BBW millionaire on Bravo's Millionaire Matchmaker

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superodalisque

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This is a very interesting point.

I am still in the process of convincing Robin to come to Dims and explain her side, but in the interim, I want to elaborate on the point Jes made.

Let's assume that she did what she did to get on TV, which I also think she did back in 2008, when she ended up taking legal action against the TSA and Reagan National Airport Security. It got her some press (and I am thinking a fairly large settlement, hence the "millionaire" status). While some of you have called her loony, a few people have taken Jes's position that she is simply getting her 15 minutes of fame.

That brings me to Donna Simpson, which many of you have called loony as well. What if she's simply getting her 15 or 20 minutes in the sun, and financially benefitting from it? This community seems to take a more hostile attitude towards her than it does towards Ms. Kassner. Is it because she isn't Brandeis educated like Ms. Kassner? Perhaps it's because she comes from "US", and there's always this cloud of secrecy within our confines, like we shouldn't share who we are with the outside world? Is it because she's a webmodel? Is it personal with regard to Donna?

Just curious.
maybe its because she says the same kinds of things other web models say but she is one of the very few who can actually support herself with it?
 

superodalisque

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No disrepect to Phil. We are facing major Cognitive Dissonance within the quote-unquote community about HAES vs Feeder/GainerFantasyLand and the mention of Donna Simpson has become a political dog-whistle. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dog-whistle_politics
I DO NOT have the answer. I, okay, if we're going to use the word 'fraud' which I DID NOT... 'Cognitive Dissonance' is less accusatory than 'fraud'.:)
no thats not it. she was also flamed by many feeders and gainers. it had nothing to do with her personally being a feedee. she never said anything in public that hadn't been said on dims by many others, even those who opposed her. maybe its just that she held up a mirror a lot of people didn't want to look into in the mass media. i don't think it would have been any different, if as Phil alluded to, she had gone to Brandeis. i think it just made it hard for people to pretend anymore that they appear to be any cooler than anyone else engaged in the act to the general public. its easier to blame someone for making you appear strange than it is to give yourself the credit of being able to be perceived that way all on your own. she was just a scapegoat for people who don't want to face the fact that the public is prejudiced against them because they don't like what they do and not because of someone else. if they put themselves and their lifestyle out publicly they would have gotten the very same reaction. but its much easier pretend its somehow just Donna.
 

NancyGirl74

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I haven't read all the posts but heres my take...

This chick doesn't represent me just because she's fat and so am I. Just like the dumb blonde on TV doesn't represent blondes everywhere just because they have the same hair color. As far as I'm concerned she's just another 15 minute-er. Let her have her moment but she doesn't speak for me. Heck, I don't think she speaks for herself since she's so misinterpreted.
I got edited! That might be a first for me. I'm oddly honored. Are we not allowed to say the F word any more?
 

Saoirse

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I got edited! That might be a first for me. I'm oddly honored. Are we not allowed to say the F word any more?
I feel like I say it a lot and I don't think they've ever been edited.



Fuck.

Eta: neverfucking mind haha. Totes get edited.
 

tonynyc

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I mean like...one for me personally lol

Rowan;
I have faith that you'll snag that Bodybuilder/Weightlifting/Powerlifting admirer all your own..
I got edited! That might be a first for me. I'm oddly honored. Are we not allowed to say the F word any more?
Nancy: you know the NFL and most sport threads on DIMS are curse free zones .. also add Hyde Park :happy:
 

Shosh

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I thought people would be tired of these type of "reality" shows, which are in fact fake and staged.
Told you it was fake and staged. Now we hear as much directly from the horses mouth so to speak.

I feel sorry for Robin for all that she has been put through.

I also think it is harsh that some people feel that they can judge her. Like you are perfect. Yeah right.

