Abduction - by Irish Bard (Alien Kidnapping)

Discussion in 'Fantasy/Science Fiction Archive' started by IrishBard, Apr 1, 2008.

  1. Apr 1, 2008 #1

    IrishBard

    IrishBard

    IrishBard

    womble/leprechaun hybrid!

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    Alien Kidnapping - A college girl is captured by aliens for their big breeding program.

    [Author's Note: I like the idea of life on other worlds, and sometimes being completely unhuman, like having different breeding cycles, or that humanity is rather insignificant in their eyes. I also like the idea of Aliens living amongst us all this time, as we never noticed it.]


    Abduction

    by Irish Bard

    Chapter 1: Contact.

    Are we alone in the universe?

    Is there intelligent life on other worlds?

    Will we make contact with them?

    Have we made contact with them?

    Are they living amongst us as we speak?

    Short answer, yes

    These were the thoughts that spun through Emma's mind as she was transported on the sheet of a strange metal construction, arms and legs spread wide, thankfully still fully clothed, into the space ship. She had been abducted by aliens. It was like having everything she had been trying to prove slapping her in her face.

    As a physics student at a California Uni, and being unfortunate enough to decide to skip uni to go to waterfront, she had been spending most of her time on a paper stating categorically that humanity will not be able to successfully contact alien life, to find that not only had aliens found Earth, but made their way to it, and jammed a fish in her ear!

    "I AM AT MY LIMIT!" she screamed. "THIS IS THE LAST STRAW, IF SOMEONE DOESN'T COME OUT BEHIND SOMETHING TELLING ME IT HAS BEEN A HUGE SET UP, I AM GOING TO EXPLODE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    "My advice is to relax, and you might not," came the calm, sultry tones of Julia, or Jul'ia as she had revealed to Emma. "These are Vecarn, a bunch of total bastards, and if you make another outburst like that, then that's what will happen."

    She moved next to Emma, showing her a humanoid form with a bunch of tendrils coming out of her hair, her green and yellow eyes flashing. "They've been traveling from planet to planet, taking fertile members of the race and breeding with them. Once you see what one without armor looks like, you can guess how they managed to not get laid."

    "Why should I believe you!" hissed Emma. "You're not human, you're probably in league with them!"

    "Oh, come off it," Jul'ia replied. "If I was, why wasn't I left? More to the point, these guys are seriously clueless and careless; they just scan you for fertility and pick you up. Trust me, make a racket or don't do what I say, and end up a lot worse."

    Emma was about to reply, but the guards came through in huge, tank-like space suits, armed with all manner of strange weapons that all looked dangerous and rather spiky.

    "CKARNAYJIJKNAOYA ADGTJNKIATAVAAX ACSDFCZFKLDA!" they said, but it was picked up by the weird fish as "Take the prisoners to the captain."

    The line of strange devices moved its way down the ship. The ship itself didn't look in good repair; pipes were leaking, strange vermin were scurrying, or flopping, everywhere, clanks could be heard for miles.

    "Their scavengers," muttered Jul'ia, "don't know the true power of what they have until one of them blows up with it. This might be because of a lack of sensible minds in their race."

    "What?"

    "Only one female Vecarn ever recorded at one given date. As a result, they are often deeply sexist, so be careful. They also know very little about genetics, thinking that peoples' intelligence come from genes."

    The carriage stopped, ending up in the Bridge, and it was here that Emma saw the captain and the Vecarn true form.

    The tank-like armor was tight fitting, as the body of the captain was over ten feet tall. Bedecked in strange jewels and trinkets, the Captain looked like an anthropomorphic maroon rhinoceros with a mane of spikes all the way down his back and scars all over his face. He was carrying possibly the biggest weapon that Emma had ever seen, an enormous, badly made and electrically charged, axe over twice the size of him.

    The procession of women slowly stopped in front of him; a smaller colleague sat next to him, a Vecarn in a strange laboratory coat, saying "Brawn" or "Brain", and the women going different ways depending on it. Emma looked up at him.

    "Brain," he said, and Emma was carried off to the right.

    "What's happening?"

    "Be glad that you got chosen for the brains," muttered Jul'ia. "If you hadn't, you'd be fattened up until immobility, rutted and raped when so, and turned, biologically, into a breeding factory, slowly losing your humanity until you are a vegetable."

    "And that doesn't happen in the brain group."

    "Oh yeah, it does, just A) you get to choose who ruts on you, and B) no vegetation part," Jul'ia replied with a smile. "It's a harsh group, but don't worry, I've got a plan to get out!"
     
  2. Apr 2, 2008 #2

    Scott M

    Scott M

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    I'm sorry, but your stories here are terrible.
     
