Preference VS fetish.

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Fascinita

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Long Live the Library
I'll join you in that cheer, Tony. I support freedom of expression, as long as it's ethical and enjoyed responsibly. It's not for me singly to decide what's ethical, but I think the site itself has already proved that ethics are important concerns, in the move to prohibit the mention of "underage" characters in stories.

As for what's been discussed in this thread, I'd like to see a label put on the library saying that Dimensions is against hatred of fat and that if people must express fat-hatred, they should do it in clearly marked areas of the library only.

So that's all. I think people somehow got it in their heads that folks want the library gone. Not so.
 

wrestlingguy

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Ya don't.....
Not a good alternative, Russ.......sorry.

I come off a weekend of bringing a community of very different people closer together, and then have to read all this personal shytte, where the holes are poked at the messenger, rather than the message, both sides.

WTF happened to the question posed by the OP? He's likely moved on to "greener pastures" like the Fat Forums, or Curvage, or Fantasy Feeder by now, and our group has morphed the question into a discussion of anything else but the original topic. Geez, go figure.

One thing for certain, I'm an asshole if I continue to read this thread. Oh, and for those of you who think I'm an asshole anyway, at least you know that I consider it myself at times.

Eff this, I'm gonna go plan the spring bash.
 

Green Eyed Fairy

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Still, actions speak louder than words and it doesn't change the fact the site is designed to encourage visitations from perverts what with its massive porn library and swathes of plugs for adults BBW sites. The site's content would argue that the porn aspect is integral to its mission and if Conrad has a problem with it being seen that way he may want to take a more hands-on approach to policing what gets posted here.


But I don't see why you expect that the perverts will leave of their own accord when everything that they want is right here. I mean, if you leave trash in your kitchen, who should you blame when you get cockroaches?


Personally, I think that abolishing the library would be a safer approach, simply because any sort of pornography archive is eventually going to attract these elements. I suppose that if it were very heavily policed it could be restricted to writing that is genuinely uplifting rather than sordid. But such stories would be written for the purposes of politics first and pornography second. That's not a criticism, mind you; I'm just trying to say that it would be a different animal than the archive we have now, which is explicitly for pornography with no higher political or educational aims.
My main point is that I think the main reason that people are constantly rehashing the "fetish vs preference" debate is because they want to think of this particular kink as something that elevates them above people with other kinks.

I do know some larger people in real life, but my girlfriend is rather svelte. I don't know what conclusions you want to draw from that, but there it is.
It's not the best comparison, I admit. I was just trying to point out how it didn't make any sense to have a site full of the sort of thing that would attract fat admirers and then get upset that fat admirers showed up. I could have just as easily said that it was silly to have a garden full of flowers and then get angry that bees showed up. I didn't mean it as a slight against either fat women or fat admirers, it was just the first analogy that came to mind.
I most certainly NEVER said that BBWs should just accept all the shit they get here. I hope that you're just confusing me with another poster.
Perhaps you said it a bit more eloquently.....but it all means the same thing at the end of the day.

I should say that, regardless of what side of this debate Santaclear is on, his jokes seem calculated to dismiss ideas that he just doesn't want to see debated.

It's normal for fat people or people with common sense, to dismiss the "reasoning" of fat haters. Santa isn't a Fat ADMIRER that disses the fat women here.....let's leave it at that.
 

mollycoddles

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Perhaps you said it a bit more eloquently.....but it all means the same thing at the end of the day.
I'm afraid that you are completely misconstruing everything that I've said. I trust that you're not doing it on purpose, of course.

People in this thread seemed to be confused as to WHY there was so much oestensibly anti-fat porn on a pro-fat website. I was explaining WHY the site is the way it is. I merely said that, given the way the site is run, it was unfair to treat people who post such porn as if they should have thought this was an inappropriate place to post such porn. I never said that the BBWs here had to just accept it or that they shouldn't push for changes.

It's normal for fat people or people with common sense, to dismiss the "reasoning" of fat haters. Santa isn't a Fat ADMIRER that disses the fat women here.....let's leave it at that.
Well, sorry, just seems that LovesBHM raised a good point. Even if you don't like that poster, you know, broken clock, twice a day.
 

tonynyc

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Not a good alternative, Russ.......sorry.

