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Old 01-26-2010, 11:38 PM   #1
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Default Question for all FAs out there who took a while to know they were FAs....

I have a gay friend who is employed as a police officer and he is in his early 40s. He really had a difficult time coming out. Although when you ask him now, he says he truthfully "always knew he was gay", he tried to deny to himself that he was actually gay - this being in his late teens and early 20s. During this "self-hating" time as he coins it, he actually went out and bullied and picked on other gay people. He claims what helped him is that once he started Police training (a) he could no longer bully people and (b) he could no longer lie to himself and hide the truth from others. So, he came out of the closet and now works closely with the anti-hate department of his force and he often is called upon to investigate gay bashing and like crimes.

So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

I am sorry if there are other posts like this but I just find it sad and tragic that my police friend felt the need to bully others for his (at the time) being ashamed of being gay. I know that being an FA/FFA is alot different than being gay but I am wondering if anyone has a story with similar issues as my gay friend's experience.

And I am sorry in advance if I have offended anyone. I am not always that good at articulating my thoughts and hope I have made sense here.

xoxoxoxo

Dreamy
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Last edited by DreamyInToronto; 01-26-2010 at 11:40 PM. Reason: typos, it's late. xoxo
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Old 01-26-2010, 11:53 PM   #2
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1. Always knew, not ashamed
2. Never picked on anyone
3. 1996
4. Out to everybody, family and friends haven't made a peep in all this time.
5. Never hid anyone from family.
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Old 01-27-2010, 12:12 AM   #3
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great questions Dreamy. I look forward to reading some of the answers
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Old 01-27-2010, 12:25 AM   #4
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Definitely needs to be moved to the FA forum pronto. lol

1. Before I was 12 I didn't know about it. To me it was just another trait that some people had. I felt nothing from it.

2. After 12, there weren't very many people whom I picked on due to their weight. There's one I remember specifically that I badgered a bit more than others when I was 15, and that did have something to do with shame I will admit. But at the same time it wasn't me being confrontational about the whole thing. I would just retort with it occasionally, because we butted heads a lot when we first met. Recently I apologized (I moved and lost touch for awhile), but we somewhat settled our differences long before then.

3. Age 16.

4. Nope. I'll always tell the truth when asked. (But plus 1 on what LoveBHMS said below. There's a lot of ways I can show it, but I don't talk about it all the time. But what I said still applies.)

5. No.
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Old 01-27-2010, 12:27 AM   #5
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1. Yes, No.
2. Not to their face, but have said mean things behind people's back. Wasn't related to shame of being an FFA, just being a bitch. Most people if they're honest have said mean shit behind other people's backs at some time.
3. Nothing really to "come clean" about.
4. Not really, no. I can't say every single person I've ever met would know but that's more a matter of not necessarily discussing my personal life with some people and also a matter of understanding some people might react negatively. In some cases I would not be likely to tell an actual fat guy that I'm an FFA--typically if he's uneasy about his size.
5. No.
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Old 01-27-2010, 02:23 AM   #6
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?


I have always preferred to be held by my bigger relatives, and I found their soft, squishy bodies quite fascinating but I didn't realise it is a preference until I am old enough to be sexually attracted to others. I have never been ashamed of the fact that I prefer fat people, but I did experience some FA guilt about whether the person I love is healthy, if having body image issues at that time made me a hypocrite and if I should help them lose weight so that they have an easier time fitting in.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

No. I used to get bullied and picked on for being "chubby" so I wouldn't do it to anyone else.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?


I never had to officially come out or anything. I think it is pretty obvious to most people who know me as my exes are generally quite a lot bigger than I am.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)


It is not something I go around broadcasting, and I do date the occasional thin person so I imagine that some people might think that I just don't care about size.

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?


No problems with friends but I have never felt comfortable introducing ex-partners to family. My family is both fat-phobic and homophobic, but they are usually too preoccupied with my partner's gender to care about her weight, though they might mention it along with other attributes they hate (eg. crooked nose, bad skin, smoker, not educated enough, not rich enough, not religious enough). They have been particularly vicious to an ex, so I am not eager to repeat the experience. Most of the people I date don't want to meet my family anyway, and I don't insist.
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Old 01-27-2010, 04:41 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
1. I've always been attracted to fat women, even before I hit puberty. As a child, I wouldnít necessarily say I was ashamed of it, but I was afraid of hearing peopleís negative thoughts about it, so I kept it to myself. But in my senior year of high school, I came out to everyone I knew, and Iíve never regretted doing so.
2. Honestly, I never have. Even as a child, I felt bad when other kids on the playground would mock the fat kids. I knew this wasnít something I wanted to do.
3. As I said in question 1, I came out in my senior year of high school.
4. Iím fully out. I donít hide it from anyone. I mean, no, I donít bring intentionally bring it up in conversation the first time I meet someone, but if it comes up, I wonít hide it.
5. No. I mean, my only family is my aunt, and she knows I love fat girls. Sheís got no feelings one way or the other. And my friends (what few that I do have) all know.
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Old 01-27-2010, 05:45 PM   #8
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

