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Old 03-15-2011, 01:03 PM   #26
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I *heart* you guys.

I've come to the conclusion that Dims predominately attracts FAs who are geared to somewhat bigger BBWs, and that's great and I'm not complaining. Other websites seem to be more "plumper"-centric, to use a term I don't really care for, but I don't frequent them as they seem to offer mostly wank-fodder and little actual discussion of SA issues.

So it's sort of a question of where does one belong -- and I feel like I belong here, for so many reasons, even if I sometimes wonder whether I hold any appeal for most FAs. Even if I don't, I still (mostly) love this community.

P.S. hoonder pics forthcoming (by invitation only).

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Old 03-15-2011, 01:10 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by LalaCity View Post
I *heart* you guys.

I've come to the conclusion that Dims predominately attracts FAs who are geared to somewhat bigger BBWs, and that's great and I'm not complaining. Other websites seem to be more "plumper"-centric, to use a term I don't really care for, but I don't frequent them as they seem to offer mostly wank-fodder and little actual discussion of SA issues.

So it's sort of a question of where does one belong -- and I feel like I belong here, for so many reasons, even if I sometimes question whether I hold any appeal for most FAs. Even if I don't, I still (mostly) love this community.
Who cares what THEY think? I think you're hawt (rawr) and yes ... OK .. I'm female and middle-aged and married and not in your demographic and frankly wouldn't be worthy even if I was. The fact remains, though, that I've made this about me (in your thread!) and I really only care what I think of you anyway. Which is that I wouldn't care what you look like anyway coz I don't want to have sex with you but damn if you aren't clever and hilarious and literate and you almost never pound out nonsensical run-on sentences that go nowhere. Like some people who shall remain nameless.
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Old 03-15-2011, 01:14 PM   #28
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Well based on very blurry pictures you are very sexy. Any bigger girl lover would be and should be extremely attracted to you. I would be anyway. I didn't even know I like big girls until ine day messing around on the internet I stumbled onto BBW websites and I WAS HOOKED. I was instantly turned into a big time BBW fan to the point I married a BBW 2 years ago. Just keep up the faith and some lucky guy will finally see the beauty that is you.
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Old 03-15-2011, 01:19 PM   #29
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Who cares what THEY think? I think you're hawt (rawr) and yes ... OK .. I'm female and middle-aged and married and not in your demographic and frankly wouldn't be worthy even if I was. The fact remains, though, that I've made this about me (in your thread!) and I really only care what I think of you anyway. Which is that I wouldn't care what you look like anyway coz I don't want to have sex with you but damn if you aren't clever and hilarious and literate and you almost never pound out nonsensical run-on sentences that go nowhere. Like some people who shall remain nameless.
Oh, but I do care what you think. In fact, this thread was concocted entirely with the ulterior motive of luring you her to milk you for compliments. And clearly, it worked!


Oh, and likewise to all that brilliant and articulate stuff.
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Old 03-15-2011, 01:20 PM   #30
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Well based on very blurry pictures you are very sexy. Any bigger girl lover would be and should be extremely attracted to you. I would be anyway. I didn't even know I like big girls until ine day messing around on the internet I stumbled onto BBW websites and I WAS HOOKED. I was instantly turned into a big time BBW fan to the point I married a BBW 2 years ago. Just keep up the faith and some lucky guy will finally see the beauty that is you.
Thanks, Johnny. It's nice to hear that you think so.
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Old 03-15-2011, 02:32 PM   #31
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Originally Posted by LalaCity View Post
I *heart* you guys.

I've come to the conclusion that Dims predominately attracts FAs who are geared to somewhat bigger BBWs, and that's great and I'm not complaining. Other websites seem to be more "plumper"-centric, to use a term I don't really care for, but I don't frequent them as they seem to offer mostly wank-fodder and little actual discussion of SA issues.
.
I think (and have been told this by many) this too. Dims is skewed to SSBBWs/very large women. It's no wonder you're getting that vibe.

Interestingly, some larger women have said many times that they feel ...disenfranchised, let's say, at some events, in the dating world, etc.

And I think all of those truths can co-exist. People (men) come to Dims for the fantasy, to interact with very large women, to praise them, to gawk at them, to see them half naked, etc. But in reality, it may be that the smaller fat women get the action, for whatever reason.

So everyone is right! Which means it sucks equally for everyone! yay....BOOOOO!
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Old 03-15-2011, 02:36 PM   #32
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I forgot to mention: I'm pretty certain that for every guy who has strong body type preferences, there is at least one if not several whose attitude's could be summed up more by this extract from the song "Looking for Girls" by The Pursuit of Happiness (one of my favorite cheerfully cynical bands). Key point is bolded.