I come off a weekend of bringing a community of very different people closer together, and then have to read all this personal shytte, where the holes are poked at the messenger, rather than the message, both sides.

WTF happened to the question posed by the OP? He's likely moved on to "greener pastures" like the Fat Forums, or Curvage, or Fantasy Feeder by now, and our group has morphed the question into a discussion of anything else but the original topic. Geez, go figure.

One thing for certain, I'm an asshole if I continue to read this thread. Oh, and for those of you who think I'm an asshole anyway, at least you know that I consider it myself at times.

Eff this, I'm gonna go plan the spring bash
.
Phil:
Time to have good thoughts... You, Berna & the other great awesome NJ Dimmers just plan that Spring 2010 Bash & hopefully Pre-Dinner Bash. That's what it's all about. Meeting folks and having a wonderful time ... Wonder if the loveable Assholes are invited....:)
 

Green Eyed Fairy

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I'm afraid that you are completely misconstruing everything that I've said. I trust that you're not doing it on purpose, of course.

People in this thread seemed to be confused as to WHY there was so much oestensibly anti-fat porn on a pro-fat website. I was explaining WHY the site is the way it is. I merely said that, given the way the site is run, it was unfair to treat people who post such porn as if they should have thought this was an inappropriate place to post such porn. I never said that the BBWs here had to just accept it or that they shouldn't push for changes.
Nah, I don't think I misunderstood you at all. I'm one of the people that "post porn here". I'm also acutely aware of all the other people that post here. I write porn FOR fat people.....not about hating them. That seems more appropriate for a site that is "for fat people and their ADMIRERS".
If anyone found it convenient to jump to the conclusion that fat hatred is just as groovy as the fat people they supposedly "admire", then I think they need to pull their heads out of their collective asses.
But that's just me not being so eloquent but more to the point again. *shrugs*

Well, sorry, just seems that LovesBHM raised a good point. Even if you don't like that poster, you know, broken clock, twice a day.
Russ raises a good point himself....and yeah, I do like him. :)
But then again, he doesn't see his preference or the woman he loves as a fetish....so I can see why someone that comes here only for the kink might not agree with him.
 

Santaclear

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Well Santa: Long Live the Library
Sure, long live it.

Truthfully, I've hardly mentioned it (and this is to everyone, not just you, Tony) but I could hardly give a flying fuck about fetish or no-fetish and I have NO interest in the Library. Sure, I respect that it's here and that some of my friends probably like it but it's never been for me. It's not that I'm a prude - I can probably say more twisted stuff in a second of conversation than most of those wildest stories and not blink an eye.

I'm only saying this to explain that I'm not "offended" by any of it.

To me, what's being discussed on this thread, sure....FA this and FA that, fetish, yada...Conrad's place, don't like it, can leave but the focus here (Dimensions) should be on fat people. Their voices should be heard.

LovesBHM bemoaned a "hierarchy" here, that "the fetishists are treated as second class citizens" - but to me (and apparently to many women who regard themselves as more than fetish objects) it seems the opposite is true. Sure, it's great for FAs get their rocks off but that's less important than making things better for fat people. I think a sense of community here fosters that. Nothing against the fetish contingent but getting off only benefits themselves.
 

exile in thighville

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the stories should be password protected and you should have to apply to view them like any other private forum. that would keep the easily shook babies and hypothetical newborns from accidentally wandering in and having their brain fucked by sexy fiction.

LOCK THREAD.
 

LoveBHMS

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To me, what's being discussed on this thread, sure....FA this and FA that, fetish, yada, it's Conrad's place, don't like it, can leave but the focus here (Dimensions) should be on fat people. Their voices should be heard.
What about the three fat people who said they like humiliation stories? Should their voices be heard or only fat people voices that tow the line. Not all fat people believe that these kinds of stories are anti-fat.

I'm gonna go post now in Dan's thread about the last thing I did for size acceptance.
 

Sugar

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I really like Dan's idea. If you want to read stories, awesome. Contact a mod and password and tada!

I realize it's more work, but then a short disclaimer can be offered.

