Is BBW the most PC term?

Dimensions Magazine

Help Support Dimensions Magazine:

patmcf

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2010
Messages
177
Location
,
In the past year I have been very open about my preference for BBW's. Friends, family, and skinny suitors are all aware of what has become an exclusive preference. Its what I am, its what I like and I am happy with it. As I am just now having the pleasure of dating BBW's, I have much to learn. My first question is what do prefer to be called? I know labeling someone isn't necessarily the most positive thing, however, I find it difficult to avoid this when size is what I am attracted to. A follow up question would be: is it alright to tell a girl I am attracted to her because of her size?

Thanks.
 

spiritangel

AmandaClause
Joined
Mar 1, 2010
Messages
9,407
Location
,
Amanda :), cause thats my name so I preffer to be called by that

I have no problem with the fact I am considered an SSBBW, I am comfortable in my own skin and owning the fact I am fat,

Still preffer to be thought of as myself though rather than a label but that could just be me
 

Keb

Princess
Joined
Jun 8, 2007
Messages
924
Location
,
Personally, I'd rather be told I'm beautiful as opposed to being told my size is attractive. There are other women my size, and I've got nothing against them, but if someone is courting me, I'd prefer to be the only woman on his mind. So...while it's fine to like her size, like HER first, last, and above all else. The whole thing. The brain, the voice, the bod, the moves. I'm not just a BBW. I'm Keb. If all that attracts you to me is my size, then what happens if I get smaller/bigger? What happens if a more bountiful woman walks in? Granted, I'm probably somewhat insecure, but...I'd rather be one of a kind. My size is part of who I am, but it's far from the whole picture.
 

spiritangel

AmandaClause
Joined
Mar 1, 2010
Messages
9,407
Location
,
Personally, I'd rather be told I'm beautiful as opposed to being told my size is attractive. There are other women my size, and I've got nothing against them, but if someone is courting me, I'd prefer to be the only woman on his mind. So...while it's fine to like her size, like HER first, last, and above all else. The whole thing. The brain, the voice, the bod, the moves. I'm not just a BBW. I'm Keb. If all that attracts you to me is my size, then what happens if I get smaller/bigger? What happens if a more bountiful woman walks in? Granted, I'm probably somewhat insecure, but...I'd rather be one of a kind. My size is part of who I am, but it's far from the whole picture.

Here here well said, :)
 

Fallenangel2904

Fat Fashionista
Joined
Apr 15, 2009
Messages
757
Location
,
I agree first and foremost I want someone to like me for the person that I am above all. I don't want someone who is solely interested in my fat obviously, and not the person that comes with it. That goes with out saying. Lets face it though, people have preferences and physical attraction obviously plays a big part in what leads you to someone. If a person is- say attracted to red hair on a mate, its not to say that ALL red heads would do it for them, but it would be the physical attribute that would lead them to be interested in that person.

I'm getting off the topic here, but anyway....when explaining your preference to people outside the BBW community the term BBW might be confusing for some. I would just say I'm attracted to bigger girls. Simple and to the point. You don't really have to label it as liking BBW. BBW, Big Girls, Curvy, Voluptuous...all good terms to use. I know may of us have had the word fat used in a derogatory way over the years, and there is this almost fear to use it in reference to being big by a lot of people. Quite frankly until I got into the size acceptance community I HATED the word fat, but I openly call myself fat these days- and in a good way. Our society spends so much time hyping the word up, I feel like we shouldn't make it a negative word- but that's just me. So referring to myself as a fat chick. fatty girl etc are terms I openly use, but wouldn't recommend that unless you are sure someone is okay with it honestly.

As far as telling someone you are attracted to them because of their size- depends on how you approach that. Not all big girls are accepting of themselves. Sadly the positivity that alot of the woman on this board show about their size isn't how everyone feels who is fat. I know before i got into the BBW scene I didn't even know there was a preference for bigger woman by a lot of men quite honestly. Regardless, just be honest about what you like. As long as you don't approach it in a creepy way that might put someone off I think its fine to make it known. Like I said its a preference. Some like red heads, some like big girls lol :)

Seems like your very open about your preference to others which is awesome and I commend you on that! :)
 

Keb

Princess
Joined
Jun 8, 2007
Messages
924
Location
,
I loaned my sweater to an 11yo girl a couple weeks ago. I noted it might be large, but it'd warm her up. She asked if I'd be offended if she said I was bigger than her. It made me grin; why should I be offended by something that's pretty darn obvious? (She also said she loves my bear hugs. Love that kid.)

Still, when it comes to romance, I'm going to assume if you've asked me out that my body is not unattractive to you. So tell me about everything else. Ask me about everything else! Isn't that what it's about? Getting to know another person?
 

