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Old 07-16-2012, 06:36 PM   #1
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Default ...So I married a BBW!

Hello, all. I am new here, so take it easy on me. No, I am not a BBW. I am 32 year old male, fairly athletic, about 5'7" and 170 pounds. And I am married to a BBW.

I just wanted to tell my story. I don't know why, I just do. If you don't want to read or listen, that's fine, but I certainly appreciate those of you who do. I think that just writing it out will feel good.

This is basically my story of how I developed from pursuing lean/fit/athletic girls and began to exclusively pursue BBWs.

Years ago I was in a relationship with a stereotypical "hot" girl, who was just a horrible person. While I was deeply committed to her, I passed on an opportunity to split up with her and become close to a very nice girl from my church who was overweight. I can honestly say that I passed because I was already in a relationship and not because of her weight. But I wonder how I would have reacted if my relationship status had been different. That is a question I struggled with even back then. I knew the bigger girl from church was wife material, but I wasn't certain that I was mature enough to accept her for herself at that time. My loss. But this story DOES have a happy ending.

I stayed with my girlfriend for a few years, and then we split up. This period was a time of sexual conflict for me. I wanted to date "hot" girls, but I kept finding my mind wandering to bigger girls. As embarrassing as this is to admit, I even had trouble performing with some of the "hot" girls. So a friend suggested trying something different (without knowing the specific details of my frustration). He simply said, "Try hooking up with a different type of person."

A few nights later I slept with a bigger girl and it was phenomenal. Unfortunately, I didn't get the point my body was trying to tell me. Instead, it restored some of my confidence, and I again started chasing "hot" girls, only to experience the same embarrassments, setbacks and frustrations.

Because I lived the kind of lifestyle I did, athletic, outdoorsy, hiking, running, etc, I had a hard time believing that I was sexually compatible with bigger girls. But a night with another bigger girl changed my mind for good. Unfortunately for me, she was only in it for the night. I begged and begged her to be open to being in a relationship. I am ashamed to say, she took advantage of me a few times, but it is not like I did not benefit from it too! Plus I finally accepted that if I was going to enjoy a healthy sexual relationship, I needed to pursue a bigger girl.

That was when I really learned to love the way a bigger girl looks. I would see a group of girls and look for the thickest one. At one point along the way, I even reached a crucial decision point in which two girls were interested in me. One was a very nicely put together athletic girl, the other weighing in between 250-275. All this is not to say that I dated them because of their weight. I still would look for the same personality-type of qualities that I always had. I just started looking for them coming from bigger girls.

One of the first ones that I really gained some traction with was a woman who told me that she was just recovering from a divorce. She told me that her weight sensitivities were at an all time high because her husband had dumped her for her next door neighbor who was a little "hottie." I confessed that I had only recently decided to pursue a relationship with a girl of her body type, and she told me "Once you go fat, you never go back." She was right. I have not been with a lean/athletic/skinny girl ever since. I am BBW property now. Anyway, she and I split up a few weeks later because I realized that "recovering from" a divorce was really "still finalizing." It was a bit of a disappointment because she really did take good care of me.

I had a few other flings before eventually meeting my wife. Now she was not really a BBW when we met, but she was far from skinny. She was 5'4" and about 160 or so pounds. Lots of weight in her butt and hips. I didn't hold that against her. Over 6 years and 3 kids later, her weight had literally doubled. She actually peaked at 336. She is now down to 296.

My wife is not happy with her weight, but she has a husband who adores her. When she was still over 330 and I was with her, I felt like I was the only man in the world who could handle this person. She carries a lot of her weight in her butt, thighs, and belly. It is a picture of beauty. I love being seen with her in public. Sometimes I'll just happen to look over at her and I just get excited.

