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Rojodi

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Barnes and Noble sending me recommendations for me to purchase Michael Savage's new piece of twit non-fiction.
 

MsBrightside

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Heh, cicadas ARE the background noise of summer. They're not THAT bad! I remember when I was little, it seemed fun to find the little "shells" that they shed all over the place. Granted, not so fun if you accidentally happen upon a live bug. Those mother(sorry for tainting your post like this)fuckers are huge.
I still like finding cicada shells :)
We've got a number of weird bugs this year I don't recognize; long black beetles with a proboscis and red wings. Also some type slender green bug that looked like a cross between a grasshopper and a mantis that hopped/flew off my patio, to name a couple.
I have no idea what the weird red/black beetle was, but maybe the second one was a katydid (see below)?
Meanwhile in Texas fire ants are everywhere, a friend of mine killed a rattlesnake in her yard this past spring with her son's baseball bat, and someone in my neighborhood found a wild alligator, so things could be worse. We also have scorpions, a bunch of lizards, little green tree frogs that suction themselves to windows and siding, love bugs, and chiggers. Climate change or not, I'm sending them all your way. :D

Had a fight with a wasp on a train platform yesterday, and I do believe I may have looked a tiny bit mental to the people 30yards away as I punched and swore at what would have looked like fresh air.
I do hope you weren't stung. At least it's better to look a bit mental than actually to be a bit mental. Not that the two are necessarily mutually exclusive. ;)

I killed a wasp in my house this summer; and if anyone had been watching, I'm sure I would have appeared unhinged also. I sprayed it with Raid, only it wasn't the type designed for wasps, so I kept spraying until it basically drowned in the stuff. I try to live and let live when it comes to insects/arachnids outdoors, but if they come inside they must die!

View attachment katydid2.jpg
 

biglynch

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I still like finding cicada shells :)

I have no idea what the weird red/black beetle was, but maybe the second one was a katydid (see below)?
Meanwhile in Texas fire ants are everywhere, a friend of mine killed a rattlesnake in her yard this past spring with her son's baseball bat, and someone in my neighborhood found a wild alligator, so things could be worse. We also have scorpions, a bunch of lizards, little green tree frogs that suction themselves to windows and siding, love bugs, and chiggers. Climate change or not, I'm sending them all your way. :D


I do hope you weren't stung. At least it's better to look a bit mental than actually to be a bit mental. Not that the two are necessarily mutually exclusive. ;)

I killed a wasp in my house this summer; and if anyone had been watching, I'm sure I would have appeared unhinged also. I sprayed it with Raid, only it wasn't the type designed for wasps, so I kept spraying until it basically drowned in the stuff. I try to live and let live when it comes to insects/arachnids outdoors, but if they come inside they must die!

The bugs must die!
 

KHayes666

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I conducted a phone interview with ex-NBA star Kenny Anderson

I've gone back and forth in emails with pro wrestling legend Jim Cornette.

I've done emailed interviews with 2 minor league baseball radio announcers and 3 players.

I've fought with dozens of male and female members of the community, some of which were high up in the hierarchy.

I've dated some pretty famous paysite models (for this community anyway)

I write a monthly sports column for a printed publication and I write for a basketball website........

Yet I can't, for the life of me, bring myself to say hi to this girl I knew in high school that I haven't seen for 10 years. Back when I was just an immature, inexperienced 17 year old kid I had a crush on her and its never gone away. Not that I'm trying to get in her pants since I'm engaged, but I'm too chicken just to say hi out of the possibility of rejection. Why is it I don't give a damn if I get into a fight with a paysite model, can conduct anxiety free interviews with famous athletes but someone I haven't seen in 10 years gives me the willies?

What the heck?
 

Tad

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kevin: at a guess-- your 'relationship' with her hasn't progressed since you were a nervous 17 your old, so it pulls up that old anxiety (at a guess). Also, if she rejects you now it would also sort of be a post-hoc rejection of your 17 year old self, sealing off one of those 'would it have worked out?' daydreams in a brutal way.

I'd suggest spending a bit of time thinking about how you would want to interact with her now, as adults, and see if that helps you get out of that nervous mind-set. Good luck sorting it out, one way or another.
 

KHayes666

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kevin: at a guess-- your 'relationship' with her hasn't progressed since you were a nervous 17 your old, so it pulls up that old anxiety (at a guess). Also, if she rejects you now it would also sort of be a post-hoc rejection of your 17 year old self, sealing off one of those 'would it have worked out?' daydreams in a brutal way.

