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Old 01-17-2011, 09:47 AM   #1
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Default "Gainless" Feederism

Maybe this has been discussed before, but I've been here a very long time and never seen a thread on it that I remember.

I've seen some people discuss this idea in passing. There are many reasons why we shouldn't act out fantasies, but are there ways in which the fantasies can be satisfied safely (like BDSM) without any actual weight gain?
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Old 01-17-2011, 12:05 PM   #2
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I'm sure that there are ways to add a feeding element without gaining. You could maybe overeat at one particular meal while eating normally at all others. You could do sexy food talk during a meal but not actually binge. It really depends on what aspect is the turn on.
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Old 07-17-2011, 04:14 PM   #3
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I'm sure that there are ways to add a feeding element without gaining. You could maybe overeat at one particular meal while eating normally at all others. You could do sexy food talk during a meal but not actually binge. It really depends on what aspect is the turn on.
But why bother - part of the pleasure is watching the gain, particularly as new chins and belly rolls appear - , and then feeling them
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Old 07-17-2011, 05:36 PM   #4
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But maybe their partner is opposed to gaining but is willing to engage in some sexy food talk. Not everyone has a partner who wants to gain but most couples do try to accommodate the desires of each other in ways that are mutually acceptable.
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Old 07-19-2011, 10:19 AM   #5
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I do not see why not. When I was first introduced to feederism, I was under the impression that the gain was not really the goal to the core. I just knew it was a niche some people have. Granted, it is not my thing, but I have no qualms with something that happens between two consenting adults.
If food in itself is an aphrodisiac for someone, why would weight gain even be necessary?
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Old 07-19-2011, 10:46 AM   #6
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But why bother - part of the pleasure is watching the gain, particularly as new chins and belly rolls appear - , and then feeling them
Food, feeding and eating can be erotic in itself without the result of gaining. Gaining doesn't have to be part of the pleasure at all - it doesn't even have to come into it.
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Old 07-19-2011, 11:09 AM   #7
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FYI, I prefer the term "Feedism".

But yeah, there are lots of ways to act it out without actual gain. Shirt stuffing and fantasy role-play works fine. Teasing about how fat somebody's getting, regardless of reality, can be a turn on.
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Old 07-19-2011, 12:31 PM   #8
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I think you adjust the feedee/feeder behavior this way to make it "gainless." Instead of making it about putting weight on your partner, you make the activity about maintaining your partner's current size. For the feeder, the activity could include a nerdish calculation of the exact calorie intake required to do this. And the feedee can tease the feeder by feigning bouts of low appetite that could jeapardize the feeder's calculations. And so on . . .
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Old 07-19-2011, 01:15 PM   #9
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Maybe this has been discussed before, but I've been here a very long time and never seen a thread on it that I remember.

I've seen some people discuss this idea in passing. There are many reasons why we shouldn't act out fantasies, but are there ways in which the fantasies can be satisfied safely (like BDSM) without any actual weight gain?
Depends on the person.

Fortunately, in my case, the answer is:
"oh hell to the yes! If my gf is already a BBW..."

Don't get me wrong. I'm lovin' teh girl gaining, but I've been in a couple of longterm LTRs (years) without gf gaining and we've had fuckin' mindblowing great sex... a bit of token feeding / tying up / role play / option on the fat talk... It can work really well for all concerned.

Your mileage may vary.
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Old 07-19-2011, 01:22 PM   #10
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But maybe their partner is opposed to gaining but is willing to engage in some sexy food talk. Not everyone has a partner who wants to gain but most couples do try to accommodate the desires of each other in ways that are mutually acceptable.
Exactly this!

And if your partner is up for doing this for you, and you then reciprocate by finding out their kinks and doing similar for them* = awesome.


