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Lamia

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Random guys will yell obscenities at me because I'm fat. I don't understand why it's my responsibility to provide them with "fap" material, but when people are hostile towards you based on how you look that anger has to come from somewhere. I think it comes from their need for every woman on the planet to give them wood.

Men and women both do this. We want to be surrounded by people we find attractive which is insane when we come from a society where monogamy reigns supreme.

Do you feel society will ever be at a place where we look at the people around us and just accept each other and value each other as we are?
 

Dr. Feelgood

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Do you feel society will ever be at a place where we look at the people around us and just accept each other and value each other as we are?
In every age and in every society, there have always been a few people who were capable of attaining this view of humanity. But they have always been a very small minority. Humans are tribal animals by nature, and the only way to maintain cohesion within the tribe is to view other tribes as potential enemies : "united we stand." The bottom line, sociologically, seems to be that people will cluster together with those most like them and react with hostility towards those they perceive as different. :(
 

Lamia

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I grew up in a very segregated society. For the first 30 years of my life I lived in a county the population is around 16,430 per wiki
.97.38% White, 1.50% Black or African American, 0.17% Native American, 0.24% Asian, 0.03% Pacific Islander, 0.12% from other races, and 0.56% from two or more races. 0.50% of the population were Hispanic or Latino of any race.

I prided myself on being open minded and having a desire to learn about other cultures and people. I never quite fit in with the people around me because I was a sci-fi geek into goth and alternative forms of expressing myself.

I moved away to Columbus Ohio which isn't New York, but it might as well be compared to where I am from. It's county population is about 1,163,414 per wiki 75.48% White, 17.89% Black or African American, 0.27% Native American, 3.07% Asian, 0.04% Pacific Islander, 1.03% from other races, and 2.23% from two or more races. 2.27% of the population were Hispanic or Latino of any race.

So it was a bit of a culture shock for me, even though I thought I was so progressive. I went to work for a very diverse company and was around people from all over the world it was a great experience.

In the beginning I was very nervous and fearful, but then again that's nothing new I am a shy person. I was disappointed in myself though because I knew this was fear of the unknown. Over time though I got over it and it became and very comfortable enjoyable place to work. I made a lot of friends. I worked with people of all sorts of ethnic and religious backgrounds and we all worked together very well.

I think our only chance in society to better ourselves is through diversity.
 

Dr. Feelgood

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I think our only chance in society to better ourselves is through diversity.
I might go so far as to say our only chance to survive AS a society is diversity. I'm optimistic about that, though. As it happens, I teach at the same university I attended as an undergraduate back in the '60's. At that time the school had only been integrated recently; there were few black students on campus, and they tended to keep to themselves. At graduate school in New York City in the '70's, I saw more interracial association. It was fairly common for black men to date white women, but the reverse -- black women dating white men -- was regarded as treason to one's race. On my campus today I see groups of students of all colors talking and laughing on their way to class; men and women of different ethnic backgrounds form friendships, date, and marry without exciting comment. We still have a long way to go, but I think we are pointed in the right direction. :)
 

superodalisque

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Random guys will yell obscenities at me because I'm fat. I don't understand why it's my responsibility to provide them with "fap" material, but when people are hostile towards you based on how you look that anger has to come from somewhere. I think it comes from their need for every woman on the planet to give them wood.

Men and women both do this. We want to be surrounded by people we find attractive which is insane when we come from a society where monogamy reigns supreme.

Do you feel society will ever be at a place where we look at the people around us and just accept each other and value each other as we are?
i think you do give them wood and thats the real problem. that type are cowardly and thats what makes them so angry. they will probably never get the chance to have you because they are too frightened. you know what the real problem i think a big girl is for some men? i think it makes them afraid they are too small and inadequate in a lot of different ways. big girls make them soft because they are scared and not because they don't like all of that woman they see in front of them. it challenges their masculinity. its not so easy for them to be a threat to you to make themselves feel better. a big girl CAN put up a fight. a big girl is NOT going to be easy to carry off against her will. she's not going ANYWHERE she does not want to go. thats why they get so angry. they know you're sexy already. thats why a lot who can't date you spend all of that money on fat porn these days. let them kiss your big sweet fat ass and keep on marching it proudly down the road baby. you have absolutely nothing to worry about but they do. unfortunately as long as there are people who are afraid of everything they are going to reach out to some kind of scapegoat to get the negative attention off them. it won't stop until people start taking it less seriously and see it for what it really is. men who really aren't attracted to beautiful fat women are too busy chasing after beautiful thin women to be bothered with abusing anybody. that's not how abuse works.

sings *i don't think you're ready for this jelly* ;)
 

Zandoz

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It could well be that in part it is about who gives who wood nd who doesn't...but more often than not I think it's more about the exponential growth of idiocy in numbers. And the fact that for all the good intentions, size acceptance is still mostly a matter of preaching to the choir. It's OK to be rude to fat people, and it's safer in numbers.
 

