PeanutButterfly
Well-Known Member
Last night I had a conversation that I haven't been able to get out of my head all day. I guess it wasn't so much a conversation, more like a story a friend told me. It was like 3:30 am and me, my roommate, a mutual girlfriend and one of my guyfriends had decided to come back to my room after a few parties. We were all pretty drunk, although not terribly so as I remember this conversation quite well. My guyfriend was texting some girl and someone asked who she was. He said "This girl from work. She wants to hook up with me but I don't dig on fat chicks." I was laying down on my bed, eyes closed, drifting off when that comment snapped me awake. He continued, "Yeah this guy on my floor last year was in BBWs. It was so weird. We gave him a really hard time about it *snicker*" My friends just nodded in agreement and he kept going. "He had these pictures of hot girls on his door, probably his roommates or something, so one day we took them all down and drew them fat with permanent marker. It was great." And then the conversation turned to something else and I drifted off to blissful drunken sleep until this morning when I remembered this whole exchange again.
I'm still kind of in shock. First, I had no idea BBW had become a fairly universal term. Not only did my friend know what it meant but my girlfriends knew it too. I find this pretty surprising as none of them are in the size acceptance movement, not even close.
Second, its seriously f'ed up what they did to this poor kid. My guyfriend isn't the most enlightened guy, I used to think this was part of his charm. But after hearing this I'm really not a fan of him anymore. I think he might be gay and in serious denial so I'm sure he led the charge when someone else's sexuality was under siege. I'm really curious how they found out this guy was an FA. Did he tell them? Did they notice a pattern in girls? I'm thinking he must have admitted it at some point if they were sure enough to deface his door for the whole building to see. A lot of times I forget how hard it is to be an FA outside of Dims. My current bf is pretty slim so no one would ever question me about my preference and because it's a personal thing I usually keep it to myself. But because its so personal it must have really hurt this kid to be treated like that. This is the kind of shit that would push someone back into the "closet".
And finally, as a BBW this whole thing got to me too. It amazes me the lack of common sense in this world. I would never go up to a black, gay, asian, purple, whatever type of person and say that people who are attracted to them are screwed up. Its one thing to not be attracted to fat women, I get that. I'm personally not attracted to skinny Neanderthals (i.e. guyfriend from above). But I would never tell him that I like to bash skinny Neanderthal lovers in my spare time. I don't understand how he can look at me, someone who is clearly fat, and think that I wouldn't be offended by his disgust of FAs. Not only is he saying that there's something wrong with this FA on his floor but also that its so unfathomable for me to be attractive to *anyone* and if, god forbid, someone is attracted to me they should be publicly humiliated and shunned.
And the worst part is, I was too drunk to say any of this. To be fair if I had been sober I'm not sure I would have said everything from above but I should have said something, right? But then again, what do you say to that? Anyone else been in this situation?
I'm still kind of in shock. First, I had no idea BBW had become a fairly universal term. Not only did my friend know what it meant but my girlfriends knew it too. I find this pretty surprising as none of them are in the size acceptance movement, not even close.
Second, its seriously f'ed up what they did to this poor kid. My guyfriend isn't the most enlightened guy, I used to think this was part of his charm. But after hearing this I'm really not a fan of him anymore. I think he might be gay and in serious denial so I'm sure he led the charge when someone else's sexuality was under siege. I'm really curious how they found out this guy was an FA. Did he tell them? Did they notice a pattern in girls? I'm thinking he must have admitted it at some point if they were sure enough to deface his door for the whole building to see. A lot of times I forget how hard it is to be an FA outside of Dims. My current bf is pretty slim so no one would ever question me about my preference and because it's a personal thing I usually keep it to myself. But because its so personal it must have really hurt this kid to be treated like that. This is the kind of shit that would push someone back into the "closet".
And finally, as a BBW this whole thing got to me too. It amazes me the lack of common sense in this world. I would never go up to a black, gay, asian, purple, whatever type of person and say that people who are attracted to them are screwed up. Its one thing to not be attracted to fat women, I get that. I'm personally not attracted to skinny Neanderthals (i.e. guyfriend from above). But I would never tell him that I like to bash skinny Neanderthal lovers in my spare time. I don't understand how he can look at me, someone who is clearly fat, and think that I wouldn't be offended by his disgust of FAs. Not only is he saying that there's something wrong with this FA on his floor but also that its so unfathomable for me to be attractive to *anyone* and if, god forbid, someone is attracted to me they should be publicly humiliated and shunned.
And the worst part is, I was too drunk to say any of this. To be fair if I had been sober I'm not sure I would have said everything from above but I should have said something, right? But then again, what do you say to that? Anyone else been in this situation?