Adrian

??
Joined
Nov 7, 2005
Messages
1,155
Location
,
About a month ago I was talking to a doctor about my wife, I referred to her as a "BBW". He asked, "what is a BBW?" To which I responded, "it stands for Big Beautiful Woman." He just nodded for he then understood I have a real preference for large women, for I said it with emphasis and pride!
 

LovelyLiz

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 15, 2009
Messages
3,241
Location
,
I feel like BBW can be kind of an "in" term for people on the inside of various fat communities. In that way, it makes me feel a little like a weirdo...like there's this special term for me that's ambiguous and in code because heaven forbid we talk about me being a fat woman, or about other fat women, in a straightforward way.

For the sake of clarity, and also so I don't feel like I'm some kind of "specialized" woman only certain "specialized" men can be attracted to, I like to be referred to in as obvious and normal terms as possible. Saying anything like "big girls", "larger women", "fuller figured women", whatever - those are just normal ways of saying that you dig the fat women and it gets the point across easily without having to speak in weird code words.
 

bigjayne66

Belly Queen
Joined
Sep 9, 2009
Messages
305
Location
,
Folks can label me as they think fit as long as it is not insulting...
I also prefer guys who love the softness and sensuality that a large lady has to offer but also is prepared to see through the fat too and look at the whole picture.:)
 

spiritangel

AmandaClause
Joined
Mar 1, 2010
Messages
9,407
Location
,
I loaned my sweater to an 11yo girl a couple weeks ago. I noted it might be large, but it'd warm her up. She asked if I'd be offended if she said I was bigger than her. It made me grin; why should I be offended by something that's pretty darn obvious? (She also said she loves my bear hugs. Love that kid.)

Still, when it comes to romance, I'm going to assume if you've asked me out that my body is not unattractive to you. So tell me about everything else. Ask me about everything else! Isn't that what it's about? Getting to know another person?


I did a fairy party for a friends daughter (was an awesome party) and was half expecting some of those things that we know kids cant help saying what stunned me was how many of the girls told me how beautiful I was, totally made all the work for the party well worth it
 

truebebeblue

Balls,I kicks em.
Joined
Jan 30, 2007
Messages
435
Location
,
In the past year I have been very open about my preference for BBW's. Friends, family, and skinny suitors are all aware of what has become an exclusive preference. Its what I am, its what I like and I am happy with it. As I am just now having the pleasure of dating BBW's, I have much to learn. My first question is what do prefer to be called? I know labeling someone isn't necessarily the most positive thing, however, I find it difficult to avoid this when size is what I am attracted to. A follow up question would be: is it alright to tell a girl I am attracted to her because of her size?

Thanks.


Surely her size is not ALL you are attracted to right?
Make sure if you are telling her the reasons you like her that you sandwich the size/shape of her in between less shallow qualities. If her fatness IS the only determining factor you should tell her. Appearance alone gives very little foothold for a relationship and she should be able to make the decision if she wants to date someone solely interested in her size.

I personally would make a quick exit and be irritated,I find the idea offensive.

I also HATE the term BBW.... I think its awkward and not always accurate.
I prefer fat but I have a pretty thick skin and confidence level.
 

LoveBHMS

default title
Joined
Apr 5, 2006
Messages
4,086
Location
,
Surely her size is not ALL you are attracted to right?
Make sure if you are telling her the reasons you like her that you sandwich the size/shape of her in between less shallow qualities. If her fatness IS the only determining factor you should tell her. Appearance alone gives very little foothold for a relationship and she should be able to make the decision if she wants to date someone solely interested in her size.

I personally would make a quick exit and be irritated,I find the idea offensive.

I also HATE the term BBW.... I think its awkward and not always accurate.
I prefer fat but I have a pretty thick skin and confidence level.

i honestly don't think it's fair to say it's a 'shallow quality' or that liking somebody's size or shape is shallow. It is part of who we are. As posted above, no FA likes every fat woman or man, but it is probably going to be the first or one of the first things somebody notices.

i don't think semantics are tremendously important. i personally say "chubby chaser" which everyone understands, or just "fat guys". Nobody knows what "BHM" means so i don't use it outside the community.
 

Tooz

sweet chocolate christ
Joined
Mar 30, 2006
Messages
5,085
Location
,
Call me a BBW and you'll get snark. I think it is an incredibly idiotic term. I am not "curvy," "big," or "large," I am fat, just like I am tall. Down with euphemisms.
 