Yes, I have always known, and yes, I have been ashamed about it.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

No, I never did.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

When I got access to internet and found out I was not alone with my preference.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)


Depends on how you define "coming out". I don't usually tell people I prefer big women, unless the subject comes up. Therefore some people know, most not. But they have seen my ex, so they can draw their own conclusion if they want.

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?


No. If someone hides their partner from family or friends because he/she is ashamed, he/she should not have started the relationship in the first place.
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Old 01-27-2010, 06:52 PM   #9
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Wow great questions, and beautifully articulated to my eye. Also, i think the gay analogy works really well for me, at least among people who see being gay as innate and beyond choice rather than a mere "lifestyle choice", comparable to whether you wear a necktie. I never chose being an FA, and sometimes i used to feel life would be easier if i weren't; thank goodness that today i am a happy FA who feels fortunate that i am largely immune to the insanities of pop culture (it can't be easy going to highschool nowadays).

the survey:
1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

I have been an FA so long that there wasn't any language for it. I remember a few encounters with big (or ...sigh... huge) women when i was in my adolescence. I was in an all-boys public school, so not only were BBWs a distant ideal, but ALL women too.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

No.... i was a chubby kid for awhile, then got thinner. I was pretty shy when i went to my first co-ed school, but by then it was the "adult" context of university. I was lucky that the college i went to simply didn't have that sort of behaviour.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

My first wife was a SSBBW. My family liked her. My second wife was a bbw. It's more or less known in the family. When a sister once said something really gross about how one of them looks in a bathing suit, i felt good that no one else in the family sided with her, but instead understood that such talk is hateful. But i think it helps that all of us --all sibs plus my mom-- have at one time or other been overweight, so my thin fit sister didn't realize she was surrounded by people whose sympathies were naturally with the chubbier person.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

It's well known by friends & co-workers, at least where it isn't totally inappropriate to talk about such things. Most people probably don't give a darn, surely (i would be grandiose if i thought anyone really cares about my preferences).

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

No.
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Old 01-28-2010, 06:38 PM   #10
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Default Thank you

All of the replies have been so great so far and very insightful. Just giving this post a bump!

xoxoxox
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Old 01-29-2010, 02:15 PM   #11
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#1

I always knew clearly that I liked fat women. I don't think I had a firm grasp on what "it" was. I knew that I was odd because all the women that everyone else was talking about I could care less about.
It definatly made me feel like an outsider. I did not want to share any of this with anybody.

#2

No People generally picked on me not the other way round.

#3

During my college years.

#4

I'm married so I am definatly out, that whole public ceremony thing. I just do my thing I don't normally broadcast everything to everybody.

#5

Yes I am sad that I did do this for a while. It probably had more to do with the fact that my parents didn't like the girl than because she was fat. I had a huge crush on her but were were more pals than anything but I did sort of hide this relationship.
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Old 01-29-2010, 03:54 PM   #12
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1. I never realized I was an Fa until I was about in my early teens.

2. I never picked on anyone because of their weight. I was the one picked on.

3. I only told my dad and my friend I was an FA. Either than that, I really don't talk about my sexual preferences or attitudes with my family and friends. We're not squeamish about sex, but we prefer to keep that kind of thing private.

4. See above

5.No, because I've never had a girlfriend.
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Old 01-29-2010, 09:23 PM   #13
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

I always knew I was a FFA and no I was never ashamed of it. However, I usually kept my distance from big people (muscular or fat) because of the stereo types of the supersize ... and because of the supersized people I did meet, I noticed they had a habit of tooling those around them.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

No I don't recall ever being a bully or picking on people but I used to break up fights and I couldn't stand to see people get bullied or picked on so I ended up beating up bullies and calling bullies out on their bs.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

I never been in the closet. The funny thing is my friends are always pointing out fat folks to me and sending me pics whenever they find them.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

Once again ..never been in the closet except to those I do find attractive...well..until I feel comfortable around them.

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

No, but I come from a family of open FA's. So I didn't have to worry about that in the first place.
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Old 01-31-2010, 07:40 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
I always was an FA but it was a long time before I realized that I was. It took time reviewing the real life women to whom I was attracted to realize that plumpness was a common denominator.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
Being a kid who was picked on for various reasons, I made it a point to not pick on people as a rule. I did a little razzing of people in my college days, but not about weight.