"Looking for someone I can play with
I don't care if she's skinny
I don't care if she's fat
As long as she goes for boys like me
'Cause I like them like that
"

(listen to the whole thing on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzaJNQzFMws

Personally I'd guess that guys are probably more apt to not approach you because they don't think they are in your league as an overall person (i.e. that you don't go for guys like them) than because of your size.
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Old 03-15-2011, 02:54 PM   #33
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Lala. you are still my Queen. Also, clearly gorgeous.

Dims is a funny place.
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Old 03-15-2011, 03:00 PM   #34
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Originally Posted by LalaCity View Post
I *heart* you guys.

I've come to the conclusion that Dims predominately attracts FAs who are geared to somewhat bigger BBWs, and that's great and I'm not complaining. Other websites seem to be more "plumper"-centric, to use a term I don't really care for, but I don't frequent them as they seem to offer mostly wank-fodder and little actual discussion of SA issues.

So it's sort of a question of where does one belong -- and I feel like I belong here, for so many reasons, even if I sometimes wonder whether I hold any appeal for most FAs. Even if I don't, I still (mostly) love this community.

P.S. hoonder pics forthcoming (by invitation only).

I have noticed this occurrence as well on Dims. I've been to other bbw websites, primarily catering to a certain shape of 'plumper' and the discussions there turn me off too, solely wank fodder.
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Old 03-19-2011, 10:06 PM   #35
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I think I'm a pretty genuine FA and a short guy, and though I am married to a tall supersize woman, I've seen plenty of short plus-size gals who have turned me on quite well.
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Old 03-20-2011, 01:38 AM   #36
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lala, you're truly beautiful voluptuous woman..
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Old 03-29-2011, 12:46 PM   #37
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woah...betty page, get outta the way.
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Old 03-29-2011, 12:58 PM   #38
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Oh, but I do care what you think. In fact, this thread was concocted entirely with the ulterior motive of luring you her to milk you for compliments. And clearly, it worked!


Oh, and likewise to all that brilliant and articulate stuff.
Still, if this is an issue for you, why do you use avatars that are so clearly not you and are certain to divert attention?
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Old 03-30-2011, 12:03 PM   #39
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What does avatar choice have to do with anything?
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Old 03-30-2011, 01:21 PM   #40
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1) On a personal note, my wife is a size 16, was a 12 when we met, was a 20 at her heaviest....has been stunning (at least to me!) at all of those sizes.

2) On a general note, I know a fair number of guys who would say something along the lines of "I like curvy girls" "I like 'em with plenty of T and A" "I like a little meat on bone, you know?" I know very few who might prefer larger sizes, and none other who have stated a preference for larger sizes. So from what I've seen, there are probably more who would like sizes like yours than larger sizes.

3) I think liking your own body, in a sexual way, can be a big part of selling it to a partner, but I guess that can be a bit of a chicken and egg situation, so I'm not saying it is at all easy to achieve.

4) In the long run everyone's bodies sag, wrinkle, get creaky, etc. In the long run a relationship has to be about wanting to be with the person far more than the body. The body may get you talking in the first place, but I think it should be forgiveable that they don't think you are the absolute hottest thing on 2 legs, provided they keep any other thoughts to themselves, make you feel adored, and cleave only unto you.
I second this post entirely.

Especially No. 3. No matter your height, weight, age, gender, sexual preference, if you don't enjoy something (preferably several somethings) about your body, your partner will pick up on that and, eventually, might find you amazingly hot to look at, not so hot to deal with. I know maintaining that self-esteem in the bombardment of the mass media ain't easy, but part of the reason I know is I was on the other end -- relentlessly made fun of for being terribly skinny, almost the Before picture in a Charles Atlas ad. I eventually learned, a) my body could do certain things more bulkily muscled bodies couldn't and they felt good so maybe it wasn't all that bad and b) there were women who found my body attractive and when they told me so, I should stop expressing doubt or pooh-poohing them.
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Old 03-31-2011, 08:13 PM   #41
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I thought the first post was terribly interesting. I hope I can articulate a cogent response despite having a headache.

First of all, as for FAís developing a size fetish: Iíve known that Iím an FA since I was about eleven (IĎm 28 now), and I have never noticed anything like that at all. And in my personal experience, thatís not the way that things work in a relationship. When Iíve dated fat or moderately fat women, Iíve never found myself looking for an ďupgradeĒ in size. (The one exception, if you can call it that, is that dating a woman on a rigorous diet is pretty unpleasant; in that scenario I end up missing the parts of the woman that have shrunken and the fat that has disappeared)

In a sense, a chubby person satisfies the definition of the word fat as much as a morbidly obese person. I personally find pictures of Carol Yager (the fattest woman ever) beautiful, but if Iím dating a fat woman Iím not always on the lookout for a Carol Yager.

