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Guys Who Like Fat Chicks: Village Voice Article

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Tina

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Felicia, I feel that you've put things in many of your posts here in a way that has been divisive and insulting where it really needn't have been, but I feel like I get some of what you're saying, even if our requirements are different.

When you take society's messages to people in general and women specifically, it reads out to play that -- just as a starting point -- beauty cannot be attained without thinness, and that thin = beautiful. From there it filters down to large breasts> large lips> large ass (proportionately) but with a small waist> "I just got fucked" fluffy hair> practically hairless twat> basically, women should look like a Hollywood actress/stripper combination. Even if individuals don't see it that way, it's the overall message being internalized by males and females from the youngest of ages. And I think it's pretty much well known by now that even those who are thin and conventionally beautiful still question themselves, their bodies and looks, because it's really never enough, is it. We have been just plain mind-fucked about our looks for generations. So I get your argument that it wouldn't be a bad thing for fat women to be seen as beautiful (as in "fat women are generally more beautiful to me than thin women") and not just fuckable or a viable form to lust after. But rather, something more poetic. I don't need to see that myself in order to think the article is a good thing, though.

And Jos, I believe that, in generalizing, women are seen more as the sexual vessel and men are more seen as the wallet. We had James Gandolfini on the cover of Details magazine some years ago, being touted as a male sex symbol. No one has ever done that with, say, Camryn Manheim on the cover of Cosmo.

Traci I totally agree re: picking everything apart. It's serving no one, really, IMO.
 

Fox

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So if I cringe at the thought of being seen in public with my dark-skinned husband, who speaks with an accent and looks vaguely like one of THOSE dark-skinned people from THAT terrorist-breeding country, who is the asshole? Him, for being dark? Or me, for being a trembling namby-pamby?
And should my husband be made to understand that his dark skin and accent might make me uncomfortable? Hell, people might POINT and STARE or even worse, LAUGH at me because they can't believe that I find my dark, maybe Middle Eastern (!) husband attractive.

Fuck society and fuck respect by society. The above part of the FA experience I cannot stand. I have vague, luke-warmish empathy for kids struggling to come to terms with what is "different" about them, since the herd mentality is difficult to overcome for people who are just learning about individuality and how much ridicule hurts. I have none, not one shred, for adults. Get over yourself. By now, you should have realized that society is made up of all sorts of people with all manner of ill-informed and ignorance-based biases. You can allow your fear of their judgment to influence how you live your life, or you can figuratively (and quite literally) tell society to go fuck itself and get on with whatever YOU find meaningful.

And if you've already worked this out for yourself, and you're dating the fat women of your dreams, then I'd like to know why the peanuts gallery is still even a point of discussion for you. Or why you'd expect the fat women of your dreams to be understanding of how poor, pitiful you got teased for liking fat girls because <gasp> "society" says that fat girls aren't beautiful. Substitute "black" for "fat" and then read your own example back to yourself. Maybe, just maybe, you'll get it.
Whoa, whoa whoa! Cool your guns, chika! That was when I was like 14. At that time, I still WAS a kid. If you ask me, I don't care what people think these days. I like to throw ideas around on how our community could be more active in society or accepted, but if nobody ends up accepting me except for one amazing woman, then society can just go suck it.

SuperO implied that I'd be more socially acceptable if I called fat women beautiful. I brought up that example to show her otherwise. It's not just some random sob story to get her to feel sorry for me. It's nothing but a part of my experiences in this life. I had assumed that if I shared an experience of my own (relative to the topic), I'd appear more human to you. If you hadn't noticed, people often come to this site and share their experience with life. Everyone else shares their experience, whether it be positive or negative, and so have I. For real. Look at me. Look at the way I dress. Do you really think I spend my days sobbing about what society thinks about me? Really?
 

FA Punk

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the point is that evidently women's opinions don't seem to matter do they? most of the people reading the voice are also not a part of this community. thats your audience. and why do they "of course" have to find the subject matter insulting when they were all set to read something positive about themselves. they wanted that. what they found instead was just another way to get disrespected. thats the bottom line. it wasn't the reference to body parts that bothered them. it was the lack of reference to nearly anything else from the guys that they did not like.
I never said once the opinions of wemen don't matter so don't put words in my mouth SuperO, I'm sorry but having a group of your friends over that you know are going to agree with you about this article really isn't all that unbiased. And where are you getting this ''My audience'' from!? I don't read the Village Voice weekly, and in fact this is the first I have ever read it period! So again your off base. And once more what upsets you is that these guys didn't say what you wanted them to say, so there you go:rolleyes:.


