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Old 02-05-2011, 12:21 PM   #1
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Default If you like your body shout it out

That there are soooo many women fat or no who hate their bodies and who aren't size positive depresses me. All the fat women I've grown up with either hide their bodies or have had WLS and it makes me feel like the lone weirdo to know I like my body and don't have low self esteem. So I just need to know other women feel the way I do, so if you like your body and don't have low self esteem shout it out!
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Old 02-05-2011, 01:12 PM   #2
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I have my moments of displeasure like everyone else but I do like my body overall. When you hear me complain it's not about how my body doesn't fit, it's how the world won't bend obediently to my supreme will and preferences, damn them all to HELL!!! *shakes fist*

I'm making it work though.
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Old 02-05-2011, 01:16 PM   #3
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I have my days, but over all I like my body. And I havent heard any complaints from the boys I've played around with
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Old 02-05-2011, 01:18 PM   #4
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I have good days & bad days...

But even on my bad days, I love my legs and booty. Or, lack there of, haha. "Peek-a-boo" butt represent!
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Old 02-05-2011, 01:21 PM   #5
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I'm learning to love my body again. I'm really loving my bum these days, which is a first. I've always loved my boobs
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Old 02-05-2011, 03:19 PM   #6
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I love my body but FTR there are many people, men and women who have had WLS for life-saving and/or quality of life issues beyond a love for their body as is.

I had considered it myself and chose against it and the entire time, I did and still do love my body. An argument can also be made that it is exactly why they love their body that they made that difficult decision in the first place.

I think it's abundantly clear that I don't suffer from low self-esteem. LOL
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Old 02-05-2011, 03:28 PM   #7
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I'm not talking about having days where you hate some random body part or days when you don't feel like being girly, nor am I talking about wls to gain mobility or something like that. I just mean overall body self love as it is. My friends who had wls didn't have any co-morbids. They did it cause they just didn't like being fat and didn't have as much self esteem as they do in their smaller bodies. In other bbw sites I'm on it's the same story. There are a lot of women who apologize for being fat, talk about how much they know they should loose weight even tho they don't mention health issues. They are just mired in fat shame and It's just depressing and makes me want to scream. And sure being fat is hard, but not enough to shame oneself thin. At least not for me, and it would be good to know that there are other women who feel as I do.
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Old 02-05-2011, 03:33 PM   #8
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I'm not talking about having days where you hate some random body part or days when you don't feel like being girly, nor am I talking about wls to gain mobility or something like that. I just mean overall body self love as it is. My friends who had wls didn't have any co-morbids. They did it cause they just didn't like being fat and didn't have as much self esteem as they do in their smaller bodies. In other bbw sites I'm on it's the same story. There are a lot of women who apologize for being fat, talk about how much they know they should loose weight even tho they don't mention health issues. They are just mired in fat shame and It's just depressing and makes me want to scream. And sure being fat is hard, but not enough to shame oneself thin. At least not for me, and it would be good to know that there are other women who feel as I do.
I agree with you 100% and I know people exactly as you described too.

I don't disagree with the tone or expression of the thread but wanted instead to express my own thoughts on how WLS isn't always about appearances even though that may seem how it appears to outsiders.
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Old 02-05-2011, 03:46 PM   #9
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I agree with you 100% and I know people exactly as you described too.

I don't disagree with the tone or expression of the thread but wanted instead to express my own thoughts on how WLS isn't always about appearances even though that may how it appears to outsiders.
You're right, it isn't always and I don't begrudge anyone that right. In general I just wish there was less fat shame in the world. Know what I mean?
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Old 02-05-2011, 03:54 PM   #10
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You're right, it isn't always and I don't begrudge anyone that right. In general I just wish there was less fat shame in the world. Know what I mean?
Yes, I do.
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Old 02-05-2011, 04:06 PM   #11
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I've gone from the extremes of nearly losing mobility (a result of being so disconnected from my body) to loving and understanding how it actually works so very hard for me, to reconnect, loving it as its own functional entity, truly appreciating the gift it really is. Being conscious of the respect I must and don't always give it.

Fat or less fat, size is fluid, tangible etc my body is the unique ( and thankfully working) vessel that runs in conjuction with the rest of me.

