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squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
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749
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UNF Jacksonville, FL
Omg I love mukbangs! Believe it or not, I often watch them for the relaxing ASMR effect more than anything else.
Yeah, as a foodie and feederism fan who experiences ASMR, I have to say I enjoy mukbangs on multiple levels lol, which aspect I'm enjoying most depending on the individual case. Mouth sounds definitely trigger the brain tingles but on the other hand watching someone totally lose themselves in the pleasures of eating and having foodgasms, well, that's another kind of tingles! :p
 

squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
Messages
749
Location
UNF Jacksonville, FL
So I haven't updated y'all on my health stuff since the little snippet in my video. I had been worried about possibly getting told my blood sugar was too high but that was good, as was my other blood work. Except the doctor said my TSH level was one of the highest he's ever seen. 😯 So we're definitely going to have to up my thyroid medicine dose, probably a few times over the next few weeks.

I also got 2 new prescriptions just now that I'll be starting tomorrow morning. One is Baclofen for my cerebral palsy spasticity which will hopefully improve my pain and range of motion.

The doctor also confirmed a diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder and we discussed a few different possible medications but ultimately the one he decided to try with me is Duloxetine (Cymbalta), nearest I can figure is probably because I have a lot of muscle pain and it's supposed to help that as well as the mood.
 

Shh! Don’t tell!

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May 5, 2018
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267
So I haven't updated y'all on my health stuff since the little snippet in my video. I had been worried about possibly getting told my blood sugar was too high but that was good, as was my other blood work. Except the doctor said my TSH level was one of the highest he's ever seen. 😯 So we're definitely going to have to up my thyroid medicine dose, probably a few times over the next few weeks.

I also got 2 new prescriptions just now that I'll be starting tomorrow morning. One is Baclofen for my cerebral palsy spasticity which will hopefully improve my pain and range of motion.

The doctor also confirmed a diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder and we discussed a few different possible medications but ultimately the one he decided to try with me is Duloxetine (Cymbalta), nearest I can figure is probably because I have a lot of muscle pain and it's supposed to help that as well as the mood.
Are you an anti-depressant virgin? Never took them before?
 

Shh! Don’t tell!

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May 5, 2018
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267
Yup, any advice for my first time? 😊
Not really because I took a different kind for a different reason. I took SSRIs for OCD and got off them because they made me tired and forgetful, and also decreased my sex drive. For me the cure was worse then the disease, but it’s different for each person and I wouldn’t presume to know your situation. Good luck, I hope they’re helpful for you.
 

squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
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UNF Jacksonville, FL
Well, I figured trying 2 new medications at once was probably a mistake and sure enough I got terribly sick and I'm not sure which medicine did it. I suspect it was the Baclofen, since I actually had increased spasticity which can happen, it backfires for some people. I was also throwing up and feeling very weak and hot, although the thermometer said I didn't have a fever.

I went to the hospital again Friday evening and they couldn't find anything wrong other than I was really dehydrated. I kind of wanted them to keep me till I felt stronger but they did send me home that night. I've been mostly in bed since then and barely eating anything.

They gave me some nausea medicine which is helping but I still feel really weak and it's kind of scary because mom isn't feeling well either and we're kind of struggling trying to take care of each other. I'm hoping if I can start eating again I can get some strength back.

And then I'm going to try the Cymbalta again because I really need some help with the depression, with everything that's been going on I'm having a really tough time dealing. The doctor said I might tolerate it better if I take it at night so I'll be asleep if any side effects come up.
 

squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
Messages
749
Location
UNF Jacksonville, FL
So I've been taking the Cymbalta for about 3 months now. I had 1 really good day but other than that it doesn't seem to be helping even though they upped my dose 3 times.

It's hard to tell though what is just a normal reaction to all the stuff going on in the world and in my life right now vs what's actually mental illness symptoms. It doesn't help either that my mom doesn't understand depression or even believe it's a real thing. So instead of trying to help and comfort me she just makes me feel worse about everything especially myself.

I'm calling my doctor on Monday to get my medication changed. But I'm not feeling really hopeful about it and honestly think I'm going to end up having to go to a mental hospital, which will totally freak mom out.

Anyway if it's ok to do here I'm putting a link to the GoFundMe page I set up for mine and my mom's medical needs. I tried to put it in my signature but I can't figure out how to make it show up.

 

squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
Messages
749
Location
UNF Jacksonville, FL
Yet another loooong overdue update. I took a bad fall about a month ago and got pretty banged up. Went to the hospital and got checked out, no broken bones thankfully although when they cat scanned my back they found I have some spinal compressions that are probably contributing to my back pain. Since then I've been bedridden because I was dizzy (dehydrated which was probably what caused the fall in the first place) and having a lot of pain initially and now I'm better but still need to build my strength back up.

