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Old 10-08-2010, 12:46 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by SuperSizedAngie View Post
I feel myself growing bigger, day by day. Right now I'm gaining at a rate of about a pound every two-three days, a much faster rate than even six months ago. Over the past year and a half, I've gained more than 65lbs, and I don't know when it's going to stop.

In the past two weeks, I've busted out of five brand new bras. I no longer really fit into the largest size of clothes that plus-size stores carry, and it's starting to look a little ridiculous when I leave the house wearing clothes that just plain don't fit anymore.

I feel myself becoming more than a sum of my parts, growing into the fat goddess I was meant to be. I keep stuffing myself silly every night, wondering what I'll look like in another 50lbs. I feel like a flower, blossoming.

My friends from high school don't understand. They hadn't seen me in 65lbs, and they can't understand how I can be content with my new weight. They certainly don't understand how I can plan on gaining more. I don't know what to tell them anymore, and I'm quickly learning that I don't have to justify my weight gain to anyone.

I'll have reached my first goal in another 15lbs or so..... but I'm not sure if I'll stop. Or even if I want to stop. Beyond there, there's the question of "could I stop?" Another part of me wonders if having weight gain goals at just 19 is normal. I know I have my entire life ahead of me, many many years where I can keep gaining. I'm so in love with gaining already that it's difficult to realize that I probably won't be able to keep growing my whole life, certainly not at this rate, despite my desire to. I'll be turning twenty in just a few months, and it shocks me to realize that I might be 450lb by that time. When I was little, this isn't quite where I thought I'd be, and I certainly never imagined I'd be embracing it in such an open manner.

At over 400lbs now, it's hard to tell. It's hard to gauge where things will go from here.... But I'm excited to see what big, beautiful promises the future holds as I become who I was meant to be!

I am not sure how to put this. I am awed by how much you are expressing your love for yourself. That is the most important thing a person could do and at this point in time in my life, I am not at that point. I, myself, do not want to gain. I want to lose. Since I am at the weight/size I am, I truly do want to love myself for who I am and now what I look like. If that makes any sense. I really am one of those people who does not understand why people would want to gain so much weight. I wish you the best of luck though!
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Old 10-08-2010, 01:50 AM   #27
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I am not sure how to put this. I am awed by how much you are expressing your love for yourself. That is the most important thing a person could do and at this point in time in my life, I am not at that point. I, myself, do not want to gain. I want to lose. Since I am at the weight/size I am, I truly do want to love myself for who I am and now what I look like. If that makes any sense. I really am one of those people who does not understand why people would want to gain so much weight. I wish you the best of luck though!


That's very understandable. It's difficult to love yourself when you don't think that anyone else could find you attractive. Society, both as a whole and as individuals, does put a lot of pressure on us to believe that our bodies are not beautiful or worthy of love and affection. I used to believe that about myself. I honestly used to hate myself and the way I looked... Those days feel like ages ago and like yesterday, all at the same time. The feelings were with me for so long, and it had such far reaching, devastating effects on my life.

For me, it changed a few years ago, when I left for college. It was by NO means an easy process, nor a short one. It took a lot of time and a lot of self-affirmation, but in the end it was worth it. It may be difficult for you to believe how beautiful you are. It was for me at first too. Every woman should feel beautiful and special, and I'm saddened by those who aren't.

I'll be perfectly honest. I started out looking for the love and affection I never thought I'd get in all the wrong places. I'd always known there were chubby chasers, but I'd never really considered that there would be people who would ONLY want BBWs.

It was a wake-up call for me after I met my first few FAs who didn't know how to keep their hands off me. I saw first-hand that there were people out there who wouldn't just SETTLE for me. Instead, they preferred me.

After I turned 18, NurseVicki finally explained to me what it was that she did. Phone sex. I needed a job and thought I'd give it a try. I put up a few snapshots of my (then 340lbs) body. The response was overwhelming. My first phone call was with a very well educated engineer who spent thirty minutes gushing to me about how incredible my belly was.

Now... don't get me wrong. My self-esteem is not built on what I'm worth in any man's eyes. But it was hard to come away from that first phone call thinking about myself in the exact same way I had before. It really started the ball rolling for me... He pointed out things to me that I had never noticed about myself.

