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Old 04-22-2010, 07:40 PM   #51
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Originally Posted by CastingPearls View Post
Someone rep John Blaze for punch and pie, please.
(could it be spiked punch???) <wistful, hopeful, plaintive>
Don't worry I did . Darn i cant rep you for 24 hours pearl
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Old 04-22-2010, 10:43 PM   #52
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1. Since about age 17. I always knew I was "weird" but 17 was when I put it all together & was all like, "Hell yeah, this is awesome!"

2. No. Infact it was the opposite. I usually go out of my way to tell a fat girl she looks pretty. This can be as simple as "Wow, I really like your shoes" to "Damn girl, you real thick; lets spoon".

3. I seem to recall telling my closest circle of friends something along the lines of, "I like fatties." right after I met my first serious girl friend. Most of them are indifferent & all of them are entertained. I've been sighted by a few of their girl friends as examples to their fat friends that genuinely nice & relatively attractive young men do enjoy rubinequse ladies. This always makes me smile. It feels good to know you can give some one out there a little self esteem & dare I say hope.

4. Out? Flaming is more like it lol.

5. No & not because this situation never presented itself. No because I am not insane.
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Old 04-25-2010, 07:55 AM   #53
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Well I dumped my girlfriend and told my friends I'm a FA. I was completely surprised how my frends reacted, they didnt shun me or anything, they just said they were surprised. I regret not doing this earlier cause i thought it would be a horrendous experience when in fact it is the most relaxing thing I have ever done. The stress just went away revealing this to my good friends. (I still gotta deal with my ex, but it was worth it).
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Old 04-25-2010, 10:00 AM   #54
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1. When I stated secondary school (middle school), the whole year was put into different classes. Someone I knew was friends with someone from another class, and as soon as I saw her friend who was a big girl I felt a stiring downstairs lol and knew instantly that I liked big girls. Not ashamed of myself for liking big girls, but think I'm kinda ashamed to let my family know (then again my mum is absolutely terrible, the amount of times I've heard "look at that woman, shes enooooormous" )

2. Never bullied any Big Girl, gave them secret valentines cards haha

3. Came clean to some good friends, and they understand, and they actually helped me go throught a time I was fed up cause no big girls about. Its hard to hear, but they said I need to lower my standards, which I have.

4. (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?) Yep, as I mentioned in ques 1 and might be something to do with how my parents walked in when I was looking at some big girl pics when I was 16 lol and I had to tell them I was looking at a joke site (One of the rare few times I've lied)
I'm now 22, I'm pretty sure someone found a flyer for a bbw organisation I left lying around, and
5. they know a couple of girls I've liked have been big girls, so I think they might've figured it out.
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Old 04-28-2010, 07:28 AM   #55
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Well I dumped my girlfriend and told my friends I'm a FA. I was completely surprised how my frends reacted, they didnt shun me or anything, they just said they were surprised. I regret not doing this earlier cause i thought it would be a horrendous experience when in fact it is the most relaxing thing I have ever done. The stress just went away revealing this to my good friends. (I still gotta deal with my ex, but it was worth it).
i mean, were you entirely with your girlfriend for superficial reasons? good job and good luck with coming out but that part was jarring to say the least.
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Old 04-28-2010, 12:34 PM   #56
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good for you nutty, glad your on the way to what you want.
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Old 04-28-2010, 04:24 PM   #57
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I have a gay friend who is employed as a police officer and he is in his early 40s. He really had a difficult time coming out. Although when you ask him now, he says he truthfully "always knew he was gay", he tried to deny to himself that he was actually gay - this being in his late teens and early 20s. During this "self-hating" time as he coins it, he actually went out and bullied and picked on other gay people. He claims what helped him is that once he started Police training (a) he could no longer bully people and (b) he could no longer lie to himself and hide the truth from others. So, he came out of the closet and now works closely with the anti-hate department of his force and he often is called upon to investigate gay bashing and like crimes.

So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

I am sorry if there are other posts like this but I just find it sad and tragic that my police friend felt the need to bully others for his (at the time) being ashamed of being gay. I know that being an FA/FFA is alot different than being gay but I am wondering if anyone has a story with similar issues as my gay friend's experience.

