally "out" and the secret was no more and a sense of relief and jubilation overwhelmed me.

Now, i'm a realist, i know that this could all have been an "in the moment lustful decision on her part", i'm no fool. But this morning as we ate breakfast she asked for more sausage and winked at me and i haven't stopped smiling since and had butterflies all day.

Tomorrow i'm making pancakes.



Thank god for a site like this.

--me (a.k.a. Nocturnal)
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Old 08-25-2009, 06:44 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by nocturnal33 View Post
I've been a FA for quite honestly as long as I can remember. However, its literally been a secret of mine for nearly as long. Growing up I would always admire fully figured women, and fantasize about beautiful thin ones filling out. I'm 33 years old, I married a woman who is 5'10" and a one time model/college athlete. More than once she was told she cornered by total strangers that she was Ashley Judd. She is stunningly beautiful and even within the realm of the FA she garnders neck whipping second glances. I fell in love with her for her personality, and her heart. She truly is the most beautiful woman I've ever encountered in my life and her smile melts me even after 10 years of marriage. The way we have fallen hopelessly and completely in love with one another is to such an extent our friends get sick just looking at us for the horrendously loving sap that i am. However, being 5'10" her weight never eclipsed 130 pounds and of course the FA in me has always had to deal with that.
Secretly I always wished for her to let go a bit, not even drastically. 10 pounds, maybe even 15. I loved her and always will, so I opted not to bring it up, just endlessly lurk on sites like this as I have since high school.
Then she acquired a full time nursing position. Erratic schedule, always on the go, meals via drive through, sleeping whenever. Little by little it started to catch up. I'm steadfast in the belief that due to her elastic scrubs the weight she ever so slowly began to accumulate wasn't noticed until it became blatantly obvious that her typical Victoria secret sizes just weren't cutting it.
At her last physical she is now 160. Mind you not exactly the ideal around these parts, but for me a childhood fantasy coming true. Little by little over the past 2 years she is "literally" bottoming out. Still the slight arms, and the most pristine little neck hold her beautifully sculpted head and face but from the waist down it was more than obvious things were giving in to age and lifestyle. I was terrified. I wanted this more than anything, but wasn't sure at what expense. If she wasn't happy was it worth it? Can I convince her to let go and I love her just the same if not (somehow)possibly even more? Is she okay with it? Was I? had absolutely no clue how to address it, I convinced myself it was the most taboo subject imaginable and allowed it to build and build to the point that I noticed myself making the most ridiculous and moronic small talk when I caught myself admiring her thighs.
We both grew up in an environment where "fat" was a dirty word. Her aunt is morbidly obese, her mother is well on her way to 300 pounds, she was terrified of following suit, and now here she is in the midst of the very thing happening to her as well. No, I certainly don't want her immobile, no I don't want her to be miserable, no I don't want our relationship to suffer because of my inner turmoil that I've buried for all of these years. Yet so much of me was eating away at myself wanting to confess my desire for her to give into it.
My personal "ideal" FA tastes have always been in the heavily think, if not barely plump department. The super defined hourglass figure if you will with the excessive wide hips. The very thing my wife was now attaining. The old saying of "be careful what you wish for" kept repeating itself over and over in my head each time I watched her wear her bikini down in Florida this past summer, and every single time I watch her climb into and out of the shower.
I just did all I could to "play it cool", don't be an idiot. Follow her lead, and let her tell you what she wants/needs to do.
Then the voice came back again,
"fuck it, you're a grown man, when are you going to have an opportunity like this again? You have a obligation to every single closeted FA out there and especially yourself to take full advantage of a time like this. So what if she feels she has to stop the gain and lose the weight. You have to let her know."
And I gave in.
We're laying in bed not more than 17 hours previous to this very moment as i'm typing this. Making out, enjoying the silence being our child is staying with the grandparents. She rolls over atop me and asks, "what would you like me to do?"
The rush of layer old pubescent panic overwhelmed me. Her fattened thighs were taunting me like this, spreading out over my torso, enticing me in oh so many ways and on top of that she is asking me a loaded question like this. I realize that her perspective isn't anything remotely in the grandiose scheme of things. Definitely more of a here and now sort of request, but I break from this boundary and ask her back.
"Anything?"