Maybe people will be more discerning about what they choose to watch.
 

joswitch

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Considering the $$$$ fees- hopefully those members with less than wonderful experiences were able to freeze their accounts

“…Men (the money makers) must pay fees in order to join the exclusive matchmaking club. The memberships start at $25,000 , and go up from there based on add-ons. There are additional fees to have Patti as your matchmaker, to have the Millionaire Club give you a make-over, and numerous other add-ons.
For $25,000, the Millionaire's club will give you:
• One year of unlimited dating nationally throughout the US/Canada
• 1 hour date coaching session with the dating coach in your area
• 1 hour relationship counseling session with the relationship counselor in your area
• 1 hour image consulting session with the image consultant in your area
• 1 hour hypnotherapy session with the hypnotherapist in your area
• 2 month freeze (you can put your membership on hold up to 2 months if you meet a match .)”


Source
Millionaire Matchmaker
Cos millionaires have such a hard time dating that they need clunky "coaching". Also I make that about $6,000 per hour for services. Nice money if you can get it.
 

NancyGirl74

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I feel like I say it a lot and I don't think they've ever been edited.



Fuck.

Eta: neverfucking mind haha. Totes get edited.
Nancy: you know the NFL and most sport threads on DIMS are curse free zones .. also add Hyde Park :happy:
The funning thing is I never swear. Maybe a "damn" here and there but the F-bomb? I never use it! When I finally drop the bomb it gets swept away before impact. Fuck it...Who gives a fuck, anyway. ;)

I feel sorry for Robin for all that she has been put through. *snipped*
I don't feel sorry for her because unless they held a gun to her head and said, "You must say these things" she wasn't forced to do anything. She made a choice. She might regret that choice and feel the need to backpedal to justify her actions but in no way was she forced to do or say those things. We all do and say things we regret later. If that's the case then yes, I can be sorry for that. Otherwise, anyone who goes on "reality" TV and walks away looking bad these days should not be shocked. Every other week someone is on some sort of news show professing their ignorance about how TV editors, producers, directors, or whoever misled them into a false self portrayal. If people don't get that by now and still decide to give it a go than I say, "Oh well...Live and let learn." Clearly they can't be taught by the actions of others. Go ahead, try it for yourself. If you're lucky you'll have success. If not you'll be just another Millionaire Fat Girl trying to explain away why you look like a fool on TV. While I know it seems unsympathetic of me...I just don't feel sorry for people who do something deliberately foolish and then try to explain away the consequences by blaming others for their actions. You made the mistake. Own it. You might get a little more respect if you do.
 

toni

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Told you it was fake and staged. Now we hear as much directly from the horses mouth so to speak.

I feel sorry for Robin for all that she has been put through.

I also think it is harsh that some people feel that they can judge her. Like you are perfect. Yeah right.

Maybe people will be more discerning about what they choose to watch.
We aren't judging her. We are judging what she put in front of us on national television. No one made her go on that show, no one made her say she was thinking of giving her dog botox, no one made her offer to buy that dude a car because he was hot. That was all her. I don't feel bad for her. Fat or skinny, she acted like an ass on TV. It is okay to discuss every other annoying person on TV. Why not her?

Her reasoning behind going on the show doesn't matter to me. I think instead of giving her a forum to explain herself, we should explain to her that she played right into the stereotype we are all trying to change. Fat women are dumb, easy, frumpy and desperate. We need to let her know she did every fat woman a disservice by playing that role and not using her 15 minutes in the limelight to come off as a smart, fat, confident, business woman.
 

bigsexy920

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Cant Rep you but its so true. This could be any person but it wasn't it was her and she happily played into what was a perfect example of what many people think of "fat girls" in general. How is this about acceptance, or helping fat people.

She went on the show to be part of a "SHOW" and she was. She was made to look like an ass and she basically said that she knew that it was going to happen but she did it anyway.

As I said before and Nancy said something similar, there is such thing as free will no one put a gun to her head. You put yourself out there for the world to see.. Guess what, people are going to judge you.

I really don't get the importance of her having to post here to explain herself. The explanation hasn't done anything to make me see her in a better light.

