When did you realize what you liked, and what triggered it?

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jojoe

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Throughout my early, preteen life there were hints, but by the time I was 15, it was clear, I was addicted to big beautiful curves and that hasn't changed, in fact it's expanded past gender. I always want one more taste.
 

SSBHM

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Ok, I'm probably strange, but here's my story.

I remember when I was only like 4 or 5 pretending to be fat (not that I wasn't chubby), but I'd stuff a pillow or blanket under my shirt to have a huge belly.

In kindergarten I remember always liking the chubby girls. I told my mom about one girl that was the plumpest that I thought she was the prettiest girl of all.
 

Shotha

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I remember thinking that fat people were wonderful when I was 4 years old. I wanted to grow up to be a fat man. I would stuff pillows and cushions up my shirt.

Then puberty hit and every time that I was watching TV with my father and there was an attractive fat man on the screen, I had to put a cushion or magazine on my lap to hide what the fat man was doing to me.
 

jello4me

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First realized I was into heavy girls about 12 yrs old when my older female cousin came to live with us. She was about 18-19 and very chubby, with belly rolls. Always in a bikini summer time at the pool, very loose with guys. Fat soft belly and she constantly ate. Been an FA ever since.
 

Shotha

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As I've said before, I decided that I liked fat people and wanted to be a fat man, when I grew up, at the age of four. But there were two other stages in my development.

The second phase was hitting puberty and realizing that I was sexually attracted to fat men. I still thought that fat women were beautiful but it wasn't the same sort of beauty.

The third phase happened, when I went down town one Saturday morning and saw a handsome man with a huge, protuberant belly. That's how I wanted to be. For me the ideal man not only needs to be fat but most of it needs to be around the belly. This preference has stayed with me throughout my adult life but I still don't know why I have such a preference.
 

shadowcat

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There was also King Sized Homer. Countless nights, as a child, spent replaying that episode in my young mind. Thinking "What if a woman did that? That would be even better! No, no, thats crazy, gaining weight on purpose. Pssshh!" Then my curious mind started to wonder, how does it feel to be them? And more history....
So at the ages 4, 5, or 6 (still cloudy) it was Before pics of women in weight loss commercials, King Sized Homer, weight gain in cartoons (Animaniacs, Tiny Toons), and Hansel and Gretel in school that started it all. OH and some video game commercial where a guy in a resturaunt eats until he explodes.
 

alk27alk27

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It was slowly over the course of college that I realized. At first it was just me looking for skinny women with “bigger natural boobs” (never cared for the fake looking ones)
Over time i came to the natural conclusion the a females breasts can only get so big when they just weigh 110 pounds. So the women I searched for just kept getting fatter and fatter.

This developed from just a teenage horny preference for larger breasts to an actual legitimate attraction of fat women in general. What finally made me realize(I had many moments as I was in denial for a while, accept it, then go back into denial) was when I was with a mixed group of friends and we begin joking about who would make a great couple among us (we all had gf/bf’s to some degree but none where in our particular circle (see huge fucking nerds)) and we began talking about how this guy1 likes blonds so he’d probably go for girl 3, and girl 4 and guy 2 both like hiking, stuff like that.

Suddenly I’m broken out of my day dreaming of which of my platonic friends would most likely sleep with each other when one of my friends quipped that I’m always stearing at a really fat girl in one of our classes. I began to say something when they all joined in.:oops: I never felt so embarrassed as then(now I laugh like a mad man at how stupid I was about my own attractions). Although I never admitted it to them after that I became the butt of all jokes relating to fat girls.

I’m still in contact with most of them maybe I should send a photo shopped picture of me and a skinny girl and then one of her blown up to really lean into the joke. “Hay so I’ve been dating a girl for about 12 months, here’s some pictures.”

Edit- holy “he has a monologue issue” Batman!
To quote the new Witcher show “why is it when I’m around you all I say more in 5 minutes then I have in the past 5 months?”
 
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saturn70

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Since puberty, I was always attracted to bigger women, but due to societies twisted standards of beauty I was in denial for many years. The first time I made love to a BBW was an amazing experience, I was so much more into it, I was so turned on, the love making was more intense than anything I had experienced before. I realized it was because that was what I was attracted to, and BBW was my gold standard of beauty. It was a very liberating, and beautiful experience.
 

