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Old 05-27-2014, 07:19 AM   #126
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Quote:
Originally Posted by loopytheone View Post
Somebody on another fat-friendly website just tried to insist, with no hint of sarcasm or satire, that I am skinny because I weigh under 200 lbs. Not that I am normal sized or just chubby, I am skinny. Despite seeing pictures of me. You know, my medically obese self.

Damn me and my skinnyness!
I've had a few people (read:women) tell me the same thing on this site. Asking me why I post here if I'm skinny, that it's no place for me.

Meh
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Old 06-03-2014, 08:41 AM   #127
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Okay, I know I have a weird sense of humour but I almost died laughing earlier (in front of a policeman and the neighbourhood watch as well).

As I am sure everybody knows, FF has its fair share of weirdos. Anyway, I got talking to someone on there, added them on Skype and had a few cam chats with them. Then I happened to get ill so told him I wouldn't be online much, chatted a bit more, then got ill again. When I was ill he would send me messages through FF asking how I was and such and we were planning on meeting up in a public place just to chat and chill and such. And because he kept asking how I was on FF I thought that, even though I still felt really ill, I would go online to chat to him.

I went on Skype and the first thing he asked was whether or not I wanted to go on cam. I said no because I still felt ill and he completely freaked out. That in itself is kinda hilarious to me, especially considering I hadn't even known the guy for a week! He called me all sorts of names and told me he was 'done with my shit' and 'didn't have to put up with this any more', that he didn't want to meet up with me and told me never to contact him again, which you know, sure, whatever. I had to block him in the end because he just wouldn't shut up. He then changed his profile on FF to say he was only interested in talking to women who wanted to talk on cam and went around rating all my pics and everything badly, which honestly, I found absolutely hilarious. I just thanked my lucky stars that I had found out he was a psycho before we actually met up, learnt my lesson about being too trusting of people, had a laugh and forgot all about it.

Here comes the (to me) funny bit. Today, about two weeks after I last spoke to him, I got a message from him on FF (there is no block feature there). He apologised and tried to tell me that his Skype got hacked and he wanted to talk to me again. ...I repeat, he tried to tell me his Skype got hacked and that he wasn't responsible for anything said that night. I seriously about died of laughter! What, so, somebody hacked his Skype account, typed exactly like he did, asked nicely to see me on cam, knew that me and him were planning to meet up, knew my FF account, changed his profile on FF and stopped him from contacting me on there for two weeks? I mean, I knew the guy was incredibly stupid (I thought he might be a nice person though before he went psycho, which was why we were talking) but seriously?! I mean, what person is stupid enough to think that that makes any sense or that anybody would ever believe that?

I guess that is my amusement for today!
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Old 06-03-2014, 08:58 AM   #128
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Yeah there's a few nutters floating about over there. I think I've shaken off the male fan club.
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Old 06-10-2014, 04:07 PM   #129
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I been getting into podcasts, or rather video podcasts on Youtube and I really like the Norm Macdonald Live show on there and it actually makes me LOL
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Old 06-10-2014, 06:35 PM   #130
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A young woman on the bus this morning was talking on her phone: "I did a nine-hour shift at a day care yesterday. People barfed on me. I should have taken a before-and-after picture. Actually, I wish I could have taken a before-and-after smell."
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Old 06-11-2014, 05:49 AM   #131
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Originally Posted by loopytheone View Post
Okay, I know I have a weird sense of humour but I almost died laughing earlier (in front of a policeman and the neighbourhood watch as well).

As I am sure everybody knows, FF has its fair share of weirdos. Anyway, I got talking to someone on there, added them on Skype and had a few cam chats with them. Then I happened to get ill so told him I wouldn't be online much, chatted a bit more, then got ill again. When I was ill he would send me messages through FF asking how I was and such and we were planning on meeting up in a public place just to chat and chill and such. And because he kept asking how I was on FF I thought that, even though I still felt really ill, I would go online to chat to him.

I went on Skype and the first thing he asked was whether or not I wanted to go on cam. I said no because I still felt ill and he completely freaked out. That in itself is kinda hilarious to me, especially considering I hadn't even known the guy for a week! He called me all sorts of names and told me he was 'done with my shit' and 'didn't have to put up with this any more', that he didn't want to meet up with me and told me never to contact him again, which you know, sure, whatever. I had to block him in the end because he just wouldn't shut up. He then changed his profile on FF to say he was only interested in talking to women who wanted to talk on cam and went around rating all my pics and everything badly, which honestly, I found absolutely hilarious. I just thanked my lucky stars that I had found out he was a psycho before we actually met up, learnt my lesson about being too trusting of people, had a laugh and forgot all about it.

Here comes the (to me) funny bit. Today, about two weeks after I last spoke to him, I got a message from him on FF (there is no block feature there). He apologised and tried to tell me that his Skype got hacked and he wanted to talk to me again. ...I repeat, he tried to tell me his Skype got hacked and that he wasn't responsible for anything said that night. I seriously about died of laughter! What, so, somebody hacked his Skype account, typed exactly like he did, asked nicely to see me on cam, knew that me and him were planning to meet up, knew my FF account, changed his profile on FF and stopped him from contacting me on there for two weeks? I mean, I knew the guy was incredibly stupid (I thought he might be a nice person though before he went psycho, which was why we were talking) but seriously?! I mean, what person is stupid enough to think that that makes any sense or that anybody would ever believe that?