  3. Apr 2, 2008 #3

    Zoom

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    This sounds like trying too hard to write like Douglas Adams without his originality or humor. I was like that at age thirteen, for crying out loud!

    Still, that's not to say this work isn't salvageable. I'm sure other people will say that.
     
  4. Apr 2, 2008 #4

    snipermb435

    snipermb435

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    you guys obviously dont read his other works, i think he was just trying someething new, either way i like it, give the man a break in the furture instead of coming strait out and saying omg that was crap(you said summin close to it). either way, leave the man alone unless it is constructive critique.
     
  5. Apr 2, 2008 #5

    szofiel

    szofiel

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    ...both Scott M and Zoom, which stories have you wrote that are on the library?
     
  6. Apr 2, 2008 #6

    Paquito

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    don't July to me

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    funny, since the last great work I read of Scott M was....oh wait, never.
     
  7. Apr 3, 2008 #7

    Risible

    Risible

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    I'm not going to delete your remark, but really, it is uncalled for. Lighten up.

    /mod

    Personally, I don't agree. I think Irish Bard, who has posted several stories, shows a fine spirit and genuine creativity. Not to mention the guts to put his work out there.
     
  8. Apr 3, 2008 #8

    BellySpongelover

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    Interesting start to something new Bard. I look forward to more.
     
  9. Apr 3, 2008 #9

    isotope

    isotope

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    What?

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    So, because someone hasn't written a WG fic, they aren't allowed an opinion? You can't take into account what they've read or studied? I'm sure we can't even take into consideration basics of grammar and general english.

    I'm sorry but I think criticism is a strong tool for growth for a writer, good and bad. I also think someone can know a thing or two about writing without having to write a novel or short story. Just like Ebert and Roeper can have an opinion about film, but have never made a film themselves.

    Scott M's remark wasn't right, I'm not going to defend him just blatantly knocking IrishBard, but Zoom had points in his criticism. If IrishBard is older than 12, I'm sure he can take the criticism.

    Personally, I think there's not enough sci-fi related WG fics, so i'm all for IrishBard to continue this one.

    My 2 cents.
     
  10. Apr 3, 2008 #10

    szofiel

    szofiel

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    ...Thank you very much for your answer. And, yes, you're quite right. NOT everyone has to be in the same arena in order to express their opinions. However, after comments so crude and categoric, isn't that bad to remind people how painful, humble and generous one single person could be, in order to create something to share their work. Even more, without any kind of payment but feedback and just that.

    But the point is clear, let the writers do their work and if you don't like it, there's no need to crap on it, maybe making clear why you didn't love the thing. This board it's not only about bigger women and the folks loving them, instead, as subtle culture about tolerance, even if it comes after a sexy fashion.
     
  11. Apr 3, 2008 #11

    Bigbastard23

    Bigbastard23

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    they're both within their rights to complain
    and rightly so
     
  12. Apr 3, 2008 #12

    Observer

    Observer

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    "Criticism" in the fine arts technically is really commentary and evaluation - positive and negative. That's why those who do it for a living are called "critics."

    Within reasonable bounds most writers appreciate criticism and the editors and moderators here allow it. In fact that's why we don't lock every story thread - we want comments. Most writers appreciate them.

    But there are limits. When "criticism" shifts from meaningful commentary on a story to personal remarks about an author, or itself starts to become questionable in its content, there is "law west of the Pecos." (Anyone literate enough to catch that allusion gets the day's gold star in TV history.) We can and have moderated comments and will do so if needed in the future.

    So, let's remember to play nice and everyone will be able to enjoy the resource we have here.
     
  13. Apr 3, 2008 #13

    IrishBard

    IrishBard

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    womble/leprechaun hybrid!

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    ok, what is so terrible about them.

    before you start, let me just tell you that as a critic of other works, you can't really get by with just saying "They're terrible" otherwise you will get people, like these well meaning people here, bollocking you for giving such a lack-luster review. I'm a fine one to talk about stuff here, but I generally think that most of it is good material, but when I do critise it, then I do make sure that I include my reasons behind it.

    feel free to rant and rave at me for being a little upstart who doesn't know when to keep his trap shut. I've had it before.

    I am deeply flattered that you try to compare me to Douglas Adams, but I wasn't trying to be.

    How?

    work on this story will temporarily halt until Scott M and Zoom reply to my post.
     
    Risible likes this.
  14. Apr 3, 2008 #14

    Zoom

    Zoom

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    I didn't submit anything to the library. For a while, my FA work was on another website, but I have kept it from here because apparently satire is just not appreciated on this site.
     
  15. Apr 4, 2008 #15

    Observer

    Observer

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    Ummmm - there are some stories here that I would call satirical.

    Within the stated guidelines we actually have a great deal of diversity.

