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Old 10-07-2011, 07:18 PM   #1
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Default Sexual Signals....

What are the markers that you pick up on from others that let you know that they want to have sex with you?

It can be the hints you get from your Significant Other to explaining what some guy did in a bar once upon a time and even to What some total stranger in a grocery said one time.

All impressions/experiences welcome. It could be interesting to see how similar...or different we all can be.
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Old 10-07-2011, 07:29 PM   #2
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With someone you are still getting to know:

First thing that comes to mind is when a guy undresses you with his eyes and licks his lips.
All he wants to talk about is sex.
He stares at your belly or your boobs when he talks to you instead of looking into your eyes.

With someone you are already sleeping with:
He constantly tells you. LOL
You find yourself sexting in the middle of the day
He does romantic things
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Old 10-07-2011, 08:15 PM   #3
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Wait.... people actually give signs?
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Old 10-07-2011, 08:23 PM   #4
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It's all in the eye-contact with me. I think I'm just really good at picking that up and body language, whether it's with someone I'm intimate with or a stranger.

I recall once I was talking with someone and I liked him as much as he liked me and I realized that he was mirroring everything I was doing, unconsciously. I was resting my hand on my cheek and I looked over at him (a friend of mine was chatting with us) and he was doing it too. When I realized what was happening, I actually blushed because I knew he didn't realize it. It was quite sweet, and I later found out that it's very very common. In fact, motivational speakers for dating and meeting people teach it as a tool to use deliberately to attract someone but I know this guy didn't know it. His whole demeanor was just too genuinely goofy (and not smarmy)to fake.
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Old 10-07-2011, 08:29 PM   #5
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I am honestly completely oblivious, you need to hit me over the head with a sledghammer or tell me because I really dont pick up the signposts
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Old 10-07-2011, 09:31 PM   #6
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I am the same way, I never pick up on signals, I think because where I am here there isn't much appreciation for a lady my size so I never notice if people are sending me signals... I wish people didn't beat around the bush some people like me are to stun to notice just come up and talk to me and tell me whats on your mind I am not psychic LOL
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Old 10-08-2011, 12:10 PM   #7
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Let me share some of my own:

*when a man keeps trying to move closer to you- it can be subtle but he's working his way into your personal zone.

*he's more attentive than usual- or seems to be. He might not be actually paying a lot of attention to what you say but he keeps looking at you.

*Some men are cooler than others with their eyes...ones that don't know you well will be careful not to let you see them looking but the ones I have been intimate with don't mind blatantly looking at me below the neck.

*he seems....nicer. He's more likely to rub your neck or hold hands with you. When he's feeling physical, he tends to touch more.

*Some men make suggestive comments- some more subtle than others.


Some signals I might give:

*I move my body closer than usual and want to touch him more.

*I make flirty comments.

*I tend to feel more shy- and might either start avoiding eye contact.....or become much more direct with eye contact when I'm feeling brazen.

*I feel a little more relaxed and I'm guessing that my body language shows that. I also allow him to touch me more.

**Touching doesn't necessarily mean he reaches out and grabs your boob or your arse in the beginning.....he just gets closer.
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Old 10-08-2011, 12:51 PM   #8
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There are no subtle signals with mine ... I just get told straight out and pushed onto the bed and/or couch and/or [insert other area here that better not hurt to get pushed onto or there will be hell to pay]

I am straightforward too, except for one thing ... rocking my hips back and forth while lying in peace.
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Old 10-08-2011, 01:47 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
Let me share some of my own:

*when a man keeps trying to move closer to you- it can be subtle but he's working his way into your personal zone.

*he's more attentive than usual- or seems to be. He might not be actually paying a lot of attention to what you say but he keeps looking at you.

*Some men are cooler than others with their eyes...ones that don't know you well will be careful not to let you see them looking but the ones I have been intimate with don't mind blatantly looking at me below the neck.

*he seems....nicer. He's more likely to rub your neck or hold hands with you. When he's feeling physical, he tends to touch more.

*Some men make suggestive comments- some more subtle than others.


Some signals I might give:

*I move my body closer than usual and want to touch him more.

*I make flirty comments.

*I tend to feel more shy- and might either start avoiding eye contact.....or become much more direct with eye contact when I'm feeling brazen.

*I feel a little more relaxed and I'm guessing that my body language shows that. I also allow him to touch me more.