Things like how sexy my belly is when it jiggles. How round and smooth it is. How I'm fluffy and soft all over. How my belly makes a perfect pillow for my lovers to press their heads against as we cuddle...

Once I started being able to see what other people COULD find attractive about me, it wasn't long before I came to regard those traits as being extremely attractive and enjoyable as well. I had never before taken the time to appreciate my belly. To rub it and caress it and OWN it, with no shame. I was so caught up in hating myself before that, and it was only once I acknowledged the potential that was there that I could begin to love myself.

Before long, I started admiring a lot of the SS webmodels. I started out looking at girls my size and then just slowly found myself fascinated by bigger and bigger bodies.

My gaining weight started out as a private experiment... seeing if it was right for me. I didn't tell anyone when I first started gaining because it seemed like such an intensely private experience (and I'd never heard of erotic weight gain at that point in time, never heard of Dimensions, etc etc.) I didn't think at first that it would go as far as it has, or that I would enjoy it this much.

As every girl gets bigger and bigger, she takes on her own unique shape. The fat will settle differently on every girl, and I find it incredibly exciting to see how my body is changing. My butt is getting bigger, my hips are getting a little wider... and I'm starting to take on a decidedly curvier figure than I once had. When I first started I had small tits and pretty much no ass.... after 65lbs, it's changed a lot. I've filled out in ways I've never dreamed I would.


And I've made peace with myself. I made the decision that I will love me, even if nobody else does, because I'm far too awesome to live without someone loving me.

I wish you the best of luck in your journey as well. Most of all, I wish that you could find the same peace for yourself as I have.
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Old 10-08-2010, 01:51 AM   #28
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Now, that^ is an awesome piece of insight, right there...
Also - *hugs* for you Angie!
Thanks, jo!! *huuuugs!*
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Old 10-08-2010, 01:56 AM   #29
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Wow congrats. I wish I could have the confidence and self esteem that you have about your gain. I have such difficulty when people say things about the weight I've gained. I wish I could just push all their opinions aside and get on with it. It's amazing that you have. What an inspiration. Thanks for sharing. I hope one day I can be as certain and resolute as you.

I'm sorry that other people are reacting negatively to your weight gain. I know it's hard to deal with it. It's a bit easier on me than it would be for a lot of people, I think.... I'm not surrounded by my family, and all of the people that I currently spend time with I know through various kink groups or bbw groups. I've chosen to surround myself with the people that I know will support me, and I've stopped talking with those around me who have reacted negatively or who have tried to change me. Ridding myself of that negativity helped a lot. It reduced my stress levels immensely.
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Old 10-08-2010, 01:58 AM   #30
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Angie, you post was just such an awesomely open & honest one & a great insight into how you & other feel about gaining weight, thank you so much for that .

If I was single & 20 again (god that's a long time ago ) I'd be on your doorstep in a flash.


I've been having so many thoughts about it lately that it's hard NOT to share. A lot of what I've written here is stuff that I've been thinking about for a long time but never had a safe place to express it fully and without reservations.
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Old 10-08-2010, 01:59 AM   #31
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I have to say you have a very good attitude about it Angie. I hope you enjoy your gain. Some people will just never understand, but you can't help that, so just carry on.

Thanks so much! So far I'm enjoying it immensely!
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Old 10-08-2010, 06:47 AM   #32
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I'm very happy for you! ^_^ Life, after all, is the pursuit of happiness and it seems you've found your niche in it. Life is short and you should live it! You have my support in what ever would make you happy. Also, from your picture i can tell that any man to have you as their girl is a very lucky man. You're a very beautiful woman that seems to be blossoming with inner and outer beauty, and one can definitly see that you LOVE to gain. ^_^ Congrats!
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Old 10-08-2010, 09:15 AM   #33
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Originally Posted by SuperSizedAngie View Post
That's very understandable. It's difficult to love yourself when you don't think that anyone else could find you attractive. Society, both as a whole and as individuals, does put a lot of pressure on us to believe that our bodies are not beautiful or worthy of love and affection. I used to believe that about myself. I honestly used to hate myself and the way I looked... Those days feel like ages ago and like yesterday, all at the same time. The feelings were with me for so long, and it had such far reaching, devastating effects on my life.

