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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 7

I’ve known for a while now that the change was coming, but I wouldn't allow myself to celebrate until it was a done deal. I have been serving as EyeGuard’s general counsel for a long time, and as of today, I am the president and chief operating officer of EyeWatch. The change in title brings an even heftier salary and a yearly six figure bonus. In the next 5 years when Doug retires, he wants me to take role of chief executive officer and chairman of the company. I’ll be shadowing him often in the next two years while also working harder to fulfill my new role as president and COO. This is going to be a lot of hard work professionally and personally, but I’m ready for it.

My footsteps sounded heavy as I walked down the hallway toward the conference room. My 12pm lunch conference was 30 minutes away, but I always arrive a half hour early. I like to be the first one there so I can review and collect my thoughts. If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. That’s my motto.

My breathing was coming out pretty thick as I rounded toward the water fountain. I can’t believe I’m out of breath just by speed walking. I definitely took my in-shape days for granted. One doesn’t think about all the benefits that a healthy body provides when they purposely eat like shit and blow up into a butterball. Or maybe others do, I don’t know. Maybe I went into this whole thing a little too quickly, and with my head in my ass. All I know is that it feels good, and I’d do it all over again if given the chance to start from square one. I think.

I don’t think I’ll hit my goal of 300lbs by the New Year, but I’ll continue my mission until I do, and then I’m going to eat cleaner and workout again. I won’t do it to lose fat, but I do want to be careful about things, although losing weight will most likely be the result of eating healthy and getting back into fitness. I just know that the next 2 years will be a very arduous process that will affect the rest of my career, and I want to make sure I’m physically and mentally able to carry on this load. Because right now I’m carrying a lot of fat in this belly, and just walking down the hallway makes everything bounce up and down, and very obviously.

I ran my hand to the bottom of my paunch, and it quivered under my step. It was heavy, and when I filled my belly up real good, my underbelly became pleasingly soft in contrast to the hard orb of my upper belly. Those were my favorite moments. I felt like a fat house cat lounging on it’s back.

God, and I love the way my belly stretches outward on the sides when I get my fill up. It feels like it’s a completely different part of my body when it distends outward with a disgusting quantity of food. That satiated, too fat to move feeling of gluttony is incomparable. The cherry on top is when Brooke touches me with her small hands and kisses me all over my puffed up body with her plump, sexy pout. I’ve never wanted to stop and continue something so much in my entire life. I want to be the glutton, but I don’t want to live as a glutton. I want to eat the food and make myself fat, but I don’t want to completely leave the life I’ve known for so long. This is where I get confused. These are the thoughts that go through my head just before I eat myself into oblivion. I experience the euphoria, and then a few hours later the guilt creeps in, and then I get hungry for my next meal. And the process just repeats itself.

I bent down at the fountain to wet my dry throat, and I saw a pair of legs that went on for days stop at the side. It was Lauren, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t expect to see her there, either.

I’ve known Lauren since I was a fresh out of law school newbie at EyeWatch. She’s always worked in a different department, but our office perimeters are close enough to bump into each other every once in a while, especially on conference days.

When we first met as young, single newbies, we nurtured a heavy flirting relationship for 2 years before we moved into anything sexual. Then one night, when we all went out as a group for a few beers, Lauren and I let our caged up hunger for each other loose in the drunkenness of the bar. We stayed longer than everyone else, both of us fully aware of what we wanted out of each other.

Lauren is hard woman to ignore. She’s got an exotic look to her that men crave. Bouncy long dark hair, overly plump lips, legs for days. She’s lean and tall, around 5’8, and very smart. After we had sex the first time, we agreed that we should not make it a regular thing. But it totally became a regular thing.

It wasn’t just the sex I was after, because I did want to love her. And for two years I tried, but I just couldn’t get there. There would be times that I would beg myself to take the chance with her, but I couldn’t get over the fact that I felt like I’d be settling. Making it even more difficult was the fact that I couldn’t find any reason to justify my lack of “getting there” with Lauren, and it guilted me.

A beast was inside of me, clawing at my insides in nervous anticipation, just waiting for the chance to latch onto someone worthy of my love. I knew that if the beast hadn’t released itself after two years of knowing someone mentally and physically as I did with Lauren, that I was just settling. I still continued to see her though, and to let her feelings develop for me. To this day, I feel bad for it, but I’ve done my share of apologizing throughout the years.

Our love making often ended with her laying on my chest and Lauren talking about our future together. The “what if’s” and “wouldn’t this be nice” type of things. And everything was great, but it wasn’t love. I would have rather lived a loveless life than a life filled with resentment toward a woman who couldn’t fulfill me no matter how hard she tried. Lauren and I took a long weekend vacation together, where we played house and pretended like everything was alright, and would stay
alright. But I knew it wouldn’t, and Lauren knew it wouldn’t, although she said she would give anything just to make me stay.

After that vacation, I broke off everything with Lauren. I’d see her around the office looking like a bus had hit her, and I felt like a dick to know I was the reason. I questioned myself and thought that maybe I was just way too hard to please, maybe my standards were too high. Maybe I just had unrealistic expectations. All I knew was that in a relationship, I had only ever seen grey. I wanted to see red.

The very next week, I saw Brooke.

I felt a judgmental finger sink slow and deep into the side of my flesh as I drank my water at the fountain. I waited until my thirst was quenched before standing up to look at the pretty face in front of me. One eyebrow extended up while a small smirk played on her lips, and then she slowly prodded the soft globe of my belly, right above my belly button, like she had that privilege.

I wiped a drip of water off my chin, the chin that I was born with, not the chin I had created recently.

“Can I help you?”

“Congratulations on the promotion.”

Her twiggy arms were crossed under her not so generous chest. Looking at Lauren now, and knowing who she really is behind the mirror, I could list off a million reasons on why I couldn’t get there with her almost a decade ago. For one, she’s unstable. But also, she’s no Brooke.

“Thank you.”

“Must be nice to have the privilege of knowing the CEO since boyhood.” I knew what she was doing. She always did this shit.

“Now that you mention it, it is nice knowing Doug, because Doug is a swell guy. But if you’re hinting at me not deserving a promotion, then don’t allow your bitterness to expel the real reason I got it: Hard work, thousands of extra hours of my personal time, leadership abilities, and my genuine love for people -just to name a few- got me to where I am now.”

“Love for people? Zach, you are as selfish as they come. You’re out for you, and only you. You don’t care who you step on or use in the process.”

It’s no secret that Lauren has been bitter since our breakup. I understand how it wasn’t easy for her to see her ex-lover move on so quickly. I know she was devastated, and over the years I’ve apologized profusely. But I’m don’t apologizing now. All is fair in love and war.

A headache pulsed inside my brain. I rubbed my face to try and wipe it away. This victim mentality has gotten way out of hand.

“Lauren, you’re doing it again. You’re bringing up the past, which I have apologized for..”

“Your apologies mean nothing! Nothing you do or say will be enough! I gave my everything to you, and you left me to bleed out while you moved on along to built a life with Brooke. Your words are shit, because the damage is already done.”

“Exactly. You just admitted it. I don’t have the power to help you move along. Maybe speaking with a therapist will benefit you. Now, I want to make something very clear to you. I will speak with you any time over professional matters at EyeWatch, but this interaction right now will be the last time I speak to you in regards of our past. Because Lauren, it’s been eight fucking years since then, and it’s all just inconsequential to me now.”

I didn’t give Lauren a chance to respond before walking away.
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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 8

The mild pressure of water massaging my scalp felt wonderful as the conditioner rinsed from my hair. The steam of the shower mixed with the scent of my shampoo released the small anxieties that had crept inside of my mind throughout the day. One of the first jokes my dad created with Zach was about my love for long showers, which developed the name “hour power shower,” which was also quite an embellishment.

It’s true, I do love a good, steamy shower, but there’s always the affliction of getting out. All of a sudden your warm skin gets shocked by the chill of the air. The torture of it all feels illegal. I turned off the water and quickly wrapped my thick cotton robe over my body and shivered hard, as if to shake the cold off before stepping onto the white marble tile. My robe stayed on as I warmed up and dried my hair, and afterward, I carefully slipped on the delicate lingerie teddy I bought while window shopping a few weeks ago. Originally it was intended for one of Zach’s Christmas surprises, but it will be perfect for tonight. The lace material is thin and leaves a generous portion of my torso exposed for Zach’s hands and mouth to explore. There is essentially no back to this teddy, just super thin black straps.

My toes did a slow turn on the tile as I checked my reflection in the mirror. Zach is going to really appreciate this one.

Being in tune with my sexuality has been one of my top priorities as a woman, and especially as a mother. I love my body, and I’m not talking about the way it looks. I love what my body can do: what it can carry, what it can birth, how it moves, how it can make Zach crazy...

If a day comes where I look in the mirror and hate what I see, then I’ll know something is amiss inside of me. I’ll know that I’m trying to please something that doesn’t exist. After all, standards are only subjective.

My hair was fixed into a volume of big, loose waves that framed my high cheek bones and delicate chin. I dabbed a little of my sheer eyeshadow on and swiped my signature style of black eyeliner across my lids, adding more mascara at the end. Always. My dress was a muted red long sleeved wrap dress with a plunging neckline. The polyester clung to my body perfectly, and of course, the wrap of the dress made removing it super convenient. I made sure that all evidence of my slinky lingerie was covered before smirking at myself and moving along to finish with dinner.

The heels of my boots echoed with purpose as I walked to the kitchen and down a few steps into our wine cellar. My fingers brushed over the bottles until they landed on a Cabernet Sauvignon to pair with the steak.

Butterflies fluttered in my tummy as I heard the buzz of the garage door. Up until this point, I have sat back and watched Zach pack his belly with enough food to cause a massive weight gain on his once lean frame. I have suffered in silence, I have sat on my hands, I have swallowed my approving moans, and I have ached in wet desire as my husband did all the work on the other side of the table. I have wanted to help Zach push every delicious piece of food past his perfect mouth, but I have refrained. I didn’t want to project my secret desires onto my husband, because in my mind, voicing my desire for my husband to grow fat was the same as a man voicing his desire for a woman to be skinny. And this entire year, I have silenced my words of approval. I have silenced myself into the submission of Zach’s weight gain. But now I know that he’s been stuffing his face and gaining weight on purpose, and behind my back, at that. He’s been having all the fun without me, and that doesn’t sit well with me.

So tonight...tonight I’m going to unleash the Brooke that has been holding herself back for an entire year now. Tonight, I’m going to make sure Zach is crystal clear about where I stand regarding his weight.
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Sep 1, 2019
Zach placed his briefcase and keys in the mud room before walking through the hallway leading to the kitchen. A pulse in my nether region set off into an alarming rhythm at the sight of my husband, who regardless of being fat, was still handsome and sexy as hell.

He smirked one of his famous grins and ran a gentle hand down the front of his dome, reaching all the way to his fat underbelly, before tugging at the sides of his pants out of habit, as if trying to pull them up.

His cheeks were looking real fat and juicy tonight. A double chin had expanded to meet the sides of his face, and it made his first chin look very, very small in comparison.