I guess that is my amusement for today!
FF is such a hilarious place lol Im glad you did get to see what a freak he is before meeting him IRL, that would be scary
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Old 06-12-2014, 02:21 AM   #132
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On my way home from work all grumpy, I met a family with a young autistic kid, say about 14. He's super happy about getting to stay up tonight to watch the football. Just talking to everyone and generally not giving a shit. He made giggle to when he told the united fan to shut up. Well it turns out he's a Liverpool fan. So am I.
I took their number, and I'm going to send them my Steve Gerrard signed shirt. Its great for me, I love it but I'm sure he would absolutely adore the thing. So he should own it.
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Old 06-12-2014, 02:05 PM   #133
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That's so awesome.


Quote:
Originally Posted by biglynch View Post
On my way home from work all grumpy, I met a family with a young autistic kid, say about 14. He's super happy about getting to stay up tonight to watch the football. Just talking to everyone and generally not giving a shit. He made giggle to when he told the united fan to shut up. Well it turns out he's a Liverpool fan. So am I.
I took their number, and I'm going to send them my Steve Gerrard signed shirt. Its great for me, I love it but I'm sure he would absolutely adore the thing. So he should own it.
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Old 06-12-2014, 10:35 PM   #134
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This shit only happens in Fresno (all the attorney's and the judge involved in this strange story are my friends and colleagues). Yesterday a Fresno County jury made a mistake filling out verdict forms and unwittingly freed a career criminal.


http://www.fresnobee.com/2014/06/11/...ml?sp=/99/406/


The it took a few hours to process the criminal out of the county jail (I'm sure they were moving real fast). When he was finally released he went to his sister's house and got into an argument with her boy friend. A few hours after his fortuitous release he was dead.



http://www.fresnobee.com/2014/06/12/...-burglary.html
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Old 06-13-2014, 02:32 PM   #135
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The Spain game made me laugh. What a joke.
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Old 06-13-2014, 04:31 PM   #136
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The Spain game made me laugh. What a joke.
I caught the tail end of it with the kids today. That was embarrassing.
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Old 06-17-2014, 05:38 PM   #137
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Normal Moments in Art History with No Murder In Them.
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Old 06-18-2014, 05:01 PM   #138
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It took me a moment to get this xkcd, but then I laughed:
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Old 07-03-2014, 08:14 PM   #139
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I was un-packaging some Angus beef skewers to grill for supper tonight and my hands were slick from the sauce. So when I was cutting open the last one it fumbled out of my hands and the dog had it before it even hit the floor and vanished with it.

Later on he shows up again and drops the bare stick at my feet.
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Old 07-04-2014, 04:11 AM   #140
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Later on he shows up again and drops the bare stick at my feet.
"Fetched it."
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Old 07-04-2014, 10:47 AM   #141
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From Basketball Star to Idiot in 2.5 seconds..

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Old 07-04-2014, 10:56 AM   #142
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Seeing my sister and I trying to use hot rollers for the first time Her curls turned out great! Mine looked like cavatappi pasta!
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Old 07-04-2014, 07:29 PM   #143
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From Basketball Star to Idiot in 2.5 seconds..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9W78nOpsZn8
it took me about 3:40 seconds in to realize that it was the same thing on a loop. I was hoping it'd change, but i found myself laughing hysterically.
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Old 07-06-2014, 08:52 PM   #144
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You know you are tired when you are looking at movies and TV show titles and you mistake the show named *Heroes* for *Herpes*. Not only that but you actually stop a moment and say to yourself 'there's a show called Herpes?"

hahahahaha, now I have the night giggles
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Old 07-07-2014, 11:42 AM   #145
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In the town where I work there is a cat who is so well known he has a FB group and has appeared in blogs. He is getting on a bit, but still roams all over the place. I saw him early in the morning in the carpark and was talking to him and getting his pic for FB when an older couple appeared. I explained he is famous and has blogs about him, in case they thought I was slightly crazy and they duly took his picture. The lady's English was so good I assumed she WAS English. It's only when I start rambling on with anecdotes about Angus the cat that I hear them talk to each other and realise they are Dutch. They looked somewhat bemused at this eccentric English girl and I hurry away embarrassed. No idea what these tourists made of their first encounter with a local!
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Old 07-07-2014, 07:02 PM   #146
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Dog playing "soccer" with a turtle

http://www.cnn.com/video/data/2.0/vi...innocenzo.html
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Old 07-07-2014, 07:28 PM   #147
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In the town where I work there is a cat who is so well known he has a FB group and has appeared in blogs. He is getting on a bit, but still roams all over the place. I saw him early in the morning in the carpark and was talking to him and getting his pic for FB when an older couple appeared. I explained he is famous and has blogs about him, in case they thought I was slightly crazy and they duly took his picture. The lady's English was so good I assumed she WAS English. It's only when I start rambling on with anecdotes about Angus the cat that I hear them talk to each other and realise they are Dutch. They looked somewhat bemused at this eccentric English girl and I hurry away embarrassed. No idea what these tourists made of their first encounter with a local!
Hehehe, there's a famous cat at the vet where we take my kitty. He was on Animal Planet once.
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Old 07-07-2014, 09:55 PM   #148
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the full commercial...lol..towards the end he looks as if he bats for the other team...lol
http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7KyZ/gold-bon...haquille-oneal
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Old 07-08-2014, 04:57 AM   #149
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Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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THIS


I swear I've watched this 100 times. It's so cute.
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Old 07-08-2014, 05:38 AM   #150
WhiteHotRazor
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WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!WhiteHotRazor has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lucca23v2 View Post
the full commercial...lol..towards the end he looks as if he bats for the other team...lol
http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7KyZ/gold-bon...haquille-oneal
Fuck that. Shaq is awesome he's always been a silly bastard so that commercial is great. He's like a giant kid that's just how the dude is. He's obviously not the sharpest knife in the drawer but he's one of the brightest crayons in the box.

Personally I think that commercial is amazing haha
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