**Touching doesn't necessarily mean he reaches out and grabs your boob or your arse in the beginning.....he just gets closer.
You know, I think I have no problem initiating the signals if I'm feeling brazen, but I'm bad at giving signals back. It takes me a while to process them and by the time I've figured it out the moment is gone and then I have to wonder if I imagined the whole thing....I can't even think about signals I'd give back. But if I were starting them I'd touch some body part like a leg or an arm, and for a while I thought that was a good way to flirt, but I think that can also be ambiguous. I'm still trying to figure out this stuff.
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Old 10-08-2011, 02:19 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by olwen View Post
You know, I think I have no problem initiating the signals if I'm feeling brazen, but I'm bad at giving signals back. It takes me a while to process them and by the time I've figured it out the moment is gone and then I have to wonder if I imagined the whole thing....I can't even think about signals I'd give back. But if I were starting them I'd touch some body part like a leg or an arm, and for a while I thought that was a good way to flirt, but I think that can also be ambiguous. I'm still trying to figure out this stuff.
I think we all give them back....it's just a matter of recognizing what we do. I think I started realizing my own signals because I spent many years purposely hiding them. However, even in shyness/fear I suspect we still give them.

Would be nice if some of the guys or ladies that like ladies would sound off in this thread, eh?
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Old 10-08-2011, 02:29 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
I think we all give them back....it's just a matter of recognizing what we do. I think I started realizing my own signals because I spent many years purposely hiding them. However, even in shyness/fear I suspect we still give them.

Would be nice if some of the guys or ladies that like ladies would sound off in this thread, eh?
Oh, I don't know. I imagine if a person is shy or nervous they wouldn't do anything. I'm not overly shy or overly outspoken and I've discovered I'm really good at hiding my feelings so even if I was interested (and completely sober) I wouldn't give any signals at all, mostly out of nervousness.

Responses from some guys would be great too.
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Old 10-08-2011, 02:54 PM   #12
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Dudes in this part of the world often just straight up and tell you When you want said male person back it really does make life easier but it can be deeply aggravating, sometimes I find it threatening and really it all depends on the context. Watching the 'I wanna do you' dance between two women has been very interesting to me because i honestly still think in terms of men being the ones who do the approaching - terribly dated but that's always been my experience. So with lesbians its all terribly intriguing and a little complicated. I'm constantly left going lol!
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Old 10-08-2011, 03:47 PM   #13
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I always err no the side of caution and assume no interest unless she's actually trying to (peacefully!) touch my junk.
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Old 10-08-2011, 07:44 PM   #14
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I always err no the side of caution and assume no interest unless she's actually trying to (peacefully!) touch my junk.


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Old 10-08-2011, 08:06 PM   #15
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My signals:

-I smile more

-I flirt with my eyes (bat my eyes, looking down coyly, aw shucks)

-My heart beats faster

-Touch my hair

- Laugh

-tell corny jokes

-Voice gets higher pitched, lol

His signals:

-eye contact

-guy moves closer with his legs apart

-chemical signals that you just know he likes you
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Old 10-08-2011, 09:55 PM   #16
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-tell corny jokes
This is another of my signals. It may or may not be an aphrodisiac depending on who my target is.
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Old 10-09-2011, 02:13 PM   #17
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If a guy just wants to have sex with me I always pick up on that, I just always know, and run. But if a guy really likes me and is feeling me in a romantic sense, I never pick up on that, and unless he or somebody else (usually somebody else) points it out to me I'll never see it.
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Old 10-09-2011, 02:27 PM   #18
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I've never been good at giving OR acknowledging signals, but having been with my husband for eight years... we're pretty obvious to each other at this point.

I...
1. become very quiet, and when I do talk, my voice is lower.
2. tilt my head down and look up through my eyelashes.
3. do this kind of half smile thing with my mouth.
4. find myself doing lip biting, jaw working, that sort of thing.
5. move differently, in general; everything becomes more fluid, I guess.

He...
1. does similar things - becomes quiet, huskier voice.
2. does the downward face tilt, eyes narrowed / intense thing.
3. ..well, the rest is pretty straightforward, and has been mentioned aplenty
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Old 10-09-2011, 04:20 PM   #19
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I'm horrible at sending signals!
Also, terrible at differentiating "friendly, nice, fun guy" signals and "I'm into you guy" signals. Ya know..those guys that are touchy-feely and smiley/jokey with everyone but you didn't realize that? Or is it just me?


