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Old 05-06-2010, 02:35 PM   #1
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Default Sure signs that he's not what he says he is

internet dating is tough--especially for the uninitiated. sometimes people are married. sometimes they are closeted. sometimes they just yank a BBWs chain generally. what are some hints and clues you've heard to help people to avoid the pitfalls of internet dating? are there some dead giveaways that he isn't single or employed etc... if its happened to you or friends you now lets hear it. maybe it can help somebody. i guess this is the dims version of "don't date him girl!" with no names of course!
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Old 05-06-2010, 02:56 PM   #2
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This might not strictly adhere to what you've asked SuperO but this is how I weed out the rubbish:
Men who ask for money
Men who want to know if you can give birth to several million babies *shudders*
Men who call you sweety, baby and never by your name - they haven't actually read anything you've written and you are one of thousands
Men obsessed with body parts - yuck. Men who feel they can ask for pics of your boobs, ass, arms, tummy, thighs - whatever - big no no
Men who keep asking if you look like so and so from X website. Really bitch, really??!!!
Men who have pics of celebrities as their profile pics - sooooo embarrasing!
Men who write in sms talk all the time
Men who say things like swag and shorty all the time ahahaha!
I've yet to be lured in by a married dude so sorry, haven't picked up any warning signs on that, but the total loser warning signs are above!!
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Old 05-06-2010, 04:39 PM   #3
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men who are newly "sepperated" or in complicated relationships


take your time get to know someone over a few months rather than meeting them 5 minutes later if they are not being genuine you will see the cracks start to show at some point and there will be inconsistencies

TRUST YOUR GUT!! Cannot stress this enough if you get an uneasy feeling just from their pic or talking to them stop talking to them that feeling is there for a reason!

Any guy who asks to see you naked or if you have naked pics really is only after one thing

A guy who comes on very strong from the start is often to good to be true

when your comfortable with someone, video chat where you can (clothed lol and not for cyber sex) but because a good way to get to know someone is to watch their face and expressions while they talk

and again take your time if it is something worth having it is worth the wait and if its not then you will have wasted a little time making a new friend
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Old 05-06-2010, 05:15 PM   #4
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1.men who don't want to give you their number but want yours.
1b. men who call you and their number comes up private or unknown

2. men who want you to come visit them first (means they have no car)

3. when you call you always get his vmail and then he calls you back (means he is married...I've experienced this firsthand)

4. the "only" pics they have of themselves are like 10 years old.

5. men who want to come to your place but never go out anywhere (major closet case)
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Old 05-06-2010, 05:18 PM   #5
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I love the men who claim to have an "open" marriage or seperated but living together till the house sells, but refuse to give you their wife's number for verification. Which is always very weird cause the wife is always dating someone else.
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Old 05-06-2010, 06:54 PM   #6
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He says he's a vegetarian yet you find empty salami packets under his bed.
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Old 05-06-2010, 07:20 PM   #7
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hey odalisque long time no see! I'd just like to say my female friends tell me about stuff like this all the time, but it DOES go both ways, ive met quite a few women, some from this forum, who never tell yout heyre married or have a bf until theyre done screwing around with you. Just saying lol.

josh

p.s. hope u remember me lol, im the artist from toronto XD
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Old 05-06-2010, 07:41 PM   #8
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Men who can't be so bothered to contact you by writing a message, but instead use those annoying "flirt" and "Wink" automated messages. "LazyA sent you a kiss", "Mr.B thinks you're hot."

Men whose username is a sexual reference. "dckslmmr", "longandthick4U"

Men who ask a question, to which you reply with a thoughtful two paragraph answer, and his entire response to yours is monosyllabic.

Men from another country, hell another hemisphere, whose first contact with you is to let you know they will be in your city on X date and wants to know can they get together with you.

Men who don't even try to write in full sentences.

Men who spell your name/username incorrectly several times when it is written RIGHT THERE in front of them.