I don't know how disagreeing on something like this would make people lash out, its ok for for grown people to disagree and still be friends, its called being an adult.

We aren't judging her. We are judging what she put in front of us on national television. No one made her go on that show, no one made her say she was thinking of giving her dog botox, no one made her offer to buy that dude a car because he was hot. That was all her. I don't feel bad for her. Fat or skinny, she acted like an ass on TV. It is okay to discuss every other annoying person on TV. Why not her?

Her reasoning behind going on the show doesn't matter to me. I think instead of giving her a forum to explain herself, we should explain to her that she played right into the stereotype we are all trying to change. Fat women are dumb, easy, frumpy and desperate. We need to let her know she did every fat woman a disservice by playing that role and not using her 15 minutes in the limelight to come off as a smart, fat, confident, business woman.
 

LillyBBBW

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I haven't read all the posts but heres my take...

This chick doesn't represent me just because she's fat and so am I. Just like the dumb blonde on TV doesn't represent blondes everywhere just because they have the same hair color. As far as I'm concerned she's just another 15 minute-er. Let her have her moment but she doesn't speak for me. Heck, I don't think she speaks for herself since she's so misinterpreted.
A agree. It just seems like every time a fat person does something we all jump up and go, "ME ME ME!?!?!!" Unless it's something good of course. Go ahead and judge her behavior but truthfully, it's not different than anything you would see on 'Jersey Shore' or what I've seen on a night on the town in Boston: A party girl who's out to have a good time and says outrageous things to attract attention to herself and get a guy to remember her. If you've never flashed your boobs in NOLA you don't know what you're missing, 'cause of course only fat people do this kind of thing - or they're not allowed because they're fat. The same old saw.

As far as the whole thing being a cruel set up via the network, I don't know about that. It may or may not be true but I hear stuff like that coming from SO many reality TV walking-disasters that nothing would surprise me. It certainly doesn't make me want to be on one. Do you know anyone who's been on a reality TV show who has anything positive to say about their portrayal? I don't know what the story is there but I don't think that makes much difference in the big picture anyway. Her existance and stupidity isn't about us. Did she get on TV and SAY, "I am fat and I represent fat people,"? That chick Patty or whatever her name is seems to be the only person fostering hate speech and stereotypes if one is inclined to even find weight in what she says.
 

gobettiepurple

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Here is what I thought about my episode of the Millionaire Matchmaker. I think the show misrepresented me and edited me into someone I am not. What I want you guys to know is, as a plus size woman, you can live the life of your dreams, date plenty of great guys, be a successful businessperson and create your own path in life, no matter what the Patti Stangers of the world say. Live your best life right now. Don't put it off one more second or wait till you lose 10 pounds. Life your best life starting ASAP! Much love xoxo...Robin :)

What was your reaction to the episode?

I knew it was going to be bad but did didn't know it was going to be that bad and a 100 percent work of fiction. They followed me for three weeks and spliced and diced the episode into what I wasn't. It was both misogynistic and against curvy women.

They told Luke to be nasty to me. They told him to be obnoxious, that was his role. I never said I wanted to have sex with him, they dubbed that in. I never offered him sex or a hand job. Me and Patti were talking about sex, and they dubbed that in to the middle of my date. I never bought him dinner (the date was comped on the boat) and never offered to give him money to start a business. What I said is that I own a successful PR firm so if he starts a business I could do publicity for him and make it successful.

What happened with you and Luke?

I ended up dating him for two months. We went on vacation together. Dana and John Bonjourno only went on two dates. They told them to kiss on camera. When they went out on real dates he didn't kiss her.

What did you think of the show's portrayal of you?

The way they edited it, the message is if you are a curvy girl, theres no way in hell you can get a hot guy. That is so untrue! I'm not superficial, I've dated guys that are better looking than me and worse looking. I get guys all the time (as do you lovely voluptuous ladies) so the way they portrayed me as desperate, needy and trying to buy a hottie was perpetuating a bad stereotype and just plain untrue.

