Long time reader, first time poster.
I have known since I was young that I have found bigger women more attractive, but thought I was alone. I only found out about communities such as this a few years ago. I've always been rather shy about this, but I feel this would probably help.
Let me try and explain my situation as best as I can right now.
I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend (not naming) for about 3 and a half years now, and are still going strong. She is aware of my attraction to bigger women, especially in the belly area, and has been for over a year now (she is the only person I know to know this other than myself). She has no problem with it at all and is happy for me to enjoy her curves (she isn't huge at all, but not exactly tiny either, slightly above "average" I would say) when we are alone.
Other than this she hasn't really changed anything, which I have had no problem with, we have talked about it as openly as possible and I love her not just for her weight and would not want to lose her over this, ever. (Although I have "joked" I would lose attraction if she lost a significant amount of weight from what she was at that point and she replied that she made sure that wouldn't happen).
However, she still has her "moments" occasionally and states she wants her belly to be a "little smaller", although she never wants to lose it entirely since she knows my preference. Occasionally she also loses appetite over a week or so, though this seems to be natural and not psycological. She has no real want to put on more weight, and this is fine, if she stayed at this weight I would be happy.
She is prone to being ill (it's rare to see her without an illness of some sort) and this did recently affect her, she was ill all week last week and this combined with her period of less appetite meant she lost half a stone (6lbs) in that week. She has begun to put this weight back on already by returning to normal eating patterns but I'm not sure if it will all come back. On the other hand she has also gained small amounts of weight before, but this is usually on term breaks where she dosne't have to cycle anywhere, and she loses most of that weight as soon as work starts again.
She is moderatley active and cycles everywhere, but still enjoys food when she isn't on a "lack of appetite period" which usually balances things out. I love her more than anything and this is not just about her weight. I fully understand that it is her body in the end and I would be no boyfriend to change it for myself, but I still have the inner desire for her to gain weight which I cannot change.
This is much more of a conflict with myself than with her.
I don't know how to settle this with myself, I am never going to make her gain weight "or I leave her", but I would never be able to put myself at rest internally if I let her lose a lot of weight and become rather skinny, altough that is worst-case scenario.
I might be overeacting, there may be no problem at all. But I just keep having thoughts that it could. I also hope this isn't boring or repetitive, etc. Thankyou so much for any experience you could give me.
I have known since I was young that I have found bigger women more attractive, but thought I was alone. I only found out about communities such as this a few years ago. I've always been rather shy about this, but I feel this would probably help.
Let me try and explain my situation as best as I can right now.
I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend (not naming) for about 3 and a half years now, and are still going strong. She is aware of my attraction to bigger women, especially in the belly area, and has been for over a year now (she is the only person I know to know this other than myself). She has no problem with it at all and is happy for me to enjoy her curves (she isn't huge at all, but not exactly tiny either, slightly above "average" I would say) when we are alone.
Other than this she hasn't really changed anything, which I have had no problem with, we have talked about it as openly as possible and I love her not just for her weight and would not want to lose her over this, ever. (Although I have "joked" I would lose attraction if she lost a significant amount of weight from what she was at that point and she replied that she made sure that wouldn't happen).
However, she still has her "moments" occasionally and states she wants her belly to be a "little smaller", although she never wants to lose it entirely since she knows my preference. Occasionally she also loses appetite over a week or so, though this seems to be natural and not psycological. She has no real want to put on more weight, and this is fine, if she stayed at this weight I would be happy.
She is prone to being ill (it's rare to see her without an illness of some sort) and this did recently affect her, she was ill all week last week and this combined with her period of less appetite meant she lost half a stone (6lbs) in that week. She has begun to put this weight back on already by returning to normal eating patterns but I'm not sure if it will all come back. On the other hand she has also gained small amounts of weight before, but this is usually on term breaks where she dosne't have to cycle anywhere, and she loses most of that weight as soon as work starts again.
She is moderatley active and cycles everywhere, but still enjoys food when she isn't on a "lack of appetite period" which usually balances things out. I love her more than anything and this is not just about her weight. I fully understand that it is her body in the end and I would be no boyfriend to change it for myself, but I still have the inner desire for her to gain weight which I cannot change.
This is much more of a conflict with myself than with her.
I don't know how to settle this with myself, I am never going to make her gain weight "or I leave her", but I would never be able to put myself at rest internally if I let her lose a lot of weight and become rather skinny, altough that is worst-case scenario.
I might be overeacting, there may be no problem at all. But I just keep having thoughts that it could. I also hope this isn't boring or repetitive, etc. Thankyou so much for any experience you could give me.