For me, it changed a few years ago, when I left for college. It was by NO means an easy process, nor a short one. It took a lot of time and a lot of self-affirmation, but in the end it was worth it. It may be difficult for you to believe how beautiful you are. It was for me at first too. Every woman should feel beautiful and special, and I'm saddened by those who aren't.

I'll be perfectly honest. I started out looking for the love and affection I never thought I'd get in all the wrong places. I'd always known there were chubby chasers, but I'd never really considered that there would be people who would ONLY want BBWs.

It was a wake-up call for me after I met my first few FAs who didn't know how to keep their hands off me. I saw first-hand that there were people out there who wouldn't just SETTLE for me. Instead, they preferred me.

After I turned 18, NurseVicki finally explained to me what it was that she did. Phone sex. I needed a job and thought I'd give it a try. I put up a few snapshots of my (then 340lbs) body. The response was overwhelming. My first phone call was with a very well educated engineer who spent thirty minutes gushing to me about how incredible my belly was.

Now... don't get me wrong. My self-esteem is not built on what I'm worth in any man's eyes. But it was hard to come away from that first phone call thinking about myself in the exact same way I had before. It really started the ball rolling for me... He pointed out things to me that I had never noticed about myself.

Things like how sexy my belly is when it jiggles. How round and smooth it is. How I'm fluffy and soft all over. How my belly makes a perfect pillow for my lovers to press their heads against as we cuddle...

Once I started being able to see what other people COULD find attractive about me, it wasn't long before I came to regard those traits as being extremely attractive and enjoyable as well. I had never before taken the time to appreciate my belly. To rub it and caress it and OWN it, with no shame. I was so caught up in hating myself before that, and it was only once I acknowledged the potential that was there that I could begin to love myself.

Before long, I started admiring a lot of the SS webmodels. I started out looking at girls my size and then just slowly found myself fascinated by bigger and bigger bodies.

My gaining weight started out as a private experiment... seeing if it was right for me. I didn't tell anyone when I first started gaining because it seemed like such an intensely private experience (and I'd never heard of erotic weight gain at that point in time, never heard of Dimensions, etc etc.) I didn't think at first that it would go as far as it has, or that I would enjoy it this much.

As every girl gets bigger and bigger, she takes on her own unique shape. The fat will settle differently on every girl, and I find it incredibly exciting to see how my body is changing. My butt is getting bigger, my hips are getting a little wider... and I'm starting to take on a decidedly curvier figure than I once had. When I first started I had small tits and pretty much no ass.... after 65lbs, it's changed a lot. I've filled out in ways I've never dreamed I would.


And I've made peace with myself. I made the decision that I will love me, even if nobody else does, because I'm far too awesome to live without someone loving me.

I wish you the best of luck in your journey as well. Most of all, I wish that you could find the same peace for yourself as I have.
Great work, Angie, and a truly well written post!
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Old 10-14-2010, 09:26 PM   #34
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what a wonderfully candid and open post. I am sure that you have given confidence to others who enjoy the feeling of new fat on their bodies and to the process of growing bigger.
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Old 10-19-2010, 08:46 AM   #35
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Very well put Angie.
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Old 10-20-2010, 09:06 PM   #36
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You strike me as a very confident and lovely young woman, Angie...I barely remember being 20 (It was just another year of college, sleep deprivation and overwork for me).

You write beautifully and clearly know what you want for yourself. My best to you on your gaining journies.

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Old 10-24-2010, 07:00 AM   #37
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I'm very happy for you! ^_^ Life, after all, is the pursuit of happiness and it seems you've found your niche in it. Life is short and you should live it! You have my support in what ever would make you happy. Also, from your picture i can tell that any man to have you as their girl is a very lucky man. You're a very beautiful woman that seems to be blossoming with inner and outer beauty, and one can definitly see that you LOVE to gain. ^_^ Congrats!
Thanks, Takeshi I really am loving my gain. I went to try on a few pairs of shorts I bought about a month ago, and I can't fit into them! It made me giggle.
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Old 10-24-2010, 07:01 AM   #38
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Originally Posted by fatluvnguy View Post
what a wonderfully candid and open post. I am sure that you have given confidence to others who enjoy the feeling of new fat on their bodies and to the process of growing bigger.
It can definitely be a fun process, and I'm glad that I'm not the only one who enjoys it.
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Old 10-24-2010, 07:01 AM   #39
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Very well put Angie.


