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Old 10-07-2014, 06:29 AM   #101
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Originally Posted by FluffyButterfly80 View Post
... it seems like as soon as i crept over the 300 lb mark and got up to about 308-310- i started noticing that I actually have felt like crap. LOL * ultimately ended up at 320 at my very highest- currently i sit around 303-304))
Two quick thoughts for what it is worth:

The one large scale study that I've seen on the issue found that most of the health gains from weight loss seemed to happen with the first 10% of weight lost. Now, most of the people in that study would not be as big as a lot of the people here, so 10% of weight would probably a higher portion of their body fat than it would at higher weights, but still the general good news is that it often doesn't take all that large losses to really make a change in health. So keep at it, good things will come out of it, and quite possibly sooner than you'd expected!

There is of course a lot of variation between people, but over the many years I've been around Dimensions, I've seen a lot of women say something along the lines of "At about 270-280 pounds I still felt really good, I could do everything I wanted, I could do stuff for hours, my health felt good. But now that I'm noticeably over 300 none of that seems to be the case anymore." The threshold will be different for everyone (height, genetics, other health factors, etc), but it feels to me that for a lot of women it is somewhere in the upper 200s that is the highest weight their body holds comfortably. In other words, you aren't alone in your experiences!

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Originally Posted by loopytheone View Post
I always remember when I was about 15 and 105 lbs, my mother used to tell me that I needed to lose seven pounds and grow about four inches (I was about the same height as now, 5'2) to be 'healthy' and 'normal'. That always stuck in my head, that I needed to weigh less than 98 lbs (to make up for being short) in order to be 'acceptable'. She always went on about wanting/wanting me to have bony knees and a flat stomach and visible hip bones and ribs and such. I know when I was 21 I dieted down to about 115 lbs and still felt so huge and disgusting, even though I was ill from being so thin and starving myself.
It sounds to me like your mother has images with rather distorted body image. For 5'2", 98 pounds would be well into the 'underweight' category by even the medical charts (i.e. thin enough that health issues and mortality are more common--of course for some people that is just their natural size and it is fine, but for most people it is not a healthy weight).

I'm glad you built up your own, more reasonable, standard in due course! But sorry you had to run that mental/emotional gauntlet to get here.
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Old 10-07-2014, 09:58 AM   #102
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It sounds to me like your mother has images with rather distorted body image. For 5'2", 98 pounds would be well into the 'underweight' category by even the medical charts (i.e. thin enough that health issues and mortality are more common--of course for some people that is just their natural size and it is fine, but for most people it is not a healthy weight).
This is exactly the problem!

Loopy's mother only displayed what is the current body image norm. Underweight is what is conveyed to young girls and women these days as the ideal they have to aspire to.
Medical stats might say that a BMI of 18-25 is the 'healthy' category - for younger females though only a BMI <20 is socially and visually acceptable, everything else is 'fat', with zero tolerance.

Where do you think all the eating disorders and body dismorphia comes from?
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Old 10-07-2014, 04:02 PM   #103
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I'm not fat
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Old 10-07-2014, 04:03 PM   #104
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Oh wait.....
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Old 10-07-2014, 04:31 PM   #105
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I've always been fat...but the funny thing is, I never felt fat. I always think of myself as "normal" size...just like everyone else. It's when I see photos of me that I realize I'm not normal-sized! I hate when that happens!
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Old 10-07-2014, 08:16 PM   #106
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Originally Posted by loopytheone View Post
I really, really respect this. To me this is a really healthy attitude to have towards size and I know it can be tough to think like that so you should be really proud of yourself.

I also totally understand what you mean about feeling like you had to get down to a certain number in order to feel worthy. I always remember when I was about 15 and 105 lbs, my mother used to tell me that I needed to lose seven pounds and grow about four inches (I was about the same height as now, 5'2) to be 'healthy' and 'normal'. That always stuck in my head, that I needed to weigh less than 98 lbs (to make up for being short) in order to be 'acceptable'. She always went on about wanting/wanting me to have bony knees and a flat stomach and visible hip bones and ribs and such. I know when I was 21 I dieted down to about 115 lbs and still felt so huge and disgusting, even though I was ill from being so thin and starving myself.

