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Old 03-11-2013, 05:47 PM   #1
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hi

Ive been a closet FA for years, now im thinking about becoming more open about it. What should i expect or do, and how should i treat my own inabilty to gain weight?
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Old 03-13-2013, 11:39 AM   #2
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To start with, I gotta say it. Is being a FA that much weirder or harder than being a Brony? Because I've met a few FAs or people who aren't FA but understand it, and I've never met a Brony irl. That being said...

I think the biggest thing for me was finding out how many people I know are FA or at least like "thick" girls and can understand FAs. The first time a ssbbw walks by and smiles at you, and you say to your friends, "Damn I wish I was single." and your friend says, "I know what you mean." it's a really great feeling.

Have you ever heard any of your friends talk about a BBW (or maybe just a girl that is a little bigger than average) in a positive way? Maybe that they think it's hot how tight that big woman's jeans are, or that she's popping out of her shirt? It's been very slow over a long time, but now it's not that strange to hear someone say that they like a girl with a big butt, or that they like their wife's body after she's gained a little. You may very well know other FAs that are as shy about it as you.

Not making a big deal about it yourself will help. If someone asks if you like big women, just say yes. If they ask why, ask them what kind of women they like and why. Let them know you like BBW for the same reason they like whatever type of women they are attracted to. You just do and there's nothing wrong with that.
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Old 03-14-2013, 04:34 PM   #3
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thanks for the advice, and to answer your question initially being a brony was just as hard as being an FA, but as its become more socially accepted me being openly brony doesn't cause as many problems as it used to. i have tried talking to a few close friends, thus far the results are not too encouraging, my best friends understand, but alot of my not best friends dont. Plus do to a history of bullying about other things about me its made me alot more nervous about revealing this to others.
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Old 03-14-2013, 06:25 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hamdinger View Post
To start with, I gotta say it. Is being a FA that much weirder or harder than being a Brony? Because I've met a few FAs or people who aren't FA but understand it, and I've never met a Brony irl. That being said...

I think the biggest thing for me was finding out how many people I know are FA or at least like "thick" girls and can understand FAs. The first time a ssbbw walks by and smiles at you, and you say to your friends, "Damn I wish I was single." and your friend says, "I know what you mean." it's a really great feeling.

Have you ever heard any of your friends talk about a BBW (or maybe just a girl that is a little bigger than average) in a positive way? Maybe that they think it's hot how tight that big woman's jeans are, or that she's popping out of her shirt? It's been very slow over a long time, but now it's not that strange to hear someone say that they like a girl with a big butt, or that they like their wife's body after she's gained a little. You may very well know other FAs that are as shy about it as you.

Not making a big deal about it yourself will help. If someone asks if you like big women, just say yes. If they ask why, ask them what kind of women they like and why. Let them know you like BBW for the same reason they like whatever type of women they are attracted to. You just do and there's nothing wrong with that.

Many guys would say they like ample butt and tits, but they have a limit on the body size. Heck, some guys even pat each other on the backs if their buddy is dating someone with ample hips, ass, and/or tits. They deem those as 'acceptable fat'. "Hey, man check out that thick mami." Not everyone wants skin and bones. I think the OP is afraid that the immature guys will pick on him for dating an ssbbw. Many people won't bat an eye if a man is dating a woman on the smaller end of the bbw scale. I've seen plenty of couples where the woman isn't a stick figure.

Fabrony, I know it's easier said than done, and a cliche, but as a grown man, you shouldn't give a flip about what these people think. Most people don't even care, they have a stressful life of their own, too busy to care about who others are fucking. And please don't get into a relationship with an ssbbw and hide her; she will get hip to what is going on if you can't fully accept her and will be very hurt.
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Old 03-14-2013, 11:31 PM   #5
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Many guys would say they like ample butt and tits, but they have a limit on the body size. Heck, some guys even pat each other on the backs if their buddy is dating someone with ample hips, ass, and/or tits. They deem those as 'acceptable fat'. "Hey, man check out that thick mami." Not everyone wants skin and bones. I think the OP is afraid that the immature guys will pick on him for dating an ssbbw. Many people won't bat an eye if a man is dating a woman on the smaller end of the bbw scale. I've seen plenty of couples where the woman isn't a stick figure.
This is true, and there is a lot of distance from "thick" to SSBBW. I can say that as a FA that was "in the closet" for most of my teens and 20s, sometimes we hide behind love for body parts. I used to say, "I love big boobs, and you don't find those on a skinny girl." It would just so happen that that my "not skinny" girls were usually 250 plus. A friend of mine from work would talk about how his wife's butt had gotten so big since she gained some weight and how much he loved it. I would egg him on and ask what else had gotten bigger and how he felt about it. He started talking about her arms and belly and we both started to realize we were talking to another FA. Sometimes when guys are insecure about something we try to hide it behind something we see as more socially acceptable.