"yes, absolutely anything, my love."

See, right there, my god, she called me "her love". That settled it, I sucked it up and like a 14 year old with a cracking voice crossing the gym floor asking for that first dance from the girl you're crushing on in study hall I went for it.'

"Stop dieting."

She laughed and then soon realized I wasn't kidding.

"You're serious?"

"Absolutely".

With that she placed both of her hands at the rounded base of both of her hips and gave them a concerned look.

She replied back......."for you, okay."

Right then I felt like I was finally "out" and the secret was no more and a sense of relief and jubilation overwhelmed me.

Now, i'm a realist, i know that this could all have been an "in the moment lustful decision on her part", i'm no fool. But this morning as we ate breakfast she asked for more sausage and winked at me and i haven't stopped smiling since and had butterflies all day.

Tomorrow i'm making pancakes.



Thank god for a site like this.

--me (a.k.a. Nocturnal)
Aw this was so lovely to read. Congrats!
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Old 08-26-2009, 12:11 AM   #3
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This story made me cry that is just so sweet.What a lovely woman.
Get her to look at this site and maybe just maybe she will join.
That was a great story very touching.
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Old 08-26-2009, 01:02 AM   #4
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So sorry she has lost an inch in height, and is 10 pounds down from her 170.
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Old 08-26-2009, 10:04 AM   #5
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So sorry she has lost an inch in height, and is 10 pounds down from her 170.
oh Mossy, you observent thang you, ruining all the fantasy!!! lmao
You should change your name to 'observent'.
vant? vent?..hmmm aye.
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Old 08-26-2009, 10:08 AM   #6
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Angry

what do you mean she lost an inch? i don't recall her shrinking any, perhaps i should ask her.
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Old 08-26-2009, 10:14 AM   #7
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what do you mean she lost an inch? i don't recall her shrinking any, perhaps i should ask her.
Don't worry, its only important if YOU lose an inch!!
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Last edited by mergirl; 08-26-2009 at 10:42 AM.
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Old 08-26-2009, 10:33 AM   #8
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Old 08-27-2009, 09:43 AM   #9
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Don't worry, its only important if YOU lose an inch!!


honestly, i think it would bother HER more.
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Old 08-27-2009, 09:57 AM   #10
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honestly, i think it would bother HER more.
Yes indeed.
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Old 08-27-2009, 06:16 PM   #11
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There you ladies go, circling the wagons again

http://dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showpost.php?p=687523&postcount=308
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Old 08-28-2009, 12:02 AM   #12
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What does that expression mean anyway?
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all we ask is that those without fetishes respect the notion that the vast majority of fetish-havers know how to reconcile their kink with the dangers of reality just as you would assume your next door neighbor is not a pedophile.
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Old 08-28-2009, 02:52 AM   #13
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What does that expression mean anyway?
http://dimensionsmagazine.com/forums...&postcount=308

He showed you in stealth mode. Interesting!
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Old 08-28-2009, 03:20 AM   #14
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http://dimensionsmagazine.com/forums...&postcount=308

He showed you in stealth mode. Interesting!
That's an incredibly silly post in that link.
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Old 08-28-2009, 03:34 AM   #15
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what do you mean she lost an inch? i don't recall her shrinking any, perhaps i should ask her.
This is what she means:
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/fo...1&postcount=37

I know, I know, it's spoiling the fun, and i should have left him digging an even bigger digital grave, but it hurts my brain seeing him defending his fantasy.

Mossy, how do you even remember all these posts? It's an incredible feat, albeit a little scary.
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Old 08-28-2009, 03:44 AM   #16
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This is what she means:
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/fo...1&postcount=37

I know, I know, it's spoiling the fun, and i should have left him digging an even bigger digital grave, but it hurts my brain seeing him defending his fantasy.

Mossy, how do you even remember all these posts? It's an incredible feat, albeit a little scary.
She is the rainman of fantasy bursting!
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Old 08-28-2009, 03:50 AM   #17
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She is the rainman of fantasy bursting!
I feel a Rosa Parks joke coming up...
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Old 08-31-2009, 12:47 PM   #18
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Default oh dear, i've been burned

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So sorry she has lost an inch in height, and is 10 pounds down from her 170.