Zach embraced my body and met my lips with a warm, slow kiss. His hands moved downward to cup and squeeze my ass.

“Mm, look at you. I like this dress, baby. I love red on you.”

I allowed Zach to twirl me around once before I slyly moved my body into his and brought both hands to the side of his belly. It was really heavy and in a perfect circle. I gently patted its girth and reached up for another kiss, this time taking the time to suck slowly on his fat bottom lip. As I did this, I tried to run my tiny finger along his pants underneath his belt, knowing full well that it wasn’t going to fit. His belly was much to fat to leave any room in his pants anymore.

“You look hungry. Sit, baby, I’ll make you a plate.” I loaded his plate up with so much food that some gravy and mashed potatoes splattered into the kitchen floor.

Filet mignon, mashed potatoes with thick gravy, green bean casserole, honey seared cooked carrots, creamed corn, and loafed bread. I haven’t cooked like this since before Penny was born.

Zach’s eyebrows shot up as he took in his massive serving. “This looks really good, Brooke...How long did you spend cooking today?” He looked almost guilty that I spent so much time on him, like he wasn’t deserving of the extra attention.

This brought me back down to reality for a moment, because Zach cared so much for others that he sometimes forgot how deserving he truly was. It was a reminder I had to repeat every few months to Zach- that it was also okay to be a receiver instead of a giver in our marriage.

“Well, I’m just really proud of you, and I want you to know how much I appreciate how hard you’ve worked over the years to earn your promotion. It’s no easy task to take on so much responsibility at work while also being an attentive father and husband. I want you to know that I see you, always, in your struggles and in your victory, and I love you through them all. You amaze me, Zachary Davis, and you deserve any good thing that comes your way.”

His eyes turned a deep shade of green, like they always did when his cheeks flushed. It was one of the many things I loved about Zach.

“Eat up, baby.”

Zach dug into his food as I reached over his hefty shoulder to pour his wine, and then I took my seat adjacent to him and enjoyed my own plate. As dinner went on, our conversation flowed just as it normally would. I wanted to wait until the perfect opportunity before going in for the kill.

When Zach sat down to eat, his white oxford already strained at the buttons, though hardly. After his third plate, small hills of soft fat formed under the pressure of his buttons. By the fifth plate, those hills turned mountainous and were begging to break free. Just as I thought it was only a matter of time before a button popped, Zach leaned his heavy body back in an attempt to release his belt, and when he did, the button right above his belly button popped off, followed by another button just a second later. Zach’s eyes bulged as he quickly leaned forward to put a hand over the flesh that pushed through the gap of his button down. If only that flesh wasn’t covered by a white undershirt. If only.

Now was the time. That button popping off was my cue. It was the perfect moment to tell Zach that I found his stash of junk and I know what he’s been doing to himself.

“Ahh, there it goes. I’ve been waiting for that to happen for an entire year. I’m impressed it’s only happening now, with as round and swollen as your belly’s looking these days.” I stood up to feel the flesh seeping through the hole of his shirt.

Zach looked more than a little perplexed, but then his confusion turned into a devilish, knowing grin. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me in closer until I stood between his wide legs. His big hands moved to my hips and squeezed the flesh at the back of my ass, giving it a sexy smack, “And I’ve been waiting for you to verbally say something about my round, swollen belly for almost a year now.”

Now I was the confused one, and Zach picked up on it.

“Brooke, do you really think I didn’t know you liked watching me eat and fatten myself up?” He threw back his head and let out a hearty belly laugh that made his fat jiggle with so much force that I didn’t think it would ever come to a stand still.

His laughing stopped and he looked me dead in the eyes before lovingly squeezing my ass again, “I knew you loved it, baby. And I enjoyed watching you squirm, too. Were you seriously waiting for a button to pop off before you said anything?”

“N-no, I uh, I found your stash of junk in the basement and then put all the pieces together. I was waiting for the perfect opportunity to tell you that you’ve been found out. But you threw me off, I didn’t know you knew I liked it so much.”

“Ahh, my stash. Yeah. That’s served me well this past year.” And he patted his fat belly so it jiggled. Here I was, standing in front of Zach caught off guard and speechless, when I was the one who was supposed to be surprising HIM.

His eyes got darker and burned into mine before he broke contact and reached his arms up into a deep, exaggerated stretch. His hands landed on the crest of his full belly, and then he looked at me again, “So, you still want to feed and fatten me up?”

Zach entered his hands underneath my dress and squeezed his palms over my thighs. His long finger pushed the edge of my lingerie away in search of my womanhood. When he found it, his finger slid deep inside of me while his thumb rubbed over my clit. All of a sudden, I was living in the pith of my fantasy, and I couldn’t even find my words to scream YES! So I closed my eyes with a moan and shook my head up and down.

Zach’s voice came out low and slow when he spoke again, “Then do your worst.”
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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 9

My cheeks were warm and my brain felt like it was tingling on overdose. The desire inside of my belly burned so hot that I felt I may pass out. The way Zach touched me did not feel real. I had to force myself to push Zach’s hand away, because this was my fantasy, and in my fantasy, I stuff my husband into a fat oblivion.

My chest heaved up and down, desperately searching for its rhythm “Save that for later, it’s my turn.”

I hauled Zach up by the arms and led him over to the couch, where I gently pushed him down to sit.

“Wait here.”

The bottom of my dress struggled to keep up with my pace as I grabbed the brownies, whipped cream, a half gallon of ice cream and a spoon from of the drawer, without stopping to close it back. I was on a mission.

When I reached Zach again, his pants were off, and I noticed for the first time how much space his body took up. His long arms stretched out on the back of the couch, but that wasn’t what had my attention. I was amazed at the space his wide hips and humongous thighs demanded when he spread them open like that. Zach’s thighs were still impressively muscular and strong, but with the added weight on his body, they had grown to be very meaty as well. And then smack dab in the middle of his long, spread out limbs, was his belly, full and swollen with purposeful gluttony. He looked ripe enough to devour.

I put the goodies and ice cream onto the side table to let it melt for a few minutes. Slowly and methodically, I untied my dress and let it pool by my feet like a puddle. I could feel Zach’s eyes darting over my body, like little lasers, burning my skin with each place they moved, until they landed on my eyes seconds later. Zach’s pupils were dilated and very hungry.

I slid off my boots and crawled slowly onto Zach’s lap. His erection bobbed as I situated myself into position. His hands immediately took ownership of my bare ass, squeezing it slowly like a stress ball and without even realizing it, pushing it slightly against his hardness. I slowly took both of his shirts off and ran my hands over his soft chest and round belly, squeezing the fluffy fat of his underbelly. It was so generous in size that it overtook my hands.

“God, Zach. How the fuck did you get so fat?” I’m still amazed at how much my husband’s body has changed so quickly, “Did you hook up a funnel machine and go to town?”

Zach chuckled at the thought, “No, but that would be kinda fun. I mostly ate non-stop at work, on the road and downstairs in the basement. Eating way past my limit, all the time, and not working out anymore did it’s number on me.” He patted his belly and then wobbled it for good measure.

“You’re making my heart beat really fast, here, feel.” I grabbed Zach’s hand and placed it over my chest, and I heard Zach inhale a deep breath.

I reached over to the ice cream and instructed Zach to eat it, which he did, gladly.

As the ice cream slid down his throat, I kissed his thickened neck and softened jawline. His face had gotten pretty round, but he was still the same Zach. His member twitched underneath me with a passion as he ate his ice cream, so I reached underneath me and massaged his balls while kissing any part of his body my lips could reach, until finally the ice cream was all gone.

When Zach was done, he exhaled a thick breath into the air and rubbed his massively swollen belly. He reached over and grabbed three brownies and ate them with ease. I continued to massage his balls, and every once in a while, I’d slide my hand up his shaft, pumping a few times at his tip, before sliding back down to his balls again.

“God, Brooke. What are you doing to me..”

“Just loving every part of you, that’s all.”

Zach moaned and grabbed a few more brownies. And then, with what very little abdominal muscle Zach still had, he flexed and attempted to grunt his way back onto his feet, throwing me over his thick shoulder.

“Zach! Stop! You’re going to drop me on my head!”

Zach stuffed a brownie past his lips and spoke with a full mouth,“I’m fat, baby, I’m not weak. I can still lift and carry my skinny wife.”

As he made his way to the bedroom with 128 pounds thrown over his shoulder, visuals of Zach with 128 more pounds of fat wobbling all over his body played through my mind. Damn. That was quite the visual.

“Hey...your ass looks even more massive from this point of view.”

“So does yours.” Zach stuffed another brownie in his mouth and smacked my ass hard enough for it to pop and jiggle freely into the air, then he laid me on my back so he could crawl on top of me with his heavy body.

His belly was distended and very hard to the touch as he pressed it against my tummy, squishing me between himself and the bed. Zach’s mouth brushed over my long neck, nibbling every so often, driving me absolutely crazy. He unhooked my lingerie and peeled it all the way off.

“I have to say, I’m gonna miss this one. I think it’s one of my favorites. Hot..”

“I’ll wear it for you again soon.”

Zach let out a grunt of approval at my proposal as he positioned himself to sit back on his knees. With ease, he lifted my hips so that my legs were hanging between his biceps and forearms, and then slowly, he entered me.

When Zach was all the way in, he thrusted very slowly a few times and then took a sharp breath before closing his eyes. “Don’t move, s-s-shit, don’t move, baby.” More heavy breathing followed.

As he composed himself, I softly rubbed the sides of the fat, furry belly that rested between my legs, reaching even closer to my face as the months went by.

Zach thrusted slowly again once more and then stopped. “I’m really sensitive right now. If I keep going, I’m going to come inside you pretty quickly.”

“Here, let’s change positions. I’ll be on top.”

Zach maneuvered his body where he was propped up on his back, and I watched in much delight as his belly jiggled and quivered with every little move he made.

When he was good and ready, I positioned myself on top of his lap and yelped out of surprise at how deep he immediately went. I had to lean my hands on his shoulders to help brace myself up, since his hips were too wide for my legs now. As I moved up and down, Zach seemed much better to continue on without having to blow his load.

His lips found their way to my breasts, and he took one in his mouth and kissed it with hunger as his other hand grabbed the flesh of my hip. Then, very gently, he laid his huge hand flat on the front of my belly and kept it there while we continued to make love.

When I was pregnant with Penny, this is the area where Zach would place his hands during love making. It was his sole focus. I don’t even think he was meaning to do it now, but it was a sentiment toward how much he wanted another baby.

A few weeks ago when we were unsure if I was pregnant or not, we sat down the next morning and spoke in depth about our feelings toward the matter. Of course, Zach’s stance was that he wanted a baby, and my stance was not so simple. I was honest with him- I told him I would like to have another baby at some point, but I needed some time to think things over.

And when I felt Zach’s hand touch me tenderly as we made love, I knew it was time.
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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 10

It was a few nights later, after I was done putting Penny to bed, that I finally approached Zach on my desire to have another baby.