Hell just froze over. :)
 

Santaclear

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What about the three fat people who said they like humiliation stories? Should their voices be heard or only fat people voices that tow the line. Not all fat people believe that these kinds of stories are anti-fat.
Yes, their voices should be heard. There is no "line."
 

mollycoddles

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Nah, I don't think I misunderstood you at all. I'm one of the people that "post porn here". I'm also acutely aware of all the other people that post here. I write porn FOR fat people.....not about hating them. That seems more appropriate for a site that is "for fat people and their ADMIRERS".
If anyone found it convenient to jump to the conclusion that fat hatred is just as groovy as the fat people they supposedly "admire", then I think they need to pull their heads out of their collective asses.
But that's just me not being so eloquent but more to the point again. *shrugs*
Uh, you just misunderstood me again. There is porn on this site that you object to. People here said that it is inappropriate for this site and that it should not be here. They seemed mystified as to why, if this was the case, that this sort of porn was, in fact, here. I simply explained exactly why it was here. I didn't say that this was the way it SHOULD be or MUST be; I was just explaining why it is the way that it is and why a person coming to the site for the first time might think that this was an appropriate venue for such porn. I was simply saying that someone coming to that conclusion would be making an honest mistake.

If you want to get on some high horse because you think the sort of porn you write is nobler than the porn I write, I don't have much see how that pertains to this matter.




Russ raises a good point himself....and yeah, I do like him. :)
But then again, he doesn't see his preference or the woman he loves as a fetish....so I can see why someone that comes here only for the kink might not agree with him.
Ohhhhhhh no you di'int! LOL

I think I've already explained at length how my fetish doesn't prohibit me from loving, so I won't bother going into that again.

PS Who's Russ?
 

Fascinita

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password protected
Glad you agree, thighs. Other posters have already suggested the password option, in language that isn't inflammatory or derogatory of those they are debating.

Oh, yeah. And that's something else you've done for size acceptance. :happy:


Well maybe there could be a password protected section for erotic material so people don't accidentally stumble on to something they don't want to see. The stories and paysite stuff can go there. I don't know if it's pragmatic from an administrative standpoint, though.
Can we talk about putting in some measures that might be helpful in both sides co-existing?

I dunno if the administration would be interested in implementing this, but how about putting the fiction that contains elements of abuse or hate toward fat people in a password-protected forum? Anyone who requested a password could access that fiction, then, without the rest of Dims users having to run into that fiction when they surf the library. It would be a way of having those who desire it "opt in" to those kinds of stories, without everyone else having to opt in by default.

A measure like that would be helpful, I think, in making it clear that we recognize and respect the line between fantasy and reality. Actively acknowledging the fantastic nature of those stories and establishing firm symbolic boundaries that must be respected would, I think, go a long way toward reassuring real fat people and their supporters that their interests are being protected, too. ...

Just an idea.
 

kayrae

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I really liked it. I'm not even kidding. But I guess this one :happy: will have to do.
 

mollycoddles

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Russ raises a good point himself....and yeah, I do like him. :)
But then again, he doesn't see his preference or the woman he loves as a fetish....so I can see why someone that comes here only for the kink might not agree with him.
Assuming that Russ is Santaclear, my only disagreement with him was that he kept insulting FAs, accusing them of sordid behavior with children, and then defending his childish behavior by claiming he was just joking. I don't see how that at all relates to the way that either he or I define our feelings for larger ladies.
 

thatgirl08

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I've been avoiding this thread at all costs because I honestly can't stand some of these discussions but I have to say this. I don't understand why this is so long and dragged out. There are two options here, option 1 - change the library (eliminate it, put a password on it, whatever) or 2 - don't change the library. There are clearly two camps of thought here and it's been proven yet again on this thread that those two sides cannot come to an agreement and that no one is changing anyone elses mind. So my question for all of you is, what's next? Are we going to continue debating this? It's a waste of time and no one's having any fun and it's just creating a lot of negativity. If you sincerly have an issue with the library, why not PM a mod or Conrad and discuss the issue with him or make some sort of proposal for a change? I just don't see the need for this type of ongoing debate. Feel free to enlighten me.
 

Santaclear

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Assuming that Russ is Santaclear, my only disagreement with him was that he kept insulting FAs, accusing them of sordid behavior with children, and then defending his childish behavior by claiming he was just joking. I don't see how that at all relates to the way that either he or I define our feelings for larger ladies.
I didn't insult FAs. And the exchange was in posts #516 through 519, if anyone's interested.
 
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