What are you unhappy about today?

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Fuzzy

Just a dirty old man
Joined
Oct 2, 2005
Messages
9,988
Location
Utah
I tried to install DoorDash on my phone and all it really did is screw up my FB account's relationship with my cell number. *sulk*
 

Mel KM

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jun 19, 2020
Messages
60
Location
Dallas, Tx
I'm so sorry for you and all who knew your Dad, Mel. It is good that his suffering is done, but the loss doesn't feel any less for it. (my father died of cancer just about two years ago, and I know it is still affecting me. The first year in particular I felt really detached from the world. All the sensible words in the world didn't change those feelings).

Having to deal with his shop, in a strange city, at this time, on top of all that? Wow, what a tough situation. Best of luck on finding a straightforward solution that will let you move on as soon as possible.
Thank you. I’m sorry for your loss as well. It’s rough losing a parent.

Fortunately, everything is taken care of. My mom and sister finished with his estate, and my brothers and one of my cousins are running his shop, which is great because we really wanted to keep it in the family.
I’m finally headed home tomorrow, and honestly all I feel is relief. Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement :)
 
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MrSensible

Welcome to Moonside
Joined
Apr 15, 2012
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492
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,
To know that someone you loved and trusted could hurt you so deeply and suddenly and then carry on as if you never mattered to them at all. I don't think anything has ever made me feel so unhappy or bitter with the world.
 
Joined
Feb 15, 2021
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9
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nowhere
It's been a year as of yesterday that I haven't seen my Mom due to Covid-19. She turned 77 yesterday and lives in a nursing home. I read that visiting hours were supposed to resume soon but still no word yet.
 

Tad

Dimensions' loiterer
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
Messages
13,500
Location
The great white north, eh?
This isn't personal, but it is bugging me. The EU is currently blocking a shipment of 250 000 vaccine doses to Australia, from a European factory. The manufacturer is behind on planned deliveries to the EU because of production problems cutting into their volumes, and the EU decided to give themselves the power to block deliveries outside the block if in-block commitments are not being met. Mind you, this is not as bad as the US that is blocking any shipments of vaccine out of the country until they are done with their vaccinations.

OK, part of why I'm unhappy is personal -- I'm in Canada and our vaccinations are way behind the USA, UK, and a few other places, and part of the reason is this vaccine nationalism, and meanwhile my 83 years old mother still isn't vaccinated, and I don't expect to get a jab until at least July (and that is IF our shipments from European plants don't get blocked -- normally Canada would order vaccines from the huge plants in the US, but that wasn't possible this time).

What I'm really annoyed about, however, is long term economic stupidity of it all (it is going to drive a lot of inefficiences to cover political backsides) and how it normalizes the behavior of saying 'screw the rest of the world as long as we are taking care of our own.'

Of course I'm delighted whenever I hear that one of you has received your shots. If you are eligible, go get the jab! This isn't something that is not a personal behavior influenced thing, it is all national level politics.
 

Shotha

DM Supporter
Joined
May 16, 2011
Messages
1,202
Location
New Zealand
This isn't personal, but it is bugging me. The EU is currently blocking a shipment of 250 000 vaccine doses to Australia, from a European factory. The manufacturer is behind on planned deliveries to the EU because of production problems cutting into their volumes, and the EU decided to give themselves the power to block deliveries outside the block if in-block commitments are not being met. Mind you, this is not as bad as the US that is blocking any shipments of vaccine out of the country until they are done with their vaccinations.

OK, part of why I'm unhappy is personal -- I'm in Canada and our vaccinations are way behind the USA, UK, and a few other places, and part of the reason is this vaccine nationalism, and meanwhile my 83 years old mother still isn't vaccinated, and I don't expect to get a jab until at least July (and that is IF our shipments from European plants don't get blocked -- normally Canada would order vaccines from the huge plants in the US, but that wasn't possible this time).

What I'm really annoyed about, however, is long term economic stupidity of it all (it is going to drive a lot of inefficiences to cover political backsides) and how it normalizes the behavior of saying 'screw the rest of the world as long as we are taking care of our own.'