I know a lot of guys object to their wives putting on so much weight after the wedding day. As my wife started to gain, it excited me to know that my partner, the only person I am ever going to be with again, was a BBW. I mentioned that she is steadily trimming her weight, and despite my love for her weight, I do support her efforts. I do want her to be happy with herself, obviously. But even if she loses a lot of weight, she will never be a skinny girl. She'll always carry a little extra "something" in all the right places.

Anyway, that's the cliff notes version of my story. I don't want to bore anyone anymore than I already have. If you made it this far, thank you for reading.

There really is not a profound point I am trying to make, no takeaways, no moral of the story. I just needed to share with someone. Once again, I appreciate you reading.

Lastly, I just want to say to those of you who are BBWs, I hope that you love and accept yourselves. I am really happy to have found this forum.
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Old 07-20-2012, 04:46 AM   #2
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Default My Gaining Wife

I was attracted in part to my future wife because she was a little heavy when we met, had some junk in the trunk. We started dating and she said she weighed 160, the same as me. We dated for three years and she put on weight during that time. I noticed at a doctor visit she weighed 194 about two years ago and I would guess she weighs a little over 200 now. We've been married a year and I have supported her two attempts to lose weight through dieting, but she does not like most healthy foods or regular exercize, so dieting soon went by the wayside. My guess is she is going to continue to gain weight, and I like that idea. We are boaters and she wears a two piece bathing suit. I love it that her gut and butt and thighs and love handles are bulging out of the suit. I just want her to be happy and I think she is struggling with the idea of having to permanently change her food and exercise lifestyle to be thinner vs. eating what she likes and not worrying about it. I happen to like her bigger, so that works for me. Selfeshly, I would love to see her 100 pounds heavier, but we'll see.
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Old 07-20-2012, 08:20 AM   #3
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Congratulations on being happily married and I hope your wife is happy with her body as much as you are. I have always been attracted to bigger girls and coincidentally the older I become the more I attracted I am to the bigger range of ssbbw. Still not all of my girlfriends have been bbw or ssbbw because I don't get the chance to meet bigger ladies as I would like so. I dated both slimmer and bigger girls, and only a couple ssbbw. My ex was a full blown ssbbw around 400lbs and I was crazy about her. She was happy with her body but she had many insecurities probably due to previous bad relationships. She left me eventually because she thought I did not love her enough. I realized, late so, that if you truly care about a ssbbw you should shout it at her all the time. Unlike normal-sized women, a ssbbw is more prone to feel hurt and neglected and an FA's job is to show her how wonderful, sexy and beautiful she is and how precious she is to him.
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Old 07-20-2012, 09:37 AM   #4
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I married two years ago next week. She sort of was in the 170s when we met (sort of because she has some "bionic" parts due to bone replacements). She is about 225 now.

I was a virgin (by choice, not opportunity) when we married, and I am not a young guy. I would characterize my early attraction to fat girls as a fetish, maybe because I fell in love with my kindergarten teacher, who was pregnant. As a five-year-old I would stuff stuffed animals under my shirt when I went to bed and pretend I was fat--sort of pretending like I was a girl, I think, but not really. It's hard to explain. But I didn't stop the behavior until I was married.

Of course, once I hit puberty the behavior became overtly sexual, and I started fantasizing about girls I knew gaining weight. I would make up stories in my head. I played some D&D when I was younger, and I would roll dice and have them tell me just how much this or that girl would gain. This added a degree of excitement and mystery to the fantasy. Sometimes pregnancy was a part of the fantasy and some times not. I would masturbate sometimes three times before going to sleep by grinding against blankets stuffed in my clothes in an exaggerated hourglass shape. I worked hard to train myself not to ejaculate early and built up a lot of stamina. As a teenager my fantasies about weight gain were limited to about twenty pounds or so, and mostly associated with larger breasts and booty (unless the story I chose involved pregnancy). After I graduated from college my random weight gain story device changed to mathematical use of the random number function, and quickly the amount of weight gain in the fantasies grew ever larger. I think a lot of us start off this way: we are attracted to larger breasts or butts and expand our attraction from there.