I'm sorry, but a typo of mine from way back when dosen't exclude the fact that i'm not a liar anymore than it proves you've made some sort of point. Yes, my wife is 5'10" not, 5'11', my apologies for the editing deparment missing that one. And yes my wife is still around 160 with her highest weight at one time being 170 i was told.

I wrote this to express a wonderful breakthrough in my life and my relationship with the woman I love; just wanted to share it with other like minded people in a place like that of supposed open mindedness and acceptance.


Perhaps one day your husband can write about you?

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Old 08-31-2009, 02:54 PM   #19
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I'm sorry, but a typo of mine from way back when dosen't exclude the fact that i'm not a liar anymore than it proves you've made some sort of point. Yes, my wife is 5'10" not, 5'11', my apologies for the editing deparment missing that one. And yes my wife is still around 160 with her highest weight at one time being 170 i was told.

I wrote this to express a wonderful breakthrough in my life and my relationship with the woman I love; just wanted to share it with other like minded people in a place like that of supposed open mindedness and acceptance.

Perhaps one day your husband can write about you?

I have no husband.

I just wanted to share this fact with like-minded people in this safe haven of open mindedness and acceptance.

But if I had one, I'd be damn pissed if he made up stories about me, getting my length and weight wrong in virtual conversations on some forum filled with people I don't know anything about.

But that's just me.
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Old 09-01-2009, 06:16 PM   #20
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color me "surprised"
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Old 09-02-2009, 01:47 AM   #21
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I have no idea whether the original poster is telling the truth or not, but I'm puzzled by the reaction here. As a reader, you've got four basic choices:

1) Take the poster's message at face value, and assume the discrepancies were honest errors.

2) Point out the discrepancies in good faith and give the poster a chance to explain them (or not).

3) Write off the poster as a crank and ignore him.

4) Be snarky and mean.

Maybe going with the fourth option makes the site more fun. It seems unnecessarily harsh and negative to me, though.
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Old 09-02-2009, 06:22 AM   #22
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Are you the same nocturnal who has frequented the chat rooms here for several years?
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Old 09-02-2009, 10:00 AM   #23
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snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!snuggletiger has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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I love this laughing doggie
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Old 09-02-2009, 12:20 PM   #24
Jay West Coast
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Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!Jay West Coast keeps pushing the rep limit!
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I have no idea whether the original poster is telling the truth or not, but I'm puzzled by the reaction here. As a reader, you've got four basic choices:

1) Take the poster's message at face value, and assume the discrepancies were honest errors.

2) Point out the discrepancies in good faith and give the poster a chance to explain them (or not).

3) Write off the poster as a crank and ignore him.

4) Be snarky and mean.

Maybe going with the fourth option makes the site more fun. It seems unnecessarily harsh and negative to me, though.
Exactly. I thought the story was really well-written. It might even be just a vignette he's put together to synopsize his 8 years of marriage. Making insinuations based on one inch and ten pounds seems unfair, especially given the context.

