Preference VS fetish.

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Fascinita

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Do I need to say this again? Russ didn't say "Your argument/post is funny." He said "I don't like your argument, so I'm going to say that you sound like you like diddling kids."
Wait a minute. You're putting a lot of words in his mouth that he never said.

Molly, we seemed to be having a rational, fair conversation--one in which you had thanked me for asking people not to conflate the issue of "pedophilia" with the issue at hand--and then LoveBHMs walked in and started talking about "underage" kids. Santaclear took her to task for using THAT VERY TOPIC to cloud the issue.

He explained that his joke was intended to get her to see the contradictions of her position. He even asked her what she'd like to see done about her discomfort about people's family pics. It was a clear case of his taking her to task for clouding the issue with talk of "underage kids." She was talking about that.

But you continue to stuff words he didn't say in his mouth? That doesn't seem fair, molly.

Or are you saying that you know better how to interpret what he said than he does?

Please. Drop this "underage" thing. Nobody's making it about that but you at this point. Let's get back to talking with clarity.
 

Fascinita

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I'm a little disheartened that this thread has painted it to look like the people who stick mostly to the discussion boards are akin to the Harper Valley PTA or the blind bourgeoisie while the readers of the library are either a bunch of moral bottom-dwellers or sexually-liberated anarchists.
I've tried for some time now to take people to task for fighting their battles along these lines, especially when it's clear that their intelligence and purported maturity should make those kinds of shenanigans clearly off-limits in debate.

The irony is lost on some folks of painting their critics as "prudes" and the "PTA" brigade AND then accusing the "prudes" and "babies" of treating them as "bottom-dwellers."

What does it lead to? Debates that are mired in whining and name-calling, and at some point even those calling for a cease on name-calling are name-called.

There's clearly something very immediately appealing about ridiculing one's opponent, painting her a monster and oneself a victim. I'm guilty of it myself occasionally. And I see some people who make it their specialty to mount entire campaigns against ideas they don't like by using good old ridicule. I've seen it aimed at women a lot--mudslinging against "prudes" and "feminists" and "the PC Police" (that way you can take a shot at anti-homophobia, too) and "the feminist bullies" and the "grandmas."

The tactic makes it appear as though one has won the debate, when in fact all that happens is that mud has been flung. And I'm not sure mud is a better weapon on a public Internet forum than old-fashioned debate.

Is it conducive to progress or to any kind of neighborly climate? Absolutely not. The mods sound overworked as it is, so I don't blame them if they can't get to all of it. Someone should do something. But I think that would require going deep to the roots, and a lot of self-reflection, and that is sometimes too difficult to do.

*shrug*
 

Santaclear

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You guys need to make up your mind whether the smilie was a wry multifaceted nod or a condescending racist slap in the face.
I used that smiley maybe 4,000 times, so it should be clear I liked it. Dan said it's racist. A couple others mentioned that too. We're different guys. Can't please everyone.
 

Santaclear

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Again, I'm not emotional about the Library or fetish vs. no fetish.

I do feel these are interesting topics and 100% pertinent to Dimensions, so there's no reason they shouldn't be discussed out in the open.
 

Archangel

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.

Secondly, when people almost NEVER post, and then only post to stir shit in a contentious thread, then yeah, I'll question their motives. That's not a lynch mob -- and I think the person who makes such shit stirring comments should be able to defend themselves without playing the victim card. It doesn't make anyone better if they are a regular contributor here; however it does bring into sharp focus a person's intentions vis a vis Dimensions' future when they almost never post except to rag on the people who DO try to make Dimensions the very best it can be.
My original post was what I thought a pretty well thought out summary of my feelings, without being attacking and without stirring up anything that wasn't already whipping around the community like a hurricane. I think if you actually read what I wrote, I think it's fairly clear I wasn't attacking anyone. I did use some self deprecating humor, so if that's what's being pointed at, I can understand that. Probably a bad place to use such humor- so I apologize for that. I also pointed out the reason I thought it was worth posting.