Were you drunk during the episode?

They kept ordering me alcohol. They ordered the two bottles of pink champagne. They dubbed in the two drink maximum after the fact.

What did you think of Patti's visible distaste about your figure?

I thought it was horrible. Patti was a plus size girl less than a year ago. She's not exactly the hottest thing since sliced bread. The thing is I want women to know, if you're curvy and voluptuous you can get the hot guy, live the life of your dreams, be successful. I know I'm overweight, its not that I'm in fantasy-land and I don't know that, but there are men out there who l love plus size women, real boobs, real hips.

A lot of the women on the show are silicone stick figures. I am not for everyone but I find very masculine men don't love women who have the bodytype of little boys. They love hips and curves!

She is really tougher on women. This whole season she's just been bashing women, she thinks if shes tough on women she gets better ratings. How much can you watch her insult us?

She thought I was an easy target. I gave her plenty of fun material with my whole pink Hello Kitty lifestyle that she didn't have to call me names. Say I shop at Lane Bryant or that Lane Bryant should find me a boyfriend? I shop at Bloomingdales!! She acted like she was in shock that men at the interview said they preferred curves. She wants to say men would never love a curvy woman, but she's sadly mistaken.

Do you think it would have been different had you been an overweight millionaire not millionairess?

She's had a bunch of larger men (like Jason Davis) and she doesn't make it an issue at all. She certainly doesn't call them names, she doesn't question the ability of a chubby man to get a hot girl. I have a cool personality, I have a lot to bring to the table. I'm a plus size girl but not unattractive. I don't lack a dating life. I'm not going to let Patti Stanger determine my self worth because who is Patti Stanger?

http://blogcritics.org/culture/article/interview-millionairess-robin-kassner-ceo-of/
It is unfortunate that the following circumstances that you describe above, coupled with other things [including Patti Stangers' usually nastiness toward anything that she doesn't like] made an episode that people felt so compelled to attack you for on a personal level. As if it is your responsibility to bear the weight of everyone else's projected feelings about size acceptance or whatever euphamism you want to use.

Although, I have to wonder what would make someone such as yourself inclined to even appear on Patti's show. She has no problem pimping out larger men, but she is constantly ridiculing women for their size - if one has ever watched an episode [as i must admit, during my unemployment, have had the pleasure of several hours of boredom and nothing to fill it], there are several episodes where Patti turns down girls during the interview process bc they are "too fat" or "chunky".

Perhaps Patti should be the one to apologize and she should feature plus size people more often and without the snarkiness - i mean, as if we don't know we are fat and need to be reminded.

Hopefully, people will give you the benefit of the doubt regarding the circumstances that were somewhat beyond your control and I wish you luck in love and success in the future!
 

tonynyc

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The funning thing is I never swear. Maybe a "damn" here and there but the F-bomb? I never use it! When I finally drop the bomb it gets swept away before impact. Fuck it...Who gives a fuck, anyway. ;)

...anyone who goes on "reality" TV and walks away looking bad these days should not be shocked.
And the say WWE is the best in sports entertainment and heck if it wasn't a train wreck .... who would give a shit

And by the way you've restored my faith in humanity with the F-Bomb- I love it when BBW curse... :wubu:

Now those Jets better do the fucking job in New England and win the game
 

LillyBBBW

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And the say WWE is the best in sports entertainment and heck if it wasn't a train wreck .... who would give a shit

And by the way you've restored my faith in humanity with the F-Bomb- I love it when BBW curse... :wubu:

Now those Jets better do the fucking job in New England and win the game
*takes deep breath* ~!!!BLASPHEMY!!!!~

*runs over to the NFL thread*
 

LillyBBBW

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It is unfortunate that the following circumstances that you describe above, coupled with other things [including Patti Stangers' usually nastiness toward anything that she doesn't like] made an episode that people felt so compelled to attack you for on a personal level. As if it is your responsibility to bear the weight of everyone else's projected feelings about size acceptance or whatever euphamism you want to use.

