Hey yall
where to start?
newb here with some questions. especially need some female/ relationship advice!
I am 23 yr old male, dating my girlfriend for a year now. i have dated girls of all sizes in the past, but my personal preference is for girls who are average + a few, my only real "upper" limit is that i have to be able to pick up and carry them. For reference, im about 5' 10", 145 lbs. i am fairly compact, with no real fat to speak of, about 2 in if i pinch about my waist.
ok. sorry for all the setup, im a long talker!
i met my girlfriend a year ago, and thought, wow, shes pretty skinny, about at the "skinniest" of what i find attractive, but still has a really nice figure. shes about my height, weighed about 135 lbs at the time. she is really thin, with the only real "meat" being her legs and butt. we fell in love and have been dating since then.
she has had some jealousy issues with an ex of mine whom she met, the ex happens to be about 5' 3", 170 lbs, large bust, etc. since then, she has been accusing me of being attracted to larger girls. i objected truthfully, because i really do not have a definitive preference for partner size, and the ex in question was at the "heaviest" end of the scale that i find attractive.
to complicate matters, before she met me, my current girlfriend had gone through a breakup and depression, and lost 20 lbs, taking her to her weight of 135. i casually mentioned that i wish i could have seen her at her heavier weight, which is what sparked the initial fight.
this was in the fall of this year. starting in january of this year, my current girlfriend went back on birth control, and has gained 5 lbs since january. i first began to notice it in her breasts, and her face looked a little fuller. she began to look a lot in her mirror, and complain about her jeans fitting tighter. personally, i was in heaven, and thought she looked beautiful and told her so.
to complicate matters, she has a mother who is very critical of herself, and says all the time how she is so fat (the mother speaking about herself, now) and how she needs to lose weight. also, my gf has very low self esteem and constantly looks for ways to pick on herself.
as soon as she noticed herself gaining weight, she looks in the mirror, sighs, says "im getting fat!" or she lifts up her shirt, grabs her little roll and shakes it, saying "im packing on the pounds" and gets really upset.
i tell her she looks beautiful and that guys around the world wish that they had a girlfriend as pretty as she is. but she doesnt seem to listen to me. she says "i need to exercise more" or "im getting chubby".
i love my girlfriend, and have every intention of marrying her when we finish college next year. i have told her this. i would love her at any weight, although i would hate to see her lose much more than the 5lbs she gained, she is still a really thin girl, as i said earlier, it is all in her amazing rear. i have told her this also.
last night she was complaining, and saying "look how far my stomach is sticking out" and when she sat in my car lifted up her shirt to reveal a perfect little roll sticking past her jeans. i did the only thing i knew how, reached out, rubbed it, and told her she was beautiful.
i just dont know what to do! i love my girlfriend and wish she could just love her body as much as i do. does anyone have any advice as to how i can get her to love herself, no matter what she weighs? i just want her to be happy.
thanks everybody
where to start?
newb here with some questions. especially need some female/ relationship advice!
I am 23 yr old male, dating my girlfriend for a year now. i have dated girls of all sizes in the past, but my personal preference is for girls who are average + a few, my only real "upper" limit is that i have to be able to pick up and carry them. For reference, im about 5' 10", 145 lbs. i am fairly compact, with no real fat to speak of, about 2 in if i pinch about my waist.
ok. sorry for all the setup, im a long talker!
i met my girlfriend a year ago, and thought, wow, shes pretty skinny, about at the "skinniest" of what i find attractive, but still has a really nice figure. shes about my height, weighed about 135 lbs at the time. she is really thin, with the only real "meat" being her legs and butt. we fell in love and have been dating since then.
she has had some jealousy issues with an ex of mine whom she met, the ex happens to be about 5' 3", 170 lbs, large bust, etc. since then, she has been accusing me of being attracted to larger girls. i objected truthfully, because i really do not have a definitive preference for partner size, and the ex in question was at the "heaviest" end of the scale that i find attractive.
to complicate matters, before she met me, my current girlfriend had gone through a breakup and depression, and lost 20 lbs, taking her to her weight of 135. i casually mentioned that i wish i could have seen her at her heavier weight, which is what sparked the initial fight.
this was in the fall of this year. starting in january of this year, my current girlfriend went back on birth control, and has gained 5 lbs since january. i first began to notice it in her breasts, and her face looked a little fuller. she began to look a lot in her mirror, and complain about her jeans fitting tighter. personally, i was in heaven, and thought she looked beautiful and told her so.
to complicate matters, she has a mother who is very critical of herself, and says all the time how she is so fat (the mother speaking about herself, now) and how she needs to lose weight. also, my gf has very low self esteem and constantly looks for ways to pick on herself.
as soon as she noticed herself gaining weight, she looks in the mirror, sighs, says "im getting fat!" or she lifts up her shirt, grabs her little roll and shakes it, saying "im packing on the pounds" and gets really upset.
i tell her she looks beautiful and that guys around the world wish that they had a girlfriend as pretty as she is. but she doesnt seem to listen to me. she says "i need to exercise more" or "im getting chubby".
i love my girlfriend, and have every intention of marrying her when we finish college next year. i have told her this. i would love her at any weight, although i would hate to see her lose much more than the 5lbs she gained, she is still a really thin girl, as i said earlier, it is all in her amazing rear. i have told her this also.
last night she was complaining, and saying "look how far my stomach is sticking out" and when she sat in my car lifted up her shirt to reveal a perfect little roll sticking past her jeans. i did the only thing i knew how, reached out, rubbed it, and told her she was beautiful.
i just dont know what to do! i love my girlfriend and wish she could just love her body as much as i do. does anyone have any advice as to how i can get her to love herself, no matter what she weighs? i just want her to be happy.
thanks everybody