I quietly stepped down the stairs to see Zach securing our Christmas tree to the floor, which was not as simple as it may seem. Christmas tradition for the past 6 years of our marriage has been to go to the tree farm to pick out a massive pine tree. Our living room is stately with a 24 ft ceiling, so the tree has to be big enough to compete with space and not be swallowed by an expansive box. Zach lifted his arms to reach something on the tree, and a very ponderous belly peeked out the bottom of his shirt, which hugged his body just a tad too tight. I thought about what he looked like last year at this time, 200 maybe 215 pounds? I don’t know his weight now, but I know his goal is 300 pounds by the New Year.

With Zach’s company holiday party tomorrow night, our family’s Christmas feasts in a few weeks, and all the stuffing of his belly I plan to continue doing, I don’t think he’ll have trouble reaching that amount.

Arousal and desire shot through every vessel in my body as I looked at Zach. When I first met him eight years ago, I would have never imagined that the healthy eating and fitness fanatic man I hungered for and made love to regularly would become the man I’m looking at right now. Unless I really sit to think about it, the reality of it all doesn’t play in my mind that often. Zach’s weight fell pretty evenly onto his body, with more prominence in his belly area as of late, just because of it’s constant fill of food. But Zach looked really good with the weight on him, and I’m not the only one who’s mentioned that. So yes, he is fat, but I wouldn’t say he’s outrageously so.

I walked toward my husband and stood on my tip toes to stretch my hands up and around his neck. He smelled so warm and inviting, like always. I could breathe his scent in all day.

Zach’s hands slowly rubbed up and down the length of my back, stopping every so often to massage a spot that I didn’t even know needed massaging. During Zach’s skinnier days, when I wrapped my arms around his body, my head fell right at his chest. Now that he’s got much more girth to his front, my head doesn’t quite reach where it used to. With me being so short, his belly can sometimes get in the way, especially when really full.

I pulled Zach’s head down into my space and slowly began kissing his lips. His mouth opened in response and our tongues met like velvet. I twirled one of Zach’s thick wavy strands between my fingers and then found another spot to twirl before I moved my hands down his thick neck.

“Babe. Are you listening?”

“You have my full attention.”

“Okay, good. Don’t forget that you and Penny will be here by yourselves tomorrow morning while I pick up my gown and your suit for the party tomorrow night, and then I have some other last minute errands to run before family comes in town next week...”

I look forward to Zach’s company holiday party every year. It’s extravagant, it’s flashy, it’s ridiculously over the top where I get an excuse to wear a gown and flashy jewelry...but most importantly, I get to see Zach in a suit and bow tie, and I’m a sucker for my husband in a suit and bow tie.

“...and Sarah will be here tomorrow afternoon around 3pm, because remember, she’s staying the night in the guest room since we’ll be staying at a hotel down town after the party...”

Zach wasn’t paying attention, I could already tell by the way his hands touched my body.

“...and I wanted to tell you that I’m ready to have another baby.”

It took Zach several seconds before my words registered in his brain.

“You’re serious?”

“Yes. I’m serious, I want a baby.”



Zach swooped me into his arms and carried me the long trek passed the long corridor, through the foyer, and around the corner of another short hallway before entering into our master bedroom. The entire way taunting,

“I’m going to give you twins.”

“No you’re not.”

“...So many babies.”

“I said one.

“...All the babies.”

“No you’re not, but okay.”

The last time we tried to get pregnant, it took 2 whole months, which isn’t really long considering there’s only a short window of each month that a man has the chance to impregnate a woman. But in order to make things more interesting, when we tried to get pregnant with Penny, we tried to have as much sex as we could in random places. The funniest one being in a Target store fitting room. I refused at first due to germs, but I finally gave in and pulled a sanitation wipe out of my purse and wiped the plastic bench down really good. Zach sat his bare butt down and I straddled him and we went to town. His ass kept sliding against the bench, creating that distinct sound that only comes from bare skin sliding on a plastic surface. I was snickering so hard that I couldn’t even focus, and Zach had to bob me up and down on his lap so he could orgasm. When we walked out into the fitting room area, we definitely had many knowing looks and stare downs. It took us over a year to have the guts to return to that particular Target store. We still laugh about it each time we drive by.

Even though Zach and I have a really healthy sex life, there is something different in the air when trying to make a baby. It’s special, savory, and more languid. It’s intentional.

Zach laid me down ever so gently and stripped himself of his clothes before slowly removing mine. He crawled his heavy body next to me and intertwined our fingers together, kissing the top of my hand before speaking,

“Brooke Davis, I love you. I never thought I’d have this opportunity again, so I’m truly thankful for this moment. You've given me more than I have ever wanted in life, and you truly make me the happiest man in the world. I notice all the sacrifices you make for me. Thank you.”

And with that, our baby making journey began for the second time.
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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 11

I knew the moment I saw the sumptuous burgundy colored velvet of the gown that I needed to have it for Zach’s company’s holiday black tie event. I tried other gowns on for the sake of humoring my sister Meg, but I knew in the back of my mind that no other dress would compare. The gown was off the shoulder with a sweetheart neckline, the backline slanting into a soft V, settling just under my delicate shoulder blades. The velvet material hugged my shape like a second skin all the way to mid thigh, where a slit developed in the fabric, followed by a generous amount of velvet tiered ruffles that swept to the floor. My hair looked like a sea of shiny and thick, bouncing curls.

I swiped my newly manicured hands over the soft velvet covering my hips, and my tummy began to flutter as the doorman welcomed us inside of the swanky ball room. They weren’t nervous flutters that one gets around big crowds sometimes. These felt different. These were flutters for my husband, who looked more handsome than I’d ever seen him before, with his ponderous belly covered by a black vest, black suit, and black velvet bow tie. He always says that I make him look good, and I beg to differ. He does good on his own, both physically and socially.

I have nothing to do with the crowds that congregate around Zach each time he enters a room. He is a magnet for people of every kind; quick to smile, slow to interrupt, eager to listen. His natural aura gives off a powerful vibe, but he hardly uses it for his advantage. If Zach ever acted crassly toward someone, I would be very surprised, but also, I know that the person’s demeanor would have to be the equivalent of what a constant slow and heavy drip of water feels like between one’s eyes.

Zach holds himself to a very high standard, but somehow he is able to show others unmatchable grace and patience when they mess up or offend. I’d say Zach’s biggest character flaw is that he’s too patient with others. Unlike me, who has patience for people up to a certain degree, and that degree depending on a multitude of factors. I guess they can both be flaws, depending on who you ask.

As the faces acknowledged his arrival, and as the crowds flocked toward him, Zach gently rested his big comforting hand to the small of my back. It was his way of saying I’m about to get swarmed by conversation, you’re about to get spoken to as my subordinate, but you are important to me, I see you.

When Zach and I first got married, the “lesser than the man” mentality really chapped my ass with Zach’s company. EyeWatch was a company full of old conservatives with traditional man and woman roles, inside the work place and even more so at home. As society changed, EyeWatch became a little more modernized, but there were still obstacles to over come. Zach squeezed the softness of my side as he saw Doug and Susan make their way toward us.

The first time I met Doug was when I was a young teenager. He was a business friend to my dad and sought out his help regarding many legal questions over the years. As Doug aged, he slowly turned into a replica of the old man on the box of monopoly.

Doug and Susan greeted me with a kiss on the cheek, and the scent of alcohol was very heavy on Doug’s breath. He stole Zach in conversation, leaving me and Susan to chat about the same old shit that we always do.

“Brooke, how is little Penny doing with her nanny, is she still okay? Have you given any more thought on what I suggested in our last conversation? A mother's role is so vital to young growing minds.” Susan was speaking of our last conversation, where she tried to convince me how damaging it is for mothers to work instead of staying at home.

“Yes, a mother’s role is very important to the developing mind. I’m so glad that I have the luxury of choosing to work three days a week, while also being home early enough to feed and bathe Penny on most of those evenings. Penny loves Mrs. Sarah, which really helps me feel better while I’m at work. I know she’s in great hands.” It’s so hard to bite my tongue during these conversations. If she wasn’t Doug’s wife, I’d let her have a piece of my mind.

“Well, dear, if you feel so guilty about leaving little Penny with a nanny, then why don’t you just stay home with her, especially now that Zach’s promotion more than likely covers your salary?” The most disturbing thing about Susan’s comments was that she thought she was offering words of encouragement. She thought her advice was vital in helping me solve a problem that only existed in her mind.

“Ah, a mother’s guilt. It never ends, does it?” I made sure to use my sweetest voice while painting the most delightful smile on my face as I spoke. Not even a second later, Doug’s voice barged it’s way over to me, actually making me flinch and jump a little at it’s drunken momentum,

“Brooke! What do you think about this here belly Zach’s got on ‘em now?”

If Doug only knew.

As he asked his question, Doug started off by pointing at Zach’s expanse, but he ended by forcefully patting it up toward the top, making his belly jiggle and bounce.

Zach looked down at me with a closed lipped smile, clearly amused. My eyes left Zach’s face to glance at his bouncing belly, and I counted three generous bounces with no end in sight before I looked back up to meet his eyes again, and then we both lost ourselves in a fit of laughter.

Zach put a stop to the jiggles by placing a hand over his belly, “Doug you cant just go around bouncing a fat man’s belly like that, you could knock somebody out.”

Susan looked at me and then at Zach’s belly. “Well, good heavens Brooke, what have you been feeding him!”

I answered with a genuine laugh, “I assure you, Susan, that Zach is fully capable of feeding himself.”

“The boy has developed a healthy appetite, Susan, let ‘em live a little. I need another drink.”

Doug turned and walked away, and Susan followed her husband after nodding her head to the both of us, as if to say goodbye.

We finally stood by ourselves in the middle of a crowded room of people. Zach leaned down to kiss me softly before placing his hand on top of his empty belly, “And I need food.”
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Sep 1, 2019
Our first stop was to the open bar. Zach started off with his usual drink of rum and coke, and I ordered a delectable glass of champagne for myself. I did not drink champagne often, although it was one of my favorite alcoholic drinks to taste. I fell in love with the bubbling sophistication of it as a teenager while still living under the comfort of my family home. My parents allowed me to have a glass every year on Christmas Eve and New Years. It held a special value to me, and I wanted to savor such good things.

As Zach and I waited for our drinks, I looked around and noticed an attractive woman that looked to be my age, maybe a little older, glaring in our direction. I thought it was odd and brushed off the staring as a coincidence. We’ve all been guilty of staring off into space. Maybe she was looking elsewhere, or perhaps beyond my shoulder. But when Zach was loading up a generous plate of hors d’oeuvres in a completely different area of the ballroom, I happened to see her glaring in our direction again.

“Who is that woman standing over by the bar, in the black sequined dress?”

Zach discretely looked behind his brow toward the bar. When his eyes fell on the woman, they were quick to look back down toward his plate. The woman seemed to catch him by surprise, and he stuck a massive mac and cheese ball into his mouth.

“That’s Lauren.”

Nothing else about her was offered, and another mac and cheese ball went into his mouth quickly.

“Oh, I’ve never heard you mention her name and I don’t recognize her face. Is she new?” She was still glaring in our general direction. It was super weird.