Although, I have to wonder what would make someone such as yourself inclined to even appear on Patti's show. She has no problem pimping out larger men, but she is constantly ridiculing women for their size - if one has ever watched an episode [as i must admit, during my unemployment, have had the pleasure of several hours of boredom and nothing to fill it], there are several episodes where Patti turns down girls during the interview process bc they are "too fat" or "chunky".

Perhaps Patti should be the one to apologize and she should feature plus size people more often and without the snarkiness - i mean, as if we don't know we are fat and need to be reminded.

Hopefully, people will give you the benefit of the doubt regarding the circumstances that were somewhat beyond your control and I wish you luck in love and success in the future!
I agree. I'm afraid you fell victim to the same old bait and switch scheme that many other fat people in this community have experienced. The same thing was done to my dear friend Deeds last year when she in good faith agreed to appear on a reality TV show. They befriended and followed her and her friends around only to portray them in the worst possible way in the end. It was a disappointment. Eight times out of ten this is what happens making us all leery when being approached by television people who come here all the time trolling for people to appear on their shows. The red flag is when they make you sign a piece of paper that innocently gives them the power to characterize you any way that's profitable to them with no threat of legal action. I think you have the right idea though. Who the hell is this Patti person? Deeds managed to survive her encounter and is doing well despite the actions of that unscrupulous network and so will you.
 

Dr. P Marshall

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So she's shallow and isn't interested in suitable long-term prospects (such as, the ex-cop who showed an actual interest in her). So what? We don't have to agree with her choices in order to acknowledge that they are rational ones (maybe just not ones we'd make). Do you feel the same level of contempt for the ancient, wrinkled, wealthy men of the world who somehow manage to convince themselves that young, beautiful women want them for studly prowess as opposed to the attractive bulge of their checkbooks?

She's an attractive woman, she's wealthy, and chances are extremely good that she'll get exactly what she advertises for. I don't think it's fair for us -- generally speaking, not referring to anything you've said, Fish -- to claim that she's giving other women, particularly big women, a bad name or that she's insecure because she's fat. Seems to me, she knows what she wants: a handsome stud to service her. To that end: You go, fat girl. Take those millions you got from the TSA settlement and buy yourself all the arm candy you want.
I haven't read through this whole thread yet, but this was sort of my take on it too. If anything, she reminded me more of other young, shallow female millionaires, like Paris Hilton, than of some stereotype of a desperate fat woman. I also thought that it was pretty straightforward, she's shallow, he's shallow and the interaction between them went accordingly. He knew she wanted sex and she knew he wanted money and it really didn't seem any more complicated than that. But I don't watch the show and so I have no idea what this Patti person's take on women or fat women is in general.
 

gobettiepurple

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I haven't read through this whole thread yet, but this was sort of my take on it too. If anything, she reminded me more of other young, shallow female millionaires, like Paris Hilton, than of some stereotype of a desperate fat woman. I also thought that it was pretty straightforward, she's shallow, he's shallow and the interaction between them went accordingly. He knew she wanted sex and she knew he wanted money and it really didn't seem any more complicated than that. But I don't watch the show and so I have no idea what this Patti person's take on women or fat women is in general.
In response, I think it is safe to say that patti stanger [sp?] is anti-fat women, and whether or not she is anti-fat men is debatable. however, the problem I now have with the show is that they are really just a prostitution ring, because if we are exchanging money for sex.

why, then, as a premise for her show, is patti always talking about her show as "monogamy first" and how she has class and never condones the sort of lecherous behavior of typical dating service, i.e, creating the opportunity for booty calls. I mean, the millionaires on the show do get the service gratis, but its doesn't bode well for her actual clients that are, in reality, looking for decent people, and not "gold digging" bitches of the male or female perspective. based on her show and its antics, I have to wonder how patti stanger has any success and why people would actually use her services.