After my doctor saw my back scan he put me on Gabapentin and it's been great, much less pain plus I'm sleeping better and even my spasticity is improved. Also since Cymbalta wasn't really helping me the doctor switched me to Effexor. Been taking it for 2 weeks now and I think we might have found the right med this time since I've been coping pretty well in spite of the hot mess my life has become as of late.

Which brings me to the other major recent happening, yesterday I found out my PayPal account got hacked and they cleaned out my bank account. So I've been talking to PayPal and my bank to try to sort it out but meanwhile I'm scrambling to figure out how to get the rent and other bills paid.

I'm taking 2 online classes this Fall and will have some leftover financial aid money from that coming to me at the end of the month, but not sure how I'll cover my expenses until then. Been looking for loans but they are hard to get with a short credit history.

To end on a more positive note, I'm going next week to get my id card made so I can get in-state tuition next year. With my mobility challenges finding transportation and arranging to get me somewhere is like planning a military operation so I'm very pleased that I was able to get it worked out. Since they're going to take my picture I need to do something about the matted mess my hair has become from a month of being stuck in bed plus uncountable months of depression self-neglect, but I'm working on it. At first I thought I'd just have to have it all cut off super short, but with a ton of patience I'm slowly getting it detangled.
 

Tad

Dimensions' loiterer
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
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The great white north, eh?
Oh wow, what a gauntlet life has thrown at you lately. Glad that you've come out the other end still fighting on.

Our cat has been on gabapentin for years (she has a degenerating hock). We have to mix it in with her food, however. I presume you take it more easily than that! 🙃

Good luck with your hair, the bank/paypal, bills, and not least, your hair!
 

squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
Messages
749
Location
UNF Jacksonville, FL
Sheesh, is it STILL August?! This is always a long month but especially this year. Paypal gave my money back but my bank locked my account and they said I can't get my money out until I actually physically go to the bank to confirm my identity. So I'm planning to do that asap.

The arrangement I had worked out to get my id card made fell through at the last minute but I did manage to get my voter registration card and that plus my rental lease and a testimony from my mother should do the trick and get me in-state tuition next year.

I've slacked off on my hair but I still need to get it done especially since I need to go to my bank and I do still plan to get my id card changed just to solidify my Floridian status and officially cut ties with SC.

I have a new personal caregiver who is very good (her daughter has CP so she is familiar with it) and next month when we get money she is going to take our lift van to get tags and stuff so it's legal to drive it. Then she can drive me to get my stuff done.

On the health front, I'm sitting up longer and longer now which is good. I do think the new meds are helping my depression, since I've only mildly freaked out about everything and I don't feel so hopeless as I did. I do have some leg, back and neck pain still but we're working on that too. I've got a mouthful of cavities (too depressed to care about oral hygiene plus a sugar addiction is a bad combination) that are starting to hurt especially at night when I'm trying to sleep but I've finally got dental insurance so I'm going to have some dental work done as soon as the van is running and the covid settles down a bit.
 
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squeezablysoft

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Nov 19, 2009
Messages
749
Location
UNF Jacksonville, FL
Oh and I started my online classes, Social Psychology and Drawing 1. I'm doing great in Social Psychology but I'm a little discouraged comparing my drawings to my classmates'. But then the fact that I don't really know how to draw well is kinda the point of my being in the class I guess, that's what I'm there to learn. Our first two projects were to draw a still life arrangement of 6 small objects we had around our house and to draw sketches of these 3 cups that the teacher showed us pictures of. And I'm procrastinating from our current assignments rn, which are drawing a value scale and doing shaded drawings of a sphere, a cone and a cylinder. These are my first two assignments, sorry for the suckiness.

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squeezablysoft

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 19, 2009
Messages
749
Location
UNF Jacksonville, FL
Just a quick update, I feel better than I have in a while but I think I still am going to have to see about upping my meds plus seeing a therapist again (I was seeing one online for about a year but I stopped for financial reasons). Also possibly tmi but I think I'm currently suffering from the dreaded antidepressant side effect of libido drop. I couldn't, erm, reach completion the last time I...let my fingers do the walking so to speak. Which is something I never had a problem with before. And I've barely even really wanted to try since I started taking the Effexor. So I know I'm gonna regret this, but if anybody thinks they can make my little man in the canoe stand up and rock the boat, my inbox is open, send me what you will. 🙃
 

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