I'd suggest spending a bit of time thinking about how you would want to interact with her now, as adults, and see if that helps you get out of that nervous mind-set. Good luck sorting it out, one way or another.

How I'd interact with her now is "Hi how are ya, what's new?" Only problem is, she'd probably be like "what the f does HE want" given my past reputation.

Its more of I can carry an adult conversation but I'm not sure if she can. I grew up in yuppie town and I wasn't a yuppie, so not sure if those feelings ever go away. Some people mature, some don't.
 

MsBrightside

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I'm from Buenos Aires, and I say kill 'em all!
:cool:, a Starship Troopers/giant alien bug reference! (I confess I had to look it up--I'm so clueless that I really thought for a minute that you might be from Buenos Aires. :blush:)

To keep this post on topic, I'm mad that I wasted 1997 in the lab, when I could have been having fun and watching action-packed sci-fi movies.
 

tankyguy

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:cool:, a Starship Troopers/giant alien bug reference! (I confess I had to look it up--I'm so clueless that I really thought for a minute that you might be from Buenos Aires. :blush:)

Don't feel bad. A couple people also missed the reference and PMed me asking if I was really from there. Sadly no. Just a garden variety hoser.
:)


To keep this post on topic, I'm mad that I wasted 1997 in the lab, when I could have been having fun and watching action-packed sci-fi movies.

There's always Netflix! If you do go looking, stick with the first 'Troopers' movie. It's dumb fun and cheese, and Neil Patrick Harris fans will probably dig it, but the direct to video/DVD sequels are terrible.
 

Rojodi

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All these "Fantasy Football" messages I'm receiving on Yahoo, Twitter, and Facebook. God, I am NOT playing FF and will never!!
 

Librarygirl

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Friend at work is back to being dismissive and cold again and I really want to say something / call him out on it but don't know how without making things worse. This is the person who encouraged me to spend hours chatting and randomly sharing stuff and having a laugh last year. Now he is all abrupt and sometimes seems impatient even if I go to ask him about professional things. New low yesterday when I went to seek advice following complaints about my reading room service from academics (he is an academic and whilst not involved, knows these people). These complaints are mainly about things I don't have the power to change but I like to think our friendly service and willingness to help mitigate factors like short opening hours. He then tries to fob me off on a a load of other people (can't u ask x etc). Then says 'oh I've heard people talking about it, lots of people hate the reading room'. I don't think I'm over sensitive but even if this were true it seems a bit tactless. I mean, I wouldn't rock up and say 'loads of people hate your lectures / book'. This is someone who in the past has been kind and supportive to me and I was just taken aback. I have in equal measure always helped him out. Yes it is our closeness I miss too, but I just don't get how even stress and being busy can explain a complete personality change. He used to really value my work and made me feel I was doing a great job but now it's like he couldn't give a damn and I'm just good for a talk to a group/ but of book fetching when it suits.
 

CleverBomb

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All these "Fantasy Football" messages I'm receiving on Yahoo, Twitter, and Facebook. God, I am NOT playing FF and will never!!
And then the Handsome Prince dropped back in the pocket, went long, and the Beautiful Princess caught the ball in the end zone and landed in bounds, and they all lived happily ever after.

THE END.
 
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MsBrightside

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Friend at work is back to being dismissive and cold again and I really want to say something / call him out on it but don't know how without making things worse. This is the person who encouraged me to spend hours chatting and randomly sharing stuff and having a laugh last year. Now he is all abrupt and sometimes seems impatient even if I go to ask him about professional things. New low yesterday when I went to seek advice following complaints about my reading room service from academics (he is an academic and whilst not involved, knows these people). These complaints are mainly about things I don't have the power to change but I like to think our friendly service and willingness to help mitigate factors like short opening hours. He then tries to fob me off on a a load of other people (can't u ask x etc). Then says 'oh I've heard people talking about it, lots of people hate the reading room'. I don't think I'm over sensitive but even if this were true it seems a bit tactless. I mean, I wouldn't rock up and say 'loads of people hate your lectures / book'. This is someone who in the past has been kind and supportive to me and I was just taken aback. I have in equal measure always helped him out. Yes it is our closeness I miss too, but I just don't get how even stress and being busy can explain a complete personality change. He used to really value my work and made me feel I was doing a great job but now it's like he couldn't give a damn and I'm just good for a talk to a group/ but of book fetching when it suits.