It has taken me a long time to realise that hey, I am healthy at 175lbs and I don't need to weigh 90 something pounds in order to be accepted. At last I am finally caring about my health and my wellbeing as opposed to trying to keep starving myself like I did as a teenager. And it is really inspiring to see somebody else who has managed to see past the 'I must get to this number to be acceptable' mentality and focused on their health instead.
I am so glad that you have over come that same mentality. Those are some low numbers to play around with in terms of weight. If you weren't a stronger person that could have taken an awful turn! ((hugs) to u!
It is so damaging when it is family making us feel that way. I know exactly how that feels. I've been picked at and hounded as long as i can remember by my family about my weight. It's pretty heartbreaking.
I was just talking to a friend the other day how when i was down in the low 200's all i ever heard was how i needed to lose weight. And i know for a fact that if i lost all that weight right now, and got to that low 200's my family would be thrilled for me and tell me how fantastic i look. It kind of pisses me off.. because where was that support back when i was already at that number? Grrrrr lol

But luckily i'm in a different place mentally now than i was then. I will just say "Thank you" and be happy with myself. haha
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Old 10-07-2014, 08:19 PM   #107
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[QUOTE=happily_married;2099121]@ Fluffybutterfly, you are beautiful and have unmeasurable value as a human being. Bringing yourself to this realization is perhaps one of the most important things toucan do. From there every decision you make about health, weight loss, etc is done because it is the decision you are making for you. I wish you well in your efforts to improve the way you feel about yourself. It sounds like you are on your way.

Thank you su much! i really appreciate the amazing encouragement! <3
Every day i 'm noticing little improvements on my outlook on my entire existence. It feels pretty amazing!
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Old 10-07-2014, 08:33 PM   #108
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tad View Post
Two quick thoughts for what it is worth:

The one large scale study that I've seen on the issue found that most of the health gains from weight loss seemed to happen with the first 10% of weight lost. Now, most of the people in that study would not be as big as a lot of the people here, so 10% of weight would probably a higher portion of their body fat than it would at higher weights, but still the general good news is that it often doesn't take all that large losses to really make a change in health. So keep at it, good things will come out of it, and quite possibly sooner than you'd expected!

There is of course a lot of variation between people, but over the many years I've been around Dimensions, I've seen a lot of women say something along the lines of "At about 270-280 pounds I still felt really good, I could do everything I wanted, I could do stuff for hours, my health felt good. But now that I'm noticeably over 300 none of that seems to be the case anymore." The threshold will be different for everyone (height, genetics, other health factors, etc), but it feels to me that for a lot of women it is somewhere in the upper 200s that is the highest weight their body holds comfortably. In other words, you aren't alone in your experiences!
I appreciate your input! I can definitely relate to the whole being able to do thinks and not feeling exhausted around the 270-280 mark. I sat in that range for several years and never felt miserable. Of course I noticed some issues- That's still a lot of weight, but i swear i crept over that 300 mark and its like a switch flipped.. my body said "WHAO, What's happening here???? we can't deal with this... it's time to do something!" It is definitely nice to know i'm not alone in this!
THanks again!
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Old 10-07-2014, 08:34 PM   #109
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sorry for all the replies, i have no idea how to do multiple quotes in one post!
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Old 10-08-2014, 05:46 AM   #110
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sorry for all the replies, i have no idea how to do multiple quotes in one post!
It is a bit obscure--I think most people have to get told how to do it (I know I did!)

In each post there are a few buttons in the bottom right corner. The second one from the right has on it quotation marks and a + sign. For each post that you want to quote, click that button. Then click the reply button at the bottom of the thread. That will quote each of those posts that you selected.