I stopped watching her show for that exact reason - Patti is annoying and she doesn't stand up for anything accept free publicity and making a buck, while pretending to be upholding a virtuous ideal of creating lasting love bonds. If you are selling sex, then sell it, don't put a bow and some rougue on it and call it something else.
 

superodalisque

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In response, I think it is safe to say that patti stanger [sp?] is anti-fat women, and whether or not she is anti-fat men is debatable. however, the problem I now have with the show is that they are really just a prostitution ring, because if we are exchanging money for sex.

why, then, as a premise for her show, is patti always talking about her show as "monogamy first" and how she has class and never condones the sort of lecherous behavior of typical dating service, i.e, creating the opportunity for booty calls. I mean, the millionaires on the show do get the service gratis, but its doesn't bode well for her actual clients that are, in reality, looking for decent people, and not "gold digging" bitches of the male or female perspective. based on her show and its antics, I have to wonder how patti stanger has any success and why people would actually use her services.

I stopped watching her show for that exact reason - Patti is annoying and she doesn't stand up for anything accept free publicity and making a buck, while pretending to be upholding a virtuous ideal of creating lasting love bonds. If you are selling sex, then sell it, don't put a bow and some rougue on it and call it something else.
i'm not so sure that catering to people's preferences is prostitution. its what the people she introduces do with the opportunity that counts. when a friend intros a friend to someone she thinks they'll like is she pimping them out? beyond her own judgment and advice what else is a businesswoman to do? i think its too much responsibility to lay on somebody else for the thing the participants are personally responsible for--their reaction to a situation. if they can only deal with another human being only on a sexual level no wonder they need professional advice. they might be more in need of a psychologist than a matchmaker though.

i personally agree that monogamy is important to making the kinds of bonds necessary in a long termed relationship. i think it keeps out all of the unnecessary distractions from people actually getting to know each other and keeps situations from becoming a perpetual impersonal meat market. but does that mean people are asexual? IMO i think thats the main problem people are often having making matches. its an all or none proposition and people forget the fun of delayed gratification. and yes relationships can actually be fun and sexy -- hopefully. but i really wonder how it is a matchmakers responsibility if the people she introduces go over some imaginary respect line. actually thats why they have to pay her. they've been down the same road and maybe they need someone to be blunt and say what needs to be said for a change. after all people with cash get catered to all of the time on a personal level. no wonder so many become so socially inept. so i guess maybe the train wrecks are good advertising since they give the matchmaker the chance to show that she will go there. sometimes people are just looking to pay someone with the balls to actually do it.

not personally aimed at you but just thinking out loud: i find it interesting that anytime something happens that makes a fat person or other fat people by extension look bad it always seems important that someone else totally not responsible for the actions seems to become an open target. its as though fat people aren't capable of making their own choices and sometimes even a mistake. IMO i think it might be a good idea to watch the tendency we can have sometimes to make the skinny the bad guy as a distraction.
 

gobettiepurple

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i'm not so sure that catering to people's preferences is prostitution. {QUOTE]

thats not what I said at all . . . if you watched the show as much as I did, then you would understand what references I was making. Patti Stanger is a hypocrite . . . that's my point, because she preteaches "no sex before monogamy" and yet what Robin says in her defense of her actions on the show prove that Patti Stanger isn't all that she appears to be.

She isn't a friend introducing a friend, real millionaire clients [the ones hwo pay for her service, not the ones on the show] are PAYING for a service. And she supposedly says things like "no sex before monogamy" when that is not the case. Someone has to be held responsible, THATS WHAT SHE IS PAID TO DO.

Plus, if you read what Robin said, then you wouldn't be saying that she is trying to blame someone else. She isn't. I took issue with Patti Stanger and her lies, not Robin.

I would also like to state that I am not personally attacking you and I didn't take your comments as a personal attack - so we are all clear. I just think he misunderstood me, which is your option to do as this is a free country, and I feel the need to respond because I was obviously unclear in my previous posts about what I take issue with Patti Stanger for.
 

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