Of course I'm delighted whenever I hear that one of you has received your shots. If you are eligible, go get the jab! This isn't something that is not a personal behavior influenced thing, it is all national level politics.
Because we are aware that many politicians will prioritize their own regions over others, New Zealand has ordered four different vaccines, so as not to put all of it's eggs in one basket. The sad thing is that the world will be in the COVID-19 crisis until the majority of people in all regions are immunized.
 

DazzlingAnna

DM Supporter
Joined
Nov 2, 2019
Messages
1,133
Location
Germany
Because we are aware that many politicians will prioritize their own regions over others, New Zealand has ordered four different vaccines, so as not to put all of it's eggs in one basket. The sad thing is that the world will be in the COVID-19 crisis until the majority of people in all regions are immunized.
I think most countries ordered from different suppliers. At least those which can afford it.

As long as demand is not met by supply, protecting own needs will not change.
The attempt to think in terms of worldwide solutions here fails because of politicians who act for the people in the respective countries. On a small scale, the motto "every man for himself" rules, and nothing else happens on the political level.
I'm unhappy about that.
 

__tinyfox

Member
Joined
Feb 28, 2021
Messages
10
Location
Warsaw
I have a tendency to spill my guts and write too much. It was always my biggest problem when it came to exams. So I apologize in advance if this post is somewhat long-winded.

I haven't posted on this website before but I've been reading the fiction here for many years. It's the only place on the internet where I've found access to erotic fantasies which are in any way at least remotely similar to mine. I don't know where else I can write about what has been upsetting me recently without being greeted by either total bafflement or revulsion.

Since I was very young, I have been attracted exclusively to overweight men. My earliest memories of this fetish were when I was about five years old. I would obsessively draw pictures of fat men and of myself, a thin girl, standing next to them. Talking about fat guys and sketching these images would give me a rush of erotic pleasure akin to feeling drunk and disoriented. I became addicted to this feeling. At school and during my teenage years, I always had crushes on fat guys. They would always reject me without fail; not even solely romantically, but usually completely refusing to speak to me. I would sometimes date thinner men but in order to get any sexual pleasure, I would have to engage in elaborate fantasies about them eating more and gaining weight - not necessarily me feeding them or encouraging them, as my feelings towards that aspect of this fetish are simply neutral. This is the only way I could ever get any satisfaction. I was never overweight myself, but average, with a BMI of about 22-23. I have always felt extremely ashamed and disgusted with myself for being attracted to such people, largely due to the response of my mother/friends when they realized I only had crushes on fat men.

I have never been able to date a fat guy. Maybe slightly chubby/overweight, but definitely not with a BMI over 27 or a significant belly that is obvious even when wearing clothes. Recently, my therapist (who I see mainly due to this issue and the ensuing loneliness that I experience because of it) recommended that I should try online dating and only respond to or speak to the men whom I find attractive. I followed this advice and after about two weeks a guy that I'll call 'C' messaged me. He was from the East Coast of the US whereas I live in Europe. However, he was on an online dating site for people who are mainly looking for international relationships. We had a few really good conversations. I felt like he was the easiest person to speak to whom I had ever met. He was about 350 pounds and had the kind of body shape that I'm most attracted to, as well as a gorgeous smile. C was the first person who had the same kind of fetish as me and who said he loved feeling big, eating, and cooking. He kept telling me how hot I was and planning all the things I would cook for him or that we would make together. After a few really intimate conversations, he suddenly disappeared saying he had to go on a spontaneous trip for a few days and drive across many states to get there. After that, he didn't messsage me much. When I asked him what was up after about a week of this, he said he wasn't 'looking for a long-distance relationship' (even though I said I was free to travel, as I work remotely) and saying that he didn't mind at the beginning. He just suddenly lost all interest and said 'I am ending things. Have a nice life', then blocked me. It was the first time that I felt like I could be free with someone and not ashamed. It was the first time I didn't have to feel so f****** guilty all the time. I felt like it may finally be possible for me to be accepted by a fat guy. He got how I wanted to be thin and feel small compared to him while he crushed me. He understood how sexy it would be for me to rub his belly. I feel devastated about what happened, even though it was a few days ago. He made the obvious excuse 'well, you don't even know me, we've only been talking for a few days'. However, in the case of me feeling like I finally have this sense of acceptance, together with the hope that I could have this erotic connection with someone, means that we could have only been talking for an hour, and it would have broken me. It felt so raw to finally open up to someone who understands. This is especially bearing in mind that most fat guys have just rejected me from the outset. My friends helped me get over this, saying he was probably just a troll, and I have developed some perspective to make it possible for me to get on with my life, but inside it still feels like someone stabbed me in the solar plexus. That is what I'm unhappy about today.
 