I saw an ad for a aussie tv show called plastic fantastic last night and it had some stat that said something like 4/5 women don't like their bodies and would like to have surgery etc
Pretty crazy seeing that, had me thinking all that potential girlpower, all those mothers and potential mothers (who might raise kids with similar headfuckedness) are caught up in shitty "wish I could change" negative thoughts.
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Old 02-06-2011, 01:32 PM   #12
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Just like the other ladies in here said, I have my days, but I generally like my body. I'm just like Penguin, I love my 'girls'.
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Old 02-06-2011, 01:57 PM   #13
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I've gone from the extremes of nearly losing mobility (a result of being so disconnected from my body) to loving and understanding how it actually works so very hard for me, to reconnect, loving it as its own functional entity, truly appreciating the gift it really is. Being conscious of the respect I must and don't always give it.

Fat or less fat, size is fluid, tangible etc my body is the unique ( and thankfully working) vessel that runs in conjuction with the rest of me.

I saw an ad for a aussie tv show called plastic fantastic last night and it had some stat that said something like 4/5 women don't like their bodies and would like to have surgery etc
Pretty crazy seeing that, had me thinking all that potential girlpower, all those mothers and potential mothers (who might raise kids with similar headfuckedness) are caught up in shitty "wish I could change" negative thoughts.
....How could you be disconnected from your body if you have to live in it?
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Old 02-06-2011, 02:11 PM   #14
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I love my body.

I can also see how some women can be disconnected from their bodies even though they live in it. I think it's good to live in a state of awareness on all levels/areas of life. It's definitely an emotional/spiritual thing for me. Treating my body with respect is a huge deal - getting moving, clean eating, etc. are ways that I find a connectedness. In fact, because I hadn't had fried or very fattening foods in so long I immediately became ill when I ate some a couple weekends ago. Now, I knew before eating them that it might not sit quite right, but I didn't expect that I would have to literally RUN to the bathroom. For me, it's about being honest with myself and knowing what works and what doesn't. There's no room for denial or any of that.

If you are gaining to a point where your body is no longer working for you and your quality of life is decreasing (or you need multiple aids to just make it through the day) yet you ignore it (and thus continue to gain to extreme weights), that's disconnect to me. Sooner or later your body will quit working for you. Something is off and worth investigating further if it's gotten to a barely mobile, myriad of co-morbidities point. Like CP said, it can be seen as an act of love to make some much need changes, but you can't change what you don't acknowledge or confront.
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Old 02-06-2011, 02:32 PM   #15
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I love my body.

I can also see how some women can be disconnected from their bodies even though they live in it. I think it's good to live in a state of awareness on all levels/areas of life. It's definitely an emotional/spiritual thing for me. Treating my body with respect is a huge deal - getting moving, clean eating, etc. are ways that I find a connectedness. In fact, because I hadn't had fried or very fattening foods in so long I immediately became ill when I ate some a couple weekends ago. Now, I knew before eating them that it might not sit quite right, but I didn't expect that I would have to literally RUN to the bathroom. For me, it's about being honest with myself and knowing what works and what doesn't. There's no room for denial or any of that.

If you are gaining to a point where your body is no longer working for you and your quality of life is decreasing (or you need multiple aids to just make it through the day) yet you ignore it (and thus continue to gain to extreme weights), that's disconnect to me. Sooner or later your body will quit working for you. Something is off and worth investigating further if it's gotten to a barely mobile, myriad of co-morbidities point. Like CP said, it can be seen as an act of love to make some much need changes, but you can't change what you don't acknowledge or confront.
....has this been your experience? I mean, I still can't see how if someone is actively gaining that they'd still be disconnected from their bodies. I'd imagine that if someone is actively gaining they've be very much in tune with what their bodies are doing...
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Old 02-06-2011, 02:41 PM   #16
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....has this been your experience? I mean, I still can't see how if someone is actively gaining that they'd still be disconnected from their bodies. I'd imagine that if someone is actively gaining they've be very much in tune with what their bodies are doing...
A person can gain because of emotional eating and/or food addiction issues and still not be very in tune to what's going on. You're not typically in a healthy state of mind when you have those things going on. It has not been my personal experience and it doesn't have to be to hold water. A very good friend of mine has dealt and is currently dealing with this very issue. It's a vicious cycle for her because she's young, very fat and her health is starting to decline. And because her ailments and the fact that she can't live a normal life depress her, she copes by eating to numb pain/block out uncomfortable situations/feelings. So while she's actively gaining, it isn't because she *wants* to. She's not in the right frame of mind and for her (and people like her) there's a disconnect. She's not in a healthy emotional place at all.