Have fun with that! (it does have a few quirks you'll just have to experiment with, )
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Old 10-08-2014, 12:09 PM   #111
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My weight hasn't really changed in the last several months, but it feels like my belly has gotten bigger or softer or has settled lower, or something.
- After slacking off for most of the Summer I've been doing some more exercises, and have noticed it getting in the way more than it used to.
- some jeans feel tighter than they did last Spring at the same or slightly higher weight.
- it feels heavier in my lap, or when sprawling over the waistband of my pants
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Old 10-08-2014, 06:44 PM   #112
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tad View Post
It is a bit obscure--I think most people have to get told how to do it (I know I did!)

In each post there are a few buttons in the bottom right corner. The second one from the right has on it quotation marks and a + sign. For each post that you want to quote, click that button. Then click the reply button at the bottom of the thread. That will quote each of those posts that you selected.

Have fun with that! (it does have a few quirks you'll just have to experiment with, )
I think I did it!! haha Thank you!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ms Charlotte BBW View Post
I've always been fat...but the funny thing is, I never felt fat. I always think of myself as "normal" size...just like everyone else. It's when I see photos of me that I realize I'm not normal-sized! I hate when that happens!
Haha Yes- I Hate when that happens!
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Old 10-08-2014, 09:27 PM   #113
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Meh, I was born fat!
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Old 10-19-2014, 07:07 AM   #114
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My moment was a few years back when I picked up a pair of what I thought were UK size 12 jeans that fit just right but when I got home I looked at the label I realised they were actually US size 12, making me 2 sizes up from what I thought I was. Which sort of explained the sausage tube effect my old stretchy jeans were having on me...
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Old 10-19-2014, 02:25 PM   #115
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I distinctly remember starting to "feel" fat at age 11. I wasn't but remember a skinny friend sitting behind me in sixth grade talking about going on a diet...and me thinking how horrible it would be if I didn't get on one myself.

I wasn't fat.....but that was the age I was molested. That seems like the beginning of decades of distorted body image and disordered eating. It was easier to turn my emotions onto self loathing than face the really awful shit of what was happening around me and have to feel the way I did.
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Old 10-24-2014, 09:05 AM   #116
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My moment, and what started my search for a site like this, came last week when I decided to renew my Y membership for the first time in about a year because I wanted to get back in the pool. I've fluctuated from 210 to my previous high of 265 and back several times since my early twenties, but I have always been fit/fat, if that makes any sense at all. I was around 240 back in January when I got laid off from my job, and I spent 9 months unemployed and bored out of my mind, and also paying not a bit of attention to my size because it didn't really matter. I mean, I was aware that I have gained weight, but I dunno, my mental image tends to stick to about what I look like at 265 no matter what I actually weigh. My luck finally changed a few weeks ago and I found a new position and got my membership renewed. So I grabbed my swimsuit and headed to the locker room. It was there that I got my wake up call lol. Swimsuits are pretty forgiving due to the amount of stretch in the material, but not this forgiving. My belly was sorta squished out of the leg holes (how on earth does that even happen?) and I felt like I was wearing a thong while simultaneously showing entirely too much cleavage. I ended up splitting the side seam on my swimsuit trying to get back out of it, and the scale informed me that I am now the proud(?) owner of 292 pounds. I had to order a new swimsuit online, and I'm trying to get back into my mile a day routine, but mostly I just float in the deep end right now because I'm having a hard time getting through more than a few laps before I can't catch my breath anymore. I've never been fat/fat before lol, and I'm not really all that motivated at the moment because the holidays are coming up quick and I don't want to feel bad for enjoying them. That and I'm actually pretty content with my body as it is, you know?
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Old 10-24-2014, 09:59 AM   #117
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I don't think there's ever been a moment of revelation for me. I started gaining weight when I was 8, really put it on at 10, and just kind of stayed big my whole life.

