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CAMellie

Gabriel Spencer
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Jul 4, 2007
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I'm sad that we were not able to get my hubby's cap and gown for his commencement ceremony to receive his AA. He'll still look handsome in his slacks, dress shirt, and tie...but I really wish we hadn't forgotten to put in the order for his cap and gown in time. :(
 

moore2me

Lions don't need to spank
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Banned from facebook,
I'm sad that we were not able to get my hubby's cap and gown for his commencement ceremony to receive his AA. He'll still look handsome in his slacks, dress shirt, and tie...but I really wish we hadn't forgotten to put in the order for his cap and gown in time. :(
CAMellie,
First let me say I am glad you are doing better healthwise and are back contributing to the Forums here.

I have some suggestions that you might want to try at the last minute (its worth a try).
1. Put an ad in Craig's list and ask for the loan, gift, or sale of a previous alumni's graduation cap & gown. It may not fit hubby exactly - but its worth a try.
2. Call the President, the Caplain, the Head of Recruitment, the Head of the Alumni Assn, and/or the Head of the Board of Directors of hubby's school and explain your plight to them and see if anyone can loan him a cap and/or gown.
3. If you hubby or his family are citizens of another country (Mexico for example) call that country's closest embassy in your state. As for the head of the embassy & explain your plight and see if they can pull some strings to obtain a cap and gown at the last minute for you. (Tell them how proud they should be of the model citizen your husband it trying to be and has become.)
4. Put and add in the student paper online today and see if someone will rent you their gown.
5. See if you can negotiate a person who is graduating an hour or two earlier or later to loan your their cap and gown just so he can use it temporarily. Offer them a fee if they need encouragement.

If I can come up with something better, I will post that too.
 

BigBeautifulMe

That was a heart.
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My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.

I'm going to miss him so much.

Tracy
I am so sorry, Tracy. :( Shadow is so lucky to have had such a wonderful life full of love with you. *Big hugs.*
 

Nenona

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Jul 18, 2009
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Depression.
It happens.
But the amount of racist, sexist, ableist bullshit I've been dealing with lately does not help.


It also doesn't help that I kind of need a change of pace/scenery from my crap parents and fawned-over sister who got knocked up because she didn't know how to use a condom.
Seriously, I get punished for my insomnia.
She gets rewarded for having sex with something like 30 guys and eventually managing to get pregnant via one. She already hates talking to the guy.
 

moore2me

Lions don't need to spank
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Banned from facebook,
Depression.
It happens.
But the amount of racist, sexist, ableist bullshit I've been dealing with lately does not help.

Dear Nenona, I usually do not critize other people's parents, but I thought some of my ideas about what you said would make you feel better . . . .

It also doesn't help that I kind of need a change of pace/scenery from my crap parents and fawned-over sister who got knocked up because she didn't know how to use a condom. I don't know how condoms work in your state, but in Arkansas, rubbers usually work better at preventing pregnancy if the male partner wears them. We generally expect the user (a male) to know how the rubber works (it's not that complicated) and to provide them. (The female usually has backup rubbers handy considering the severity of the penalty the woman has to bear if the birth control protection fails.) And yes, I know there are condoms for women, but how many of you DIMMERS have used these?

Seriously, I get punished for my insomnia. You have heard of Master Gardeners, haven't you? Well, Master Parents would do something like you are describing (not!). One of the best, surest, and fastest way to get any kid to nod off to a peaceful night's sleep is to punish them for not sleeping. Personally, I like the method used by Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest when she tied her little boy's hands and legs down to the bed before he went to sleep at night.

She gets rewarded for having sex with something like 30 guys and eventually managing to get pregnant via one. She already hates talking to the guy.
If you sister has had sex with about 30 guys, there is something not right with this chick. You should feel sorry for her and consider trying to help in some small way (and I understand you are the scapegoat for you family). But your sis is going down a dangerous road. Some things to consider:

1. Casting aside moral judgement, have that many different sex partners so early in life puts her at risk of sexually transmitted diseases which include herpes, papilloma virus & resultant cancers, hepatitis, HIV & AIDS, chlamydia, syphllis, gonorrhea, and veneral warts (to name a few). Some of these can also be transmitted to the fetus and some can cause birth defects. :mad:

2. It is possible your parents are enchanted with the prospect of having a grandchild. Since you mentioned that the mother has had multiple sex partners, it is also possible that the boy (man) she has named as the father is not the father. Tests of paternity will probably need to be done. Also keep in mind that the father (when determined) may want custody of the child. A young mother with 30 sex partners may have a difficult time in family court gaining sole custody. Such a homelife situation may also be a high risk of violence for the baby and for your sister.