Thanks, Tracii.
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Old 10-25-2010, 07:05 AM   #40
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This thread is inspiring.

Angie, I love the way you succinctly put all of this about your new found love of yourself. It has just been the essence of beauty.

Anyway, what struck me about all of this is I can relate. Although I'm not into myself being the one who gains weight, I'm bestowed by similar circumstances. I haven't spoken to a lot of my high school friends in almost two years because of my failure to cope with my love of larger women. I mean, people know that I prefer much larger women, but I had felt ashamed of myself for quite some time, suppressing my "alternative" sexuality. Lol, I was crying manly tears reading this. The thread was hot, but it also enlightened. I've been severely depressed for quite some time, and this thread made me actually happy in a real way. It had helped me find something pure about what I fancy.

I feel like your writing saved me as it is a success story. I have been motivated.

Thank you so much.

I have questions, but it is way too early to write
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Old 10-25-2010, 12:53 PM   #41
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This thread is inspiring.

Angie, I love the way you succinctly put all of this about your new found love of yourself. It has just been the essence of beauty.

Anyway, what struck me about all of this is I can relate. Although I'm not into myself being the one who gains weight, I'm bestowed by similar circumstances. I haven't spoken to a lot of my high school friends in almost two years because of my failure to cope with my love of larger women. I mean, people know that I prefer much larger women, but I had felt ashamed of myself for quite some time, suppressing my "alternative" sexuality. Lol, I was crying manly tears reading this. The thread was hot, but it also enlightened. I've been severely depressed for quite some time, and this thread made me actually happy in a real way. It had helped me find something pure about what I fancy.

I feel like your writing saved me as it is a success story. I have been motivated.

Thank you so much.

I have questions, but it is way too early to write
I reached that point many years ago, though my journey isn't yet complete. Congratulations for reaching this milestone.
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Old 10-25-2010, 09:02 PM   #42
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Yeah.

lol, maybe I went a bit overboard in my post last night, but still, it really got me thinking. I donīt feel all that ashamed of my sexuality anymore =/ . Iīm at a loss in truly explaining, but it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my soul or something very similar. I do quite a bit of lurking here reading, but this thread resounded viscerally.

Well, whoever you are OP, you have really brightened my shit hah.

+mad reps.

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Old 10-27-2010, 11:51 AM   #43
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.....
And I've made peace with myself. I made the decision that I will love me, even if nobody else does, because I'm far too awesome to live without someone loving me. ......
I'm not a fan of that gaining or feeder thing but I believe I understand you very well.

Everybody has a dream. Some dreams relate to the human shape, some want a thin, very fat, chubby, athletic, tattooed, sun tanned or what ever else body. When I was a younger I wanted to have an athletic body, ok, I have muscles.
Since puberty I've been attracted to (very) fat girls. It's always been my desire to be the lover of a fat women. Every attempt to give up fat admiration had failed after a few days only. Then the game always started again, watching fat women in malls, looking for before-after pics, looking for magazines, watching fat porn, writing ads and all the rest of it. FAs needs a lot of time for that stuff.

One day in the 90th I decided to give-up that silly attempts giving up fat admiration. I got access to the internet and found that wonderful community of BBWs and FAs in the world. What I learned from these community was that it is normal to be attracted to fat women and there is nothing shameful. Fat people need love, too.

I am a fat admirer, that's what I am, I cannot and do not want to change it. Fat women turn me on, skinnies turn me off. To be honest to myself, in my case it's not a preference, it's a fetish. And I've learned to ignore people's idle talk about the objects of my desire or what they might think about my preference. It's my life and I'm the happiest when I live the life of a fat admirer.