Salacious Caitlin

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Even as a little kid, I was always fascinated by stories where a character would get fat but also sort of disturbed and scared because fat was extremely taboo in my family (which probably just ended up making it even more attractive). I would secretly stare at pictures (mostly of women, because there just weren't many pin-ups or GIFs of fat men). Finally, I wrote my first fat character along with some erotica on the side featuring him (those are on tumblr, same username). Eventually, I realized a)I'm a FFA and b)The total biomass of people who are into this too is... substantial. For a long time I thought I was really strange and weird, love that dare not speak its name etc. Would never have figured it out without the good ol' Internet...
 

loopytheone

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Even as a little kid, I was always fascinated by stories where a character would get fat but also sort of disturbed and scared because fat was extremely taboo in my family (which probably just ended up making it even more attractive). I would secretly stare at pictures (mostly of women, because there just weren't many pin-ups or GIFs of fat men). Finally, I wrote my first fat character along with some erotica on the side featuring him (those are on tumblr, same username). Eventually, I realized a)I'm a FFA and b)The total biomass of people who are into this too is... substantial. For a long time I thought I was really strange and weird, love that dare not speak its name etc. Would never have figured it out without the good ol' Internet...
Gosh, hearing you talk about writing your first fat character takes me right back to when I was a teenager and doing the same thing! I know the thing that really got me into art and drawing was that I could sit and draw fat guys and admire them... I used to do a text based roleplay/story writing thing with a friend as well and I remember my first ever fat character being a part of that, but I was too nervous to ever mention that he was fat, heh. I still have a lot of love for that character, for being a gateway to me opening up to myself about what I liked.

Dims really helped me as a teen. To see that not only were there happy, fat women enjoying life, but there were all sorts of people like me who thought they were beautiful. I'll always stick around this place out of gratitude to that.
 

Build-A-BHM

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I was a FA for the longest time when I was younger and eventually found that I liked the idea of Women getting fatter. I remember having conversations with a few model friends back in the day who suggested that I'd look cute with a bit more weight or "what if the tables were turned". So, that planted a few seeds and eventually I started fantasizing about myself being fattened and now I'm more of a Feedee.
 

Corey

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Gosh, hearing you talk about writing your first fat character takes me right back to when I was a teenager and doing the same thing! I know the thing that really got me into art and drawing was that I could sit and draw fat guys and admire them... I used to do a text based roleplay/story writing thing with a friend as well and I remember my first ever fat character being a part of that, but I was too nervous to ever mention that he was fat, heh. I still have a lot of love for that character, for being a gateway to me opening up to myself about what I liked.

Dims really helped me as a teen. To see that not only were there happy, fat women enjoying life, but there were all sorts of people like me who thought they were beautiful. I'll always stick around this place out of gratitude to that.
Loopy and Salacious Caitlin, you guys make my younger self feel so much better. I thought I was a freak and completely un-normal as a kid, and actually up until about 5 years ago. I was obsessed with the idea of weight gain and fat, and since I was raised in a health conscious, athletic family, my obsession scared me into shame.

I never EVER wrote a fat related story down on paper because it would turn up into my older sister’s hands, who was a huge snoop. I once dedicated an entire notebook to my fat drawings, and then my sister and her friend found the notebook hidden under my bed. They mocked my detailed masterpiece drawings with their own dumb mediocre drawings on the remaining blank sheets of paper. It’s funny to me now, but I was so mortified then. After that, for my 10th birthday I asked for a white board so I could create my drawings on there and then erase the evidence. No paper evidence meant no dumb sister finding my artwork. But then one night I created a real good one and forgot to erase it, and guess who found it. 😂 Then about 5 years ago my husband’s new job prevented him from working out like he used to, and he began to develop love handles. He was a former gym junkie, and I was tired of him complaining all the time about his weight gain. One day after receiving another text complaining about his love handles, I decided I was going to only respond by sending an attached link with exercises on how to get rid of them. I innocently googled something and a plethora of weight gain stories showed up on my search and I almost passed out from hitting gold. So yeah, needless to say, I don’t feel weird anymore. At least not with the topic of weight gain and fat. I’m still weird in general. 🤷‍♀️ Like you ladies, I never would have known that others felt the same way I do. I literally grew up thinking I was the only one.
 