Just a few things to keep in mind when dealing with your family unit.
:doh:
 
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My kitty (Shadow) is gone. My husband wanted some alone time with him to say goodbye tonight, and Shadow went peacefully while he was getting petted.

I'm going to miss him so much.

Tracy
I am so sorry about your Kitty Tracy he was very loved and I'm sure he felt that. (((HUGS)))
 

seavixen

Ditz Extraordinaire
Joined
Oct 5, 2005
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West coast, baby!
My sort-of-half sister had a discussion with my dad about his finances, etc., when she visited him. Apparently, he wants me to be his executor. I'm really uncomfortable with this whole line of thinking at this point.

It's very difficult to see him losing weight rapidly, looking small and frail, etc. He talked to her about how he ate much more when I was there to cook for him, and I feel awful that I can't be up there with him. My dad has never been any kind of helpless. Bossing him around feels weird and wrong, but has become necessary.

I'm so glad he'll be staying with his sister in California soon. I hate him being alone in Montana.
 

penguin

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I'm having an awful week. My dad's been in hospital for three or four weeks now, because of an infection in his shoulder muscle that's crept into his bones there. As a result of all the medicine and fluids, his kidney and heart aren't functioning properly. He's not in failure danger at this point, but he's 70 with a variety of health problems and it's just not good. My ex has also stopped paying child support (which I'm chasing up as much as I can through the correct channels), but I don't know when he'll start paying again. So I'm very broke, very desperately in need of clothes and to pay those bill things. With other stuff going on, I'm finding it hard to cope this week. I know it'll get better, I just hate wading through the shit to get there :(
 

Tad

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Jeez, things are all piling up on you, Penguin :( Best wishes for a breeze of good news to blow some of that mess out of your life, and soon!
 

Lamia

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I found out today that a childhood friend hung himself this morning. I hadn't talked to him in 30 years or so, but I've cried most of the day anyway. He was such a nice funny guy. That's two suicides in a week around here. I am from a small rural area. I didn't know the other guy, but I have friends who were good friend with both men. :(
 

penguin

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Jeez, things are all piling up on you, Penguin :( Best wishes for a breeze of good news to blow some of that mess out of your life, and soon!
My dad is doing better, thankfully. Turns out he's allergic to penicillin and that was causing an allergic reaction in his kidneys. His heart and liver are doing well and he's losing the fluid he'd been retaining. His kidneys aren't back to normal just yet, but they're doing better. The other stuff that's been bothering me isn't cleared up yet, but I know it'll get better eventually. I just have to keep on swimming.

I found out today that a childhood friend hung himself this morning. I hadn't talked to him in 30 years or so, but I've cried most of the day anyway. He was such a nice funny guy. That's two suicides in a week around here. I am from a small rural area. I didn't know the other guy, but I have friends who were good friend with both men. :(
I'm so sorry :(
 

CastingPearls

Go Big Or Go Home
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Penguin, I hope things let up soon and you get a break and I also hope that your dad is on the mend soon and there was no permanent damage. I'm severely allergic to penicillin myself.


Lamia, my deepest condolences. Hugs.
 

Lamia

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Thanks Penguin and Pearls. :)

I was looking at my grade school yearbook. There were ten kids in my class and ten kids in the class before me and behind me. Out of those 30 kids, 3 have hung themselves. Those odds are very unsettling.
 

WVMountainrear

Poster formerly known as lovelylady78
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My uncle's health has been declining for some time now. He's had two liver transplants and the disease he has continues to return. He and my aunt were at his local general practitioner's office a couple weeks ago when that doctor decided to tell them out of the blue that "Baltimore" wasn't telling them everything (my uncle's specialists are at John Hopkins). They made an appointment with his specialists to have a chat about some issues and to ask what in the world his general practitioner had been talking about. They learned on Friday that they only expect my uncle to have another two years at the most. This news has taken quite a toll on my family.

My mother didn't tell me until I called her on Monday. As soon as she answered the phone, I could tell something was wrong. Her biggest concern was my uncle's state of mind. Throughout the last 20 years that he's been having health problems, that's the one thing that has never waivered...he has remained one of he most positive people I know. And to hear that his spirit has suffered is the most concerning part for me too. I tried to encourage my mother that there's no expiration date printed on anyone, and the average length of time they told my uncle he would thrive when he received his first transplant was seven years. He made it almost 12 with that liver. So who's really to say? It's not something anyone really knows with any certainty- and the doctors told them that too...