(*assuming it's not seriously illegal nor squicky.)
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Old 07-22-2011, 03:24 PM   #11
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But why bother - part of the pleasure is watching the gain, particularly as new chins and belly rolls appear - , and then feeling them
I agree that this is part of the pleasure, but I'll give you some context. My current girlfriend is a marathoner, a very, very fast one. In fact, she is close to qualifying for the olympic trials.
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Old 07-22-2011, 03:29 PM   #12
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FYI, I prefer the term "Feedism".

But yeah, there are lots of ways to act it out without actual gain. Shirt stuffing and fantasy role-play works fine. Teasing about how fat somebody's getting, regardless of reality, can be a turn on.
As I'm the one who started this thread I guess I should "come back and report" so to speak. A couple of days ago my GF (who as I just mentioned is a serious marathoner and is 5'6" 108lbs) sent me a long email describing in detail...

1. How much she liked to eat
2. How she habitually ate so much that she would have to remove her pants halfway through the meal.
3. How she fantasizes about requiring two seats
etc,etc

It took a while, but I'm pretty sure that now she understands my turnon's and she is very, very clever about roleplay (and she'll do it when I'm not expecting).

I'm not trying to brag, it's surprising what people will agree to if you just ask.
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Old 07-22-2011, 03:33 PM   #13
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I think you adjust the feedee/feeder behavior this way to make it "gainless." Instead of making it about putting weight on your partner, you make the activity about maintaining your partner's current size. For the feeder, the activity could include a nerdish calculation of the exact calorie intake required to do this. And the feedee can tease the feeder by feigning bouts of low appetite that could jeapardize the feeder's calculations. And so on . . .
Another thing my gf does she weighs herself everyday and sends it to me in an email along with a list of everything that she ate that day. Even though she is concerned about keeping her weight low, sometimes she will gain a bit because she is recovering from a race. Then she might gain a few pounds and even that small amount can be a turn on for me.
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Old 07-22-2011, 03:41 PM   #14
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As I understand it, it's essential for marathoners to "carbo-load" the night / a few hours before the race... Just sayin'...
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Old 07-22-2011, 04:00 PM   #15
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In fact, I've gotten incredibly "lucky". For years I tried to find someone that would satisfy my "fetishes". I dated several awesome girls but it seemed like I would be impossible to satisfy because I would feel too guilty about the inevitable weight gain.

In December, I took a "chance" with a great girl that I knew who was a terrific match for me except that her lifestyle was the exact opposite of a feedee lifestyle. (ok that's not true, as feedee's can actually be pretty healthy). She was extremely slim and fit and had a degree in nutrition. She was probably the most health conscious person that I had ever known.

We date for a couple of months and I eventually decide that it is "time" to tell her about my fetishes. She is LDS and so did not want to have sex before marriage, thus it had never come up before. I told her that I had a very strong fetish and that I was pretty sure that I would not be capable of "normal sex". I made no ultimatums, I just said that I had never been able to get turned on without some kind of feeding/gaining element involved.

She laughed at me and said that she actually loves to eat and that she was always trying to limit how much she ate around me because she thought that I liked her not eating a lot. (I have a tendency to overcompensate so I would say things like "oh, I'm assuming you don't want dessert?".) She basically told me not to hold back around her and to just be myself.

She started by saying that she would try to gain some "muscle mass" and thus she would try to eat more. So we started tracking her weight and the amount that she ate. I also got her a body fat calculator. It turned out that with her work and exercise schedule, it was impossible for her to gain weight in a healthy manner so we put it on the back burner for a while. Additionally, I had been so conditioned by previous girlfriends that I didn't want to "push my luck" and keep bringing up my fetish (even though it is a huge part of who I am).

She eventually confronted me and said "James, don't censor yourself. Let's make this work!". So I started explicitly telling her my fantasies. I sent her stories from T.R. that I had read in high school. And through the discussion of these fantasies, she discovered that she was somewhat of a feeder herself!