And I am sorry in advance if I have offended anyone. I am not always that good at articulating my thoughts and hope I have made sense here.

xoxoxoxo

Dreamy



1. I have always found some large women attractive, but I was not a declared FA until I was 25. If I had not interacted with the size acceptance movement, I would not have known what a BBW or an FA was.

2. I never picked on anyone because of weight. It was not in my nature to pick on people, as I was often the kid who got picked on because I was a nerd or because people thought I was gay.

3. I didn't realize I was an FA until I was 24. That was the first time I slept with a woman, but we just fooled around.

4. I see no need to hide my preferences. Most people who know me know I like large women. I just don't go out of my way to volunteer unless asked or unless people start picking on fat women and I want them to stop.

5. I have not had any serious girlfriends, but none of the women I have gone out with have met my family. That is because the relationship did not get deep enough for that to happen. I have not dated a lot of women.


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Old 06-28-2010, 08:07 PM   #58
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1. I can't recall exactly what got me into an FA. There was a number of influences at the time, I was in 7th-8th grade then and I found some BBW fanart on DA and that's when I realized when I was truly attracted to larger women. It was the same case in RL, I found myself finding fat girls more attractive then any other girl in school. I thought it was weird, but then I joined DA to find out about more of these artists making BBW artwork then stumbled upon an entire FA community and met people with the same interest. From there on, I accepted that I was an FA and went by the name of 'ghostunknown' since. I then had an weird idea that kept floating in my head so I made a story to get it out of my head and that's how I got into writing WG prose.

2. Na, I'm not out as an FA.

3. Nope, keeping this whole FA thing private for now in RL.

4. Not in RL.

5. You know, I always wanted to do something like that. To have a secret FA/BBW friend to hang and talk with was once a little fantasy of mine hehe XP. But I never got to doing anything like that though. Finding out who's really an FA or BBW in RL is quite tricky, but I always wanted a private BBW friend! Oh well, maybe in college I'll find someone hehe!
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Old 06-29-2010, 10:40 AM   #59
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1. No there was a time when it was not clear that I was an FA, but yes I was ashamed of it at first.

2. Yes. I was bullied about being a FA once it became apparent.

3. With my immediate family I have come clean with being a FA.

4. Yes, there are family member that I still hid it from.

5. And, yes I have hid a girlfriend before I was came clean with my family.
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Old 06-29-2010, 01:45 PM   #60
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1) Looking back, I know that I've been an FA since
at least age 11. I wrote The Visitor
[/U][/U]about a daydream/vision I had at age 12.

2) I never picked on or bullied people over their
weight.

3) I "came clean" in my early 20's when I could
not deny that I found heavy women most
sexually attractive.

4) I do not hide being an FA from anyone.

5) I have never hid any BBW girlfriend from my
family, friends, or even church.
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Old 07-01-2010, 08:04 AM   #61
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1. I never knew the term "FA" until recently so I didn't know anything about it.

2. To be completely honest, I picked on plenty of big girls about their weight but not because I was ashamed. I didn't always like big girls but I didn't go out of my way to make fun of them. They used to always start with me. There was one who swore up and down she was gonna beat my ass because her friend was my GF for a while and she was jealous. There was another who got her friends together and tried to force me to have sex with her but I got away in the end. .

3. I don't consider myself an FA and there is a simple reason for that. FA, or "Fat Admirer" implies that I admire or fantasize only about girls of a larger size. I say I'm not one because I don't only prefer or look at bigger women. I still like smaller women who be considered "Thick" or "Skinny" by people here. I always tell people that I just like women in general. I've never had a specific type, I always go by the individual. If I like the individual at the time of first meeting or whenever, I may pursue them or I may not. What happened was at a certain time in my life, I decided to stop discriminating against big girls just because they were big and gave a couple a chance. I've always been a butt man so they bigger butts of larger women already appealed to me and I slowly found other things I liked about them particularly but not enough to make me renounce all other sized women. The only size women I don't like is skeleton skinny women. Really though, I like women in general and BBW/SSBBW just a little more than the others.

