Ok ... I have been reading a great deal on this board lately ... asking a few questions publically ... attempting to ask a few questions privately ... to try to sort out my own impressions and feelings on the issue of feeders/feedees. I realize that -Rome- isn't built in a day and my own impressions and conclusions about myself won't be either ... however ... it's been a driving issue in my mind since finding the Dims board and right now ... it's just something I can't seem to let rest. It's possible that there are other reasons why I am feeling driven and that I'm looking to substitute other things that I am missing in my life right now by this draw ... but I am not sure.
I have never been able to wrap my mind around the concept of intentional weight gain. I am far too early in the whole scene of acceptance to really be able to throw my arms around it and make it mine ... I am however very interested in aspects of feeders/feedees. This brings me to my question ... do most of you who identify in some way with the feeder/feedee thing associate weight change with the whole concept? What I mean to say or ask rather is ... MUST weight change - specifically gain be a part of a relationship that you would personally classify as feeder/feedee? IF weight gain is NOT a part of the dynamic between a person who feeds another and a person who enjoys being fed, then what would you classify it as?
I fear giving too much information because I don't want to make this post so long that no one will bother to read it ... but I will try to quickly explain. In several of my past relationships including the one most recently past ... food was one of many central themes ... however weight gain was not. I was hand fed almost always including in public and did not order my own food. He already knew what I liked ... but I was fed whatever He wished to feed me. Now I realize that I've made no secret of my own M/s lifestyle and I KNOW that others are NOT comfortable with this sort of control. I know others assume this is abusive. I'd rather that be addressed elsewhere ... it was NOT abusive for me and it's not the point of this thread. Because I found this one of the most erotic parts of our interchange ... I have starting wondering more and more about my own tendencies as a feedee for lack of a better word.
Our relationship was a control based exchange and THAT was His primary reason for using food so intimately. It was not about weight gain or loss ... just about demonstrating dominance. I however am looking at it differently now and I am wondering if others classify feeder/feedee relationships only in terms of weight change. Just interested to understand how others think as I develop my own conclusions. Thank you in advance if you are willing to share!
♪midori
I have never been able to wrap my mind around the concept of intentional weight gain. I am far too early in the whole scene of acceptance to really be able to throw my arms around it and make it mine ... I am however very interested in aspects of feeders/feedees. This brings me to my question ... do most of you who identify in some way with the feeder/feedee thing associate weight change with the whole concept? What I mean to say or ask rather is ... MUST weight change - specifically gain be a part of a relationship that you would personally classify as feeder/feedee? IF weight gain is NOT a part of the dynamic between a person who feeds another and a person who enjoys being fed, then what would you classify it as?
I fear giving too much information because I don't want to make this post so long that no one will bother to read it ... but I will try to quickly explain. In several of my past relationships including the one most recently past ... food was one of many central themes ... however weight gain was not. I was hand fed almost always including in public and did not order my own food. He already knew what I liked ... but I was fed whatever He wished to feed me. Now I realize that I've made no secret of my own M/s lifestyle and I KNOW that others are NOT comfortable with this sort of control. I know others assume this is abusive. I'd rather that be addressed elsewhere ... it was NOT abusive for me and it's not the point of this thread. Because I found this one of the most erotic parts of our interchange ... I have starting wondering more and more about my own tendencies as a feedee for lack of a better word.
Our relationship was a control based exchange and THAT was His primary reason for using food so intimately. It was not about weight gain or loss ... just about demonstrating dominance. I however am looking at it differently now and I am wondering if others classify feeder/feedee relationships only in terms of weight change. Just interested to understand how others think as I develop my own conclusions. Thank you in advance if you are willing to share!
♪midori