2 years ago I got really motivated, lost 80 pounds (was at 220), felt good, but I wanted more. My goal was to fit into a size 12, and I was still at 22. When I stalled out, I got frustrated and ended up slipping into old habits. Now I'm back up over 300, and there are daily moments when I look in the mirror and remember just how big I am.

I'm trying to learn, though; to be happy regardless of my size, to focus on my health and less on my weight, and to pass that on to my kids.
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Old 11-05-2014, 06:48 PM   #118
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When I came home from a three month assignment on the road and my ex girlfriend pulled me aside and said "oh my god, you got fat!" and it dawned on me that over time i had to replace the entire wardrobe i left with, with newer larger sizes as i needed them.
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Old 11-16-2014, 01:41 PM   #119
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I just encountered one of these moments. I've been working in sterile areas of a hospital and had to wear sterile scrubs, so I wore shorts or sweats for a bit better than a year. In that time I went from 310 to 385, which I was aware of, but my sweats weren't any tighter so there was no issue. Well I recently had to dress up and realized that my 50" pants were nowhere near being able to button. Luckily I had a pair of 54" pants, which lost a button as I took off my belt. Might be time to get a bigger wardrobe.
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Old 12-24-2014, 08:45 AM   #120
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I had one of those moments last night. I was sitting on the edge of the bed, wrapping presents, and the scissors fell to the floor. This is not the first time this has ever happened, so like usual I bent over to pick them up. But this time I fell off the bed. The geometry and physics of how large my belly has gotten apparently say I can't do that anymore.

My weight is several pounds below my highest, but I think I'm the fattest I've ever been. I might decide to do something about that in the new year, but for now I'm just enjoying eating my way through the holidays :-)
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Old 12-26-2014, 09:18 AM   #121
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My weight hasn't really changed in the last several months, but it feels like my belly has gotten bigger or softer or has settled lower, or something.
- After slacking off for most of the Summer I've been doing some more exercises, and have noticed it getting in the way more than it used to.
- some jeans feel tighter than they did last Spring at the same or slightly higher weight.
- it feels heavier in my lap, or when sprawling over the waistband of my pants
I always gain during the holidays, and my belly does this. It seems like I'll have this ball belly forever but I'll notice it in the mirror in the washroom after I've washed my hands and I'm just much bigger than I remembered.
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Old 12-26-2014, 02:33 PM   #122
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I've had several moments like this in the last six months, having gained about 50 pounds in that time. I've had to get rid of clothes I've had for years that I just assumed would always fit me. I'm wearing dresses and skirts more now since pants around my belly are not so comfortable. A week ago I got a good look at myself in a full-length mirror in a dressing room while out shopping, and surprised myself even though I know perfectly well how much the number on the scale has gone up.
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Old 12-26-2014, 07:04 PM   #123
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Just recently I had one of these moments, I take a lot of pictures, but they really don't always capture exactly how you look. I recorded a video of me dancing and when I played it back, I actually stopped and was taken aback by how large I have gotten! It was genuine surprise and for a split second I will admit to hearing all the years of negativity family and strangers have said to me. I got over that fast when I re-watched the video about 5 more times and saw that it was cute haha
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Old 12-27-2014, 10:24 AM   #124
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It's always the clothes and the scale!
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Old 12-27-2014, 07:00 PM   #125
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I am a drinker, a smoker and have for all 27 years of life have been overweight/obese.
I have always had quite physical jobs and don't drive so I'm walking everywhere. I've never felt unfit or unhealthy until about 2 weeks ago when I found myself panting heavily for a solid 10 mins after sex. I know I know, panting after sex is common but this was way different! I was exhausted and afterwards with the girlfriend cuddling up to me squeezing my belly and when she then went to touch my 'thing' i watched her hand dissappear past my large, round soft belly. I felt so fat but at the time, wouldn't trade that turn on for the world!
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