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Old 12-30-2010, 09:56 AM   #101
1love_emily
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Originally Posted by spiritangel View Post
So how do you cope with the holliday season as a single girl?.
I plan on coping by getting off my butt and being with my friends. I'm tired of looking at everyone as a potential date. I just want to be friends with everyone right now. I'm moving away in 8 months anyway
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:16 AM   #102
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I admit...I am terrified to go to a place and sit down and eat alone. I think i've only done it 3 times in my adult life. Once in Tampa while I was there for my job at the time, just this most recent July went to Cafe Tu Tu Tango while at a work conference, and then I went to Panera a couple months ago and waited for my classmate to show up and he never did.

I guess i just dont like going out and eating alone because i feel like people are staring and commenting. Granted...that's probably just bad self esteem and paranoia issues, but still hard to overcome
try taking a book if you feel self conscious at first
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Old 01-10-2011, 01:42 PM   #103
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I started going to eat alone in public when I was about 15. It was scary as hell for a long time, enough that I'd sometimes be on the verge of a panic attack, but like other people have suggested taking a book does help. Even if you only use it as a prop in a moment you're not comfortable in, always have one on hand.

It gets easier if you make a habit of searching for other lone diners and assess your own impression of them - do you care that they're alone, or what they look like sitting there? If not, then it's safe to say others will feel the same when they glance at you.
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Old 01-10-2011, 06:40 PM   #104
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Bringing something to do is a great idea! I toodle around on my iphone whenever I'm stuck by myself away from home, but particularly when I'm alone at a restaurant. Even after 17+ years of eating out regularly by myself, it's still not something I really LOVE doing.

My issue is more of a boredom issue than anything else, though. Since I'm an extrovert, a meal out, alone, always strikes me as a wasted opportunity for togetherness and conversation. Eating is such a social thing in pretty much every culture that it's sometimes hard to imagine bothering to head to a restaurant or even cook a nice meal at home without other people to share it with.


***

As for the holiday issue, my solution is family. I know that a lot of first world, postmodern families aren't like mine, but it's traditional in my family/culture to spend new year's eve with folks and family friends rather than with a date. I get that we're not just old-country ethnic - we're also WEIRD. Like seriously. But it's fun.

This year, which was fairly typical, we all went to our favorite Chinese restaurant. Then, we hung out at home watching Back to the Future 3 (mainly because my brother recently rebuilt the boiler on the locomotive used in the film, but also because it's awesome) while my brother, his fiancee, and his best friend Paul worked on my dad's live steam engine and shot blanks from black powder pistols. At midnight, we make as much noise as possible - my dad and brother play music on really obnoxious-sounding Greek reed instruments (karamoudzes) while my mother drums. Some years we play cards and bake new year's bread (vasilopita, St. Basil's bread).

At any rate, it's the shit we do. It's not just a Plan B, it's something I miss if I skip a year.
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