She told me that her biggest turn on was watching a skinny guy (like myself) eat huge quantities (which I do) after exercising a lot (which I do frequently). After she came to that conclusion, she suddenly understood me a lot more. And here's the kicker.

She told me that she would gain weight in the "offseason", ie over the winter. She would gain in December and January and then try to lose the weight in february and march. Hopefully, she said, she would pick up some muscle mass in that time. She also said that she may enjoy it, she just didn't know.

So anyway, know we'll go running together and she'll point out girls who a little bit bigger than her and say "I can't wait until I look like that". Or we'll go out to eat together and we'll both be pointing out how much the other is eating and she'll talk wistfully about when she'll be able to eat "twice..three times as much". It IS FANTASTIC. And, at the same time, she is currently losing weight to prepare for her up coming marathon.

As for the tracking of the weight and body fat. It will prove incredible useful/sexy. Because we can set realistic goals and we can see exactly how much she will have to eat in order to get back to her original body fat. She has said already that her "ideal" weight is probably 117 (she is 107-108 right now) but that she would probably be willing to gain more than that 20+ pounds over the winter. I assured her that I would love the process and that even if she only gained 5, that I would feel like the luckiest guy in the world.

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Old 07-22-2011, 05:10 PM   #16
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Honestly I thought that was the distinction between feedism and gaining. I thought feedism was far more about eating/feeding than weight gain, while gaining is the opposite. These can intersect, of course, but I thought the whole eating as the erotic fixation vs. gaining weight as the erotic fixation is why we have two separate terms.
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Old 07-27-2011, 12:41 PM   #17
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It took a while, but I'm pretty sure that now she understands my turnon's and she is very, very clever about roleplay (and she'll do it when I'm not expecting).
I'm not trying to brag, it's surprising what people will agree to if you just ask.
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She eventually confronted me and said "James, don't censor yourself. Let's make this work!". So I started explicitly telling her my fantasies. I sent her stories from T.R. that I had read in high school. And through the discussion of these fantasies, she discovered that she was somewhat of a feeder herself!
I am over the moon for you especially since you said your fetish is a big part of you and you've found a girl whos basically perfect for you. I'm the same and my near 11-month gf is perfect for me both inside and out, I cannot image a future without her. And same as you, I took a shot at a girl who was on paper a perfect match for me (before her I'd never been out with someone with ALL the same interests lol), but at first glance she seemed a lil too quirky and not open to kinky ideas (boy was I wrong ).

Congrats on finding your perfect match, I hope you have a great life together. I've never heard of "Gainless" Feederism, but the best part of your fetish is that its all healthy haha. You sound really happy together

One thing I'd like to ask you, how do you feel knowing that this huge fetish has been a secret most of your life and now you have a girl who knows about it and it completely fine with it? I find it bizzare that I have shared ALL my normal to weird to extreme fetishes with my gf and shes fine with them and even embraced some.
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Old 07-28-2011, 07:09 PM   #18
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Honestly I thought that was the distinction between feedism and gaining. I thought feedism was far more about eating/feeding than weight gain, while gaining is the opposite. These can intersect, of course, but I thought the whole eating as the erotic fixation vs. gaining weight as the erotic fixation is why we have two separate terms.
Not quite in my case. My fantasies definitely involve weight gain. We are working on ways to act out weight gain fantasies without gaining weight. It is possible that she will actually gain some weight, but it will probably be pretty minimal.
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Old 07-28-2011, 07:18 PM   #19
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This is not the first girl that I've been open with my feelings about. It was back in 2004 that I started trying to explain my fantasies to my girlfriend at the time. It was pretty awkward for me, but I felt compelled to be honest. Before telling her, I had been trying to subtly get her to eat more and I was beginning to feel really guilty about it.

Anyway, there followed 7 years of dating women who basically thought I was nuts. I just wanted to share what has happened because I have been struggling with this for a while.

What I find amusing is that my current girlfriend probably weighs about half as much as the most recent girl I dated before that.
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