    Why not send me a sample at observer_writer@yahoo.com? We'll talk.
     
  16. Apr 4, 2008 #16

    Lardibutts

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    Fair enough Judge Bean. But there is criticism and criticism.

    Critics in the media get paid for being noticed and that means generating memorable (often shocking) soundbites.
    I am hoping for the other sort of criticism in posting on this web site, the kind you get in education where the intention is to encourage self-improvement.
    The way to do this is to first praise the good bits, then gently put the boot in about the crap, and end with a constructive suggestion or two.

    Irish Bard got no end of positive feedback for The Joker Chronicles and rightly so IMHO - it was a very original piece.
     
  17. Apr 4, 2008 #17

    IrishBard

    IrishBard

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    womble/leprechaun hybrid!

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    yeah, i tried to do a farse of "Snakes on a plane." you might not consider it your level, though.
     
  18. Apr 5, 2008 #18

    IrishBard

    IrishBard

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    Chapter 2: Analyzing

    "Don't touch that."

    "Why?"

    "It's poisonous - nor that!"

    "Why?"

    "Its explosive! Seriously, keep your hands off that!"

    "Why, is it angry, hungry, explosive? WHY CAN'T I TOUCH IT?!!" stormed Emma, in a bad mood. All the time she had been on the spaceship, she had been bossed around by Jul'ia telling her not to touch this or not to sleep on that, or not to eat that plant. She was hungry, she was curious, and she was tired, and so far, nothing bad had happened to people who did touch the stuff.

    "That's mine," said Jul'ia, "get your own." She continued to eat the strange befanged mushroom. "It's perfectly harmless, get one and pick it up. Though, knowing who the Vecarn's employ as gardeners, it's bound to be spiked."

    "Who?"

    "Ganiments. Experts in slipping drugs into various stuff when people least expect it." Jul'ia took another bite. "Yep, been spiked with appetite stimulant. I know how to detect Ganiment drugs; had it done to me before."

    "What was it?"

    "Knockout drug. I was at this party when a Ganiment came over offering a drink. I said yes, one thing lead to another, and I found myself in his spaceship naked along with three other females. The advantage to being a Me'duza is that you can terminate unwanted featosis at will. I left, but not before carrying off a lot of his money."

    "Won't the appetite stimulate affect you?"

    "Look, eat it, before that guard gets suspicious. They're probably bringing out the troughs next, full of high-fat food."

    "Why are they doing this?!" hissed Emma quickly before taking the bite. The mushroom was bitter and she could taste the heavy metallic taste of the appetite stimulant. "Don't they know that the human fertility cycle doesn't work on weight?"

    "One cycle fits all is how they see it," Jul'ia replied. "The only Vecarn female's cycle is based on weight, so they see the rest of the universe as that. You know that's not true for humans, and as for Me'duza, we can control our fertility at will; however, lowering it too far for too long can make us sour bitches, while raising it too high for too long can make us slutty cows." There was a loud clunk. "Bon apetite, Emma."

    The food troughs were gigantic. Nothing technical about them, just metal troughs with a pipe with strange orange gunk flowing into it. The moment her eyes looked at the gunk, Emma's mouth began to water. She began to barge her way through the tightly knit group of women stuffing themselves from the trough, and began to pile great handfuls into her mouth, chomping, chewing and churning the food in her mouth before whisking it down her gullet. Not until the troughs were taken away did she look at the damage it had caused.

    Her petite figure had bulged. Her boobs had grown at least six cup sizes, making her shirt ride high, revealing her formerly toned, now flabby stomach. Her arse was enormous, like a pair of cushions had been taped to each cheek, and her thighs made her trousers like sausage skin. She felt her face and cheeks; definitely bigger than before.

    "Cheer up," said a similarly shaped Jul'ia, her long skirt barely coming down to her knees and her tank top almost breaking. "You only took a couple of bites from that mushroom; others had scoffed the lot, along with other stuff to intensify the final effect. Look around you, some of the women here must have gained at least 300 pounds at a pinch. We got off lightly."

    "How are we going to get out of here?" asked Emma, as an enormous woman ran past, screeching, her titanic thighs slapping together.

    "If you want to die in the vacuum of space, you can leave now," Jul'ia replied, "Don't fret, Galatpol will be here soon. If we just sit tight for a couple of days, we should be fine."

    "Sit... tight..." replied Emma as she laid down and drifted off to sleep, awakened only when three people told her to move.
     
  19. Apr 7, 2008 #19

    Jim_luvs_em_fat07

    Jim_luvs_em_fat07

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    The story seems to jump from one extreme to another, it also has no backround info
     
  20. Apr 7, 2008 #20

    IrishBard

    IrishBard

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    all will be explained in the next chapter.
     

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