Hi, Librarygirl. I've read some of your other posts about this person and am pretty much as bewildered as you are. Unless there has been some type of misunderstanding that you are not aware of, it's hard to comprehend how his attitude could change so completely. I am not trying to make a joke in poor taste but asking you seriously if he could be taking some kind of mood-altering medication for something like bipolar disorder? I don't have much experience with people struggling with this issue, except for a former colleague and an extended family member; but, from what I understand, the behavior of the affected people can be significantly different in their medicated and unmedicated states, and an unmedicated person affected by the disorder can go through positive and negative emotional cycles.

The only reason I bring this up is to suggest that the change in his demeanor toward you doesn't mean that you did anything wrong, or that you are any less lovely, sweet, and intelligent a person now than before. He obviously has his own issues to deal with; and, whatever they may be, they likely have nothing to do with any self-perceived missteps on your part.

I'm just sorry that you have been hurt as a result and hope that you can find your way clear to regain the closeness you once had or accept that things have changed irrevocably and look forward to the next chapter in your life. (Sorry for the book reference, Librarygirl, but it seemed fitting.) Hugs to you.
 

Ohio Lady

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All these "Fantasy Football" messages I'm receiving on Yahoo, Twitter, and Facebook. God, I am NOT playing FF and will never!!
I do not know about the other places but on Facebook you can block all games including Fantasy Football.. might wanna give it a try.
 

fat hiker

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Friend at work is back to being dismissive and cold again and I really want to say something / call him out on it but don't know how without making things worse. This is the person who encouraged me to spend hours chatting and randomly sharing stuff and having a laugh last year. Now he is all abrupt and sometimes seems impatient even if I go to ask him about professional things. New low yesterday when I went to seek advice following complaints about my reading room service from academics (he is an academic and whilst not involved, knows these people). (snipped)..

I want to chime in supporting Ms. Brightside's hypothesis - he sounds like a class bipolar case, or some other personality disorder. I worked for a bipolar man once, and this turn from engaged to absolutely cold sounds very familiar.

Which is all to say that, hard as it is to fathom, it's not your fault, and not your problem - though obviously it hurts.

Do try to find some support elsewhere on campus, and feel free to vent here further!
 

Rojodi

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I do not know about the other places but on Facebook you can block all games including Fantasy Football.. might wanna give it a try.

Facebook FF posts are blocked. I sent a few Twitter followers to stop direct messaging me about who to pick for their teams: I don't care about it.
 

Librarygirl

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Hi, Librarygirl. I've read some of your other posts about this person and am pretty much as bewildered as you are. Unless there has been some type of misunderstanding that you are not aware of, it's hard to comprehend how his attitude could change so completely. I am not trying to make a joke in poor taste but asking you seriously if he could be taking some kind of mood-altering medication for something like bipolar disorder? I don't have much experience with people struggling with this issue, except for a former colleague and an extended family member; but, from what I understand, the behavior of the affected people can be significantly different in their medicated and unmedicated states, and an unmedicated person affected by the disorder can go through positive and negative emotional cycles.

The only reason I bring this up is to suggest that the change in his demeanor toward you doesn't mean that you did anything wrong, or that you are any less lovely, sweet, and intelligent a person now than before. He obviously has his own issues to deal with; and, whatever they may be, they likely have nothing to do with any self-perceived missteps on your part.

I'm just sorry that you have been hurt as a result and hope that you can find your way clear to regain the closeness you once had or accept that things have changed irrevocably and look forward to the next chapter in your life. (Sorry for the book reference, Librarygirl, but it seemed fitting.) Hugs to you.

I want to chime in supporting Ms. Brightside's hypothesis - he sounds like a class bipolar case, or some other personality disorder. I worked for a bipolar man once, and this turn from engaged to absolutely cold sounds very familiar.

Which is all to say that, hard as it is to fathom, it's not your fault, and not your problem - though obviously it hurts.

Do try to find some support elsewhere on campus, and feel free to vent here further!

Thank you both so much for this. If it was just a case of 'he's not that into you', I'd walk away. But I've known this man for years and it is just so perplexing. Ironic that in my appraisal in January my boss commented on the excellent working relationship said friend and I have. I do think it goes beyond being busy as it isn't just that he can't chat and ignores less serious emails - it's actually getting so he isn't even being professionally that civil. I did wonder at first if he had just 'gone over to the dark side' and become a management person too self-important to be involved with someone on my level, but that would be massively out of character. And in between times he'll be all smiley or we will have the odd little chat like old times.