Shotha

DM Supporter
Joined
May 16, 2011
Messages
1,202
Location
New Zealand
I think most countries ordered from different suppliers. At least those which can afford it.

As long as demand is not met by supply, protecting own needs will not change.
The attempt to think in terms of worldwide solutions here fails because of politicians who act for the people in the respective countries. On a small scale, the motto "every man for himself" rules, and nothing else happens on the political level.
I'm unhappy about that.
I'm unhappy about it, too. Unfortunately, this is how politicians behave, because they're driven by the fear of not being reelected.
 

Tad

Dimensions' loiterer
Joined
Sep 29, 2005
Messages
13,500
Location
The great white north, eh?
I think most countries ordered from different suppliers. At least those which can afford it.

As long as demand is not met by supply, protecting own needs will not change.
The attempt to think in terms of worldwide solutions here fails because of politicians who act for the people in the respective countries. On a small scale, the motto "every man for himself" rules, and nothing else happens on the political level.
I'm unhappy about that.
On the one hand if the vaccine production was government owned, sure they can decide where to send it. When it is private companies that happen to have their factories in one country instead of another, and politicians take advantage of that to claim the production for their country, that makes me unhappy. Economies of scale say that there should not be one factory in every country, but a few large plants where it is economical to keep them upgraded to the latest technology, but after this every country is certainly going to want their own plant :-/
(needless to say I'd be thinking about this less if Canada had its own vaccine production, but up until now it has always made sense to just buy from the American factories)
 

LeoGibson

Happy
Joined
May 22, 2011
Messages
3,499
Location
The Republic
To know that someone you loved and trusted could hurt you so deeply and suddenly and then carry on as if you never mattered to them at all. I don't think anything has ever made me feel so unhappy or bitter with the world.
Though it's hard to hear sometimes, maybe you dodged one hell of a bullet. For whatever reason people change rapidly and catch us off guard and that's really painful, but in the end you just have to ask yourself some questions.

Is someone who could treat me in such a manner that brings me this much devastation a person I would actually like to have in my life? Is that the type person that would be beneficial to my life and my circle or tribe? Is that the type of person that would help build something or would they drag it down?

You know the answers to these if you look inside. It's just a hard realization to come to. Best of luck and keep your head up!
 

MrSensible

Welcome to Moonside
Joined
Apr 15, 2012
Messages
492
Location
,
Though it's hard to hear sometimes, maybe you dodged one hell of a bullet. For whatever reason people change rapidly and catch us off guard and that's really painful, but in the end you just have to ask yourself some questions.

Is someone who could treat me in such a manner that brings me this much devastation a person I would actually like to have in my life? Is that the type person that would be beneficial to my life and my circle or tribe? Is that the type of person that would help build something or would they drag it down?

You know the answers to these if you look inside. It's just a hard realization to come to. Best of luck and keep your head up!
Thanks Leo. Looking at it from an overall, big picture perspective, I think you're right. Honestly, the damage to my perception of trust is probably the biggest loss. I've had issues trusting people for as long as I can remember (I'm not even sure why exactly, at least to such a degree). I figured I had developed a pretty good bullshit detector because of that, along with a sixth sense for spotting dishonesty and insincerity. This experience has shaken that belief and made me question my own judgement more than anything.

Here's hoping, if nothing else, I'll be able to learn something and take some value from the whole thing.
 

__tinyfox

Member
Joined
Feb 28, 2021
Messages
10
Location
Warsaw
I have a tendency to spill my guts and write too much. It was always my biggest problem when it came to exams. So I apologize in advance if this post is somewhat long-winded.

I haven't posted on this website before but I've been reading the fiction here for many years. It's the only place on the internet where I've found access to erotic fantasies which are in any way at least remotely similar to mine. I don't know where else I can write about what has been upsetting me recently without being greeted by either total bafflement or revulsion.