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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?
It all depends on what you mean by come clean.

It was in the middle of my first long term relationship (with a recovering anorectic no less) that I realized what I liked. So that is when I "came clean" with myself. I also gained the realization that I was trying to make her over because of being an FA (which given her past was the most wrong thing I could have been doing at the time).

I told her what I realized I was doing and told her that I'd stop trying to change her. We broke up years later for other reasons and I have been fishing in the right waters ever since.

Sometimes a BBW that I am with will need to be reassured that I do like them fat (because many of them don't like themselves that way) and yes, some do find that creepy. I don't think I am a freak because I like what I like and I get upset that they do.

And while I don't go announcing what I like to the world indiscriminately, if someone notices what I like, I do admit to it. To me, it's like being ashamed of liking strawberry ice cream over chocolate. That is to say, there is no point to it. If you have an issue with people liking strawberry ice cream, that's really your problem, isn't it?

Quote:
Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)
No. Life's too short to be worried about what other people think, at least in this regard.

Quote:
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5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
No. I was hidden by the aforementioned anorectic from her family for other reasons and I know how that feels. I would never hide someone I truly cared about. It was humiliating. I was young and was willing to put up with a lot back then. Now, not so much.
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Old 01-31-2010, 08:34 AM   #15
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1. Since I was about 11, and yes

2. No

3. When I was 15ish

4. I'm out as far as if anybody asks me about it, I'll say yes. It's not really a big deal.

5. No
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Old 01-31-2010, 03:49 PM   #16
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Dreamy, that is a really interesting story about your friend and his sexuality. Too often do I hear about gay bashing. Often times even in our own government where some people dislike homosexuals, that later turn out to be... homosexual. Self hate is a terrible thing and I am happy your friend is comfortable with himself now

Now, to answer the questions

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

I didn't always know I was an FA. I used to believe that I wanted to get fat. I was never entirely clear on the subject myself. But as I got older, it hit me like a ton of bricks that I liked fat on women. When it hit me, things began to make a lot more sense to me.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?


I was never one to pick on or bully when I was in school, because I was in no way better than anyone... never will be either. I was also picked on cause I was never the cool kid myself, because I was a bit more childish in nature where my friends tried to grow up too fast and had no sense of being polite to anyone. I was also in some special classes because I could not hear until I was 4, so I was always kind of a step back from everyone. So when I was being made fun of, so were the people of plus size that I went to school with.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?


I came clean with my FAness when I was pretty much going from freshman into sophomore year of highschool. It was amazing! I loved it. The freedom and how my eyes actually darted around looking at bigger girls. I felt like an actual guy that would watch women walk by and be like "Damn, that is nice!" But as I went into my sophomore year, I met a girl and we dated for a long time. I told my friends I was an FA, as well as my parents. They don't seem to mind... and if they did, I wouldn't care :P

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)


I responded to that one in the previous question. Yes, my friends and family know and they are ok with it

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?


Nope, never had a need or desire to hide them. If I am dating a BBW, I will show her off to my friends and family. It is kinda like bringing a super model home to my friends and family, although they may not see it, I do and I love it!
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Old 02-01-2010, 12:14 PM   #17
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2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
No one has responded yes to this question, but it does happen. I just remember someone I know from university. He was always joking and making fun about big women, but I think it was a way of trying to hide his preference at all cost because when I met him again a few years later, his girl friend was clearly a BBW.
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Old 03-30-2010, 12:10 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?
4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)
5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
1.) I was about 17 when i discovered the fat admiration thing. I've never been ashamed of it.
2.) No
3.) I guess it was in my twenties (long time before the internet), when I figured out that many many men exits who love bigger women. I was definite not the only one. With that knowledge I thought loving a fat girl is normal.
4.) I'm married to a SSBBW. She's to big to hide.
5.) No. Reaction of people concerns not only the aspect of fatness.
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Old 03-30-2010, 05:28 PM   #19
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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post

So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?



Dreamy
1 - yes, no

2 - that's insane

3 - I've never hidden from anyone who I find attractive

4 - i don't hide who I'm attracted to from anyone

5 - um no
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Old 03-31-2010, 10:09 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post

So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
I always liked fat girls -- my first crush was the chubby girl in my grade 4 class. I don't know if you'd call it ashamed but I never told anyone I liked big girls until high school -- and then only a few close friends.

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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
Since I was usually the fattest kid in the class (or at least the heaviest) I wasn't really in a position to do much bullying -- I was usually on the other end.