“No, she started at EyeWatch around the same time as me, although in a different department, so I have no reason to talk about her. And she hasn’t attended a work event in probably 8 years.”

“Well, she’s been been staring at us since we were at the bar. She looks angry. Is she...okay?” The woman definitely wasn’t trying to hide how obvious it was, either.

“Ignore Lauren. She’s well known around the company for being bitter.”

That was a very odd thing for Zach to say about someone, especially a woman. But she did look bitter, so he was just stating the obvious.

“Did she bring a date with her? I mean, is she married...?”

“No,” an entire cheesy potato skin went into Zach’s mouth, “I wouldn’t be surprised if Lauren hasn’t had a date in...” Zach let out a breath as he thought, “I don’t know, many years.”

“Well, she’s a beautiful woman. Too bad she’s bitter like that.” And then I turned my back to the dark cloud and fed my husband another large potato skin, wiping the cheese from the corner of his mouth.

We found our names at our assigned table and took our seats. I was happy to see that Doug and Susan were seated at a table next to us and not with us. Also seated at our table was Frances, Zach's secretary, and her husband, John. Frances was in her 70s and had been with the company from the beginning days of EyeWach. She knew everything there was to know about the company and had a reputation of being a bit indiscreet regarding her thoughts on people and situations. Frances sometimes overstepped the line, but she was undeniably devoted to Zach, and as someone who didn’t always see the best in people like Zach did, she was great at leveling him out.

After we finished our salads, the servers brought out the main dish: roasted chicken with the skin on, asparagus, garlic roasted mashed potatoes and fresh bread. Dessert was a generous piece of rich, creamy cheesecake.

Zach all but licked his dinner plate and dessert plate clean. And after being too full to take more than two bites of my own dessert, Zach finished that, too.

He leaned back with his hands behind his head and stretched out a very full belly. It looked heavy and satiated as it sat behind his vest.

I reached under the table and squeezed a good chunk on the inside of Zach’s meaty thigh. I didn’t have to reach far, because with the way Zach was spread out, his long leg was already invading my space.

I turned toward my husband and let my hair fall enough over my face so that only he could see my lips move, making sure I spoke low enough for only his ears to hear, too.

“I hope you brought your appetite tonight, because I’m not done with that fat belly just yet.”

This caused Zach to take a deep breath in, and as he slowly exhaled, his voice came out as a low and vibrating hum, “I already told you, Mrs. Davis. Do your worst.”

Something dropped into my lower belly, and I could feel my womanhood ripen at the visual of Zach laying on our hotel bed, flat on his back, belly swollen and fat with food that I shoved his way.

Suddenly, I couldn’t wait to get out of there.


Sep 1, 2019
It was a little after 10pm by the time we got away from the party, and as we drove the few miles toward our hotel, I instructed Zach to pull into a burger joint drive thru.

“Hi, can I have two orders of a #3 and one order of your chicken strip meal, with a chocolate shake subbed for the drink.”

Zach quickly looked over at me from the driver’s seat. It was too dark to see his face, but he said absolutely nothing as he pulled his card out of his wallet and rested his elbow out the window, rubbing one of his luscious tufts of hair between his fingers.

“Keep that out, I’m not done.”

“You’re a greedy little thing, you know that?”

“Don’t fault a woman for knowing what she wants.”

The car was still shadowed, but I had no problem seeing Zach adjust a bulge at the front of his pants before pulling beside the window to collect his bags of food.

When he drove off, I instructed Zach to pull into a parking lot a few entrances away.

“This lot right here?”

“Yeah, I need your card. I’ll be back. Stay parked here under the light.”

The night’s wind had a teeth chattering chill to it as I hurried my little body inside the supermarket. Right off the bat, my eyes spotted what I was looking for, so I grabbed the box of two dozen glazed donuts and headed to the self check out line. I smiled to myself. Nice knowing ya, donuts. These little suckers will be a wonderful addition to Zach’s waistline. I tried to ignore all the extra attention I was getting for being alone, in a formal gown, and at such a late hour into the night, but I’d seen some scary shit lately on the documentaries I’ve been watching. I basically ran back to Zach’s car and shut the door quickly.

“You alright?”

“Yeah,” My tone sounded cool and peachy-keen in hopes that it would hide any fear that just ran through my brain. Then I rubbed my palm on the side of Zach’s gut and smiled, “I’m ready now.”

“She has spoken.” And he put the car into drive.

Inside of our hotel room, I immediately embraced Zach in a hot kiss and wrapped my arms around his girth to squeeze as tightly as I could. His breath let out a quick punch as I did so. I loved how his belly could feel squishy, but also so firm at the same time when pressed up against my front. I also loved how far apart my hands were from connecting to each other. They weren’t even close.

Zach took his suit jacket off and loosened his bow tie as he sat relaxed up against the array of pillows splayed around the headboard.

“Get comfortable. You might not be able to move after I’m done with you.”

“Quick, before we proceed any further, I need to clarify,” I could already tell he was about to be a smart ass, “When you say ‘not be able to move,’ do you plan to kill me, or to feed me?”

“I would never kill you. Who would bring me my coffee? I can’t trust Penny to responsibly work around piping hot beverages for another 2 years.”

“You would have a 3 and a half year old to bring you piping hot coffee?”

“Worse things would happen if I didn’t have my morning coffee at all.”

“Now that is some major truth right there.”

I reached an arm behind my body to find the zipper of my dress, and I slowly removed the velvet, making sure my footing didn’t fall down on any of the delicate material. I removed the pasties from my nipples and pulled on a sleeveless white shirt over my torso. I decided against pants and let my cheeks generously hang out of the panties I wore that night. You know, in case Zach needed a pick me up.

Zach brought his hands to his face and slid them down dramatically, “Brooke, why are you taunting me...”

“Eat up and I’ll give you a prize.”

“I’m gonna give you a prize.” And Zach dug in to his food.

After eating the two double cheeseburgers, Zach took his vest and shirt off, leaving him bare chested and still in his pants. After eating a few chicken fingers with gravy, he adjusted his pants lower under his belly, but quickly decided to just unhook them completely. His belly shook in one big wave as it dropped lower.

Zach let out a satiated sound as he rubbed his very, very full belly. I shifted on the bed and could feel how wet I was, watching my husband stuff himself full of food.

“Keep going, Zachary Davis.”

Zach finished off the rest of his chicken fingers and gravy, as well as the two pieces of fluffy toast that came with the meal, and was well on his way to finishing his chocolate milkshake.

I pressed lightly at the top of his shinny belly. His skin was pulled so tight around that area, and it distended outward on the sides.

“You look like you’re gonna pop.”

“Mm, I think I’m about to.”

“Good, keep going.” I crawled into his lap and massaged his sore, distended sides before noticing thin dark pink lines around the bottom of Zach's hefty underbelly. They were faint and camouflaged underneath his fur, but they were definitely new. I don’t think Zach even knows about them yet. The fact that Zach had grown stretch marks on his fat belly made my clit ache and throb. I wanted the bottom of his paunch to rub against my womanhood as we made love, but he hadn’t even started on his donuts yet.

I heard the slurp of an empty milkshake cup and assessed the damage.

“How do you feel?”


“Well, you look it, too.”

Zach smacked the underside of his belly a few times to make it wobble in one hefty motion before moaning and rubbing the area lightly.

I moved to the side of Zach’s big body and began to kiss his earlobe and around the area of his thickened neck. I couldn’t help but to lightly bite at his fat cheeks and that super sexy fat that had accumulated underneath his chin. I squeezed his pecs and audibly moaned at their squish. I liked that Zach’s pecs stayed manly in shape, they just grew much much fatter.

Zach’s left arm hooked around my ass and his hand snuck inside of my panties from the back side. He swiped a finger over my pussy and felt just how wet I had become.

“Holy shit, Brooke.”


“How much more food do I have to eat until I can taste you?”

“A box of donuts, but I’m only going to make you eat half, and the rest you have to finish with breakfast tomorrow.”

I got his box of donuts and watched Zach sandwich two together before tearing into them. He had 5 more donuts to go and was clearly losing steam.

“You doing alright?”

“God, I’m humongous.” Zach rubbed his large hands over the orb of his belly, and it was so swollen that it didn’t look to be part of his body.

“You look so fucking hot right now. I need you to finish your donuts so I can have you inside of me.”

Zach sandwiched two at a time again, and finally, the last one went into his mouth. He chewed on that donut for a minute before swallowing.

Zach scooted his body off the pillows, very slowly, until his back was flat onto the bed. He splayed his arms out at his sides as I helped to take his pants off.

“Do you feel sick?”

“No, no. Just really stretched out and super heavy. I even feel like my cheeks gained weight during that binge.”

“Can you move?”

“My belly can move.” And Zach wobbled his gut from side to side.

He strained to roll over, but he did, and he maneuvered himself off of the bed until he was slowly able to stand himself up. His belly was so rounded and hard that it stuck out straight in front of him like humongous beach ball.

Zach rubbed his hands all up and down my back and attempted to kiss me before realizing that his belly was too big for me to reach his face.

“I need to kiss my wife. Try standing on the bed.”

I hopped up on the bed and leaned over to kiss Zach’s plump lips, his tongue tasted like donuts. My nipples perked hard behind my shirt as he squeezed both of my ass cheeks with his hands and kissed my breasts over my thin shirt.

“Mm, that’s better. Now I need to taste something else.” He patted my butt softly and pointed to the bed for me to lay down onto its edge. As I did, Zach slowly lowered his heaviness onto his knees with a thud and pulled my panties off from my body. Zach made a hungry noise with his throat and licked his lips before bringing his face between my thighs.

When his mouth met with my womanhood, I was already so ripe and ready by this point, that all it look was a few soft rubs of his tongue before I felt the most intense orgasm I’d ever experienced in my life.

“Tastiest treat I’ve had all day.” Zach wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, “Flip over, baby.”

Zach heaved himself back up to standing as I took off my shirt and flipped over onto my hands and knees. I felt Zach run his hands over the ribs of my back and down toward the fleshier parts of my hips, where he squeezed as he slowly made his way into my sex from behind. It was the slowest thrusting I’d ever felt from Zach, and I could tell it was because his belly was so full of food. Each time Zach was almost all the way in, he’d squeeze my hips harder, bringing me to him instead of him into me.

“Damnit, Brooke.” Zach’s voice sounded like more of a cry out in desperation, “I’m so turned on right now, I don’t think I can last any longer.”

“Fill me up all the way, then, and make it count.”

Zach pushed as deep as he could go inside of me before completely spilling his seed and collapsing onto the bed.

“Fuck, baby. You have awakened a hunger in me that is insatiable.”

I rubbed Zach’s belly as he tried to catch his breath.

“Wanna feed me the rest of those donuts?”

I hopped off the bed with zest and smiled.

Zach is going to surpass 300 if he keeps it up with this rate.
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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 12

My mom and I situated ourselves at the back of the little cafe we had frequented for years. The second to last Sunday of every month was our time together, and we spent hours talking about anything and everything. My mom was my safe space. Our relationship always felt of value and importance to me, even more so after becoming a wife and mother.