its only pointless when we put walls up. i'm all for guys being able to say what they like. all i'm saying is that you have to be realistic and not expect people to agree with you all of the time or accept what you like if you aren't willing to follow the rules of that game. the outside world is not dims. if you always need to have it totally your way there is generally a price to pay. if its more important to expound only on body parts people are going to look at you in a particular way so its best to get used to it and not whine about it.
Hahaha, things become pointless on the internet when you start arguing on web fourms like this one, it just turns into one of those ''He said/She said'' type of things. ''i'm all for guys being able to say what they like''...Yeah, I'll buy that for a dollor, as long as it's worded just the way you like it;)! Oh and I do live in the real world by the way SuperO, and I more then understand that not everyone is going to agree with me in what I have to say but hearing that coming from you is rather silly IMO since I'll you've been trying to do for the last couple of days in this thread is get people to agree with you and get them to join your side, sorry but that dog just don't hunt.
 

superodalisque

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i want to apologize to Kevin N. he did describe the little girl who gave him his first squish. his part of the article was really nice. sorry if i painted that part of the article as something it was not. i hope other FAs will follow your lead and not forget to express everything a fat person has to offer:)
 

Sweetie

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The whole point of the article was that, contrary to what the media tell us, fat bodies are physically very attractive to some people.

Of course it follows that to be physically attracted to another person opens the door to possible romantic love and deeper connections. But that was not the point of the article.

The point of the article was to make unknowing people aware of a phenomenon (if you want to call it that) of which they were previously unaware -- i.e., that fat is beautiful (at least in th eyes of certain beholders).

We here in our own fat-happy world forget how shocking a concept that still is to much of society.
I'm one of those who was SHOCKED...IN A GOOD WAY. I wish that someone had written it 30 years ago so that I wouldn't have spent my entire adult life up til now hating my body and thinking that it was absolutely offensive. The only reason I even found this forum is because someone who means a great deal to me has been calling me "sexy" for the past few months. I thought they were just being kind because I KNOW THEY LOVE ME AS A FRIEND. So totally unaware was I that I actually GOOGLED "DO MEN REALLY LIKE FAT WOMEN?" and was stunned at the amount of FAT PORN there is out there, and the EXISTENCE OF DIMS...and that there are people out there who might consider MY BODY BEAUTIFUL, SEXY, AROUSING, AND ALL THOSE OTHER WORDS I NEVER THOUGHT WOULD APPLY TO ME!!! Sorry for the shouting but this is life-altering knowledge for me. :)
 

krystalltuerme

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I'm one of those who was SHOCKED...IN A GOOD WAY. I wish that someone had written it 30 years ago so that I wouldn't have spent my entire adult life up til now hating my body and thinking that it was absolutely offensive. The only reason I even found this forum is because someone who means a great deal to me has been calling me "sexy" for the past few months. I thought they were just being kind because I KNOW THEY LOVE ME AS A FRIEND. So totally unaware was I that I actually GOOGLED "DO MEN REALLY LIKE FAT WOMEN?" and was stunned at the amount of FAT PORN there is out there, and the EXISTENCE OF DIMS...and that there are people out there who might consider MY BODY BEAUTIFUL, SEXY, AROUSING, AND ALL THOSE OTHER WORDS I NEVER THOUGHT WOULD APPLY TO ME!!! Sorry for the shouting but this is life-altering knowledge for me. :)
We're glad you're here. Hopefully the guy who was calling you "sexy" is worth getting to know on a new level?
 

rickydaniels

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Well it's about damn time! I really liked this article. Finally someone writes about it in the right way. I think that I related to Dan and Lawrence the most. Some guys just have a type. My brother likes curvy(not fat) blondes with tan skin (I tease him that he likes fake and bakes). I tend to like fat brunettes or redheads with fair skin. I've always kinda been like that. Rarely have I dated outside of that since I've openly been "out" as a guy that likes fat girls/women. After reading this article I took a look at some of my own BBW art and noticed most of the girls I drew were fair skinned and dark haired. (not to self: bring more ethicity to my art; that'd be cool!) I often collect bbw pics as reference to draw from and a majority of them were the same. I've been accused of having a "fetish" before and I've explained; much like the article says; Fetish are for things and fat girls are not things, Leather or panties; those is things. Lastly, it was so cool to see that a blog that I followed. "Ask a guy who likes Fat Chicks" in the Village Voice. I was stoked when I read it off his blog and I'm glad that someone posted it up here.
 
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joswitch

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Well it's about damn time! I really liked this article. Finally someone writes about it in the right way. I think that I related to Dan and Lawrence the most. Some guys just have a type. My brother likes curvy(not fat) blondes with tan skin (I tease him that he likes fake and bakes). I tend to like fat brunettes or redheads with fair skin. I've always kinda been like that. Rarely have I dated outside of that since I've openly been "out" as a guy that likes fat girls/women. After reading this article I took a look at some of my own BBW art and noticed most of the girls I drew were fair skinned and dark haired. (not to self: bring more ethicity to my art; that'd be cool!) I often collect bbw pics as reference to draw from and a majority of them were the same. I've been accused of having a "fetish" before and I've explained; much like the article says; Fetish are for things and fat girls are not things, Leather or panties; those is things. Lastly, it was so cool to see that a blog that I followed. "Ask a guy who likes Fat Chicks" in the Village Voice. I was stoked when I read it off his blog and I'm glad that someone posted it up here.
^Exactly. :D:D
 

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