It hit me today that for some FA, including me for at least part of my life, fat may be as much a hobby as a sexual preference or a fetish. Actually, a fairly nerdy, if not obsessive, sort of hobby at that, I think. You know how some young men will get really into, say, baseballs New York Yankees? And theyll read and memorize everything they can on the subject, develop all time all star Yankee team rosters, and so on and so forth. Or likewise with chess, or Dungeons and Dragons, or their favorite band or lifting weights.
Well, I know in my adolescence and early twenties I went through my local library and read almost everything listed under obesity in the card catalog, from bad teen fiction to Fat is a Feminist Issue. I carefully looked at the size charts in the Sears catalog and memorized what measurements went with what size. I analyzed BMI calculations, learned what I could about densities of fat versus other tissues, did some geometry, and came up with a formula to estimate clothing size and belly projection based on BMI and height, and then estimated BMIs based on belly projection for years. At one point I bought a bunch of blank index cards, developed a bunch of rules incorporating random and deliberate elements, and developed an entire imaginary school class for people who like fat, eventually tracking their weight up and downs, their friendships and relationships, over an arc of over a dozen years. And lord knows what all else small, throw-away moments of obsession.
From what Ive seen casually mentioned by some other FA over the year, this may not have been typical of most, but that at least some minority did similar things. They just spent a lot of time thinking about fat stuff, and found various ways to channel those thoughts
The think about young men and obsessive hobbies is that eventually they run into the real world, and they discover that there are lots of people that dont share their hobby. In fact, nearly the entire world doesnt share it. But sometimes that learning process can be rough. Oh, they already knew lots of people who didnt share it, but they expect that when they find someone who shares some similar trait in this regard, that theyll find this equally interesting. You cheer for the Yankees? Who would you rather have hitting, bottom of the ninth, one run down, a runner on second base? You play chess? What is your rating? Do you prefer the Nobokov or Schnorkelheimmer response to the Figure-Four Quandry? Oh, you played Dungeons and Dragons too? What did you think of Weasel Games supplement for Hafling Ninja? Hey, I saw you in the weight room the other day, it looked to me like your posture was a bit off on those curls, you should have had your elbow more in line with your shoulder and your back at a ten degree angle. And they find out that someone who shares a bit of interest doesnt necessarily share such an in depth, dare I say obsessive, interest. Maybe they find someone else who cares so deeply about whatever their obsession is, or more likely they mellow a bit, and learn to expand their interests farther, tone down their focus on that one subject, and rub along well enough with everyone else.
And likewise with a certain set of young FA. They perhaps find their first BBW girlfriend, and want to know the measurements of her every body part, and her exact weight, and to track those if they change. Or if they talk to someone who says they like being fat, they want to know exactly how big that person wants to be. Or they come here and ask for detailed answers on fairly strange seeming questions.
Oh, and that weights and measurement thing, yah, I did that, back when my wife and I were first dating. :doh: After a couple of years it finally dawned on me that she really was not that interested, and while it was baffling to me, seemed unlikely to ever actually care about how big around her thighs were (and in case any young FA are wondering: no, I didnt keep those numbers so there is no chance of convincing me to provide them).
So here is another mental model to possibly use when you hit some FA with a ton of innapropriate seeming questions: treat it a bit like you would being asked which Star Trek captain you like better. Explain that while you may think fat is fine stuff (or something you have to live with anyway), you really are not that fascinated, nor are most other people around here.
Other thoughts/opinions on this way of looking at things?
Well, I know in my adolescence and early twenties I went through my local library and read almost everything listed under obesity in the card catalog, from bad teen fiction to Fat is a Feminist Issue. I carefully looked at the size charts in the Sears catalog and memorized what measurements went with what size. I analyzed BMI calculations, learned what I could about densities of fat versus other tissues, did some geometry, and came up with a formula to estimate clothing size and belly projection based on BMI and height, and then estimated BMIs based on belly projection for years. At one point I bought a bunch of blank index cards, developed a bunch of rules incorporating random and deliberate elements, and developed an entire imaginary school class for people who like fat, eventually tracking their weight up and downs, their friendships and relationships, over an arc of over a dozen years. And lord knows what all else small, throw-away moments of obsession.
From what Ive seen casually mentioned by some other FA over the year, this may not have been typical of most, but that at least some minority did similar things. They just spent a lot of time thinking about fat stuff, and found various ways to channel those thoughts
The think about young men and obsessive hobbies is that eventually they run into the real world, and they discover that there are lots of people that dont share their hobby. In fact, nearly the entire world doesnt share it. But sometimes that learning process can be rough. Oh, they already knew lots of people who didnt share it, but they expect that when they find someone who shares some similar trait in this regard, that theyll find this equally interesting. You cheer for the Yankees? Who would you rather have hitting, bottom of the ninth, one run down, a runner on second base? You play chess? What is your rating? Do you prefer the Nobokov or Schnorkelheimmer response to the Figure-Four Quandry? Oh, you played Dungeons and Dragons too? What did you think of Weasel Games supplement for Hafling Ninja? Hey, I saw you in the weight room the other day, it looked to me like your posture was a bit off on those curls, you should have had your elbow more in line with your shoulder and your back at a ten degree angle. And they find out that someone who shares a bit of interest doesnt necessarily share such an in depth, dare I say obsessive, interest. Maybe they find someone else who cares so deeply about whatever their obsession is, or more likely they mellow a bit, and learn to expand their interests farther, tone down their focus on that one subject, and rub along well enough with everyone else.
And likewise with a certain set of young FA. They perhaps find their first BBW girlfriend, and want to know the measurements of her every body part, and her exact weight, and to track those if they change. Or if they talk to someone who says they like being fat, they want to know exactly how big that person wants to be. Or they come here and ask for detailed answers on fairly strange seeming questions.
Oh, and that weights and measurement thing, yah, I did that, back when my wife and I were first dating. :doh: After a couple of years it finally dawned on me that she really was not that interested, and while it was baffling to me, seemed unlikely to ever actually care about how big around her thighs were (and in case any young FA are wondering: no, I didnt keep those numbers so there is no chance of convincing me to provide them).
So here is another mental model to possibly use when you hit some FA with a ton of innapropriate seeming questions: treat it a bit like you would being asked which Star Trek captain you like better. Explain that while you may think fat is fine stuff (or something you have to live with anyway), you really are not that fascinated, nor are most other people around here.
Other thoughts/opinions on this way of looking at things?
