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sia27

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Feb 12, 2022
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I'm new to this community and since I'm gay myself, I was wondering whether there were any gay BHMs on here. I'm curious to find out :)
 
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loopytheone

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Hi there, welcome! @Shotha comes to mind, and I'm sure there are others than I'm forgetting too!
 

loopytheone

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Ah, I really miss the old LGBT board we used to have here. Trouble is, as traffic slowed down, it was rarely ever used. Threads like this make more sense than having a whole board these days, but ah! I'm always happy to see more LGBT people here.
 

Anomaly

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It has always been my impression, probably based on the amount of porn and erotic art that exists, that fat men and people who appreciate them are much more usual among the gay than the straight. Welcome large gay men. :)
 
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It has always been my impression, probably based on the amount of porn and erotic art that exists, that fat men and people who appreciate them are much more usual among the gay than the straight. Welcome large gay men. :)
I think that one has to remember that gay life was persecuted and illegal for much of the twentieth century. As a result of that gay men had to be very inventive with their methods of finding the sort of partner that they wanted. Methods included the hanky code and special codes used in the personal advertisements in gay magazines. As we had less time than the heterosexual majority to find the right partner, we had to be more explicit about what we wanted. I think that for these reasons gay men were probably the first to admit having a preference for fat men. I don't know if the preference for fat partners is more prevalent among gay men but I think that we're more likely to be open about it.
 

Anomaly

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I know I have no right to complain when people in some parts of the world are still persecuted and murdered simply for being gay, but I honestly envy how straightforward gay men often seem to be about fat fetishism and preferences. :) It possibly is the culture of codes and openness to search online that you describe as opposed to numbers, but there are huge volumes of fat male and feeder art by gay men online, and fat gay men making amateur porn with their partners. There is very little of the heterosexual equivalent. They also seem to have established terminology of 'chub and chaser' which is fairly intuitive unlike 'BHM & FFA' which are clumsy acronyms whose meaning is vague (it could mean tall men and people who admire fat females).
Being heterosexual and female and a fat fetishist and trying to find people to have relationships really sucked in my experience of it. You get 'straight' men who don't really like women sexually but pursue them because they want to be a father and have the lifestyle of a traditional marriage. You get men who have never really thought about their own bodies and what they like and just assume that sex is doing what you were told how animals breed in a Biology lesson at school. You get fat men who do like women but hate their own bodies and can't stand earnest physical affection directed at their moobs and butts because society tells them that women are not attracted to fat men. The idea of just enjoying someone's company and body for what it is and exploring what you like together seems to pass a lot of them by. The young gay men I knew back when I was young really seemed to know what they wanted from a relationship and how and where to ask for it! :)
Sorry for the derailment, but lots to celebrate if you're a gay man, and 'chub and chaser' seems to be the phrase to google and the parties to attend!
 

agouderia

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It has always been my impression,.... exists, that fat men and people who appreciate them are much more usual among the gay than the straight. Welcome large gay men. :)
I would like to disagree.
I'm with you that gay men - today & in most Western countries - are much more open and vocal about their sexuality and all its aspects which includes the chubby-chaser sub-sculture because they had to fight so hard for the right to simply live their lives.
But from my experience - which includes a sizable circle of gay friends - thin pressure up to body-shaming in the mainstream gay community (again in the Western hemisphere) is as tough as it is among the conservative blonde female <25 set.

In contrast, while few straight adult women (not the <20 crowd) openly, let alone vocally identify as FFA, a considerable portion is actually pretty tolerant if their guy is on the chubby side. Serious fat-shaming for men starts at the lowest at about BMI 32.
 
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I would like to disagree.
I'm with you that gay men - today & in most Western countries - are much more open and vocal about their sexuality and all its aspects which includes the chubby-chaser sub-sculture because they had to fight so hard for the right to simply live their lives.
But from my experience - which includes a sizable circle of gay friends - thin pressure up to body-shaming in the mainstream gay community (again in the Western hemisphere) is as tough as it is among the conservative blonde female <25 set.

In contrast, while few straight adult women (not the <20 crowd) openly, let alone vocally identify as FFA, a considerable portion is actually pretty tolerant if their guy is on the chubby side. Serious fat-shaming for men starts at the lowest at about BMI 32.
In a nutshell, we (fat gay men and chasers) still experience fat shaming from other gays but we have learned from the gay community to be more explicit about our desires.
 

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