In that same breath though, it's funny to me because I like SSBBW a little more than BBW in the sense that I get more excited when I see an extremely large girl with nice curves and face rather than a BBW who is just a little on the larger side.

4. I didn't know liking big girls was the same as being gay or lesbian but anway.......yes, my family and friends do know I like big girls alongside other girls. The only part of my family who even cares are my teenage cousins and it's only because they've seen the girls I've been with in the past and can't believe I would start dating big girls. None of my friends care either, we still talk about the same things and life goes on. Another reason I don't consider myself an FA because people almost make it seem like a lifestyle choice. It's not that big of a deal to me that I like big girls, life is still the same lol.

5. Nope never hid them for any reason. The first big girl I was with when I decided to start dating them came to my mama's house on several occasions when I was still living with my mom. She spent the night the first time she came to house and it was on the 4th of July lol. But on topic, I haven't hid any other big girls either because I see no reason. I've always been the "I don't give a f****" type of person and I always say, Society can kiss my ass, I do what I want with whomever I want.

Sorry my answers are long too, I can't help it lol.

Last edited by EvilPrincess; 07-06-2010 at 08:42 PM. Reason: edited for forum guidelines
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Old 08-16-2010, 09:14 PM   #62
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Originally Posted by DreamyInToronto View Post
So my question to all the FAs/FFAs out here -

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
Came across this thread.. thought I should contribute my answers...

1) I would have to say it was a slow path to realising what I truly desired. Probably not until well into my 20's did I identify as an FA (or even know what an FA was). You have to know a world exists before you can be a part of it. I was never ashamed.. but was a little guarded at first.

2) Never did any projection like that.

3) I guess I 'came clean' when I realised what an FA was and how it matched my desires. I slowly started telling more and more people. It was interesting seeing different people's reactions.

4) Pretty much out everywhere.

5) I've never hid anyone but I can understand wanting to shelter a partner from what might be a hostile reception or unpredictable response from an unforgiving parental figure and not knowing exactly what might happen. It can be a tough thing on all people involved. Older parents of a different generation and rigid fixed thinking might never understand. The same can apply to a friend with little empathy or no understanding too.


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Old 08-20-2010, 10:18 PM   #63
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When I was a little boy, I was also fascinated with fat men. It later became fat women. I realized that it was different when I was about a week or so away from 15. At that point, I only accepted that I liked big women. I accepted the fact that I like men much later. It hasn't even been a year since I did that.
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Old 08-21-2010, 01:50 PM   #64
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

Always known. Not really ever ashamed, but I've resented it at times for limiting my dating pool, the friction it causes with a partner who is fat but would prefer you love her and her body like a non-FA. Never really felt bad about the "bad" FAs who apparently give the rest a bad name because I can only be responsible for myself and if anyone writes me off as a bad just because I'm an FA then it's their loss, I guess.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

No. I don't even see why anyone would. Why would you do that to cute chubby people?

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

I come clean if someone asks in a manner that doesn't sound like a prelude to harassment. I always come clean before getting anywhere near a relationship. My parents may or may not know, and if they want to know I'll tell them but I think they tend to respect my boundaries quite well.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)

I don't hide anything, but I don't sit on my porch on Halloween and tell everyone who comes by while I had out candy. (I've wanted to make a statement on how creepy the thing this is referencing is. Claim "they edited the footage of Mark to make him look creepy!" all you want, I don't care.)

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

No. Never. Have or will.
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Old 08-21-2010, 03:16 PM   #65
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA
Pretty much, yeah.

and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?
For most of my life and sometimes still now, yes.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?
NO and no

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA?
Online not too long ago.

Or have you?
Not in real life, no

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)
No

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?
No, never been lucky enough to have a chubby boyfriend.
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Old 08-25-2010, 10:42 PM   #66
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1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?

I never really knew until last year. My crushes and respective boyfriends from 7th grade onwards always had a good amount of gut on them, though many slimmed down when high school came around. (I really got over those ones fast. It's peculiar, and telling, in retrospect.)

Notably, I had a crush on a diabetic kid who had trimmed down (mostly) before I met him, and I was really curious to see pictures of when he was little...and very fat...