Confronting your own mortality is difficult in itself...but I can understand why it's so much harder for him now. I remember when we were waiting for him to receive his first transplant...we were sitting around discussing the possibilities. There was a time doctors discussed perhaps having to transplant a piece of a healthy liver from a compatible living donor while we waited on a compatible full donor. I remember volunteering to see if I was compatible without hesitation knowing that I'd always been healthy, not much of a drinker (and I was much more "fit" then) and seeing him scoff at the idea that anyone else would potentially suffer (or even inconvenience themselves) just so he could live a little longer if it truly was his time. He ended up being called in for the transplant the next week. After his first transplant, he did incredibly well. He even volunteered at John Hopkins to counsel others who were on transplant lists about what to expect. He did things that no one imagined he would. Among them, he and my aunt had two children. :) They are now 9 and 4. He had always known he likely wouldn't see them graduate from high school...but I don't know that he thought seeing them get to middle school may not be a reality. And since they've come along, I know he'd do just about anything he can to live a little longer.

My grandfather has also not taken well to the news and has been complaining of feeling ill himself. I've spoken to my Mom on the phone every evening this week, and I don't think I've gotten her to laugh once. I do think I heard her smile one time this evening. So that's progress. I'm just trying my best to be as supportive as I can to everyone...to listen...to sympathize...to cheer when I can. Other than that, there's not much that any of us can do but push ahead and hope for the best. And take every bit of enjoyment we can from every minute we have left together, however short or long that time may be.
 

BigBeautifulMe

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Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about your uncle. That must be absolutely devastating. You, your uncle, and your family are all in my thoughts. *Hugs.*
 

Ho Ho Tai

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LovelyLady - I am repeating the rep message I sent to you as a reminder to myself that I promised some additional information to you. I hope to get that to you in a few days.

"The topic is universal. The reactions can be devastating. The presentation is beautiful. It deserves further distribution. I wil suggest some possibilities by PM when I get a chance."
 

Scorsese86

Likeable conservative
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Why is always everyone picking on me? Can't I live my life the way I want to live it?
Why is my ex acting like a total bitch all the time. She dumped me, and I am the one who should keep in touch? And the few times I actually want to talk with her, she completely ignores me? What the hell?

And dad: no. There's no way we're ever gonna have a relationship. You know you just end up hurting me. And you never cared for me or my brother, really. Suddenly you wake up and realize you're 55, and you have two adult sons? No, you did that five years ago. And ten years ago. Fool me once, etc. You never cared when we were kids, why should you care now that we're all grown-up?

More like a rant this time. It's probably just frustration because my birthday is coming up, and birthdays and New Year's Eve brings out a lot of thoughts.
 

Linda

Just Chillaxin.
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Why is always everyone picking on me? Can't I live my life the way I want to live it?
Why is my ex acting like a total bitch all the time. She dumped me, and I am the one who should keep in touch? And the few times I actually want to talk with her, she completely ignores me? What the hell?

And dad: no. There's no way we're ever gonna have a relationship. You know you just end up hurting me. And you never cared for me or my brother, really. Suddenly you wake up and realize you're 55, and you have two adult sons? No, you did that five years ago. And ten years ago. Fool me once, etc. You never cared when we were kids, why should you care now that we're all grown-up?

More like a rant this time. It's probably just frustration because my birthday is coming up, and birthdays and New Year's Eve brings out a lot of thoughts.
No words just tight hugs.
 

CastingPearls

Go Big Or Go Home
Joined
Apr 11, 2010
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Why is always everyone picking on me? Can't I live my life the way I want to live it?
Why is my ex acting like a total bitch all the time. She dumped me, and I am the one who should keep in touch? And the few times I actually want to talk with her, she completely ignores me? What the hell?

And dad: no. There's no way we're ever gonna have a relationship. You know you just end up hurting me. And you never cared for me or my brother, really. Suddenly you wake up and realize you're 55, and you have two adult sons? No, you did that five years ago. And ten years ago. Fool me once, etc. You never cared when we were kids, why should you care now that we're all grown-up?

More like a rant this time. It's probably just frustration because my birthday is coming up, and birthdays and New Year's Eve brings out a lot of thoughts.
Hugs, sweetheart. Big big hugs. You know we can always talk if you want to, Ivan.
 

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