To me, the mind and body are entirely too interrelated. I think they always have an effect on each other and by not recognizing that can be detrimental sometimes.
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Old 02-06-2011, 02:44 PM   #17
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This is a great thread Butch opened to discuss the mind/body disconnect:

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/fo...ad.php?t=79856
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Old 02-06-2011, 02:45 PM   #18
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This is a great thread Butch opened to discuss the mind/body disconnect:

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/fo...ad.php?t=79856
Thank you for posting the link, CP.
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Old 02-06-2011, 03:45 PM   #19
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I absolutely LOVE my body.Only thing I would change SLIGHTLY is my shape.A little more curve never hurt anyone lol.Other than that.Im perfect!
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Old 02-06-2011, 03:48 PM   #20
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....How could you be disconnected from your body if you have to live in it?
I wasn't living, I was existing.
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Old 02-06-2011, 04:03 PM   #21
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I wasn't living, I was existing.
I'm reminded of something I read somewhere that still resonates within me:

'Surviving isn't living anymore than drowning is swimming.'
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Old 02-06-2011, 05:00 PM   #22
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A person can gain because of emotional eating and/or food addiction issues and still not be very in tune to what's going on. You're not typically in a healthy state of mind when you have those things going on. It has not been my personal experience and it doesn't have to be to hold water. A very good friend of mine has dealt and is currently dealing with this very issue. It's a vicious cycle for her because she's young, very fat and her health is starting to decline. And because her ailments and the fact that she can't live a normal life depress her, she copes by eating to numb pain/block out uncomfortable situations/feelings. So while she's actively gaining, it isn't because she *wants* to. She's not in the right frame of mind and for her (and people like her) there's a disconnect. She's not in a healthy emotional place at all.

To me, the mind and body are entirely too interrelated. I think they always have an effect on each other and by not recognizing that can be detrimental sometimes.
Oh I see. I prefer to deal with my emotions directly so these sorts of issues are foreign to me, and I'm not an emotional eater. I would never have thought emotional eating would have anything to do with some sort of disassociation from ones body.
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Old 02-06-2011, 05:42 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by olwen View Post
Oh I see. I prefer to deal with my emotions directly so these sorts of issues are foreign to me, and I'm not an emotional eater. I would never have thought emotional eating would have anything to do with some sort of disassociation from ones body.
It's not that my friend *prefers* to deal with her emotions that way. It's an unhealthy coping mechanism - we all have them. Her poison just happens to be stuffing down her pain. It's just another part of the mind/body disconnect and it's dysfunction. Emotional eating is waaaay more common than you'd think and a lot is rooted in not tapping into an awareness.

Another thing to take a peak at on the issue of mind/body issues is the book Women, Food and God by Geneen Roth. It's an eye opening and amazing read. It will clue you in even more re: this. To her, how/what we eat and our relationship with food has everything to do with how we truly feel about ourselves and being alive. She has other books, but this is the one I was drawn to and definitely made me think.
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Old 02-06-2011, 05:52 PM   #24
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I too read the book and it really made me think.

Olwen, re the emotional feeding aspect--when women stuff or suppress emotion and feelings, they often comfort themselves by stuffing with food instead. When I acknowledged that it was something I was doing and food had become more than something enjoyable, I was better equipped to make healthier decisions in my life. YMMV

I can love food and eating and my body, and feel zero guilt. I consider knowledge like this a tool to enhance my life.
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Old 02-06-2011, 05:55 PM   #25
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I am direct with everything and always have been up until a situation left me with a hectic case of ptsd that kept me within my head and then escaping that too.
I don't think that it wasn't that I didn't love my body, I just wasn't conscious of it or much at all with anything goin on around me even.

The mind is unreal with what it does to try & protect and heal, insulate etc
Thats why in the other thread where we were talking I mentioned the psychological issues regarding ones fatness needing to be addressed. If it isn't a medical issue and it isn't just caloric intake coupled with increased activity, then it's in yr head for the most part, that is if you honestly want change.
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