I went out barhopping last night with a group of friends to celebrate one of their 21st birthdays-since I'm still not of age, I was the DD and ended up mostly waiting outside while they got our friend properly liquored up.
We were in one of the more questionable/raunchy neighborhoods in my city, and I was waiting outside alone wearing a tank top and shorts...so I got quite a few individuals trying to buy me drinks or have me accompany them to a different bar. One guy even tried to grab me and take me to his place....eeep. Made me wish I hadn't lost my pepper spray. :doh:
Now some of this attention was unwanted and annoying, but there were times it was sort of flattering.
What ruined my night was a couple of drunk guys passing by in a taxi. I was running after one of my drunk friends, and they started yelling things at me. "Don't do it, you're fat!" "You gotta burn off some calories!" ...among other things i couldn't quite make out.
I know they were drunk. And stupid drunk guys say/do stupid things when they're together. And that I shouldn't let hurtful things strangers say to me get to me...
But I can't really help it. Later that night two of my friends noticed I was sort of upset, and I told them what happened. Then, because they're my friends, they promised to kick the crap out of the guys, and assured me that I was beautiful the way I was, etc etc. Now I know I should listen to my friends, and that it's their opinion that really matters, not those guys from the taxi...yet...since they're my friends, I feel that they were obligated to tell me those things. Even if I was unattractive, they would've still told me that I was beautiful, because since I'm their friend, I AM beautiful to them.
I'm still a little upset about it. Am I really so big to you that you need to yell at me to lose weight? I already know what I look like. I'm already trying to lose weight...I don't need you to bring me down even more. ::sigh::
Just when I was starting to feel more self-confident, something like this happens and I'm starting to feel really self-conscious and insecure again. Perhaps it was my fault for wearing clothes that showed so much skin. If I had been wearing a sweater/jeans or something, I doubt I would've drawn as much attention to myself.
Very conflicted right now. I want to love the skin I'm in, but some people make it very difficult.
We were in one of the more questionable/raunchy neighborhoods in my city, and I was waiting outside alone wearing a tank top and shorts...so I got quite a few individuals trying to buy me drinks or have me accompany them to a different bar. One guy even tried to grab me and take me to his place....eeep. Made me wish I hadn't lost my pepper spray. :doh:
Now some of this attention was unwanted and annoying, but there were times it was sort of flattering.
What ruined my night was a couple of drunk guys passing by in a taxi. I was running after one of my drunk friends, and they started yelling things at me. "Don't do it, you're fat!" "You gotta burn off some calories!" ...among other things i couldn't quite make out.
I know they were drunk. And stupid drunk guys say/do stupid things when they're together. And that I shouldn't let hurtful things strangers say to me get to me...
But I can't really help it. Later that night two of my friends noticed I was sort of upset, and I told them what happened. Then, because they're my friends, they promised to kick the crap out of the guys, and assured me that I was beautiful the way I was, etc etc. Now I know I should listen to my friends, and that it's their opinion that really matters, not those guys from the taxi...yet...since they're my friends, I feel that they were obligated to tell me those things. Even if I was unattractive, they would've still told me that I was beautiful, because since I'm their friend, I AM beautiful to them.
I'm still a little upset about it. Am I really so big to you that you need to yell at me to lose weight? I already know what I look like. I'm already trying to lose weight...I don't need you to bring me down even more. ::sigh::
Just when I was starting to feel more self-confident, something like this happens and I'm starting to feel really self-conscious and insecure again. Perhaps it was my fault for wearing clothes that showed so much skin. If I had been wearing a sweater/jeans or something, I doubt I would've drawn as much attention to myself.
Very conflicted right now. I want to love the skin I'm in, but some people make it very difficult.