I'm not sure what a post count plays into that. I wasn't 'ragging' on anyone, in fact I agreed with some of the items being said on the other side of the argument. I'd be more than happy to explain/defend anything I said, but it doesn't seem like that's the issue for people. I don't feel like a second-class citizen just because I don't always have something to say.
 

elroycohen

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I might be an asshole to you for some of what I said above but at least I'm an honest asshole that isn't playing the victim here.

Oh sorry....didn't mean to write another long paragraph to upset you so badly again :doh:

Go find someone else to vent at Elroy. You and I are done.
I clipped it to save space. I think I got the important parts. People can choose if they want to to go back and wade through your tap dance of a response in its full form.

As long as you are satisfied that we are done, because if one thing has been made clear to me from you painfully long and rambling post it is that it is all about you and what you want and how you feel. At least we can end our back and forth agreeing on one thing (the part that I bolded).

Don't be sorry about the length. For the most part they have been entertaining, if devoid of any usefull imformation regarding the point I brought up. I too feel no further need to continue since I can't get you to engage what I'm saying instead of what you said to someone else in another thread.

Have a nice day:)
 

tonynyc

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Again, I'm not emotional about the Library or fetish vs. no fetish.

I do feel these are interesting topics and 100% pertinent to Dimensions, so there's no reason they shouldn't be discussed out in the open.




The Library is still standing -No Farenheit 451 here
;)
 

mollycoddles

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Wait a minute. You're putting a lot of words in his mouth that he never said.

Molly, we seemed to be having a rational, fair conversation--one in which you had thanked me for asking people not to conflate the issue of "pedophilia" with the issue at hand--and then LoveBHMs walked in and started talking about "underage" kids. Santaclear took her to task for using THAT VERY TOPIC to cloud the issue.

He explained that his joke was intended to get her to see the contradictions of her position. He even asked her what she'd like to see done about her discomfort about people's family pics. It was a clear case of his taking her to task for clouding the issue with talk of "underage kids." She was talking about that.

But you continue to stuff words he didn't say in his mouth? That doesn't seem fair, molly.

Or are you saying that you know better how to interpret what he said than he does?

Please. Drop this "underage" thing. Nobody's making it about that but you at this point. Let's get back to talking with clarity.
That's true, I was paraphrasing to point out that the tone of Santaclear's comments seemed quite different from the way GEF interpreted them; I think most people would tell from context that I wasn't direct quoting, but in any case I'll admit that it wasn't entirely fair. I suppose I'm more annoyed by Santa's attempt to brush off criticism against him by claiming it's all a joke and that it's the people he offends that have the problem.
 

mollycoddles

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I find this statement to be quite ironic coming from someone that seems to be on a mission to defend loves and an even bigger mission to bash Santaclear.....:blink:

We're done Molly.
I'm not on any sort of mission. I could just as easily say that you're on some sort of mission to defend Santaclear and bash Loves. I don't know anything about anyone who's posted here other than what I've seen them do in this thread, so I'm basing all my comments on what I see here. But if you want to make up motives and attribute them to me, go right ahead. You seem to be really good at that.
 

thatgirl08

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Read the rest of the thread for reasons why people feel that's not enough. The disclaimer that has been proposed is along the lines of...

"Dimensions does not condone hatred or abuse against fat people. If you must use language that expresses hate or portrays abuse against fat or fat people, please do it only in the areas clearly marked for those purposes.

Others have articulated it better, but that captures the gist of it.
Yeah, I mean I honestly have no problem with a disclaimer being put up. It seems like an okay compromise to me.
 

exile in thighville

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Glad you agree, thighs. Other posters have already suggested the password option, in language that isn't inflammatory or derogatory of those they are debating.

