Nude Modeling and its effect on my own self image

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bexy

is red again <3
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I am tired so can't explain this very well but I will try. Being naked doesn't embarrass or bother me, as I am the exact same size with my clothes off as I am with them on. Any body insecurities I have, I have whether dressed or nude.

Now that I am breastfeeding my daughter, I feel even less bothered about it. Having boobs my size, it is impossible to feed very discreetly and I always end up flashing someone somewhere lol, but couldn't really care less.

I do think that my having a paysite in the past helped to boost my confidence. We took the pics ourselves so it was always a fun, creative time for George and I, and I only ever submitted pictures I liked. I ignored any emails I got that said I would look better if x, y or z.
The only emails I ever got that bothered me where some I recieved when I posted pictures of myself pregnant on here. They were not sexy pics at all, one was in my underwear and the rest were all fully clothed. They were pictures taken to mark my progress and I shared them on here, but the emails I got made me feel as if I had been suggestive in some way, and managed to turn my lovely baby bump pictures into someone's wank fodder, which really upset me.
 

katherine22

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I've also posed for Substantia and I have fun every time. I think it helps that she is als a bbw so she "gets it" so to speak. She understands bbw body topology and knows how to make it beautiful.

I'm taking a life drawing class and I've thought of posing for the class, but then I wouldn't be able to draw. I'd love it if we had a bbw nude to draw...I find myself a little uncomfortable staring at people who aren't my size and their topology a bit foreign, which surprised me. You'd think being surrounded by images of thin nude women would make seeing someone like that seem like no big deal but it was, and I'm not sure why. I found myself drawing lots of hard right angles, which again surprised me. I didn't realize how uncomfortable I was at seeing thin people nude. That same feeling would be extended to me were I to pose nude I'm sure and so knowing I had that thought was quite troubling and I'm not sure how I got there. I am hoping that the more models we draw the more I will get used to it.They of Art.

In general tho, I have no problem with public nudity - to an extewouldn't walk down the street nude, but I could be and have been nude on a balcony or on a rooftop or in a room full of people. I just put whatever criticism they might have aside for the moment and just enjoy the freedom of it. I admit too I do enjoy the subversive nature of it as well...
I was an artist model when I was young. The artists told me that I had a "Renoiresque" body due to my coloring. It was nice to be admired by the artists. I would love to model now - to confront the notion of what an older women's body can look like.
 

katherine22

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you should do something! i loved the body casts that i saw of yours. and you could also do photos that obscure your face. i think that would be an amazing way to show the nude ones and you could keep the others until you retire etc... this will be a lot of fun to do too when we are older women and have more freedom. can you imagine all of the pent up art from women thats going to come out once they are freed up from those kinds of restraints?. i think its going to be a really exciting world of the art of women.
To know that I will always do art sustains me.
 

Deemondess

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I was coaxed into posting some lingerie pics on a well known free site and I was amazed at all the compliments a webmaster approached me and I ended up joining his pay site

Last june 2008 I had my firs ever professional shoot and I havnt looked back since
I have a great blog and website

I work as a phone sex operator and also on cam

and I have clients and photographers book me for paid photo shoots

best ego boost I evber had was posting on that site
I am overweight short fine haired big belly with HH cup natural Boobs

oh and I am 51 years old

so dont give up yet

Dee
 

Fascinita

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I'd love it if we had a bbw nude to draw...
When I was taking life drawing at university, we had a BBW who posed for us regularly. She had had a breastlift and the scars were still relatively fresh. I remember how proud she seemed of herself, to be showing off her body. Mostly, the models were transparent and inscrutable, and I think some of them had a lot of experience doing it. But this particular woman seemed to me to be on a personal quest in doing her modeling. There was something in her attitude, a little defiant something. Of course, I could just be projecting. :p

And I want to add that all the models were fabulous, and that it really does feel like a privilege, being in the presence of a nude body--fat or thin--and trying to capture its likeness. They're all full of beauty. All that wonder. Really. :)
 

superodalisque

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When I was taking life drawing at university, we had a BBW who posed for us regularly. She had had a breastlift and the scars were still relatively fresh. I remember how proud she seemed of herself, to be showing off her body. Mostly, the models were transparent and inscrutable, and I think some of them had a lot of experience doing it. But this particular woman seemed to me to be on a personal quest in doing her modeling. There was something in her attitude, a little defiant something. Of course, I could just be projecting. :p

And I want to add that all the models were fabulous, and that it really does feel like a privilege, being in the presence of a nude body--fat or thin--and trying to capture its likeness. They're all full of beauty. All that wonder. Really. :)
exactly. wouldn't it be great to be able to bring more of that feeling to the online community. from an SA standpoint it could be very helpful.
 

