Being able to force attraction would mean that someone had control of another's feelings and deep instinctual reactions. Yeah, I'm pretty sure thats impossible without being one of the X-men or something like that. One can however learn how to add the necessary ingredients that make for one steaming hot plate of yummy attraction goodness. Sometimes it burns, sometimes its under-done, but the more times you try the more often you start succeeding...and boy-howdy there is nothing tastier than some perfectly prepared hot lovin' on a Saturday night that was cooked in your own kitchen with all the tender lovin' care that you put into it.I've never really been "looking". Sure I'm open if I find someone who shares mutual attraction, but I've been super passive about the whole thing. It's just not something that you should force, and forever being the third wheel, I've seen what happens when people try to force relationships.
I know what you meant, and thats what I said what I did. Because even in your example its not true "force". Its only the illusion of control that the abusive or needy person feels that makes them believe they can do actualy something about how another person feels. That they can cause the other person "Need" them as much as they think they "Need" their partner. Guys do it a lot, but you might see it less because most women can "Feel" those type of guys and they read as creepy, needy, control freaks. Its really just classic codependent behavior that can lead to seriusly messed up attitudes, behaviors, and actions. Also the guys that do it, tend to be like that behind closed doors where they can beat their partner and be abusive without the prying eyes of others.Odd I thought I replied here, but I don't see my reply! Oh well here goes again.
When I say "force" a relationship I don't mean by forcing the other person to like you, that indeed would require some kind of superman ability, and would completely ruin being in a loving relationship anyways.
What I mean by force is do anything you can to keep a relationship that simply not meant to be alive. Keeping a relationship where one person is abusive is a great example of this, but can also be simply two people who don't really get along, have very little in common, but are just afraid of being alone so they perservere and hold onto the relationship. I think this is more common with women, but I've seen guys do it too.
I was separated for 3 years and dated the entire time. In fact, I didn't finish off my divorce until I was already engaged to someone else. That was certainly NOT planned, but life happens.I don't know anymore - If I'm "Separated" but not yet "Divorced" am I allowed to be looking?
Thanks for that, lifeneedsmore :kiss2:I was separated for 3 years and dated the entire time. In fact, I didn't finish off my divorce until I was already engaged to someone else. That was certainly NOT planned, but life happens.