Nocturnal: Thanks for posting that. You don't just owe it to closeted FA's, to non-closeted FA's (especially), or to your partner (even more especially). You owe it to yourself at 33 years old to take advantage of the wonderful way that you are. There is no reason you shouldn't have frank and open communication about your sexuality within the context of marriage. Sounds like the best part is yet to come. Way to go; congrats.
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Last edited by Jay West Coast; 09-02-2009 at 12:23 PM.
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Old 09-02-2009, 12:57 PM   #25
LillyBBBW
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LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.
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I've been a FA for quite honestly as long as I can remember. However, its literally been a secret of mine for nearly as long. Growing up I would always admire fully figured women, and fantasize about beautiful thin ones filling out. I'm 33 years old, I married a woman who is 5'10" and a one time model/college athlete. More than once she was told she cornered by total strangers that she was Ashley Judd. She is stunningly beautiful and even within the realm of the FA she garnders neck whipping second glances. I fell in love with her for her personality, and her heart. She truly is the most beautiful woman I've ever encountered in my life and her smile melts me even after 10 years of marriage. The way we have fallen hopelessly and completely in love with one another is to such an extent our friends get sick just looking at us for the horrendously loving sap that i am. However, being 5'10" her weight never eclipsed 130 pounds and of course the FA in me has always had to deal with that.
Secretly I always wished for her to let go a bit, not even drastically. 10 pounds, maybe even 15. I loved her and always will, so I opted not to bring it up, just endlessly lurk on sites like this as I have since high school.
Then she acquired a full time nursing position. Erratic schedule, always on the go, meals via drive through, sleeping whenever. Little by little it started to catch up. I'm steadfast in the belief that due to her elastic scrubs the weight she ever so slowly began to accumulate wasn't noticed until it became blatantly obvious that her typical Victoria secret sizes just weren't cutting it.
At her last physical she is now 160. Mind you not exactly the ideal around these parts, but for me a childhood fantasy coming true. Little by little over the past 2 years she is "literally" bottoming out. Still the slight arms, and the most pristine little neck hold her beautifully sculpted head and face but from the waist down it was more than obvious things were giving in to age and lifestyle. I was terrified. I wanted this more than anything, but wasn't sure at what expense. If she wasn't happy was it worth it? Can I convince her to let go and I love her just the same if not (somehow)possibly even more? Is she okay with it? Was I? had absolutely no clue how to address it, I convinced myself it was the most taboo subject imaginable and allowed it to build and build to the point that I noticed myself making the most ridiculous and moronic small talk when I caught myself admiring her thighs.
We both grew up in an environment where "fat" was a dirty word. Her aunt is morbidly obese, her mother is well on her way to 300 pounds, she was terrified of following suit, and now here she is in the midst of the very thing happening to her as well. No, I certainly don't want her immobile, no I don't want her to be miserable, no I don't want our relationship to suffer because of my inner turmoil that I've buried for all of these years. Yet so much of me was eating away at myself wanting to confess my desire for her to give into it.
My personal "ideal" FA tastes have always been in the heavily think, if not barely plump department. The super defined hourglass figure if you will with the excessive wide hips. The very thing my wife was now attaining. The old saying of "be careful what you wish for" kept repeating itself over and over in my head each time I watched her wear her bikini down in Florida this past summer, and every single time I watch her climb into and out of the shower.
I just did all I could to "play it cool", don't be an idiot. Follow her lead, and let her tell you what she wants/needs to do.
Then the voice came back again,
"fuck it, you're a grown man, when are you going to have an opportunity like this again? You have a obligation to every single closeted FA out there and especially yourself to take full advantage of a time like this. So what if she feels she has to stop the gain and lose the weight. You have to let her know."
And I gave in.
We're laying in bed not more than 17 hours previous to this very moment as i'm typing this. Making out, enjoying the silence being our child is staying with the grandparents. She rolls over atop me and asks, "what would you like me to do?"
The rush of layer old pubescent panic overwhelmed me. Her fattened thighs were taunting me like this, spreading out over my torso, enticing me in oh so many ways and on top of that she is asking me a loaded question like this. I realize that her perspective isn't anything remotely in the grandiose scheme of things. Definitely more of a here and now sort of request, but I break from this boundary and ask her back.
"Anything?"

"yes, absolutely anything, my love."

See, right there, my god, she called me "her love". That settled it, I sucked it up and like a 14 year old with a cracking voice crossing the gym floor asking for that first dance from the girl you're crushing on in study hall I went for it.'

"Stop dieting."

She laughed and then soon realized I wasn't kidding.

"You're serious?"

"Absolutely".

With that she placed both of her hands at the rounded base of both of her hips and gave them a concerned look.

She replied back......."for you, okay."

Right then I felt like I was finally "out" and the secret was no more and a sense of relief and jubilation overwhelmed me.

Now, i'm a realist, i know that this could all have been an "in the moment lustful decision on her part", i'm no fool. But this morning as we ate breakfast she asked for more sausage and winked at me and i haven't stopped smiling since and had butterflies all day.

Tomorrow i'm making pancakes.



Thank god for a site like this.

--me (a.k.a. Nocturnal)
Wow. That was a great story nocturnal. I hope things go well for both of you.
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Have you hugged a fat girl today?

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