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Internet Dating: Crazy First Messages

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Well-Known Member
Aug 15, 2009
I got a message today on POF that made me think of some of the totally ridiculous/tasteless/hilarious initial contacts my friends and I sometimes get on internet dating sites. It makes no sense to me that someone could say some of these things, and actually expect a woman to reply! Insane.

So I thought it might be funny for us to copy and paste some of these first messages that some of us (women and men!) may get from time to time, just to laugh, and to learn some valuable lessons about internet dating. ;)

I don't have a really great one to start out with, I usually just delete them, so I'll just post the one from today that prompted this thread. This one isn't so much funny, as just tasteless. But it will have to do for now.

"you have with out a doubt some very hot and perfect boobs ive ever seen. they look great. the picture of you in red and blue they look so damn good. hit me up if your up for chatting."

Classy. How are you still single, man?

Lesson: Do not mention someone's boobs in your first message.

And another one, for good measure. This one is from the "I lie and am also too lazy to compose a different message for every girl I send a message to" type. I love the first line, how he can't even bother to put in my age and just says "age as said on your profile." HILARIOUS.

"Hi, You look so innocent and younger than your age as said on your profile couldn't help saying Hi, I love to get acquainted to you if you don't mind . How often do you smile I love to laugh, and I am a bit of an extrovert myself Presently I am working on a contract in Aberdeen Scotland, hope to return soon my job is kinda demanding but I still have time for my loved ones I have a daughters I love so much. I'm a widower I lost my wife an African America some years ago to cancer I have been a lonely man since then how about you?, I will be really obliged to have correspondence with you I am very easy going with dreams and inspiration for the future life is too short to toy with I don't have time for games.........."

Lesson: Go ahead and put forth the effort to write a unique message to each girl you're interested in. It's not that hard.

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