Since I was very young, I have been attracted exclusively to overweight men. My earliest memories of this fetish were when I was about five years old. I would obsessively draw pictures of fat men and of myself, a thin girl, standing next to them. Talking about fat guys and sketching these images would give me a rush of erotic pleasure akin to feeling drunk and disoriented. I became addicted to this feeling. At school and during my teenage years, I always had crushes on fat guys. They would always reject me without fail; not even solely romantically, but usually completely refusing to speak to me. I would sometimes date thinner men but in order to get any sexual pleasure, I would have to engage in elaborate fantasies about them eating more and gaining weight - not necessarily me feeding them or encouraging them, as my feelings towards that aspect of this fetish are simply neutral. This is the only way I could ever get any satisfaction. I was never overweight myself, but average, with a BMI of about 22-23. I have always felt extremely ashamed and disgusted with myself for being attracted to such people, largely due to the response of my mother/friends when they realized I only had crushes on fat men.

I have never been able to date a fat guy. Maybe slightly chubby/overweight, but definitely not with a BMI over 27 or a significant belly that is obvious even when wearing clothes. Recently, my therapist (who I see mainly due to this issue and the ensuing loneliness that I experience because of it) recommended that I should try online dating and only respond to or speak to the men whom I find attractive. I followed this advice and after about two weeks a guy that I'll call 'C' messaged me. He was from the East Coast of the US whereas I live in Europe. However, he was on an online dating site for people who are mainly looking for international relationships. We had a few really good conversations. I felt like he was the easiest person to speak to whom I had ever met. He was about 350 pounds and had the kind of body shape that I'm most attracted to, as well as a gorgeous smile. C was the first person who had the same kind of fetish as me and who said he loved feeling big, eating, and cooking. He kept telling me how hot I was and planning all the things I would cook for him or that we would make together. After a few really intimate conversations, he suddenly disappeared saying he had to go on a spontaneous trip for a few days and drive across many states to get there. After that, he didn't messsage me much. When I asked him what was up after about a week of this, he said he wasn't 'looking for a long-distance relationship' (even though I said I was free to travel, as I work remotely) and saying that he didn't mind at the beginning. He just suddenly lost all interest and said 'I am ending things. Have a nice life', then blocked me. It was the first time that I felt like I could be free with someone and not ashamed. It was the first time I didn't have to feel so f****** guilty all the time. I felt like it may finally be possible for me to be accepted by a fat guy. He got how I wanted to be thin and feel small compared to him while he crushed me. He understood how sexy it would be for me to rub his belly. I feel devastated about what happened, even though it was a few days ago. He made the obvious excuse 'well, you don't even know me, we've only been talking for a few days'. However, in the case of me feeling like I finally have this sense of acceptance, together with the hope that I could have this erotic connection with someone, means that we could have only been talking for an hour, and it would have broken me. It felt so raw to finally open up to someone who understands. This is especially bearing in mind that most fat guys have just rejected me from the outset. My friends helped me get over this, saying he was probably just a troll, and I have developed some perspective to make it possible for me to get on with my life, but inside it still feels like someone stabbed me in the solar plexus. That is what I'm unhappy about today.
 

fat hiker

Well-Known Member
Joined
Oct 25, 2005
Messages
1,626
Location
Ottawa, ON
On the one hand if the vaccine production was government owned, sure they can decide where to send it. When it is private companies that happen to have their factories in one country instead of another, and politicians take advantage of that to claim the production for their country, that makes me unhappy. Economies of scale say that there should not be one factory in every country, but a few large plants where it is economical to keep them upgraded to the latest technology, but after this every country is certainly going to want their own plant :-/
(needless to say I'd be thinking about this less if Canada had its own vaccine production, but up until now it has always made sense to just buy from the American factories)
Canada does produce vaccines, and a Canadian developed and manufactured vaccine is coming - the Medicago one - but it's not ready quite yet (it's one of the 100+ COVID vaccines still in development).

As Shotha notes, most countries have ordered from more than one supplier - he notes NZ has ordered from four suppliers, and Canada has ordered from SEVEN different manufacturers, including the Canadian company developing the Medicago vaccine.

There will be enough vaccines for all, if we just wear our masks, wash our hands and hold on for a bit...

What's more worrying to me than 'vaccine nationalism' is whether the current vaccines will be able to handle the new COVID variants that are evolving. The P1 seems especially good at evading the current vaccines. COVID vaccines may become like flu vaccines, something we should get every year.
 

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