SparkGirl

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I've never posed nude, but have dealt with negative body self imagine, especially in regards to the breast area. I was so used to what society and Hugh Hefner have thrown out there as the "norm", that I felt like mine were unacceptable. One day I saw an article in one of my magazines that showed the pictures of 50 women who were brave enough to show pictures of what their real breasts looked like. I was so thankful to those women and their bravery, because I finally began to appreciate myself after that.
 

BBW4Chattery

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I've never posed nude, but have dealt with negative body self imagine, especially in regards to the breast area. I was so used to what society and Hugh Hefner have thrown out there as the "norm", that I felt like mine were unacceptable. One day I saw an article in one of my magazines that showed the pictures of 50 women who were brave enough to show pictures of what their real breasts looked like. I was so thankful to those women and their bravery, because I finally began to appreciate myself after that.
I might just google that later. I need that same sort of boost. My biggest body shame is/are my breasts. I have severe asymmetry; one a small C and one a FF. It's humiliating in every possible way for me. The worst is to know that I've never had cute breasts and never will unless I fork out $10k for a reconstruction.

I've learned to buy bras to squish the big one and pull up the little one and to wear sweaters to cover the sideboob leftover from big titty. There's still getting naked; it's so hard. One long term ex loved them and said it was the "best of both worlds." Every other guy, however, has their favorite and completely ignores the other one. Ha. I just made myself laugh... so, it's not like I'm tortured over it every minute of every day.

I just wish they were at least the same size. So I could wear swimsuits and normal clothes without constantly worrying who is going to notice the massive difference.

So, anyway, that's a rambling rant just to say I understand the breast shame. I can deal with a million rolls, but I have never come to accept the big titty/little titty situation.
 
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succubus_dxb

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I have actually been thinking about this a fair bit recently. I have been offered the opportunity to do some nude modelling for a group of art students (which I am myself) - and I just can't take the leap!

I have no issue posting pictures of myself that I have taken- I have the final say, 'director's cut' so to speak, but a room full of people observing me from every angle, scrutinizing...... seems terrifying and equally liberating!

Not sure if i'll work up the courage to actually do it, but I am thinking about including some 'graphic' self portraiture in my upcoming work


well done to all of you ladies who have bared all!
 

DirtyLittleDiva

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In some responses, not all, I've noticed a very negative view of nude website modeling. I have been a magazine and website model for a little over four years and I've loved every minute of it. I would say that 95% of all interaction online is positive. The negative comments are rare and when they do come, I look at the SOURCE and just feel sorry for them. Most of the rude comments come from 15 or 16 year olds or uneducated, dregs of society, so they don't bother ME at ALL. I understand that every person's experience is different because people handle things in different ways but a negative shadow should not be cast on ALL website girls because of other women's experiences; because not all of us have bad experiences.

I also believe there is a negative opinion on what the women who model nude are like as a person. I'll use myself as an example because I can only speak for myself on the matter. I have a bachelor’s degree from a private university, I have a loving family, I wasn't molested or raped, I am close with both of my parents, I have a committed monogamous relationship and we've been together for over 4 years now and besides letting "my freak" out sexually online... I am a very reserved and old fashioned person in every other aspect of my life. My boyfriend and I are NOT swingers, we don't have sex with people in the industry, and we do not take advantage of people or force them into anything they don’t want to do. I was also not forced to get into this business, with my degree I had MANY options but I wanted to get in this business because I enjoy it.

Besides modeling nude, I also build other BBW adult websites for ladies. None of these women are forced into anything. As a matter of fact, they approach us to build their websites and we tell them, "You can shoot whatever kind of content you are comfortable with shooting." And guess what, they do!

So, all that jibber jabber to say:

If YOU were forced into doing something you didn't like, terribly sorry... not all experiences are like that.

