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  1. T

    What you do and dont like to see in stories

    I am guilty of the unfinished story charge. And, it does bug me that I lost interest in the story. Had a whole outline and everything. But, in all honesty, the story Wilson Barbers put up called "Waking Moments" is a far better version of the story I was going to anyway.
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    Life Changer - by Joel (BBW (Multiple), Magic, ~MWG)

    Okay, for the most part, I like your work, Joel. So, I really am trying to be constructive here. There are two glaring issues and one small one that would improve your work if you fixed. The first is using synonyms. Use different adjectives to describing your people. Only can read "skinny...
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    Divergence - by Matt L.- (~BHM/~BBW, Imagery, Romance, ~SWG)

    Wow... Really, cohen? It is called "Part 1." Maybe that you do not know what that means. That happens. It is the first section of a series. Now, there will be a BBW. The character, Beth Ann, will gain weight and that weight will be documented by Tim, the main character. That...
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    The Hormone Remote - by elroycohen (~BBW[Multiple], ~~WG, Pregnancy, Sci-Fi)

    Ok, I do see how a suit of armor is out of the question, but atleast give the guy a cup. Great addition, ec.
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    Questions to Calories - Model Week - by elroycohen (~BBW-Mult, ~~WG, Feeding)

    You did it again, elroy. Great story.
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    Flip of a Coin - by IrishBard (~BBW (Multiple), Magic, ~XWG)

    Thank you, everybody.
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    Flip of a Coin - by IrishBard (~BBW (Multiple), Magic, ~XWG)

    A continuation of IrishBard's story - Flip of a Coin The 50 Cent Story by Toby115 “He did what?! After all of your hard work?” Karen Silvers and Staci Wells had just sat down at a decent restaurant after a grueling workout session at the nearby gym. Both of them at twenty-seven years...
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    The Hormone Remote - by elroycohen (~BBW[Multiple], ~~WG, Pregnancy, Sci-Fi)

    Hey, it was fun being able to discuss this and I'm glad to be able to. Talking with other authors leads to inspiration for all, or so I'm told.
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    The Hormone Remote - by elroycohen (~BBW[Multiple], ~~WG, Pregnancy, Sci-Fi)

    I have to say, this has been an enjoyable story. There is just the one thing: this guy is really smart and capable of understanding anything, right? So, why can't he build some death-robot or suit or something for protection? I'm sure, as the author, you have a reason, ie plot doesn't allow...
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    The Mr. Night Chronicles: The Ring - Prologue - by Toby115 (~BBW, ~~WG, Magic)

    Thank you, everybody.
  11. T

    The Mr. Night Chronicles: The Ring - Prologue - by Toby115 (~BBW, ~~WG, Magic)

    ~BBW, ~~WG, Magic - An uptight businesswoman buys a ring that might not be as great of a deal as she thought The Mr. Night Chronicles: The Ring By: Toby115 The Prologue It was a bright Friday afternoon and the lunch rush at the Empire Mall was just wrapping up. Stacy Allen was...
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    The Mr. Night Chronicles: Choices (WG, Magic, Pregnancy)

    The Mr. Night Chronicles: Choices Mr. Night was taking a lunch break in the food court at the mall, where his antique shop is, and was watching 27 year old Mary Addison play with her 3 and a half year old daughter, Nancy. Mary stood about 5’7” and had long brown hair, tied back in a...
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    Bio-Morph - by Irish Bard (~BBW, ~XWG, Alien Powers)

    This has an Infamous feel to it. I like this idea, so good luck.
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    CF1: Jessica Simpson - by Bulge (~BBW, Dining, ~MWG)

    It wasn't so much I can't see the logic, because you're right. My problem is my opinion on short stories with no plot or character development, and I'm going to leave it that.
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    CF1: Jessica Simpson - by Bulge (~BBW, Dining, ~MWG)

    Just as a friendly discussion, but why does this story fit into this catagory?
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    Flip of a Coin - by IrishBard (~BBW (Multiple), Magic, ~XWG)

    Nice. I like the flow and the sounding wrap-up at the end.
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    ok... why no game WG?

    I'm fairly sure we are talking about the former, not the latter.
  18. T

    ok... why no game WG?

    I remember this one story about a girl that is playing a sims-like game and everytime the avatar puts on weight, and if the girl saves it, the girl put on the weight. Can't remember where I saw it, the author, or the title of the story, but it was very good. As for that new game, please, tell...
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    Wardrobe Changes - by Toby (~BBW, Intrigue, Magic, ~SWG -)

    bbwlover8887, Yeah, the forever changing site is a forum. As for the particular stories you like, I don't know. Check out the Alternate Reality stories. Hope I've been of some help.
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    Wardrobe Changes - by Toby (~BBW, Intrigue, Magic, ~SWG -)

    Thank you very much.
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