I dunno, Obesus. I don't think it's all that bad.Obesus said:I find it a tad odd that this thread has been sitting here for four days with so few responses....it tends to indicate something about our board that has troubled me since day 1...(which would have been Summer, 1999)...the board is really more of a dating clearinghouse that doesn't work than anything else. So rarely do we see posts asking deeper questions or looking for more of a sense of community or support. I know the Internet in general is not really the most appropriate place to get that, but it can work in some circumstances..this just isn't one of them. Unlike the BBW/FA situation, we don't have NAAFA events and there is no focus on fat men....so the first obsession becomes trying to find a relationship...and that has not been a highly successful purpose for this board...it is also not a winning proposition on the Dimensions Matching System, which is heavily loaded in the direction of the BBW/FFA thing again...perchance we should be talking about the whole direction of the community...I am not so sure now, though, that we really have anything more than a quasi-dating service that has historically failed miserably...
There can never be too much fat eye candy
As for me, I'm not a BHM, but a BBW that's looking out for her kid and her loved ones and herself last. I try to be the servant of everyone around me and I receive my due when I get a smile and a thank you
Get me in a dark room under the covers with a handsome man and I'm all about the fun tho
Well if it's any consolation at all, I totally get where you're coming from papa bear. I've kept my mouth shut because I think one rant on the board from me in a week is more than enough. Sorry to say, if I said what I really thought about this subject, it wouldn't be pretty. Thank goodness for missaf for her imput!...for bringing me back to the land of the living! Those who know me out here in the flesh tend to be more aware that I can easily go off on not only tangents but three-hour lectures illustrated with slides and Powerpoint...I tend to get abstracted easily and it takes a gentle hand to lead me back to the world of three dimensions...hmmm...Dimensions....there's a simile! Oops...there I go again!
Someday, some delightful FFA will tame the wild intellectualist beast that I am, but for now, I range the skies at night! LOL
I know the feeling of working to keep everyone else happy and it is something that I fall into too easily...I am too much the "people pleaser", but I am getting better taking care of myself, bunnies, mom and all of my flock of slightly (or massively) disturbed ex-girlfriends. It is a challenge!
Sure. All that really means is that you can count on yourself to feel good when you help others, and also to gratify this feeling. Unlike LaVey, who found some ground for comtempt in this realization, I just take it at face value. People do what they do, but it's good to understand why, as it will make you more content and possibly more successful.missaf said:Altruism really doesn't have a goal in my life though. I do it because it feels like the right thing to do. The happiness that comes from the dilligence and using the gifts I've been given to help people are all a side effect of doing what feels right. I guess in a way it's selfish because I'm doing what "I" feel I need to do, but in the end, I'm always there to help the people in my life, regardless of what I might be feeling.
I look out for #1, but in my case #1 is Sandie.Australian Lord said:This question came up somewhere else, and so I thought to myself, are you a gentleman or are you looking out for number 1 (you and you only)? Any thoughts?
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