I wrapped my oversized cardigan tighter across my chest and ordered a water with lime and some soup. I hadn't slept well lately, and when I don’t get enough sleep, my appetite takes a nose dive. I always love hosting Zach’s parents during their visits, but when schedules, especially Penny’s, get thrown off, it becomes just a tad less lovely. They moved to Florida a few years ago after retiring, so when they do visit from out of town, they stay for several weeks.

“How is Penny doing with Tony and Joyce?”

“Oh, Penny's having a grand ‘ol time with all of the extra attention she’s receiving. She’s helped Joyce cook and bake in the kitchen all week.”

Joyce’s Christmas candy was addictive, and I don’t even like candy. She always made loads of it, too. Enough for the family and our next door neighbors, and even Zach’s co-workers requested Joyce’s famous Christmas candy.

Joyce was also an amazing cook. I don’t think she even knew how to cook a healthy meal, because her expertise had always been in good old fashioned comfort food.

The first Christmas I spent with Zach, I ate so much of Joyce’s cooking that I almost made myself sick. I was so full that I looked hugely bloated and had to excuse myself to the bathroom to unbutton my jeans. Zach and I had only been dating for two months, and I was mortified when he undressed me later on that night. I would have declined, but it was the first time Zach initiated sex after our little fiasco that took place in the back of my car.

When he took his shirt off, every muscle was still in sight, so I asked how he stayed so skinny while having a mom who could cook like that. He gently eyed my belly and chuckled, “I’m used to it, so it’s not as tempting to me as it is for someone eating it for the first time.”

I remember feeling self-conscious while standing in my bra and panties in front of Zach, but he didn’t look disgusted. In fact, he seemed the total opposite. The way he kissed my full belly that night helped me to understand the difference between sensual and sexual.

Just then, as if my memory and my present life were playing a joke on me, my sister sent me a text saying, “Buy your husband some new shirts. Please.” And a few seconds later, she sent a picture of Zach lounging on the couch with a bloated belly after eating the lunch Joyce had prepared for everyone at home. Several inches of his furry flesh peeped out of the bottom of his t-shirt.

I think Joyce felt sorry for how tired I was, because she offered to cook three meals a day, plus dessert for the entirety of their visit. Zach was clearly reaping the benefits of Joyce’s cooking, because he looked really big. If I wasn’t so exhausted, I’d probably be enjoying a good meal here and there, too.

I kissed Penny's newly washed curls and inhaled her scent before gently laying her sleeping body into her crib. Before leaving Penny’s room, I quietly clicked off the switch to her brightly lit miniature Christmas tree, and tip toed out the door.

Every Christmas up until I left home for college, my mom would pull my miniature Christmas tree from the attic to put inside of my bedroom. She’d give me a budget, then I would hit the drawing board and brainstorm until I knew I had created something great. Even as a kid, it was up to me to pick out the materials, keep track of spending, do money transactions with the cashier, and execute my ideas by bringing my tree to life. Mistakes were sometimes made, but I was so proud of myself each time. During my first Christmas at home as a college freshman, my mom still brought my Christmas tree out of the attic, but that year she asked if we could create something together. We continued the new tradition until I got married.

So, after Christmas last year, I braved the crowds and bought two dozen miniature faux Christmas trees for the purpose of putting one in each bedroom and corridor of the house. I’m glad that I did, because I will always remember the innocence of toddler Penny at Christmastime. The way her pale rounded cheeks lit up with dancing lights in the dim of the room, eyes so big with awe and wonder, fingers pudgy and curious. The magic of it all will always be a memory never too far behind my eyes.

Downstairs, Christmas cheer and good conversation filled all around our house. The lights were dim and a warm fire flickered in the stone fireplace. Everyone engaged in conversation and ate their fill of Joyce’s delicious food, with an array of snack choices and desserts filling up the marble countertops. We drank hot chocolate and wine, some even champagne, and played games and laughed until our cheeks hurt.

We gathered around on our comfortable leather sectional to share stories, with my mom choosing to tell the story of how I was almost scarred for life on Christmas Eve one year. When I was 4 years old, she and my dad jingled a heavy set of bells outside my bedroom window, bellowing “HO HO HO” and shining the red light of my Playskool Color Changing flashlight into my bedroom window, making it look like it was Rudolph’s red nose.

Meg and I shared bunk beds at the time, so she added to the story, “Brooke screamed bloody murder and jumped underneath our bed, and also brought a blanket with her so she could cover up her entire body with it, because you know, extra precaution. Anyway, my mom rushed back inside the house and had to tell Brooke that it was just her and dad, not Santa and Rudolph.”

Zach threw his head back and bellowed out a hearty laugh. And as he did this, a big hand covered the expanded area under his cushy chest, and his full, ample double chin accentuated itself by the way he held his neck.

Sometimes I really can’t believe how handsome Zach is. I’m more than attracted to him. I always have been, no matter his size. I feel like I’m spellbound by his soul. I’d follow him anywhere. I’d go through hell and fire with him. Earlier in the day during my meditation time, I realized that perhaps it’s not Zach’s heavier body that enraptures me- I have loved him both small and big. I think that because I love Zach so much, it pleases me to see him indulge in something that brings him comfort and satisfaction, because he deserves it. And I find myself enjoying the aftereffect of Zach’s indulgence, because with food, I can tangibly see and keep quantum on his happiness. It makes me happy to see him fat, because it makes me happy to see him happy.

“Why would you scream at the thought of Santa and Rudolph delivering toys to your home on Christmas? It’s every kid’s dream!”

Zach had a beautiful gleam in his eyes, a gleam I knew all too well.

“I don’t know! I really thought it was them, too.”

Zach scooted my small body against his side, so I leaned into his cushiness and tucked my knees to my chest. He felt like base to me. I don’t know why the stars aligned as they did when they brought me and Zach together. I don’t know why I got so lucky to know this love, this life. I shudder to think what life would have been like if it had turned out any other way for me. I know that it wouldn’t have been bad, per se. But there’s a good life, and then there’s life with Zach.
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Sep 1, 2019
After everyone had gone to their respected rooms, Zach and I snuggled on the couch, admiring our tree and all the presents neatly stacked underneath it.

Zach’s stomach growled and broke the brief pause we had taken in conversation.


“I’m not, actually, but I think this thing has a mind of its own now.”

I snuggled in closer underneath his arm and rubbed the bottom of his belly. It was pretty soft these days. If I squeezed it with my hand, I could get more than a handful of delicious, soft fat.

I spread my fingers out and slowly pressed my hand into Zach’s underbelly and watched it completely sink into a pillow of flesh. I repeated the same thing higher up on the side of his belly, but I didn’t get as deep as his underbelly.

“You look so handsome, babe.”

“I look fat.”

“Handsome and fat.”

Zach turned his face to meet mine and smiled genuinely at my comment. He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear before kissing my forehead, my nose, and then my lips.

We continued to slowly make out without touching each other sexually. Zach took a deep breath in before hooking his hand around my thigh to pull me into his lap. My womanhood slid completely over his underbelly as he did this, and I couldn’t help but to press my hips into his vast softness, just a few times though.

This went on for several long minutes until Zach pulled off and kissed my nose before resting his forehead to mine. He slowly rubbed his big hands up and down my thighs as he spoke.

“I was thinking it would be nice for us to get away. Somewhere with clear blue water and a white sandy beach. We’ve been so busy this holiday and I miss my wife.”

“That sounds so good. I’ve been trying really hard to wean Penny to one nursing session before bedtime. It’s made me a little sad, but maybe looking forward to this trip will give me a little boost in trying harder.”

“Aw, babes, don’t be sad. We can wait, I don’t want to rush you. I know it’s personal.” He smiled and studied my face before tucking another thick strand behind my ear again, and moved his hands up to squeeze my sides.

“Knowing that I’ll have another baby to bond with soon makes me feel a little better. I’ll be more proactive about it. I really want to take a break and go off somewhere with you. Work has been killing me lately with most of my sessions being about the holidays and winter blues, and I need a refresh.”

I looked down to his pecs and couldn’t hold myself back any longer. I took both of my hands and laid them over the squish and slowly squeezed, feeling the depth of his fattened chest.

“Ugh, I know. Never in a million years did I think I’d have man boobs. It’s the one part of my body that I hate since gaining weight. And also this.” He reached up and felt his generous double chin.

“I love every part of you, not just certain areas. But I want to let you know something, okay?”


“If you ever feel like you want to stop with...this...” I hefted his belly up and let it drop, “Then I want you to know that I will support you. It’s you I want, not a body type.”

“I know, baby. And thank you for always supporting me. But I think right now, I’m good to keep going. I’m not wanting to get too big, but I am curious as to what a little more weight would feel like. After the holidays I’m going to start walking and lifting, but I’d like to continue gaining upward every so often just to see what that higher number feels like. I don’t want to gain so fast like I have lately. I want to keep it healthy, because I can tell when I just eat shit that my face bloats up like a water balloon. Just look at how fat it’s gotten.”

I kissed Zach’s fattened jawline and whispered, “Whatever you want, baby, I’m here for it.”

“I want some more casserole, I want pie. I want you. I want more pie, and then I want sleep. In that order. ”

“I can make it happen.”


Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 13

I bit into my apple as I jotted a few sloppy notes onto my planner. My Tuesday’s are the equivalent of everyone else’s Monday’s, since I only work part time in my office. I have a steady clientele with a schedule that’s pretty consistent- only a few surprises here and there- but for as long as I’ve been a therapist, the holiday season has always been filled with unpredictability.

I’ve come to expect the month of December to be chaotic. Clients traveling need a day or time slot outside of their normal schedule. I get “seasonal clients,” who need help regulating their anxiety caused by a plethora of things: extended family, in-laws, ex-spouses sharing custody, financial disappointments, loneliness, extra alcohol consumption, suicidal thoughts, you name it and I see it. And because my clients need me, I arrange my schedule and work days that I’m off. Or if they’re not available until after my office hours, I will have a phone session or a FaceTime session.

The hardest part about being a psychiatrist is seeing someone not be able to afford the help that they need. That’s why three years ago, I partnered with Zach’s company and a few of our friends’ companies to create a private foundation with the intent to help individuals receive mental health treatment who otherwise would not be able to afford it. Sometimes I see 8 clients a week who would never step foot inside of my office without their session being covered 100%. Thisis the reason I work. Penny is my world, but she is just part of the equation. When people ask me why I still work when Zach makes almost 5x my salary, I start to boil inside.

I’d like to see these people tell my 10 year old client who lost her dad to suicide that her grief and apperception are not worth mending. Or tell the husband who was abused physically and sexually by his father during his adolescent years that his trauma shouldn’t seep over into his marriage. Mental health will sail this world or sink it, and I can’t help but to think it’s set up for sinking.

I heard a tap on my office door and smiled when I saw that it was my mom.

“Hey Snooks,” Snooks has been my mom’s nickname for me since I was a little girl, “Zach said he’s trying to get a hold of you. I told him you’re preparing for your 1pm and will call when you get the chance.”