Jaycee

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I have been attracted to BHM/fat since as long as I can remember. Any TV shows/episodes/movies where there was fat character or a where a character would gain weight I was completely fascinated by and got a weird tingling feeling that my little 7 year old seld couldn't comprehend. As I got older (middle school years a little older) all my crushes were on the fat boys in my class, and I had fantasies of them gaining weight. My first boyfriend was a BHM and my second also a BHM (who I married). I'm glad I always knew I'm only attracted to BHMs. Now I'm working on being more confident about it and not confused or embarrassed by what I find attractive.
 

shadowcat

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Apr 22, 2018
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I never EVER wrote a fat related story down on paper because it would turn up into my older sister’s hands, who was a huge snoop. I once dedicated an entire notebook to my fat drawings, and then my sister and her friend found the notebook hidden under my bed. They mocked my detailed masterpiece drawings with their own dumb mediocre drawings on the remaining blank sheets of paper. It’s funny to me now, but I was so mortified then. After that, for my 10th birthday I asked for a white board so I could create my drawings on there and then erase the evidence. No paper evidence meant no dumb sister finding my artwork. But then one night I created a real good one and forgot to erase it, and guess who found it. 😂 Then about 5 years ago my husband’s new job prevented him from working out like he used to, and he began to develop love handles. He was a former gym junkie, and I was tired of him complaining all the time about his weight gain. One day after receiving another text complaining about his love handles, I decided I was going to only respond by sending an attached link with exercises on how to get rid of them. I innocently googled something and a plethora of weight gain stories showed up on my search and I almost passed out from hitting gold. So yeah, needless to say, I don’t feel weird anymore. At least not with the topic of weight gain and fat. I’m still weird in general. 🤷‍♀️ Like you ladies, I never would have known that others felt the same way I do. I literally grew up thinking I was the only one.
I once had a dedicated notebook in my teens too. I remember being cnfused about the way I felt. No internet and no name for it. My stories and padding were like an attempt for an outlet.. No one found it but I was forced to throw it out when I was almost caught. I became fearful when I lost a comic.. I think at school, Hope it was just casually thrown out.
 

Shotha

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I remember one awful moment in my younger years. I was obsessed with fat people. We had a lot of fat men in our family. I had made my mind up that I was going to grow up to be a fat man. There was one occasion, when my mother caught me padding. I must have been about four or five. She just dismissed it as child's play. The feeling of being the only one hadn't occurred to me yet. I used to think, "When I grow up, I'll marry a nice fat lady just like Mr. Allen has done." I didn't know about the gay thing yet. We had a family friend, whom I was encouraged to call Uncle Roy, even though he wasn't really an uncle. He was enormously fat. I remember him sitting in our living room with his big belly piled up in front of him. Needless to say, I thought the world of Uncle Roy. I was going to be like Uncle Roy, when I grew up. I thought that it was so cool that the other men called him "Fatty".

One Sunday morning, my mother had gone out, Dad was reading the Sunday papers in the living room and I was playing in the kitchen. Uncle Roy appeared at the back of the house and opened the porch door and walked through into the kitchen without knocking, as was his way.

"Eh up, Dad," I yelled, "Fatty's 'ere."

My father walked into the kitchen, obviously amused. Uncle Roy wasn't amused. He told my father, "If a lad of mine had said that, I would have given him a clip round the ear."

"It's just kid's talk," my father said in an attempt to console Uncle Roy.

My whole world fell apart. I had offended my beloved Uncle Roy. I was only old enough to notice that the other men called him Fatty but I wasn't old enough to realize that the never called him that, when he was there to hear it. To make matters worse, in this awful moment, I realized that fat people didn't necessarily like being fat, that people in general didn't approve of fat - except for me. I couldn't admit to anyone that I liked fat people. And, worst of all, if someone asked me what I wanted to be, when I grew up, I couldn't admit that I wanted to be a fat man. I would have to lie and tell people that I wanted to be a scientist or a doctor or something. As for wanting to marry a fat lady, being gay was the end of that.
 
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