Despite my long-term trends and forceful mantra I played in my head to 'find a thin guy so that my kids will inherit slimmer genes and won't have to put up with being overweight like me', my preference was still pronounced. I've never dated or been really deeply attracted long-term to a bony guy. There were a few crushes here and there who were stick-thin, but, then again, I don't know how much of that was me telling myself 'he's perfect for me...he's X, he's Y, and he's THIN!'

In any case, I didn't have a name for my preference...nor did I even really acknowledge a true preference, for I hid it even from myself...until I ran across this site just this past year.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

Not while being specifically an FFA. Before I had any sexual preferences at all, YES. I remember hating people simply because they were chubby from a very early age. I daresay it is because my mother would criticize my peers, and I would regenerate her criticism, in a childish way. I suppose her critique was not always because of their fatness, but that was always the part of her argument that latched onto my conscious apperception of the situation.

I see the reason for this, in retrospect, was because of my own fascination with fat.

So I maintained an extreme level of loathing towards them as well that I still feel the pangs of today. When I think of X girl, or Y girl, or Z girl, I remember immediately how 'fat' they were and how I'd eschew them...even going so far as to tell them that I eschewed them because of their fatness.

I deeply lament any harm that I might have done to the (at least) four poor girls that received the brunt of my cruelty. And yes, I WAS cruel. Youth is evil, no?

Over the years, especially when I had eating disorders (bulemia notably), I still held it against people sometimes, but inevitably I still definitely NOTICED fat people.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?

The only person to whom I have admitted the deep roots of my fascination with fat is my darling ex-boyfriend, who is still a dear friend. I think I do have a problem with that...because he rather misinterprets it...but I'll introduce that on another thread.

I think I did mention once to my mum something about fattening up my ex, but I wouldn't presume that she took that in a sexual way. It's actually rather terrible...even the visualisation of domestically-accumulated flab excites me. It's...hm...should dedicate yet another thread to this.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)


Absolutely. I'm actually trying to quell my own fascination's preeminence in how I look at the world, because I really am a chaste person and am seriously religious. So I won't talk about it with anyone save, perhaps, that boyfriend in the future whom I will dedicate my life to in marriage.


5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

Nah. Never been in the position to do so. I think some members of my family have noticed that I prefer bigger boys, but probably do not attribute any fantastic significance to it.

Since I am a very prudish person in general, I doubt they would ever think of it.


All in all, very interesting survey, thanks for the questions. Very thoughtful, and thought-provoking.
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Old 09-12-2010, 09:31 PM   #67
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I thought this thread was so interesting, I wanted to answer the survey too...

1. Did you always know clearly that you were an FA/FFA and if so, were you ever ashamed of it?


Not always--it was kind of a gradual period of realization during my last few years of college and first few years after college. I'm not ashamed of it but I feel like people are sometimes weirded out by it so I don't volunteer the information unless I feel really comfortable.

2. Did you ever bully or pick on anyone about their weight while secretly being an FA/FFA - and you did this because you were ashamed?

I think I may have done this to other girls in those terribly insecure junior high/high school years. Never to anyone's face, just stupid comments behind their backs to reassure myself "at least I'm not as fat as her," which I find ridiculous and sad now.

3. When did you "come clean" about being a FA/FFA? Or have you?


LOL, if you mean in the sense that I sat my friends and family down and told them my preferences, no, that never happened. I just started dating fat guys and nobody really seemed to care cause the guys were always great guys and very nice to me.

4. Are you "out" to some people but not others? (i.e. all your friends know but you hide it from your family?)


I'm out to a few friends in the sense that they know that I like fat guys very, very much and they think it's sweet. I'm sure anyone else could figure out my preferences, I've just never bothered to spell them out.

5. Have you ever hid a BBW/BHM friend or girlfriend from your friends or family either because you were ashamed of your preference or were you proud of them but you hid them because of the way you thought your family would react?

At one point in my life when I was terribly insecure (going to a school I didn't think I was smart/talented enough to be in), and was newly dating a very big guy, I did feel a little weird about fellow students seeing him pick me up at school. I feel stupid saying that now--I'm sure none of them cared, and I wound up marrying the guy.
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