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Fabrony, I know it's easier said than done, and a cliche, but as a grown man, you shouldn't give a flip about what these people think. Most people don't even care, they have a stressful life of their own, too busy to care about who others are fucking. And please don't get into a relationship with an ssbbw and hide her; she will get hip to what is going on if you can't fully accept her and will be very hurt.
^^^
This is the real truth of the situation. It shouldn't bother them, and if it does bother them then fuck them. You and whoever you date have just as much right to be happy as anyone. Some of your friends may have questions (try to be patient with them) but after that most of them probably won't care. Worst case they'll be assholes about it. If that happens call them out on it, tell them she doesn't deserve to be treated like that, take her by the hand and walk out.
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Old 03-15-2013, 11:39 AM   #6
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Just as an addition to the wonderful advice already here...I've found that if you treat something as weird/are noticeably self-conscious about it, people will follow suit. On the other hand, if you don't make a big deal out of it and approach it like it's pretty normal, others will be more likely to do the same. They should be your friends. If they see your preferences make you happy, they really shouldn't give you shit for it.
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Old 03-15-2013, 07:29 PM   #7
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heres my response to all 3 of you,

thanks for the advice ^^ im used to not seeing help for the new guy out of other communities in other stuff, so you guys are great let me better sum up my problem though as one misconception has arised it seems. its not that i myself am unconfridable with being a FA, nor do i treat it like that big a deal. THe issue is that i myself dont have the confidence to be open about it, i was hoping that i could get help in being open with it to anyone at all about it like i am right now (getting myself to open this account wasnt easy for me my confidence is that kinda low) so i was hoping for advice on how to be confident enough to be open about it, sorry about being unclear at first :P
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Old 03-16-2013, 12:48 AM   #8
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Start small. Tell one person you're close with. The better that goes the easier it will be next time. People will ask you weird questions about it, like why you like fat women, have you ever liked anyone who wasn't fat, goofy stuff like that. If they know you really well they may not be surprised at all.
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Old 03-17-2013, 03:07 AM   #9
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This closet thing of FAness is ridiculous, nothing else. I can assure you millions of men are into chubby or fat women. There is nothing wrong with being attracted to fat. You are not alone with your desire for a fat partner. If your friends don't recognize the beauty and sexiness of fat, then its their problem not yours. Just, do ignore stupid comments.
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Old 03-17-2013, 03:01 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Hamdinger View Post
Start small. Tell one person you're close with. The better that goes the easier it will be next time.
^This. I'm not a very confident person myself and so I hid my preference for years. I spent far too much time worrying about what other people thought of me. I eventually told my best friend, and he loved it. He couldn't believe that I hadn't told him sooner. After telling him and him being so cool about it, I quickly realised that it's really not a big deal. I told a few more friends and family after this and they had similiar positive reactions.

As I said, it's really not a big deal. It's just what you like, and if people have a problem with that then they're not really worth knowing. Your confidence will go up once you start being more open about it, mine did.
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Old 03-17-2013, 05:37 PM   #11
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See, that's the thing, guys who prefer small chested, little-assed women don't face ridicule from fat admirers and men who love curves. So why should FAs get heat from thin girl lovers for liking fat women?

I lurk on boards where the thread starters post appreciation threads for bbws and thicker women, and then some immature jackasses have the nerve to have something negative to say to the guy, teasing him. Why click on the thread if that is not what you like? I hate that. Then some of the FA cowards would be docile and not defend their love of large women! That's the problem. The fat haters are the most vocal. FAs don't give these guys grief when they post pics of skinny-assed women, so why should FAs get attacked for loving big women?

A lot of thin admirers are so intolerant and arrogant, they think their tastes are the best, just because Hollyweird and the dieting industry backs them, and would taunt men who prefer BBWs. Not everyone wants a thin girl. It's time more FAs say a big fuck you to those that ridicule their tastes.The guy that I am dating at the moment is tall, athletic, and sexy and he is proud to trot my chubby, jiggly ass on his arms when he goes out.

Fabrony, you go ahead and date that big girl! Don't be surprised if you get admiring looks from other men on your sexy woman! Curve lovers are out there, more numerous than you think! It's just that the fat haters are the most vocal and immature. Pay their asses no mind. Your girl probably looks better than their chick, if they even have one, lol. Their only date is their right hand and a Corona. lol.
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Old 03-17-2013, 07:58 PM   #12
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thanks again everyone for all the wonderful advice and support ^^; only when i joined up in brony groups have a felt so much friendship and support from a group. you all are awesome! I'm gona try to work on it but itll be slow work with all the story writing and job stuff i got going on right now, but mabey someday i can be confident ^^
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Old 03-18-2013, 10:31 PM   #13
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thanks again everyone for all the wonderful advice and support ^^; only when i joined up in brony groups have a felt so much friendship and support from a group. you all are awesome! I'm gona try to work on it but itll be slow work with all the story writing and job stuff i got going on right now, but mabey someday i can be confident ^^
take your time..ease into it, but understand that just because it isn't necessarily socially acceptable doesnt make it wrong by any stretch of imagination. confidence will come with time, but it has to come from you.

welcome!
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Old 03-19-2013, 05:13 PM   #14
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im trying its just confidence is not something im used to :P
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Old 03-25-2013, 10:12 PM   #15
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I don't see the reason to specifically announce that you are an FA. Honestly what would work for you is to just practice the mannerisms of said fetish publicly, but subtlety. Being nonchalant about it is the best way to go. Its only a big deal if you make it that way.
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