I'm not sure about bi-polar - it's not something I know much about, but I did wonder if it was that maybe he had some medical issue and stress about that / medication side effects were affecting him. It isn't just me, though I guess I'm more perceptive because of our past closeness - he generally isn't so cheery, talkative with anyone and others have noticed this. Another thought was that it is depression and maybe he just can't be bothered with anyone else's issues, is sometimes not able to put on an 'acting appearance'. It is very erratic and every so often it's like he is the 'old' him and sweet again. There's been a few times he's actually veered into saying something slightly mean, but I think the first couple of times I put it down to my own sensitivity following my head injury earlier in the year. I can see now it is more than that as even when he was talking to me on Friday, it was like he was really closed off and there was a coldness in his eyes that I've never seen before. He wasn't really reacting to some of the things i was saying. It's hard as most of the time when we talk it is just us - I wish someone could be a fly on the wall! I did wonder about asking one of his admin assistants if he is ok in a casual way as I know them quite well. Doesn't help that I had this bizarre and vivid dream out of the blue that he was crying and really upset and I was holding him.

I have a meeting with him on Tuesday and wonder whether to say anything about how Friday's conversation upset me / that what he said was pretty tactless and to explain that I miss how we used to chat and that if there is anything wrong, I'm there for him. It's getting so I'm nervous as it hurts so much to be greeted by this 'stranger' instead of the cheery, jokey, sweet man with big warm hugs.

Wittering over....Thank you so much for your kindness both of you.
 

Archetypus

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Thank you both so much for this. If it was just a case of 'he's not that into you', I'd walk away. But I've known this man for years and it is just so perplexing. Ironic that in my appraisal in January my boss commented on the excellent working relationship said friend and I have. I do think it goes beyond being busy as it isn't just that he can't chat and ignores less serious emails - it's actually getting so he isn't even being professionally that civil. I did wonder at first if he had just 'gone over to the dark side' and become a management person too self-important to be involved with someone on my level, but that would be massively out of character. And in between times he'll be all smiley or we will have the odd little chat like old times.

I'm not sure about bi-polar - it's not something I know much about, but I did wonder if it was that maybe he had some medical issue and stress about that / medication side effects were affecting him. It isn't just me, though I guess I'm more perceptive because of our past closeness - he generally isn't so cheery, talkative with anyone and others have noticed this. Another thought was that it is depression and maybe he just can't be bothered with anyone else's issues, is sometimes not able to put on an 'acting appearance'. It is very erratic and every so often it's like he is the 'old' him and sweet again. There's been a few times he's actually veered into saying something slightly mean, but I think the first couple of times I put it down to my own sensitivity following my head injury earlier in the year. I can see now it is more than that as even when he was talking to me on Friday, it was like he was really closed off and there was a coldness in his eyes that I've never seen before. He wasn't really reacting to some of the things i was saying. It's hard as most of the time when we talk it is just us - I wish someone could be a fly on the wall! I did wonder about asking one of his admin assistants if he is ok in a casual way as I know them quite well. Doesn't help that I had this bizarre and vivid dream out of the blue that he was crying and really upset and I was holding him.

I have a meeting with him on Tuesday and wonder whether to say anything about how Friday's conversation upset me / that what he said was pretty tactless and to explain that I miss how we used to chat and that if there is anything wrong, I'm there for him. It's getting so I'm nervous as it hurts so much to be greeted by this 'stranger' instead of the cheery, jokey, sweet man with big warm hugs.

Wittering over....Thank you so much for your kindness both of you.


You might just ask him? Since he is a Friend & all . . .

To be honest, if you're even half as clingy toward him in life as you are here, maybe he has noticed & is trying to avoid the Dreaded Talk while trying to spare your feelings. Maybe you should learn to take a hint.

One thing is for sure, the most effective thing you can & should do is disregard the advice of weirdos on the internet simply because they champion your paper thin diagnosis on the state of his mental health. As if.
 

biglynch

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You might just ask him? Since he is a Friend & all . . .

To be honest, if you're even half as clingy toward him in life as you are here, maybe he has noticed & is trying to avoid the Dreaded Talk while trying to spare your feelings. Maybe you should learn to take a hint.

One thing is for sure, the most effective thing you can & should do is disregard the advice of weirdos on the internet simply because they champion your paper thin diagnosis on the state of his mental health. As if.

To be honest you're a pointless poster who rarely if ever has anything but mean spirited things to say. If you believe the people on this forum to be weirdos then fuck off already. Nobody cares about your opinion. Where on the flip side librarygirl is actually a valued poster.
 

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