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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?
As an FA you can come out of the closet a in small steps by telling people: "I like busty girls and its OK if they're a bit chubby" then "chubby girls are alright" then "she's fat but really nice/pretty/fun" then finally "OK, if you hadn't figured it out already, I do like fat chicks."

FYI when I married my wife she weighed 410lbs -- so I think I'm totally out to the closet now.

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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)
I came out to my friends much earlier than I did to family or coworkers.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
Sad to say, yes. I went to high school in a small town in northern Alberta. First, I had a chubby girl friend in Edmonton (an hours drive south) and hung out with thin girls at school. I then got a local fat girl friend but we never went out together -- I would hang out with her at her house and then go out with my friends without her (I was a total jerk). As a young adult I'd be open about 180-250 pound girl friends but kept the 300-600 pound ones hidden.

Last edited by bigmac; 03-31-2010 at 10:11 AM. Reason: grammer
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Old 03-31-2010, 11:51 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post

So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
1. I knew from the time I was about 6 that I had a fascination with fat. I had the hugest crush on this girl in my first grade class who was the biggest girl I had ever seen at that point in my life. I had a crush on her simply because I wanted to caress her fat.

2. I never picked on anyone because of their weight- that's awful! I actually made more friends with bigger people because coincidentally, they were the nicest people in school.

3. My close friends, boyfriend, and of course, people on this website, know about my preferences.

4. I keep it from my family, because I have yet to fully accept myself. At this point in my life, I would find their reaction hurtful.

5. I have never had a bbw or bhm partner, but I would definitely love to.
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Old 03-31-2010, 08:28 PM   #22
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
Well, I knew that I was fascinated by men of that size, but it wasn't until high school that I started to realize that my fascination was attraction.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
No. I would never do that.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?
Well, I have friends whom I have told outright that I prefer BHMs, but most people have just guessed based on my past relationships and current hubby.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)
See above.

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
Well, I have never hid a BHM boyfriend, but my first true BHM boyfriend (not just a little chubby but big), he was initially more hesitant to be affectionate towards me in public. I didn't find out until later that he was confused as to why I was attracted in him and that's why he was hesitant to hold hands, kiss, etc.
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Old 03-31-2010, 11:17 PM   #23
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
Until I learned there was a term for my preference it was just that, a preference that I never gave a thought to but acted on regularly from as far back as I can remember.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
Back when girls were icky (2nd grade or so) the chubby girls were the ones I gave attention to by means of picking on or teasing them, chasing them, or trying to gross them out but never did picking on them or teasing them enter into the context of size. So, No and No to this question.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?
My preference was never hidden although it was also not branded until I found dimensions and other size friendly sites and found out there was a term to use regarding "guys that like fat girls". There was no need to come out or come clean regarding it since I have always lived openly through my preference, dating within it, and never denying it when questioned regarding it.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)
I am out in a flaming flag waving manner, although I don't feel the need to make it an unsolicited topic of discussion, I do have fat girls as tattoos, fat girl emblazoned shirts and other fat positive things that are worn openly and displayed and I answer questions regarding my preference when asked but let anyone too shy to ask figure it out on their own. I do not hide my preference from anybody.

5a. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or b.) were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
a.) I have never hidden a girlfriend from friends and family, that would be disrespectful to her and would imply a sense of shame toward her as a person and a woman. b.) It would be ambiguous to act both proud and ashamed of a chosen partner/mate as well as hypocritical. (see also previous answer to this question)
I see it this way: Any woman who chooses to date and be a partner to me is a privilege to be with, not a right or guilty pleasure to be hidden and enjoyed in private regardless of size, race, or ethnicity.

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Old 04-01-2010, 03:28 PM   #24
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I'v always knew I was a FFA but when I was younger I didn't really understand the feelings I always had for big guys. I have never been ashamed of what I am but I use to get nervous when I would try to explain it to a bhm.

No I wouldn't pick on people for that.

I never really came clean, most of my friends had figured it out, not something that was hard to do. The few people that didn't understand or asked me about it I would explain it to them.

I'm not really "out" to my family but its only because if I say anything about who I prefer to date they don't want to hear about it and choose to ignore what I say. When I bring a bhm home with me they pretend not to notice, when I bring home a girl they pretend we are just friends, they choose to live in denial and I let them. Everyone else knows that I'm a FFA.

No I have never hid someone that I am dating, I usually show them off!
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Old 04-02-2010, 01:52 AM   #25
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
I knew it since my puberty and I was never ashamed

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
Never

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?
I basically did it from the beginning. All my friends knew and know, all my relatives my age or younger kow

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?).
I never told my parents (in my young days you didn't tell your parents of your sexual life) but I'm pretty sure they understood. They saw some of my BBW girlfriends


5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
Never, see the question above
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