For as long as I can remember, I have loved and been deeply attracted to indulgence, being fat, and also admiring the beauty of larger women of different shapes and sizes. Since I was young, I felt as though it was a part of myself I always had to hide, as it is so counter cultural to our society...and being different is frowned upon. We are taught that fat is automatically unhealthy, and that being thin (and preferring thin partners) is healthy and desirable. I also had a family that, although Italian by heritage, fed into this and made me feel different, ugly, and somehow less than worthy because I was always on the heavy side, and although I was always healthy, had a BIG appetite and enjoyed eating. Later on, I was also ridiculed for dating and seeking relationships with heavier women, whom I thought were beautiful...and had to be afraid of introducing them to certain family members because of the negativity. Needless to say, I was the square peg that never fit into the round hole. Through the years, I also secretly loved cartoons, comic strips, and TV shows that would feature eating, weight gain, and the lifestyle of indulgence. As the years went on, I knew more and more that, no matter how much I fought it...this was me, and I couldn't be someone I wasn't to please others. I lost and gained a bit over the years, quite a few times, and even had a brief relationship with a woman who was also curious about gaining. We were together for a short time, and we both put on a few, mostly from sheer indulgence (we both loved to cook). Fun memories! I believe it was that relationship, and also thanks to communities like this, that I finally got the courage to go for it...to be who I so deeply desire to be. It's been only a couple of weeks on the journey now...but feels amazing so far. Its a delightful mixture of being arousing, thrilling, and immensely liberating. How does everyone here prefer to gain? Is it simply enjoying whatever you want, whenever the mood strikes? Or is it more of a slow and steady process...a mixture of healthy and indulgent foods...with the occasional stuffing session? I'm thinking for me, so far, I'm really loving a combination of both. I enjoy days (especially this past week), of really going for it...just to see how much my always insatiable appetite can really handle. SO much fun!! Insane amount of calories already today, and it's not even dinner time! LOL But I also want to stay healthy too. I briskly walk a mile every day, and love indulging in healthier foods as well. Interested in hearing other people's stories and experiences...It's great to be a part of this community!