And why is a chubby woman not fat enough? The fact of the matter is that most people arenít rail-thin or morbidly obese, and most of the women I find attractive arenít rail-thin or morbidly obese. Itís more about the woman herself, and keeping in mind the fact that most people gain and lose weight all the time.

Iím not saying youíre chubby or fat or morbidly obese, only that there is no ďbetween the cracks.Ē
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Old 04-02-2011, 01:45 AM   #42
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Lala, I think the answer is simple. Liking a woman who is your size is still close enough to "mainstream" preferences that most guys probably don't see a reason to seek out additional resources to help them with coming to terms with it. Most probably don't even know there are terms like BBW and FA. You have many, many guys out in the "real world" looking for a woman like you.
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Old 04-02-2011, 05:03 PM   #43
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honey what do YOU actually want? personally, i think you're beautiful exactly the way you are. if you want to be different i think you'll be gorgeous that way too. but really, its not about what other people like its what you like. don't let someone else's preference warp who you really are inside and what you really want to be.
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Old 04-02-2011, 07:17 PM   #44
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I'm w/ Jon Blaze on the wide spectrum of BBW preference. My current gf is 5'4 and weighs a really squishy 185, about a size 14, and I find her irresistible. Also I have dated girls in the 275-300 range. Sexy is sexy, and for me, like Jon, the shape and softness is way more important than size in itself. Altho I see your point about feeling too big AND too small at the same time, don't worry, be who you are, and you will get there. There are a ton of guys who are into plump, curvy or "juicy goodness" (how I describe my girl, and she loves it).
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Old 04-03-2011, 07:38 AM   #45
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I have a quick question that has no real answer.

Where is the line drawn between BBW and SSBBW? Because I see people who say they are SS when they are at like 315 pounds... but I consider myself just BB, and I'm at 295? That's only a 20 lb difference...

Does it have to do with height? I mean, I am 5'11" and such.
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Old 04-03-2011, 08:31 AM   #46
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I have a quick question that has no real answer.

Where is the line drawn between BBW and SSBBW? Because I see people who say they are SS when they are at like 315 pounds... but I consider myself just BB, and I'm at 295? That's only a 20 lb difference...

Does it have to do with height? I mean, I am 5'11" and such.
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Old 04-03-2011, 09:59 AM   #47
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I have a quick question that has no real answer.

Where is the line drawn between BBW and SSBBW? Because I see people who say they are SS when they are at like 315 pounds... but I consider myself just BB, and I'm at 295? That's only a 20 lb difference...

Does it have to do with height? I mean, I am 5'11" and such.
As Saoirse said, it's totally subjective. Example: at 5' 11" you carry weight much differently than you would if you were a foot shorter. Therefore, the number doesn't matter much. If you don't think you are an SSBBW, then you aren't. For the record I concur, but my opinion doesn't really matter.
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Old 04-03-2011, 01:17 PM   #48
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General guideline is when you can't buy clothes in a brick-and-mortar store anymore... but yeah, definitions vary widely.
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Old 04-03-2011, 03:36 PM   #49
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I'm about a size or two bigger and a couple inches shorter than you.

If I were you I wouldn't give a lot of credence to what FAs want or don't want/find attractive. I think a genuine guy who is sure of himself just wants a woman who embraces her individuality. Not a woman who panders to an idea of what she thinks he wants because while that may be flattering or fun at first, that gets old very quick. I know its cliche' but just get comfortable with being you and all that you are. A guy is going to be drawn to that regardless of your shape, size, etc.

In the OP you said you have some self doubt issues that seem color your experiences with guys and I think you should maybe explore/work on that. How we feel about ourselves is everything. We teach people how to treat us.

So it might not be about having the wrong bbw shape for FAs or any of that. It could just be treating yourself well demanding that from any man regardless of his preference.
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Old 04-04-2011, 08:46 PM   #50
jr000
 
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Default well...

my most recent ex was a 16/18, hourglass to pear shape, and i was physically attracted to her from the first moment i saw her

i've been attracted to a variety of physical 'types' my entire life, it's more about shape and build than dress size to me

a friend of mine told me the more you fixate on something the more you repel it (yes, she was quoting the secret, but it's not really easy for me to dismiss because, career-wise, it's worked for me)....the real trick is to be comfy in your own skin and let that show to everyone around you, the rest will work itself out

and for what it's worth, if i was la-based, i'd totally be into you, blurry pics and all
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