In my dating life, though, I didn't really go after larger girls. Frankly, although I really wanted a girl with big breasts, I was mostly attracted to a pretty face, and personality and values (and particularly in high school, status) were more salient. I didn't meet a lot of people I felt I connected with or who were pretty enough for me (my loss), and I know looking back that the lack of confidence in the fat girls I knew was a major factor in not thinking of them as people I would like to date. My wife, although riddled with plenty of insecurities about her appearance, has that interpersonal confidence. She's also very loving, which is something she instructs me in every day.

My wife was a small-town cheerleader and successful beauty pageant contest as a teenager. She gained weight very quickly in her 20s and got as high as 333 pounds about ten years ago before gastric bypass. She was at 182 when we married and has gained the forty pounds since. I observe her eat, of course, and it isn't much. She truly is that girl with the low metabolism who gains easily.

At Christmas one year her family commented on how she was gaining again and she told them I prefer her larger. They, of course, can't fathom that, and their first interpretation was that it's just the kind of thing a husband says. My wife knows the difference because of how much I rub, squeeze, fondle, and massage her chub. It's still hard for her to believe, I think, but it's certainly not something she can deny.

As I learned about sex with her and unlearned old habits, I quickly realized I wanted more weight on her, particularly in her tummy, just for the feel of it. I quickly got my wish, and I find it very satisfying. I still have fantasies about her gaining substantially more weight, but that's where I want those to stay. The practicalities of her gaining weight and the disappointment she would have keep those fantasies at bay. The role of those stories in arousal and orgasm, though, still is at play. And, of course, fantasy girls aren't real girls, and in real life disappointments and irritations have their role. My wife has seen some of my pictures on my computer and can't believe the size of the women, but I have never talked to her about the weight gain fascination or the role of a weight gain story for her that shows up in my head when we have sex. Maybe some time, but what we have is pretty good, and I don't want that weighing on her. What we're really focused on is a baby. If she got pregnant and gained size and weight, I think I just might explode in delight. Oh, and being a dad would be substantially awesome.
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Old 07-21-2012, 03:34 AM   #5
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Thanks for the replies, guys. I enjoy reading other peoples' stories as well.
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Old 07-21-2012, 09:49 AM   #6
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Gosh, these are adorable stories! Happily_married, congratulations, I hope that you two continue to be happy together!! If I may ask, about how old were you when you realised that you were into big girls?
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Old 07-21-2012, 06:53 PM   #7
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Gosh, these are adorable stories! Happily_married, congratulations, I hope that you two continue to be happy together!! If I may ask, about how old were you when you realised that you were into big girls?
I was in my early 20s for the bulk of my story posted above. I was 24 when the one girl dumped me. I was just a few months shy of 26 when I got married, so a lot happened in a short time. Thank you for your kind words.
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Old 07-21-2012, 08:53 PM   #8
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Welcome to Dims! Very nice post, except that I dislike the fact that some people use 'hot' to describe a thin girl. It has happened more than once on here. "Hot" does not always coincide with "thin". I've seen many "hot" larger women, in fact more so than the thin ones. Hot simply means sexy and beautiful. And I think I'm pretty damn hot myself besides not being a size 2. I'm sorry to be a jerk, but that really kinda irks me. Other than that, I wish for you the best.
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Old 07-21-2012, 09:02 PM   #9
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Welcome to Dims! Very nice post, except that I dislike the fact that some people use 'hot' to describe a thin girl. It has happened more than once on here. "Hot" does not always coincide with "thin". I've seen many "hot" larger women, in fact more so than the thin ones. Hot simply means sexy and beautiful. And I think I'm pretty damn hot myself besides not being a size 2. I'm sorry to be a jerk, but that really kinda irks me. Other than that, I wish for you the best.
He DID say 'stereotypical 'hot' girls' so to me that indicated that he was referring to a culturally acceptable norm which was at one time his thinking but no longer is, hence his post here. He even used quotation marks....I think he did what he could within reasonable expectations to convey that.
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Old 07-22-2012, 06:05 AM   #10
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He DID say 'stereotypical 'hot' girls' so to me that indicated that he was referring to a culturally acceptable norm which was at one time his thinking but no longer is, hence his post here. He even used quotation marks....I think he did what he could within reasonable expectations to convey that.
@ KittyKitten, I completely agree with your complaint. Casting Pearls has me read like a book. I used quotations around the word "hot" to imply a feeling of "so-called..." if that makes sense.