If YOU were criticized and put down, terribly sorry... not all people experience that on a large scale and a few people’s negative or even positive comments shouldn’t make or break you as a person.

I had self confidence/self esteem before modeling. I didn't get into modeling to gain confidence, if you get into it for that reason only, it's wrong.

I do not post often in these areas because I’ve noticed my input and the input of other nude webgirls are almost completely ignored, but VIEWED. I had to say something in this thread because my experiences are different than others.

Always remember, self confidence and esteem comes from within, not what other people tell you!
 

Ivy

more cake, please!
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I was going to reply, but DirtyLittleDiva said everything that I was feeling. :)
 

Brenda

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""And I would like to say that the copious outside praise for these pics wasn't hugely important for me because I was strong enough on my own, but in truth it was absolutely fundamental to my process of self-acceptance and love. I hate admitting that, but it's true!""

I get why you feel this way but what if the praise does not come? What if people think you are unattractive naked? Can one have self acceptance and love in the face of being found physically undesirable?
 

Fascinita

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I'm pleased, pleased, pleased to see DLD's post--though I have some points to debate with you, Diva (for example, I'm thrilled to read what your experiences have been like, from "the other side of the coin," but there is one "should" in your post that makes me a little uncomfortable because it appears to tell other women how they "should" be).

What I find exciting is that there should be a space on Dimensions where ALL women--including the women who do paysite work and who may not have participated in discussions in the past--to share their experiences. Why should we classify ourselves as women belonging to different categories? We're all on the same website, and yet we tend to segregate ourselves and maybe work from assumptions about one another, rather than letting our experiences speak for themselves. So it's a pleasure to see the conversation in this thread going as it has.

Ladies, you rock my world. Excuse my gushing. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
 

Shosh

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In some responses, not all, I've noticed a very negative view of nude website modeling. I have been a magazine and website model for a little over four years and I've loved every minute of it. I would say that 95% of all interaction online is positive. The negative comments are rare and when they do come, I look at the SOURCE and just feel sorry for them. Most of the rude comments come from 15 or 16 year olds or uneducated, dregs of society, so they don't bother ME at ALL. I understand that every person's experience is different because people handle things in different ways but a negative shadow should not be cast on ALL website girls because of other women's experiences; because not all of us have bad experiences.

I also believe there is a negative opinion on what the women who model nude are like as a person. I'll use myself as an example because I can only speak for myself on the matter. I have a bachelor’s degree from a private university, I have a loving family, I wasn't molested or raped, I am close with both of my parents, I have a committed monogamous relationship and we've been together for over 4 years now and besides letting "my freak" out sexually online... I am a very reserved and old fashioned person in every other aspect of my life. My boyfriend and I are NOT swingers, we don't have sex with people in the industry, and we do not take advantage of people or force them into anything they don’t want to do. I was also not forced to get into this business, with my degree I had MANY options but I wanted to get in this business because I enjoy it.

Besides modeling nude, I also build other BBW adult websites for ladies. None of these women are forced into anything. As a matter of fact, they approach us to build their websites and we tell them, "You can shoot whatever kind of content you are comfortable with shooting." And guess what, they do!

So, all that jibber jabber to say:

If YOU were forced into doing something you didn't like, terribly sorry... not all experiences are like that.

If YOU were criticized and put down, terribly sorry... not all people experience that on a large scale and a few people’s negative or even positive comments shouldn’t make or break you as a person.

I had self confidence/self esteem before modeling. I didn't get into modeling to gain confidence, if you get into it for that reason only, it's wrong.

I do not post often in these areas because I’ve noticed my input and the input of other nude webgirls are almost completely ignored, but VIEWED. I had to say something in this thread because my experiences are different than others.

Always remember, self confidence and esteem comes from within, not what other people tell you!
There are other webgirls who post on the main boards and are very much a part of the community, their views and opinions valued.
Buffie, Hotti Megan, Ivy, Sasha to name but a few.
You get out of it what you put in.
 

Fascinita

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There are other webgirls who post on the main boards and are very much a part of the community, their views and opinions valued.
S., it looks to me like DLD was addressing what she believes are widely held misconceptions about nude modeling, not specifically on Dims, though perhaps represented here, too. Let's hear each other out and see what happens. The BBW Forum provides a perfect umbrella for all of us to share respectfully, since it's protected.