Men who can't be bothered to use a spell/grammar check.
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Old 05-06-2010, 07:56 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by siegfried563 View Post
hey odalisque long time no see! I'd just like to say my female friends tell me about stuff like this all the time, but it DOES go both ways, ive met quite a few women, some from this forum, who never tell yout heyre married or have a bf until theyre done screwing around with you. Just saying lol.

josh

p.s. hope u remember me lol, im the artist from toronto XD
ltns! good to cyu again. yeah it does go both ways. we know that. but we have no way of knowing about that for the most part unless we are dating women. i'm sure our lesbian and bi sisters will clue us in. we're not trying to bash anyone, just protect each other. i think the FA thread should carry the same thing for the newbies to this stuff. it doesn't hurt to have a idea of what to look for. ty for taking a look in.
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Old 05-06-2010, 07:59 PM   #10
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Default A few I have noticed.

Has roommate(s) so hanging out at his place is not possible "no privacy"-closeted or attached

Idea of a first date is watching a movie at your place
(this is an obvious booty call) but could also mean he is closeted or
cheap.

Wants to talk about sex right off... yes you will naturally get to that eventually but it seems once it goes there.. it usually stays there.

Disappears abruptly during IM conversations.... girlfriend/wife around or just rude!



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Old 05-06-2010, 11:46 PM   #11
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I've found a good rule of thumb is to basically ignore anyone that isn't forthcoming with information. It doesn't have to be super specific, but if he's overly vague about where he lives, what he does for a living (or generally in my case.. what his major is/where he goes to school), etc. it's just suspicious.. it usually means he's lying or doesn't actually give a shit about getting to know you and just wants sex.. which is cool if that's what you're looking for but super uncool if it's not.

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Old 05-06-2010, 11:53 PM   #12
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It's important that they're open and offer information. They should be coming to see you.

I will say I drove to meet a number of guys...could have been dangerous. So be careful I was lucky.
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Old 05-07-2010, 12:32 AM   #13
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is why I always think meeting in a public place is a good option, and letting at least two people know where you are going and having your mobile on as well!!
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Old 05-07-2010, 03:46 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dolce View Post
He says he's a vegetarian yet you find empty salami packets under his bed.
It's possible he didn't bring that salami to bed to eat it. Just sayin.'
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Old 05-07-2010, 05:19 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tina View Post
It's possible he didn't bring that salami to bed to eat it. Just sayin.'
HAHAHAHAHAH! But seriously eeewwwww!
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Old 05-07-2010, 09:10 AM   #16
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It's possible he didn't bring that salami to bed to eat it. Just sayin.'
You're being naughty! LOL This whole thread should now be moved to the sexuality forum.
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Old 05-07-2010, 02:37 PM   #17
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He says he's a vegetarian yet you find empty salami packets under his bed.
That's got to be the wurst.
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Old 05-07-2010, 02:40 PM   #18
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That's got to be the wurst.
oh no you didn't!
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Old 05-07-2010, 07:02 PM   #19
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If his story is ALWAYS changing... never a good sign.
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Old 05-07-2010, 08:49 PM   #20
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That's got to be the wurst.
Don't be such a brat..
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Old 05-07-2010, 10:39 PM   #21
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Great thread.
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Old 05-08-2010, 01:10 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Feelgood View Post
That's got to be the wurst.
Quote:
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Don't be such a brat..
You two are a couple of sausages!
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Old 05-08-2010, 02:43 PM   #23
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Quote:
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You two are a couple of sausages!
sure, but there can only be one weiner in this battle of wits.....
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Old 05-08-2010, 04:15 PM   #24
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sure, but there can only be one weiner in this battle of wits.....
I'm the wiener! You can't outwit the wiener!
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Old 05-08-2010, 04:20 PM   #25
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If he's always saying he's 'in transition' or that he's 'about to get a divorce.'

A few years ago I was contacted by a guy through an ad. His profile stated he was 'in transition' (moving away from home). Note that he was in his 30s. Anyway, that shit was 'just around the corner' according to him.

Only, I was speaking with a woman at Dims and we realized we'd been approached by the same guy. For her, it was 2 years before. And his profile read 'in transition' then, too.

'Just around the corner' my fat, black ass.

Oh, and there's a Dims guy who was telling me he'd 'be divorced within 3 months, promise!' and that was...2 years ago? More? He was staying for his 2 little boys, but I think they're probably about 30 right now. haha.

There seems to be something about me not being at all interested in these guys that makes them lie all the more. You'd think it'd be the other way around, but I think that they're lying to themselves most of all, and so it doesn't matter if you are into them or not.
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