CurvaceousBBWLover

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i think you do give them wood and thats the real problem. that type are cowardly and thats what makes them so angry. they will probably never get the chance to have you because they are too frightened. you know what the real problem i think a big girl is for some men? i think it makes them afraid they are too small and inadequate in a lot of different ways. big girls make them soft because they are scared and not because they don't like all of that woman they see in front of them. it challenges their masculinity. its not so easy for them to be a threat to you to make themselves feel better. a big girl CAN put up a fight. a big girl is NOT going to be easy to carry off against her will. she's not going ANYWHERE she does not want to go. thats why they get so angry. they know you're sexy already. thats why a lot who can't date you spend all of that money on fat porn these days. let them kiss your big sweet fat ass and keep on marching it proudly down the road baby. you have absolutely nothing to worry about but they do. unfortunately as long as there are people who are afraid of everything they are going to reach out to some kind of scapegoat to get the negative attention off them. it won't stop until people start taking it less seriously and see it for what it really is. men who really aren't attracted to beautiful fat women are too busy chasing after beautiful thin women to be bothered with abusing anybody. that's not how abuse works.

sings *i don't think you're ready for this jelly* ;)
Great point, Felecia! At some point the fools need to put down their fat porn and develop some social skills.


 

CastingPearls

Go Big Or Go Home
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i think you do give them wood and thats the real problem. that type are cowardly and thats what makes them so angry. they will probably never get the chance to have you because they are too frightened. you know what the real problem i think a big girl is for some men? i think it makes them afraid they are too small and inadequate in a lot of different ways. big girls make them soft because they are scared and not because they don't like all of that woman they see in front of them. it challenges their masculinity. its not so easy for them to be a threat to you to make themselves feel better. a big girl CAN put up a fight. a big girl is NOT going to be easy to carry off against her will. she's not going ANYWHERE she does not want to go. thats why they get so angry. they know you're sexy already. thats why a lot who can't date you spend all of that money on fat porn these days. let them kiss your big sweet fat ass and keep on marching it proudly down the road baby. you have absolutely nothing to worry about but they do. unfortunately as long as there are people who are afraid of everything they are going to reach out to some kind of scapegoat to get the negative attention off them. it won't stop until people start taking it less seriously and see it for what it really is. men who really aren't attracted to beautiful fat women are too busy chasing after beautiful thin women to be bothered with abusing anybody. that's not how abuse works.

sings *i don't think you're ready for this jelly* ;)
As someone who's been there, I absolutely agree with this.
 

daddyoh70

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Random guys will yell obscenities at me because I'm fat. I don't understand why it's my responsibility to provide them with "fap" material, but when people are hostile towards you based on how you look that anger has to come from somewhere. I think it comes from their need for every woman on the planet to give them wood.
Men, they really don't deserve that title, like this are the same ones who think a wolf howl is a great pick up line, or think they should be dating nothing less than a super model 20 years younger than themselves. It really makes me wonder where this mentality developed. I never understood it and don't think I ever will.

Do you feel society will ever be at a place where we look at the people around us and just accept each other and value each other as we are?
No. On a positive note though. My youngest daughter is a junior in high school and my wife has told her horror stories of how she was made fun of in high school for being heavy. My daughter says she really doesn't see that happening much at all, so maybe there is hope.
 

bigmac

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Random guys will yell obscenities at me because I'm fat. I don't understand why it's my responsibility to provide them with "fap" material, but when people are hostile towards you based on how you look that anger has to come from somewhere. I think it comes from their need for every woman on the planet to give them wood.

Men and women both do this. We want to be surrounded by people we find attractive which is insane when we come from a society where monogamy reigns supreme.

Do you feel society will ever be at a place where we look at the people around us and just accept each other and value each other as we are?
I've observed this behavior too. However, I don't think sexual attraction (or lack there of) is the motivation. Some people -- who are often in very unfortunate circumstances themselves -- simultaneously lash out and try to boost their crumpled souls by attacking visible minorities. Since its no longer acceptable to lash out at racial minorities (at least in most circles) fat people will have to do.

In the great old movie Mississippi Burning Gene Hackman's character tells a story about his racist father who poisons the mule of a black neighbor who was a more successful farmer. The justification being "if you ain't better than a ****** who are you better than."

http://mrhackman.blogspot.com/2009/07/our-need-to-be-better-than-someone-else.html

I'm thinking that many outbursts against fat people are similarly motivated.
 

Lamia

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Some of the hostility hasn't been because they secretly want me. I'm not sure where the hostility comes from, but I really don't care I just want them to keep their opinions to themselves (and hopefully choke on them). I have noticed that as I age the comments are less and less, but I still will get the same looks. That familiar disapproving glance or stare to let you know you've let the world down.

For some people they hate themselves so much that they resent you showing any signs of joy because how dare you love yourself when you're ten times less attractive.
 

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