How's the weather in Hackensack, BTW? :p

Up with fat women! Whether we're naked or clothed. *curtsies*
 

Shosh

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S., it looks to me like DLD was addressing what she believes are widely held misconceptions about nude modeling, not specifically on Dims, though perhaps represented here, too. Let's hear each other out and see what happens. The BBW Forum provides a perfect umbrella for all of us to share respectfully, since it's protected.

How's the weather in Hackensack, BTW? :p

Up with fat women! Whether we're naked or clothed. *curtsies*
I don't believe I was sharing disrespectfully. DLD was saying that models get ignored and I was begging to differ.
There are models here who take the time and contribute, and hence are very much a part of the community.
 

Fascinita

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I don't believe I was sharing disrespectfully. DLD was saying that models get ignored and I was begging to differ.
There are models here who take the time and contribute, and hence are very much a part of the community.
Ah, I see where DLD did mention that, Susannah.

And I agree that you get out of it what you put into it, roughly speaking. I think that, in going ahead and posting, DLD shows that she kind of agrees with that sentiment, too--though it's not my place to speak for her, and I can only guess that it's so because of the presence of her post here.

Either way, it's great to see input from all corners of our little world here, as far as I'm concerned. It does my heart good to see a thread like this, where women have been willing to be honest and open with one another about their feelings and experiences.

I do apologize that I misunderstood the spirit of your post, Susannah.

Enough of this interruption from me. I'll let you all go back to the topic at hand. :)
 

DirtyLittleDiva

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Hi ladies,

Sometimes with writing things on a forum, it's hard to communicate how I really feel because my expressions and tone of voice is impossible to portray through text, lol. But I wasn't saying that we are ignored by dims people who aren't in the adult industry specifically, it's something I find in every aspect of life. And I am not saying it's done by everyone, I feel the love from a lot of women who aren't in the adult world however there is the group of women who without knowing me are flat out rude or ignore my attempts at communication out rightly. When I give examples, I don't mean for it to sound like I'm grouping everyone together, the examples I give pertain to certain experiences that I've had personally. I also have female friends in the industry who've experienced the same things and we've discussed it at length. So, I usually just tend to post in the adult sections of forums and other places.

Like Fascinta alluded to, if I didn't feel comfortable posting here I wouldn't. And I do realize you get what you give. I am also not one that posts a lot unless I see something that really moves me. So even if I don't post 100's of replies to different threads, what I do contribute, I feel strongly about.

The main reason I posted in the first place was to let you guys know that not every experience posing nude is a negative one. I just wanted to share a little about myself and my experiences in this crazy nude world of mine :)
 

Cors

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Thank you for sharing, DirtyLittleDiva. I agree that many people are indeed prejudiced against women in the adult industry. Most of the people I know in sex work (strippers, escorts even the upscale ones) unfortunately do fit the stereotypes, but this seems to be rarer with pro-Dommes and webmodels - not sure if my experience is unique.

The BBW adult industry is a competitive one. I am not that familiar with paysites, so feel free to tell me that I am mistaken but I noticed that there are things that are likely to make a webmodel more successful. It could be possessing certain physical attributes (eg. extreme pear-shape), catering to popular fetishes (weight gain, facesitting) and shooting some types of content (girl/girl, hardcore). So, while a girl can shoot whatever kind of content she is comfortable with shooting, especially if she doesn't do it for the money (and her webmaster doesn't pressure her to try harder to make up for the time and effort invested in setting up her site), won't the lack of fans/members/support on forums eventually get to her?

Say, Model A and Model B both post their set previews on a BBW forum. Model A usually gets 200 hits and 5 pages of compliments from men and women alike. Model B, however, gets 100 hits, no comments at all and perhaps even criticism (eg. your thighs aren't big enough, your cellulite is off-putting, you have terrible acne and your nose is uneven). Model A also earns ten times more than Model B. This is understandable if Model A is doing all the things that are likely to make a webgirl popular and Model B isn't, though I imagine that many girls in Model B's situation will feel compelled to start doing more. However, what if Model B is following the exact same formula but simply doesn't have the physical attributes popular with fans?

How does a girl overcome this, or should women who are fat but don't act or look the way that potential fans/members like just not model?
 
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