Also, for what it's worth, unless I am being silly, I do not describe my wife as "hot." I actually think it's a shallow term and she and every other woman deserves more respect than that. Perhaps I am just picky about word-use. When I get to know a woman on a more personal level, I simply cannot use that word to describe her. Let me assure you that when I used the word "hot" I did it to capture what mainstream society deems as "hot." I personally find BBWs to be every bit as beautiful as the so-called "hot" girls. Which is why I am on this site to begin with!

Thank you for reading, and I hope this helps you understand my word choice a little better.
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Old 07-22-2012, 10:30 AM   #11
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I hate to rain on this parade but all these stories talk about women who were under 200 lbs when you started dating them. That cheapens the "I married a BBW" thing for me. Really, you dated a thin chick who got fat.
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Old 07-22-2012, 02:32 PM   #12
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Really, you dated a thin chick who got fat.
Inside every thin chick there's a BBW struggling to get out.
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Old 07-22-2012, 02:43 PM   #13
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Really, you dated a thin chick who got fat.
Nobody who knew her at 160 or so would have accused her of being thin. At any rate, her exact size when we got married as well as today is irrelevant to the overall theme of my story, and that is the slow progression and acknowledgement that I am attracted to bigger girls. This is further underscored in my wife's weight gain, and my continued attraction for her.

Still, defense of my argument aside, I do see your point.

BTW, nice profile pic. Hope you don't mind me peeking.
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Old 07-22-2012, 04:56 PM   #14
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The ire that comes up from women here when guys talk about their evolving preferences is one of the reasons I stay away from the size acceptance parts of the board most of the time. Express your irk, ladies. It's certainly a place to do it. But it ruins a really nice thread. And more often than not, it's irk that gets expressed by some really snarky ladies.

And, I suppose the irk may be one of the reasons it's harder to find someone over 200 pounds you might want to marry.
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Old 07-22-2012, 07:33 PM   #15
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Inside every thin chick there's a BBW struggling to get out.
Don't they wish...

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BTW, nice profile pic. Hope you don't mind me peeking.
peek away

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The ire that comes up from women here when guys talk about their evolving preferences is one of the reasons I stay away from the size acceptance parts of the board most of the time. Express your irk, ladies. It's certainly a place to do it. But it ruins a really nice thread. And more often than not, it's irk that gets expressed by some really snarky ladies.

And, I suppose the irk may be one of the reasons it's harder to find someone over 200 pounds you might want to marry.
This might have been a really nice thread to you but it wasn't to me. I take issue with someone who slept with bigger women then married a thinner one just to fatten her up. I am in no way being snarky. I am calling it out for what I see it.

I think you are the one being snarky. Maybe the "irk" on us 200 pounders make us unmarriable? Really? I think it is my confidence and lack of desire to be in a relationship that keeps me single. I am too independent for marriage. Anyway, I find the FAs who marry thin women absurd. It is unfair to everyone involved.