“Thanks, mom.”

Sometimes I get so consumed in my work that I forget to check my phone, but Zach and Sarah know to call the office line if it’s an emergency, so I never get too worried about missing something.

I dialed Zach’s number and listened to a few rings before hearing his deep, buttery voice.

“Hey beautiful, busy today?”

“Yeah, it’s one of those days. I have a few minutes before my 1pm, what do you need?”

“I need a favor, and if you can’t do it then I’ll ask Sarah. Can you drop by Nordstrom’s on your way home and pick up a shirt I ordered for tonight? I have to stay later than I thought, and I won’t have time to pick it up before the New Year’s Masquerade tonight.”

“Yeah, I’ll do that.”

“Did you get yourself a dress already?”

“Mmmhm. A few weeks ago.”

“I had a shirt a few weeks ago until...it shrunk...somehow...in the wash.”

“Interesting. You sure it has nothing to do with that yummy belly you’ve got going on? I can’t wait to sink my hands into it later.”

“Mmm, baby, better watch yourself.”

“Thanks for the advice, but after thinking about it, I’m gonna have to pass. I’d much rather live on the edge. Gotta go, I just heard Diane greet my client.”

“Okay, I love you, babes.”

“Love you, bye.”

My 1pm session is my last of the day, and right now, it’s the hardest one for me to get through emotionally. A happy family was left in pieces after a loving husband and father took his life, leaving behind a very broken and confused 10 year old girl.

“Hey, Miss Addy. I have been looking forward to talking with you all week. But first, I wanna hear about that home run you hit at your tournament over the weekend! Your mom texted me, but I want to hear it from you. Don’t be modest, remember, there’s no such thing as bragging once you sit on this couch,” I bounced on it gently and leaned in a little closer, “Could you feel were gonna crush it right as the ball rolled off of the pitcher’s fingers?”

Abby smiled shyly with her crooked little teeth and rounded cheeks. She looked to the side for a brief second before telling me how great her hit was, how the sound of the softball making contact with the metal bat has played over and over in her head since the moment it happened, and how she slid into home plate not knowing if she was going to beat the ball going into the catcher’s mitt. She did, and now Abby can’t wait to do it again.

Abby doesn’t even know it, but she has influenced her therapist’s life, too.
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Sep 1, 2019
I finished up my paperwork and headed out the door at 3:15pm to pick up Zach’s shirt for the party. We lived in a sophisticated gated community that held a huge New Year’s Eve party every year. It was fun because instead of the party being at one location, people would set up parties inside of their homes for neighbors to “house hop” until 11:30pm, when we’d all gather and meet up inside of our neighborhood’s clubhouse. About 11 homes would set up their own individual house party, and each home inside of our community had a color coordinated map showing the location of the homes participating, along with what times they would be open. Once that house party ended, the homeowners would close up their house and join the rest of the “hoppers” to the next house party. Each house had a certain start and end time, that way people weren’t scattered at a bunch of houses at the same time. It was a great way to meet new people, although being married to Zach meant that we knew all the people.

When I got home, I picked little Penny up and hugged her tight. Sarah offered to stay while I got ready, but I missed my sweet giggly girl too much and needed her near me, even if I was just going to get ready for the night. Plus, everyone deserves a break now and then from mischievous little toddlers. Since me and Zach would be out late tonight, Sarah was going to stay in one of our guest rooms for the night so she wouldn’t have to drive home on roads where people could potentially be drinking and driving.

“Penny, I’m going to wash my body in the shower. Do you want to play with your puppets, or do you want to wash up with me?”


“Alright! Let’s get squeaky clean!”

I pinned my hair back into a bun and stepped into the shower with Penny. We have 3 shower heads inside of our large shower, two on each side and one sticking straight down in the middle. I typically only use the one on the left, or the one in the middle, but I turned on all three for the sake of Penny’s smile. She looked like a kid in a water park.

After washing my body and running a quick razor over my legs, I washed Penny’s hair and wrapped her body in a warm towel before slipping into my robe.

“Alright Penny, we have two lotions to choose from. We have a vanilla patchouli scent, or we have this lavender scented lotion.” She pointed to the vanilla patchouli.

“Perfect. Now come here’n let me put this on your sweet face before I brush your hair.”

Penny pointed to my legs with two exaggerated pokes.

“Oh, you want to put the lotion on my legs? Okay. Thanks helper!”

Penny rubbed the lotion very messily between her hands and applied it on my legs like it was the most important job in the world. It tickled so bad, but she looked very determined and happy to do her job.

“Haha, okay! Thanks helper! That’s good that’s good! It tickles! Let’s get you dressed.”

A few minutes later, Zach walked into the bathroom with a big smile, “Is my Penny girl all squeaky clean?! Here, let’s brush those pretty curls back into place. There we go.” Zach looked at me with appreciative eyes as I stood naked under my robe,

“Hello, Mrs. Davis.”

Zach stepped toward me and kissed my lips softly, “Looks like I arrived just in time to help you with your clothes.”

I saw something in the corner of my eye and looked over to see Penny putting eyeshadow on her cheeks.

“Penny...remember, I don’t mind sharing, but you need to ask mommy first.”

Penny pointed to my eyeshadow, “Thissss?”

“Yes, you can have some eyeshadow, but a much lighter color. And it goes right here on your eyes like this, not on your cheeks.”

Penny blinked really fast and looked at herself in the mirror.

“Perfect, it looks dashing. Now you and Daddy go find Mrs. Sarah. Zach, you need to get dressed so we can leave in 30 minutes.”

Zach picked Penny up and spoke as they walked out, “You heard the momma, Penny. She has spoken. It’s time to find Mrs. Sarah.”


Zach had his arm around my waist as we walked up the manicured lawn of the first house, Dr. Eric Dover’s home.

“Babe, you are an absolute smoke show, you know that? How did I get so lucky...”

“We’re still at the beginning stages of our marriage. You never know, I could turn out to be a real witch.” I tickled his belly and felt it’s heaviness jiggle underneath my fingers as he laughed and tried to get away. And when I knew he wasn’t expecting it, I popped the bottom side of his paunch, the juiciest part of his growth. “That’s some pretty good heft to your belly, there.”

Before we stepped into the front porch of Dr. Drover’s home, he turned to me and said real low, “I’ll show you heft, and you’ll beg for mercy while you’re stuck between my belly and the bed.”

“Mm, I hope so.”

I quickly smoothed my hands over my short black sequined dress. It was long sleeved, skin tight, and with a plunging neckline. I was sort of out of my comfort zone tonight with my outfit. Normally when I wear a tight and short dress, the neckline is high up to where no cleavage is showing. From the time I was old enough to understand the power of a woman’s sexuality, I have always chosen to play down my attire to where I wasn’t revealing everything all at once. I’ve always hated the stares and whispers of other women. And although men do look my way quite often, they hardly ever approach, which is great. I asked Zach at least 10 times before leaving the house if he was sure I wasn’t dressed in a “in your face” type of way. He assured me that I could wear a trash bag and women would still stare at me in the same way as they do when dressed to a 10. Last year, I saw many women wearing something similar to what I am now. But with just my luck, everyone else will be in no cleavage, no leg mode.

I pulled Zach's arm. “Zach, wait. Are you sure I don’t look like I’m trying to flaunt my body to others, and are you sure I don’t look like I’m a desperate woman in dire need of attention...”

Zach took a pause and faced me square on. To an onlooker, he might come across as irritated or upset, but I knew he wasn’t.

“Brooke, baby, listen to me. You are a beautiful and classy woman who is highly educated and smart as hell. If someone judges your demeanor by what you’re wearing, then they don’t deserve to know you. You light up a room by just being in it, and not everyone will see that light as a positive one. There’s nothing you can do to convince them otherwise, so just keep shining, baby. Don’t let someone’s cloud overshadow your shine.”

“Okay. I won’t.”

“Good.” And he kissed my forehead before opening the heavy front door.
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Sep 1, 2019
Inside Dr. Dover’s home, we were immediately welcomed with a cheer by our neighbors.

Thankfully, most of the other women were wearing dresses like my own. I gave a smile with a quick wave as I headed over toward the ladies. Zach threw his arms up in the air and shouted “Heeeeyyyyy!” as he jokingly strutted over toward the group of men, with his long arms still raised.

If you ever need a quick description of our personalities, well, there you have it. I would die of embarrassment if I had that many eyes on me at once. I almost hyperventilated at my wedding, and if it wasn’t for my veil, I would have surely died. And Zach would have to be taking his last breath of life if he ever made an entrance quietly.

As the night went on, and as more champagne slid down my throat, things that normally mattered, didn’t matter. The atmosphere was inclusive and refreshing, and I felt more than a little silly for my wardrobe freak out earlier. These women, who I have knows for years (!), had better things to do than bring other women down. In fact, I wouldn’t mind getting to know them on more of a personal level. I realized that I was the judgmental one, not them.

- - -

My eyes skimmed the sea of heads until I found Zach’s handsome face, and I spotted him almost immediately- near the kitchen, of course. He seemed to be eating more than his fair share of finger foods and pastries. Knowing that each house came decked out with food and alcohol, you would think that one would pace themselves, especially since there were 11 house parties to attend in total- but not Zach. When we started the night, Zach looked comfortably clothed in his new shirt. By house 5, his belly was looking more than a little full. I’d definitely seen worse on him, though.

I circled behind Zach and dragged my manicured nail on the fat of his sides before slowly tracing his belly hang to the front of his paunch.

“Baby, slow your roll with the appetizers, we still have 6 more houses to go and you’re going to pop if you continue at this pace. Especially since you’re drinking heavy beer.”

“Okay, okay.” Zach set his plate down and pulled me into his body with both hands by cupping the very top of my bottom. He leaned back against the counter and pulled me with him so that I was pushed into his belly.

His hands rubbed side to side where the fat of my butt reached my lower back. I knew he was tempted to go lower, but he respectively refrained due to circumstances. Without moving his head, Zach’s eyes quickly scanned left to right before patting just a tad lower than my back, making my butt jiggle loosely in my thong.

He kissed my jaw and whispered into my ear, “Have I ever told you how much I enjoy...this?” He patted again.

“I believe you have made that very clear over the years, Mr. Davis. Now stop with the soft porn PDA! I have to look these neighbors in the eyes after tonight, you know.”

“I can’t help myself, you sexy woman. First you take away my rights to food, and now you’re taking away my right to publicly devour you. What’s next?”

I smiled as I leaned up against Zach’s body again, wrapping my arms around the widest part of his belly so I could feel the roundness of his sides.

“Oh, goodness. That’s a very full belly right there. On second thought, eat up, Mr. Davis. We have a weigh-in to do tonight. Just don’t make yourself sick, because I have plans for this.” And I patted the side of his belly hard enough for it to wobble.

We made our way to the next house and Zach grabbed a fresh beer on his way out. One of the more outgoing men of the group patted his own belly in a loving manner and welcomed Zach into the chub club. Although “chub” was about 50 or 60 pounds ago.