Dr. Feelgood

intellectual nerd
***
Joined
Dec 20, 2006
Messages
4,703
Location
,
If there's a single main idea running through these posts, it's that different people react differently to different terms. Duh. :rolleyes: But remember that conversation is only partly about expressing your feelings; a lot more of it is about bonding with another person, and it helps to consider what you want to say from the point of view of the person you're talking to. If the lady is beautiful, every guy she's ever dated has told her so; you tell her she's smart, or funny, and she'll realize you appreciate her. If she's a rocket scientist, don't tell her she's bright; she knows that. Tell her she's pretty, or compassionate, or principled. In other words: don't go for the obvious; talk up some of her other good points.

P.S. You are allowed to enthuse over specific body parts AFTER you have met her parents (but not in front of them).:D
 

Webmaster

Chief Emeritus
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
Messages
1
Location
Tennessee, USA
As many know, the terms "BBW" and "Big Beautiful Woman" were coined by the late Carole Shaw (though there are claims of earlier use) who used, and trademarked, them for her BBW magazine that she started in 1979. I bought the magazine and trademarks in 1998 (see here) and published it for several more years. The terms gained wide acceptance and so, unlike Carole, I never enforced the trademarks, though it did bother me that the porn industry for a while appropriated them as just another genre/category. As is, I think it's a much better term than "FA" and so I am not surprised that many choose to use it.
 

orin

Well-Known Member
Joined
Oct 6, 2008
Messages
1,142
Location
,
I think the term BBW is overused .... when i see a bountiful woman i am attracted to i never use any terms referring to her size. When it comes to beauty I prefer bigger women, but I do not think there is a difference between a smaller woman and bigger womans beauty really ... beauty is beauty.

BUT BIG BEAUTIFUL WOMEN ... from my understand is meant to refer to a woman of size that is ACTUALLY ATTRACTIVE ... not just any woman of size. But beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

For me it is much more than just having size, it is shape, prettyness and how she carries herself that helps me to classify her as an actual BBW.
 

stan_der_man

The Teflon Frog
Joined
Sep 30, 2005
Messages
5,189
Location
,
As many know, the terms "BBW" and "Big Beautiful Woman" were coined by the late Carole Shaw (though there are claims of earlier use) who used, and trademarked, them for her BBW magazine that she started in 1979. I bought the magazine and trademarks in 1998 (see here) and published it for several more years. The terms gained wide acceptance and so, unlike Carole, I never enforced the trademarks, though it did bother me that the porn industry for a while appropriated them as just another genre/category. As is, I think it's a much better term than "FA" and so I am not surprised that many choose to use it.

You would be amazed Conrad, many of the younger people have no idea where the term "BBW" came from. Even if you attempted to enforce your trademark on the term "BBW", court precedent regarding words that become popular terminology such as "xeroxing" (from Xerox) and "tivo-ing" (from Tivo) have been ruled fair game to be used in certain circumstances without the need to seek permission from the trademark holder. Besides, since the days of Carole Shaw being publisher, BBW Magazine has faded into obscurity, very few of the younger people know that there used to be a printed version of "BBW Magazine", let alone that you still maintain a website of said name. Seriously.
 

patmcf

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2010
Messages
177
Location
,
Surely her size is not ALL you are attracted to right?
Make sure if you are telling her the reasons you like her that you sandwich the size/shape of her in between less shallow qualities. If her fatness IS the only determining factor you should tell her. Appearance alone gives very little foothold for a relationship and she should be able to make the decision if she wants to date someone solely interested in her size.

I personally would make a quick exit and be irritated,I find the idea offensive.

I also HATE the term BBW.... I think its awkward and not always accurate.
I prefer fat but I have a pretty thick skin and confidence level.

Yeaah. I really don't think liking someone because of their appearance is "shallow." I also wasn't really making the point that the only reason I want to be with a woman is because of her size. Ideally, I want a woman who I have a strong emotional connection with and who I also feel attracted to.
 

Webmaster

Chief Emeritus
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
Messages
1
Location
Tennessee, USA
Oh, I am fully aware of that and simply wanted to offer some historic background. Carole did enforce the trademark, but I never had any intention (nor the resources) to. I published BBW Magazine between 1999 and 2003, so the magazine hasn't existed in seven years, though the website is still up. I wish we had generated full PDFs of each issue as, fashions aside, they contained a lot of material that remains as relevant today as it was when the mags were created.


You would be amazed Conrad, many of the younger people have no idea where the term "BBW" came from. Even if you attempted to enforce your trademark on the term "BBW", court precedent regarding words that become popular terminology such as "xeroxing" (from Xerox) and "tivo-ing" (from Tivo) have been ruled fair game to be used in certain circumstances without the need to seek permission from the trademark holder. Besides, since the days of Carole Shaw being publisher, BBW Magazine has faded into obscurity, very few of the younger people know that there used to be a printed version of "BBW Magazine", let alone that you still maintain a website of said name. Seriously.
 

Latest posts

Top