"Dear Fat People....."

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wrestlingguy

"Bitter Old Man"
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I'm sure the regular readers here are aware of the fat hating video that went viral last week that starred a quasi celebrity named Nicole Arbour. She goes on and on for almost 15 minutes about how horrible fat people are, etc.

I'm not going to link to it, simply because I don't want to give this person any more views and media coverage than she's already gotten. While her account was suspended by YouTube for hate speech, that little victory was short lived, as her account has been reinstated.

What I got from all of this media coverage is that media does it because it gets reaction from fat people. Gets. It. Every. Time.

And that reaction often comes as a collected effort to send hate back to the person(s) who start it. I think the only winner in battles like this are the media, who gets hits on their website, or listeners/viewers to their media.

While I'm not advocating the abandonment of activism, I think that there are levels of activism that work better than others, and in this particular case I think that screaming negative comments back at Ms. Arbour won't accomplish a thing. In fact it might make things worse. To that end, at least her video had the comments disabled.

With that said, Whitney Thore of TLC's "My Big Fat Fabulous Life" had a pretty salient response to Arbour's hate rant, and addressed it pretty much point by point. IF you'd like to take the time, here's a link to her response:

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2YYZBrPwwU[/ame]

Just as important, I think that we all need to sit back sometimes and realize that without us (generally the Fat Acceptance community), a self proclaimed "comedienne" like this has no other way to garner any kind of attention, mostly because she has no talent. While I don't generally think much of memes, I do think that this particular one is pretty spot on when it comes to this.

View attachment Arbour.jpg
 

landshark

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I wanted to introduce some similar thoughts on this story but hesitated. While I detest the type of fat shaming this woman put on display I feel like over reacting and banning her and seizing her holdings and freezing her assets is a bad mistake. Everyone is entitled to speak their mind and sometimes that's hurtful to others. Sometimes it's designed that way. Sometimes the intent is to get a rise out of people. Rather than insist all speech be PC, I say let her have her say and try to make small changes on the margin so that someday there will not be a market for this kind of speech.
 

ksandru

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Even more surprising and hurtful were the responses from fat people who defended her hate speech. I don't know if they were going with herd mentality or if they hate themselves; just found it shocking to read.
 

wrestlingguy

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I wanted to introduce some similar thoughts on this story but hesitated. While I detest the type of fat shaming this woman put on display I feel like over reacting and banning her and seizing her holdings and freezing her assets is a bad mistake. Everyone is entitled to speak their mind and sometimes that's hurtful to others. Sometimes it's designed that way. Sometimes the intent is to get a rise out of people. Rather than insist all speech be PC, I say let her have her say and try to make small changes on the margin so that someday there will not be a market for this kind of speech.

I have a few questions for you or anyone else that wants to respond. If that type of shaming were to go on in a public place, would you allow it to go unanswered?

Second question. If the same speech was hurled at someone you loved, whether on the internet or in real life, would you still chalk it up to "letting her have her say" and not react?
 

landshark

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I have a few questions for you or anyone else that wants to respond. If that type of shaming were to go on in a public place, would you allow it to go unanswered?

It depends. If someone is open to having an intelligent discussion I'm happy to interact. If someone is just trying to be mean (as most cases of fat shaming are) then I'm inclined to ignore it because that is below me. Most of the time a response to something like that is emotionally charged and reactionary and not the best way to present your side of an argument.

Second question. If the same speech was hurled at someone you loved, whether on the internet or in real life, would you still chalk it up to "letting her have her say" and not react?

I already have. I wrote a thread about it a while ago. I was excoriated by some members and applauded by others.

I think the key to remember is everyone has a right to free speech (for our U.S. members) but nobody has a right to not be offended. I didn't watch blondie's little video and probably won't. I disagree with her message and dislike people like her who get their rocks off making fun of fat people. But I adamantly support her right to do it. That's part of life in a free society: stupid people exist and they have a right to be stupid.

http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/showthread.php?t=114738
 

wrestlingguy

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Well, it looks like Karma has reared its pretty little head, as it looks like someone who she was evidently set to work for has now decided NOT to use her on his project.
Here's the thing, we all have the right to say what we want, in the US, our Constitution guarantees it, even if what you want to say is hate speech, plain & simple
What it DOESN'T do is guarantee that you won't have to pay for your words in other ways.
Read the article.
http://fox4kc.com/2015/09/10/dear-fat-people-comedian-loses-job-over-fat-phobic-video/
 

landshark

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^ I agree with this, too. If a potential employer deems having this person on staff is detrimental to their image it is their right to seek someone else.
 

Green Eyed Fairy

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I really enjoyed Nicole Arbour's video...while eating my Hawaiian Punch flavored licorice.

Funny how her words, designed to help me finally realize that I'm fat and shouldn't eat so much, have the opposite effect.

I also find it amusing that she dyes her hair and has her nails done yet preaches about the "health effects" of over-eating. Does she skip meals?
What other potentially unhealthy things, should I decide to take it upon myself to let her know, should she give up? (can anyone say "playing the unhealthy card" to justify your prejudice?)

We all need guidance, eh?


But really....who gives a shit? She ain't the first and she won't be the last. It's also funny how she used such an old platform as a lame attempt to garner "fame". :rolleyes:

Really Nicole....that all you got?

Crikey :doh:
 

landshark

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^ Maybe as a teen she got dumped for a fat girl?
 

bbwvixen1

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Firstly I just want to comment on how gorgeous Whitney looks in that video!!....

I have a few questions for you or anyone else that wants to respond. If that type of shaming were to go on in a public place, would you allow it to go unanswered?

Second question. If the same speech was hurled at someone you loved, whether on the internet or in real life, would you still chalk it up to "letting her have her say" and not react?

To answer your questions to the best of my ability.... Just want to start off by saying; this generation is all about being true to self, expressing oneself and living life in a manner that makes you happy!

Would I allow it to go on unanswered? Hmm if she was verbally attacking someone of course not, I'd step in. If she was on a podium giving out that sorta speech I'd be that individual in the crowd that would disagree with her and go on my merry little way... Would I get into a verbal altercation with her? No, because I believe everyone is entitled to their opinion and her opinion to me is stupid and I don't argue with idiots!

Second question; if that was addressed to me or someone I loved of course I'd say something but I'd still "chalk it up" to letting her have her say, fact of the world is not everyone is nice, not everyone is rooting for you, the sooner I or someone I love realises that the better, because this "open and accepting" generation is -for lack of a better term- all about self - love and not letting someone else's opinion dictate who you are..

This world is full of -and this will probably still be true in many years to come- hateful people; homophobs, racists, bigots etc and I personally would rather have a person that's open about how they feel about people so I can deal with them appropriately, that could be by avoiding them, turning down their business, attacking them for their bigotry etc.

I'm just saying, since the world is now all about acceptance let's take the hatred that comes with nonconformity, so we can deal with it appropriately.
 
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