“Man, how much you put on lately? Looks like you really enjoyed the holidays.”

Zach chuckled and downplayed the question, “Oh, I don’t know. I haven’t weighed myself in months. I’ve just been enjoying good food, good beer and good company.”

Zach’s response seemed to be enough for the guy, because there was no more mention of Zach’s weight. They moved on to talk about the classic car collection one of the older neighbors had in his custom built garage.

At the end of the night, I took in the small delicious details of Zach in his drunken and stuffed state, and damn he looked good. I could tell he was having trouble moving around as the space within the crowd got smaller, but that didn’t stop him from filling his mouth with more food. I watched as he brought the beer bottle to his waiting lips, but before contact was made, a fast hiccup slipped out of his mouth. Zach put a hand to the top of his belly and hiccuped again.

“Oh man....(hiccup) Brooke, I’m stuffed to the gills.”

Another hiccup, followed by a wince.

“Hold your breath.”

“Can’t. Too full.”

I pulled my phone out of my clutch to google ways to stop hiccups, and I was very amused by what I read.

Drink a glass of water quickly. That would for sure not feel good on his stuffed belly.

Inhale a large gulp of air and hold for 10-20 seconds. He doesn’t have any room to spare the extra gulp of air.

The last one was my favorite...

“It says to hold your knees.”

Zach glared at me with side eye and then we both laughed at the visual of him trying to hug his knees to his distended belly.

“I will give you Netflix dibs for an entire week if you sit your ass down right now on the clubhouse floor to try and hug your knees.”

“You’re supposed to love me and support me, not encourage me to look like a dipshit in front of our neighbors, who also happen to be respected professionals... But had you asked me 2 hours ago before I stuffed my face with 10 pounds of pizza bites, then you would be watching war documentaries for a whole fucking week, and without ONE complaint, right next to your husband.”

“Dipshit, that’s a good one. Adding it to my vocabulary.”

Out of no where, a booming voice over an intercom came from right behind us, making Zach bring a hand right up to his ear out of reflex.


Zach looked at me while still holding a large hand to his ear. “Sweet baby JESUS, that was louder than the time Penny found your car keys and blew the rape whistle right into my ear.”

I shrugged nonchalantly, “What, she just wanted you to wake up. Get closer to me so we can kiss when the clock hits midnight.”

Zach inched closer to me, and I was thankful for the extra height my stilettos gave me, because Zach’s belly was for sure a hindrance.



Cheers echoed around the room, and Zach’s lips inched closer to my face as I pulled him by the collar, “Come here and give your wife a kiss, big guy.”
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Sep 1, 2019
Zach unlocked our heavy wooden door and slowly creaked it open. The lights were off, minus a few lamps, which told us that Sarah was already asleep in one of the guest rooms upstairs. Zach went to set the alarm as I slid my heels off and walked very quickly to my bedside table to check Penny on the monitor. I immediately smiled upon seeing her: curls splayed over her sheets, her sweet little mouth hanging open slightly. I could almost hear the soothing breaths from her chest.

I looked behind me to see Zach walk in. He was halfway done unbuttoning his shirt, and his fingers looked massively chubby and long. “I’m going to take a quick shower, be right back.”

I closed our bedroom door as I heard the shower start up, and a thought occurred to me. Even though I already took a shower today, fondling my husbands big, wet belly in the shower is more of....a luxury than a necessity.

I could hear the water fall off of Zach’s big body in different rhythms as I slipped my dress and undergarments off. Goosebumps immediately rose to the surface of my pale skin as the cold bathroom swarmed my naked body. When I opened the door, Zach was already standing there facing me, and he wore that same sexy smirk I’ve loved since the day we met.

“Well, well, well. I guess today is my lucky day, huh?”

“Perhaps.” I pumped the soap into my hands and lathered bubbles between them before smacking the sides of Zach’s full gut. It was so full that it hardly had a give to it. With the last couple of weeks, his weight had brought more of a heavier underbelly, causing it to sag and wobble as he walked. Not much, but just enough to get my panties wet.

“Perhaps? A woman doesn’t come around this part of town unless she wants something. You must want something. Hmm?”

Zach walked toward me as he spoke, his cheeks were flushed with the heat of the steam. Water slid off the side of his fattened face, and I had to compose myself as his tongue licked and kissed my neck with heaviness.

He pulled me toward the built in stone bench on the back wall of our shower, sitting down heavily as he pulled me between his thick thighs. He hungrily kissed my ribs and belly as his large hands ran up and down the back of my legs. Each time he reached the bottom of my cheeks, he’d lift them up with his forefinger and thumb before squeezing the flesh underneath my ass.

Zach reached his long finger inside of my womanhood and rested the side of his face onto my belly, listening to the soft sounds leaving my throat. He ran his nose over my belly softly before reaching over to turn the golden bronze lever of the shower all the way to the left.

Zach hefted himself to his feet and reached down to feel his hardness. After giving himself a few strokes, he moaned in desperation, “I can’t take it anymore.”

He grabbed my cotton robe and wrapped it around my wet shoulders for warmth, and just so I could know what I was working with, I reached underneath his belly and between his legs while giving him my naughtiest smile. A sound of hunger growled in Zach’s throat as he pushed me toward the bed.

A little squeal came out as Zach held his big belly up so he could enter me, and immediately, warm waves of euphoria came over my body as Zach thrusted with a hot passion. Each time a satisfactory grunt left his throat, I became that much closer to orgasm. My face would scrunch and my eyes would roll, because it was a constant reminder of how good I made my sexy fat man feel.

His filled up belly felt like a thick bag of liquid as he moved on top of me, and as I reached my hands down to squeeze a generous handful of squishy underbelly, I lost all control of myself and orgasmed. Zach’s breathing became quicker and heavier, and I couldn’t tell if it was from physical activity, or if it was because he was about to come inside of me. The reality of the unknown raised something inside the depths of my arousal, and I reared my hand back and smacked the side of Zach’s belly in one hard thump. It sounded like I had hit wet cement.

“Ffffuck, Baby, that was the hottest thing I’ve ever heard,” I hissed between my teeth.

Zach was gasping for air now. His face was pink and his eyes looked desperate, like he had an orgasm just waiting, on the verge of release, hindered by a body of exhaustion.

“Here, roll over, I’ll help.”

Zach fell hard onto his back and I quickly pushed his belly up to ground myself on top of his wide hips. I steadied my arms on his gut and wasted no time in quickly bobbing my ass up and down on top of him, because I knew he was desperate for that release. About 10 seconds later, Zach got his wish.

Afterward, Zach laid on his back like he had just finished sprinting the 400 relay race. His thick arms were over his head, his face flushed in a dark pink color, and his belly heaved up and down in a quick pace.

Zach inhaled and blurted in one quick breath, “Just give me a minute.”

I threw up my hands like a surrender, “Oh- hey, no, take your time, babe. You just work on getting your breathing back in order. Breathing means you’re living, even if it does sound like you’re holding on for your dear life right now. Don’t let me sitting here distract you from living.”

I tied my robe tightly around my body and treaded to the kitchen to fetch Zach a glass of water. As I walked by the small lamp on the counter, something caught my eye. It was a note left by Sarah telling us to sleep in and not worry about Penny- all would be taken care of. Sarah was truly one of a kind. Seriously, I question if she’s even real at times. She says she has nothing better to do, since her husband travels more days out of the month than he’s home, so I believe her. But, we thank our lucky stars every day for Sarah. She feels more like family than a nanny.

Zach seemed to have himself gathered by the time I got back with his water, because he was propped up by his arms, making his full belly look very round as it spilled onto his lap.

“Here, drink this.”


“Were you out of breath because of the physical activity it takes to have sex, or was it due to you being so full with the night’s indulgences?”

Zach gulped his water and wiped the back of his hand over his mouth, “Both, but mainly because I’m so stuffed that I couldn’t breathe in a full breath as my physical activity increased. Still, this was a wake up call that I really need to start walking and getting back into the routine of lifting again, because I can’t run out of steam during sex.”

“Agreed. I love the way you look, but if it gets in the way of our intimacy, then we are going to have a problem. For me, being intimate with you is more than having an orgasm. The connection I feel as we make love is deeper than anything I’ve ever felt, and I’m scared of losing that with you.”

I started to get emotional, which I hadn’t planned on, but it was true...I was terrified of Zach’s weight hindering what we’ve always had in the physical. I don’t want him gasping for air while I’m gasping during my orgasm.

Zach pulled me into his lap gently, “I hear your concerns, and I agree with you completely. I will not let that happen. Tomorrow, I will start walking and lifting. Okay?” He pushed my hair behind my ears and kissed me gently, bringing out a smile in me.


“So....you wanna find out how much I weigh?”

I clapped my hands quickly in giddy excitement, “YES!”

We headed to Zach’s walk in closet and watched the scale turn on with the tap of his big toe.


I shook my head yes and Zach stepped on the scale. “What does it say?”

“It says 304! Zachary! I cannot believe you reached 300! What a glutton.”

Zach rubbed his belly like he was the shit and smirked at me as he did it, “Well, baby, what can I say? I’m a man. We hunt, we kill things, we fight, we bang, and we eat.”

I smiled at the way he rubbed his belly and strutted his sexy self around while flexing.

“You are a dipshit.”

“And us men are definitely dipshits.”

As we snuggled quietly under our warm blankets, just an hour later, I paid close attention to the way Zach’s belly filled the curve of my back each time he exhaled. One thick arm cradled his head and the other draped over my torso. The warmth of his body felt comfortable, like it was my second skin, and our closeness made me smile. I thought he was sleeping, but then slowly and methodically, Zach gently pushed my shoulders down onto the sheets and lifted his big body on top of my own. Then, tenderly, he entered me and made love to me in the still of the night. I could hear his mouth on my skin, every quiet moan made and every turn of our tongues. Without even realizing what was about to happen, a single tear fell off the apple of my cheek. I was not sad; I was happy. I was whole, and I was pretty sure that I was pregnant.
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Sep 1, 2019
Chapter 14

I waited until the 2nd week of January to take a pregnancy test at work. The private bathroom was locked as I sat on a squeaky wooden chair in the corner, reminding myself to take deep breaths in and out. I had about a minute left before I could check the stick, and my heart thumped so hard that I could feel it behind my skin. The timer buzzed, and cautiously, I made my way to the sink. What if it was negative? What if it took six months to conceive? What happens if I never get pregnant? I stood there with a small shake in my legs and reminded myself that I couldn’t worry about things that haven’t happened yet. Jitters filled my belly as I squinted down at the flimsy stick on the counter to see how many pink lines showed up. And there were definitely two lines. Definitely.

A breathy laugh escaped from my parted lips and my eyes closed in relief. My heart still felt like it was going to burst out of my skin at any moment, but this time, it was from elation. My hands shaked as I rubbed them over my dainty belly.

There’s a baby in there.

- - -

I fastened the button on my dark jeans and tugged at the hem of my white shirt.

“Penny, oh! Good job with your jacket! I need you to put your shoes on next so we can leave shortly after daddy gets home.”