So, I think I know what your feelings are. Some people are born to be fat, some are born to love fat. Maybe it's a heritage of the stone age (evolution), who knows?
Angie, great thread and posts, keep straight on.
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Old 10-29-2010, 12:21 PM   #44
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That is an amazing story angie and girls like you are the dream girls of guys like me :P
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Old 11-01-2010, 01:57 PM   #45
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This thread is inspiring.

Angie, I love the way you succinctly put all of this about your new found love of yourself. It has just been the essence of beauty.

Anyway, what struck me about all of this is I can relate. Although I'm not into myself being the one who gains weight, I'm bestowed by similar circumstances. I haven't spoken to a lot of my high school friends in almost two years because of my failure to cope with my love of larger women. I mean, people know that I prefer much larger women, but I had felt ashamed of myself for quite some time, suppressing my "alternative" sexuality. Lol, I was crying manly tears reading this. The thread was hot, but it also enlightened. I've been severely depressed for quite some time, and this thread made me actually happy in a real way. It had helped me find something pure about what I fancy.

I feel like your writing saved me as it is a success story. I have been motivated.

Thank you so much.

I have questions, but it is way too early to write
It's okay, I'm more than willing to answer your questions. It's not easy to put into words, sometimes, the journey or the feelings it evokes. But in those rare moments when I can, I feel like I can possibly finally let other people see it the same way I do, if only for a second. And that's important to me.
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Old 11-01-2010, 02:03 PM   #46
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I'm not a fan of that gaining or feeder thing but I believe I understand you very well.

Everybody has a dream. Some dreams relate to the human shape, some want a thin, very fat, chubby, athletic, tattooed, sun tanned or what ever else body. When I was a younger I wanted to have an athletic body, ok, I have muscles.
Since puberty I've been attracted to (very) fat girls. It's always been my desire to be the lover of a fat women. Every attempt to give up fat admiration had failed after a few days only. Then the game always started again, watching fat women in malls, looking for before-after pics, looking for magazines, watching fat porn, writing ads and all the rest of it. FAs needs a lot of time for that stuff.

One day in the 90th I decided to give-up that silly attempts giving up fat admiration. I got access to the internet and found that wonderful community of BBWs and FAs in the world. What I learned from these community was that it is normal to be attracted to fat women and there is nothing shameful. Fat people need love, too.

I am a fat admirer, that's what I am, I cannot and do not want to change it. Fat women turn me on, skinnies turn me off. To be honest to myself, in my case it's not a preference, it's a fetish. And I've learned to ignore people's idle talk about the objects of my desire or what they might think about my preference. It's my life and I'm the happiest when I live the life of a fat admirer.

So, I think I know what your feelings are. Some people are born to be fat, some are born to love fat. Maybe it's a heritage of the stone age (evolution), who knows?
Angie, great thread and posts, keep straight on.
You're right...... everyone was born with a different paths ahead of them. I don't believe that everything is pre-determined. Rather, I think that we are born with proclivities and natural affinities for certain ideas or activities, and as we grow, these are shaped and molded in ways unseen, until at some point we become an approximation of who we are. We each had different paths we could take, different choices to make, and it's the things that we've acted upon that define us in the end. I choose to be who I am. Now, I'm not saying that I'd be thin if I didn't choose to gain. I was ALWAYS big, over 300lbs in middle school, even. So I knew I'd most likely always be fat. My choice was whether or not I'd fight that, and hate myself all the way or if I'd embrace my body as it was. Eventually, I did, and from there I saw that I could either remain where I was or I could gain, and I chose to gain because it is what's right for me.

Thank you for your kind words, Blockierer.
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Old 11-23-2010, 08:28 PM   #47
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Here's a quick snapshot of me and my belly yesterday. I thought ya'll would like it
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Old 11-23-2010, 09:16 PM   #48
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Here's a quick snapshot of me and my belly yesterday. I thought ya'll would like it
wonderful keep up the great work
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Old 11-30-2010, 08:14 PM   #49
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wonderful keep up the great work
I agree...keep it up!
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Old 11-30-2010, 11:57 PM   #50
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Hubba-jubba-jeewow! =o

You have a lovely belly, and masterful posing. ^^
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