Oh, yeah. And that's something else you've done for size acceptance. :happy:

hush. by lacking the cognitive ability to use the IGNORE FUNCTION in your brains unpaid mods are given way too much (thankless) busy work round the clock just to keep people from being offended by things they Do Not Have to See. did you write letters to the paint company telling them to put a label on the paint cans warning you not to eat it too?

dimensions as a whole lacks the maturity and sophistication to handle an archive of fetish stories and they should really be removed from the site and moved elsewhere. somewhere they don't have to be defended every fucking week. goddammit shut this thread up.
 

TraciJo67

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hush. by lacking the cognitive ability to use the IGNORE FUNCTION in your brains unpaid mods are given way too much (thankless) busy work round the clock just to keep people from being offended by things they Do Not Have to See. did you write letters to the paint company telling them to put a label on the paint cans warning you not to eat it too?

dimensions as a whole lacks the maturity and sophistication to handle an archive of fetish stories and they should really be removed from the site and moved elsewhere. somewhere they don't have to be defended every fucking week. goddammit shut this thread up.

I'm going to picture you in full pancake make-up and holding a rose between your teeth while saying this.
 

Mack27

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Just let people be who they are. The humiliation side of things was never my bag, but it used to come up a lot in private chats, when I was doing that a lot. I get the feeling that out of the people who want to be fattened (feederism is tolerated here right? At least in fantasy terms?) there is at least a double digit percentage where humiliation is a facet of what turns them on. To be derided by loved ones, people in general but especially lovers for being fat is a turn on for some people.

You aren't any better than them just because what they find erotic you find offensive.
 

bdog

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Read the rest of the thread for reasons why people feel that's not enough. The disclaimer that has been proposed is along the lines of...

"Dimensions does not condone hatred or abuse against fat people. If you must use language that expresses hate or portrays abuse against fat or fat people, please do it only in the areas clearly marked for those purposes.
I saw this terrible thread where this fat woman sat on this dude's face. How come this disclaimer does nothing to protect thin people??! Everytime I see a bbw now I just hysterically blurt out "oh god please don't crush me." I almost got fired once as a result. I'm gonna sue that pants off this place one day.

Also, based on past profile infractions I made a couple of adjustments..

"Dimensions does not condone the use of irony, farce, sarcasm, satire, or any other form of thought which people cannot take at face value. Dimensions does not condone the use of any remarks which may bring up past issues in the reader. Dimensions does not condone the use of honesty if it makes people feel remotely uncomfortable. Dimensions does not condone hatred or abuse against fat people. If you must use language that expresses hate or portrays abuse against fat or fat people, please do it only in the areas clearly marked for those purposes."
 

Fascinita

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I saw this terrible thread where this fat woman sat on this dude's face. How come this disclaimer does nothing to protect thin people??! Everytime I see a bbw now I just hysterically blurt out "oh god please don't crush me." I almost got fired once as a result. I'm gonna sue that pants off this place one day.

Also, based on past profile infractions I made a couple of adjustments..

"Dimensions does not condone the use of irony, farce, sarcasm, satire, or any other form of thought which people cannot take at face value. Dimensions does not condone the use of any remarks which may bring up past issues in the reader. Dimensions does not condone the use of honesty if it makes people feel remotely uncomfortable. Dimensions does not condone hatred or abuse against fat people. If you must use language that expresses hate or portrays abuse against fat or fat people, please do it only in the areas clearly marked for those purposes."
Pretty witty, bdog! I give it a 4.
 

Fascinita

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Prudes. Just let people be who they are. The humiliation side of things was never my bag, but it used to come up a lot in private chats, when I was doing that a lot. I get the feeling that out of the people who want to be fattened (feederism is tolerated here right? At least in fantasy terms?) there is at least a double digit percentage where humiliation is a facet of what turns them on. To be derided by loved ones, people in general but especially lovers for being fat is a turn on for some people.

You aren't any better than them just because what they find erotic you find offensive.
You aren't any better than "prudes" just because you find their opinions offensive.
 
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