I ran a quick brush through my hair and touched up my make up before accepting my effort as good enough. After slipping my leather ankle boots on and covering my upper body with a chunky, oversized olive green cardigan, I was good to go. I’ll put my lipstick on in the car.

I had called Zach earlier in the afternoon to suggest that we go out for dinner and dessert at one of our favorite family restaurants, and he was sold after he heard dessert, of course.

As we headed to the kitchen, Zach walked out from the mud room and gave me a quick kiss before changing out of his work clothes, and few minutes later, we were on our way to the restaurant.

At the restaurant, I could hardly wait to spill the beans about my pregnancy to Zach. I wanted to get through dinner first, though. I dug into my chicken and avocado on pita bread and made a good dent in my sweet potato fries. I have never been a big eater. In fact, my parents used to joke that I was a bird, because I ate like a bird and, according to my mother, my nose reminded her of a small bird. My nose is petite with a smooth, skinny bridge, turning upward at the end so that my small nostrils show. She claims that’s the part that reminds her of a bird. She must feel really passionate about her opinion, because she refuses to change it.

I pressed my fingers a few inches below my breasts to feel a tightness I was not used to feeling. I did eat more than I normally would, but I didn’t feel like I pushed myself past my limit. I just ate until I felt satiated.

Zach caught my eye and smiled at me “Was it good, baby?”

“Mmhmmm. Very.”

“What are you getting for dessert? I’m thinking about the oreo cheesecake.”

“Warm fudge brownie with caramel sauce and vanilla ice cream, for sure.”

I shared my dessert with Penny and was stuffed to bursting by the end of it. I felt like I needed to stretch my tummy, but I knew if I did, my cropped shirt would rise above my jeans.

I decided I wasn’t going to tell Zach just yet, and I desperately needed coffee to help with my food induced sleepiness, so I suggested that we walk over to Barnes & Noble for coffee and some book browsing.

As we waited in line for our coffee, Zach came up behind me and rubbed the small pooch of my full upper belly with his large hands. It felt glorious, and I leaned my head back against his body. Later, as we browsed in the kids section with Penny, Zach again put his hands on my upper belly, but this time he let them drift toward my navel where he gently squeezed my belly.

His breath was warm on my neck as he whispered in my ear, “You’re pregnant, aren’t you.”

A teeth bearing smile turned up on my face, but I didn’t answer him.

“Why do you think that?” I was facing him now.

“Because, I know you. You have never required a big amount of food to fill up,” he laughed for a second before continuing, “You eat as much as Penny! But tonight you ate enough food for your belly to puff out a little bit. And I can just tell by the spark in your eyes that you’re keeping something from me.”

I lifted my eyebrows and shrugged with a smile.

“Brooke Davis, stop this game right now. Tell me!”

“Okay, okay! I’m pregnant. I found out today at work when I took a test. I’ve had a feeling for a few weeks now, and I couldn’t anticipate the answer any longer.”

Zach pulled me close in a tight embrace and kissed the top of my head before breathing into my hair, “I love you so much.”
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Sep 1, 2019
My thumb wriggled underneath the waist of my jeans to adjust how tightly they restricted my middle. There was a mad red line underneath where the waistband had sat.

Pregnancy is a weird thing to go through, and I’m finding out quickly that every pregnancy is different.

I had what one would call a “perfect pregnancy” with Penny. No morning sickness, I slept well, and I hardly had any cravings at all. Although, I would have killed for coconut flavored shaved ice and a huge green salad. But by the last month, I only craved water and ice. Not just any ice, oh no, it had to be pellet ice. I craved it so bad that Zach bought 2 bags a week. And I drank enough water to hold over an army.

I am 8 weeks into my 2nd pregnancy, and my body is very aware that it’s housing a baby this time around. I feel nauseous at even the smell of chicken, which is basically the only meat I eat... well, before 8 weeks ago. Now I crave, have to have, hamburgers or a nice juicy steak. If I think about it too much then I’ll make myself sick, because I have never been a fan of beef. Also weird, the thought of eating sugar makes my throat dry up, I just can’t eat it right now. Well, minus ooey gooey brownies, I can eat those. Oh and, minus chocolate frozen yogurt, but ONLY if I have fries to dip in it. Basically, just give me all the carbohydrates and all the fats and I will be good to go. Casseroles, lasagnas and cheesy pastas are well known in the Davis house these days.

And that’s probably why the number on my obstetrician’s scale flashed 12 pounds heavier than my normal weight. I admit that I was a little surprised, but I’m not worried. I have never been one to weigh myself, other than at doctor’s appointments over the years, and I don't plan to. I’ve always relied on how my body feels and how my clothes fit. Although, with pregnancy, gaging your weight by how your clothes fit gets a little tricky.

With Penny, I didn’t noticeably show until almost 20 weeks. Up until that point, I basically just looked bloated in my tummy area. After 20 weeks, besides my obvious belly, the other parts of my body stayed the same until toward the end when my weight began to show a little.

So, I promised my doctor that I’d watch what I ate, since 12 pounds is sort of a lot, especially for someone of my size. And she didn’t fail to mention how I only gained 40 pounds with Penny. When I gave birth, by the time I walked out of the hospital, I’d lost 13 of those pounds. Then another 15 the next month, and another 7 pounds between then and Penny’s first birthday. The last 5 pounds stuck to my frame, but they did no harm. Like I said, I’m not too worried about it.

When I opened the garage door, I saw Zach’s car, which caught me off guard because it was only 4pm on a Thursday. I gathered my things and headed inside with a nervous feeling in my gut.

“Zach?” Everything was quiet, so I quickly made my way toward the front of the house, “Zach?!” I checked our bedroom and peaked in the office and then stood holding my breath at the bottom of our staircase to listen for any noises upstairs.

“ZACH!!!!!!!” Just then, I heard loud giggles coming from outside. I jogged toward the back of the house again and looked out the windows of our living room. Zach and Penny were playing in her playhouse in the courtyard. A hand went to my chest and I became overwhelmed with a feeling of relief, and then I felt silly. I don’t know why I’ve been anxious over stupid things lately. Actually, yes I do. That’s another thing I’ve noticed with this pregnancy; I get emotional easily and I’ve been overreacting. Hormones.

I put my hands in the pockets of my pea coat and went to join them. Zach’s eyes lit up when he saw me walk outside. Here lately, his face has reminded me of those heart-eyed cartoon characters in love.

“Hey, beautiful.”

“Hi. Uh, why are you home? Did Sarah have an emergency?”

Zach walked closer to me as he spoke, “No, I left work early and took tomorrow off for Valentine’s Day, but that’s not what this is about. We have a very special date to celebrate this week, and I wanted to take you somewhere nice this weekend to celebrate.”

I smiled big, “7 years together, can you believe it?”

“Best 7 years of my life.” Zach kissed me slowly before Penny butt in by hugging both of our legs.

“Up pease!!!!”

Zach lifted Penny up and continued on explaining the plan, “We can do whatever you want tonight after Penny goes to bed, and then tomorrow evening I’m taking you somewhere for a nice dinner,”


“For a nice steak dinner, and afterwards, we can go off to our hotel and express our love for each other through...actions.”

“Ohh, that sounds divine.”

Zach reached toward my ass with his free hand and tried to squeeze it, but my jeans were so tight that there wasn’t any give to the thick denim. He didn’t say a thing about it, but it was obvious he noticed.

“What’s for dinner tonight?”

“Whatever you want, baby.”

And he spanked my packed-in-denim ass as we all walked back inside the house for warmth.
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Sep 1, 2019
I left Penny’s door cracked open as I tip toed away from her bedroom. One of my favorite things lately has been watching Penny play in her play room. The way her face scrunches as she’s solving a problem, or how she points at pictures in a book and babbles about them to her teddy. I love how she takes a deep breath and says “mama” in her precious sing-song voice, and how she blows me kisses when I say that I love her. I treasure it all, I don’t know how I got to be so lucky. I really don’t.

I headed toward my bedroom to change into something more comfortable, and as I walked past the vanity in my bathroom, I stopped to study my reflection in the mirror. My hands skimmed over the extra pounds on my body, which seemed to gather around my tummy, love handles, hips and butt. A tickle in my tummy caused me to shiver, as if I needed to get rid of electricity inside of my body.

If I’m being honest- which I always try to be- I think I look really good. I feel womanly and sexy. I’ve never dieted or tried to obey society’s standards. I’ve always just allowed my body to tell me what it needed, just as my mom taught me to. She instilled in my mind as a young girl that I am in control of my body, and only I know what it needs. I’ve trusted that for 30 years now, and I plan to continue on with it. I’m not filling my body with junk, I’m just eating what it’s telling me I need, while also incorporating vegetables and fruit into my daily intake. Of course I’m going to gain weight when I add extra carbs and fats to my diet when my body has been used to a certain intake for so long. If I’m hungry, I’m going to eat. So, fuck anyone who says I need to watch my weight. What’s even more concerning is that my obstetrician never asked if I’ve ever had a history of body issues or eating disorders before making that ignorant comment about watching what I eat.

What if I had been starving myself? Or what if I made myself throw up every single day, but then after learning I was pregnant, decided I was going to treat my body right by eating. What if those 12 pounds were the result of that? What if she spoke to a woman going through body issues? I bet that happens every single day. If extra weight on a woman is so detrimental for a baby, then how detrimental is it for a woman to withhold the proper nutrients from her baby due to a shitty comment made about her weight gain? Now I’m mad. This will be addressed if it happens again. Don’t mess with a woman’s fragility as she’s sacrificing her body to grow another HUMAN inside of HERflippingSELF.

I pulled spandex shorts on over my butt and hips and picked out a long sleeved white shirt to wear. Over the weeks, I discovered that my limbs needed to compromise with each other temperature-wise. As long as my legs were free of fabric, then I was good to go, because hot flashes suck.

Zach was waiting for me in the kitchen, and boy did he look pleased when he saw me in spandex.

“The pizza just got here, are you hungry?”


We ate our pizza on the couch in silence as we watched a murder documentary. We love murder documentaries- me and the baby, that is. Zach was just along for the ride, and he wasn’t watching the documentary at all.

I took a bite of my pizza and didn’t break contact with the TV as I spoke,

“Are you having trouble finding the television?”

“Why would I watch the TV when I have beautiful Brooke to watch?”


“Well, you’re missing out on the documentary. You gotta watch- did he murder her, did he not murder her? You’ll never know because you’re too busy-”

“Watching you murder that pizza.”

Touché again.


Zach chuckled at himself, “Babe, you are so sexy, I’m sorry that I can’t keep my eyes off of you. I’m not even trying to be corny. I’m serious, you are incredibly attractive and every part of me is amazed by you right now. You have my baby in your belly, and I’m just awestruck by you. I can’t help it, I’m sorry. I’ll look away.”


He didn’t look at me this time, “Yeah?”


“What is it?”

“You can look at me, I’m sorry.”

Zach turned his head to look at me, and his face looked meaningful as his eyes scanned over my body, “You are beautiful. I just want you to never forget that.”

I smiled kindly at my husband as I crawled onto his lap, “I won’t. And thank you.”
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