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Old 07-22-2012, 10:08 PM   #16
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Thank you for the lovely story, "happily_married"

My best to you and your special lady


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Old 07-23-2012, 12:27 AM   #17
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This might have been a really nice thread to you but it wasn't to me. I take issue with someone who slept with bigger women then married a thinner one just to fatten her up. I am in no way being snarky. I am calling it out for what I see it.
For what it's worth, I did not marry her with the intention "fattening" her up. It just sort of happened. I did not object as it happened, and actually embraced it. I'm sorry that you do not feel it's a nice thread/story. In my defense, a lot of guys would object to the kind of weight gain that my wife has experienced. I have done all I can do to encourage my wife to love herself as she is, regardless of her weight.
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Old 07-23-2012, 07:04 AM   #18
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For what it's worth, I did not marry her with the intention "fattening" her up. It just sort of happened. I did not object as it happened, and actually embraced it. I'm sorry that you do not feel it's a nice thread/story. In my defense, a lot of guys would object to the kind of weight gain that my wife has experienced. I have done all I can do to encourage my wife to love herself as she is, regardless of her weight.
I'm sorry to take FA frustrations out on you. You do fit the jerky sterotype but every story has its unique details. Life never goes down the perfect path. I am happy your wife has a man that loves her at any size.

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Old 07-23-2012, 02:34 PM   #19
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It sounds a lot like he was just learning more about his preferences rather than just pushing himself away because of social fears. I think a lot of FAs go through things similar, albeit with different stories and different ages. Just my personal opinion.
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Old 07-23-2012, 02:38 PM   #20
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I'm sorry to take FA frustrations out on you. You do fit the jerky sterotype but every story has its unique details. Life never goes down the perfect path. I am happy your wife has a man that loves her at any size.
Jerky stereotype? Hell, you should have seen me at the beginning of this story. I am a much better person now than I was. I guess I really don't blame you for the critique as you see it. Again, all I can say is that my wife, even at 160, was far from being a skinny girl. Add to it that while I grew to like bigger girls, it's not like I set a cutoff minimum weight. She had what I found to be a very appealing body and a wonderful personality.

You don't have to answer because it is a personal question, all I am doing is trying to show you how I am thinking. But imagine your ideal body type in a man. Both physical and personality-wise. Now take the physical side of it, and assume it is 80% of the ideal. Would you still be interested? Would you accept the physical maybe not being a complete ideal if the personality was?

No, my wife was not as big as some of the girls I had dated in the months prior. But she was just enough of the right body style and her personality made up for it.
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Old 07-23-2012, 03:09 PM   #21
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Lastly, I just want to say to those of you who are BBWs, I hope that you love and accept yourselves. I am really happy to have found this forum.
@OP: that was a really nice story, it's always nice to know there's guys like you out there who appreciate women just as they are. all the best to you and your wife
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Old 07-23-2012, 04:36 PM   #22
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Jerky stereotype? Hell, you should have seen me at the beginning of this story. I am a much better person now than I was. I guess I really don't blame you for the critique as you see it. Again, all I can say is that my wife, even at 160, was far from being a skinny girl. Add to it that while I grew to like bigger girls, it's not like I set a cutoff minimum weight. She had what I found to be a very appealing body and a wonderful personality.

You don't have to answer because it is a personal question, all I am doing is trying to show you how I am thinking. But imagine your ideal body type in a man. Both physical and personality-wise. Now take the physical side of it, and assume it is 80% of the ideal. Would you still be interested? Would you accept the physical maybe not being a complete ideal if the personality was?

No, my wife was not as big as some of the girls I had dated in the months prior. But she was just enough of the right body style and her personality made up for it.
This hypothetical equation would never work for me because my ideal man would be a whole harem of different guys.
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Old 07-23-2012, 05:54 PM   #23
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This hypothetical equation would never work for me because my ideal man would be a whole harem of different guys.
You naughty girl, you!
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Old 07-23-2012, 05:58 PM   #24
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This story gives hope to the many fa's who have or likely will marry a thin woman. They can have their cake and eat it too!
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Old 07-23-2012, 10:24 PM   #25
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I'm excited to marry a BBW next month. She is, for the sake of the discussion, "already a BBW."

I think we'd both count it as having our wedding cake and eating it too.
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