-edit- I suppose I am not strictly meaning sexual signals, just "into you" signals.

To make my answer match the topic more: I've only really been directly propositioned..no signals given that I noticed! lol

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Old 10-09-2011, 04:31 PM   #20
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A nice list of signals to reference

1. That certain ' inviting look' that you get - like a cheshire cat
2. suggestive comments
3. being candid -not too blunt ( in the past folks have been candid with me- I like it) but this depends
on the person and timing.....

Of coures if all else fails...




go with the Hamster Stare...
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Old 10-09-2011, 07:35 PM   #21
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Ok, so there's this cute guy I work with at my clinical site...

He's always been super nice to me...offering to help me lift things, clean things, etc....

He's been trying to burn a CD for me with a few songs that we listen to while working...one of these songs happens to be "Motivation" by Kelly Rowland ft. Busta Rhymes, Trey Songz & Fabolous....we sing this song together (he knows I LOOOOOVE Trey Songz's part where he's like "I'm almost there" lol).

Then, for the last two weeks or so he's been following me around the workplace and asking me what I'm doing this weekend. I tell him that I study or whatever. I don't really do much. He then has said "Well, you should go to a movie with my friends and I...get out and have some fun." I thought nothing of it and I giggled and moved on. On Friday, he was talking about trying to take someone to The Lion King 3D or something....and how she hasn't said anything or something...and then my classmate said "Ask her! She's right here!" I don't know if they were talking about me or not....I was half listening to the conversation...

Needless to say, I can't pick up on cues...and I definitely don't know if this guy likes me or whatever? lol Maybe he's shy. Who knows? He's got two more weeks to get enough balls to say something, otherwise, too bad. lol I flirt with him a lot...so, yeah. lol
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Old 10-09-2011, 08:12 PM   #22
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Ok, so there's this cute guy I work with at my clinical site...

He's always been super nice to me...offering to help me lift things, clean things, etc....

He's been trying to burn a CD for me with a few songs that we listen to while working...one of these songs happens to be "Motivation" by Kelly Rowland ft. Busta Rhymes, Trey Songz & Fabolous....we sing this song together (he knows I LOOOOOVE Trey Songz's part where he's like "I'm almost there" lol).

Then, for the last two weeks or so he's been following me around the workplace and asking me what I'm doing this weekend. I tell him that I study or whatever. I don't really do much. He then has said "Well, you should go to a movie with my friends and I...get out and have some fun." I thought nothing of it and I giggled and moved on. On Friday, he was talking about trying to take someone to The Lion King 3D or something....and how she hasn't said anything or something...and then my classmate said "Ask her! She's right here!" I don't know if they were talking about me or not....I was half listening to the conversation...

Needless to say, I can't pick up on cues...and I definitely don't know if this guy likes me or whatever? lol Maybe he's shy. Who knows? He's got two more weeks to get enough balls to say something, otherwise, too bad. lol I flirt with him a lot...so, yeah. lol
He's all but wearing a neon-flashing "I dig you" sign, F&P
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Old 10-09-2011, 08:17 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
What are the markers that you pick up on from others that let you know that they want to have sex with you?

It can be the hints you get from your Significant Other to explaining what some guy did in a bar once upon a time and even to What some total stranger in a grocery said one time.

All impressions/experiences welcome. It could be interesting to see how similar...or different we all can be.
After so many years with my husband, I know what he's thinking with NO signals

But for me, it has always been (as CP already mentioned) when someone is closely mirroring my own behaviors/non-verbals.
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Old 10-09-2011, 08:18 PM   #24
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I'm very bad at picking up signals. My wife & I were dating while at a Naafa convention & she picked up on a several gals who were flirting we me & I didn't have a clue. Married 20 years now - She got tired of talking with me on a cold Nov night out in the parking lot for an hour so she asked me out on a date
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Old 10-10-2011, 09:46 AM   #25
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I am honestly completely oblivious, you need to hit me over the head with a sledghammer or tell me because I really dont pick up the signposts
You're better then me. In my case the Lady has to hold up one of those giant Tonight Show looking cue cards. Or else use neon lights, and even then I usually reply "are you sure you mean me" and do the look around to see if there's someone else in the room
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