I hate losing a BHM

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Isla620

Regional Unicorn
Joined
Jan 28, 2010
Messages
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In my internet wanderings today I came across the morgue photo of the still-unidentified man who jumped to his death from the back of the Staten Island ferry in early January of 2009.

He was a BHM. Or at least my definition of a BHM. Plump cheeks, marvelous chubby neck and double-chin. The photo showed his face only, but I can extrapolate the rest. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and to me he was beautiful, receding hairline and all.

The rational side of me understands how the suicide choice happens. But when it comes to BHMs, I'm not always rational. So, in this case it's like trying to understand why a breathtaking sunrise would want to scrub itself from the sky, or why a priceless Fabergé egg would want to take a hammer to itself. The FFA in me just doesn't comprehend.

Fat guys shouldn't be jumping over ferry railings into the bitter, cold water; they should be living, breathing, smiling, laughing, making love, getting belly rubs. To see even one gone before his time just rips me up. I adore BHMs and find it so incredibly unfair that there's no easy way to conjure up an FFA for those of you who don't already have one. If I could, I would somehow splinter myself -- my FFA self -- and send a piece to each of you. One moment I feel this so strongly and my heart gets so full it could burst, and in the next moment I chastise myself for what seems like selfish silliness. I suppose only a small fraction of a woman is a rather thoughtless, useless gift. You all deserve so much more than that.

So, here I am sitting and crying over this guy. This dead BHM without a name.

Fat guys, I love you all. Don't any of you dare jump. Maybe you don't realize it, but there's this fire you guys have in you. It's so strong and primal. I see it in your eyes when you post photos of yourselves. It's what attracts me. I can't help myself; I'm like a moth. Please don't ever purposely extinguish the fire that makes me dance.

My world is dimmer when I lose one of you. Even if I never knew your name.
 

extra_fat_guy

Bringing sexy back!!!!!!!
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
Messages
552
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Here
That is so sad. I know at times I had thought about doing the very same thing. I guess in many ways dims has helped me more than I realize. I know its sad to say that about a website, but until I found this place I didn't have any hope. I do have hope I will find my FFA or that she will find me.
 

nolon2020

Member
Joined
Mar 8, 2009
Messages
16
Location
,
I was moved by your writing and I say thank you.

However it is very hard to keep up hope if no source of hope is around.

A lot of women where I live consider fat men as ugly and sick so it is

rather hard to build up any self esteem in the first place.
 

comfy_chap

Member
Joined
Mar 20, 2010
Messages
8
Location
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I too was moved by your writing and second nolon2020. Very sad to hear of the poor guy that jumped to his death, I can empathise with him.

Fat guys, I love you all. Don't any of you dare jump. Maybe you don't realize it, but there's this fire you guys have in you. It's so strong and primal. I see it in your eyes when you post photos of yourselves. It's what attracts me. I can't help myself; I'm like a moth. Please don't ever purposely extinguish the fire that makes me dance.
Thanks for that statement at the end Isla620, cheered me up ...
 

Buffetbelly

Nosh, destroyer of snacks
Joined
Dec 2, 2005
Messages
782
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Relationships Between Obesity and DSM-IV Major Depressive Disorder, Suicide Ideation, and Suicide Attempts: Results From a General Population Study
Objectives.


This study sought to
test the relationships between relative
body weight and clinical depression,
suicide ideation, and suicide attempts in
an adult US general population sample.
Methods.


Respondents were 40086
African American and White participants
interviewed in a national survey.
Outcome measures were past-year major
depression, suicide ideation, and suicide
attempts diagnosed according to the
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of
Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition


. The
primary predictor was relative body
weight, treated both continuously (i.e.,
body mass index [BMI]) and categorically
in logistic regression analyses.
Covariates included age, income and
education, disease status, and drug and
alcohol use.
Results.


Relative body weight was
associated with major depression, suicide
attempts, and suicide ideation,
although relationships were different
for men and women. Among women,
increased BMI was associated with
both major depression and suicide
ideation. Among men, lower BMI was
associated with major depression, suicide
attempts, and suicide ideation.
There were no racial differences.
Conclusions.


Differences in BMI,
or weight status, were associated with
the probability of past-year major
depression, suicide attempts, and suicide
ideation. Longitudinal studies are
needed to differentiate the causal pathways
and mechanisms linking physical
and psychiatric conditions. (
Am J Public Health. 2000;90:251–257)


 
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