This is for anyone who wants to read it. Thought you'd find it interesting.
Description: 19 year old man, West Coast. Adores big women. His friends give him hell, his family is very health and weight conscious and also give him hell and grief. He writes: How do you stand up to 'em?
Our exchange, beginning with my response:
Hi, XXXX---
Thanks for dropping a line. You are obviously a man of taste and polish!
I told J you said hi. She is right next to me on the couch. She
says, "Tell him I said hi back!"
I anoint you, give you permission, nay, demand you live your life exactly
as you see fit.
You don't like thin women as sexual partners. You think of fat women in
the dark. You eyeball them at Starbucks, at the movies, wherever you go.
That isn't going to change until the day you die. You will never, ever be
satisfied with a thin woman no matter how beautiful, charming, witty and
sweet she may be.
That's that.
People can deal with it, or not. I do not have friends who make cracks,
about anything like the way someone looks or their weight. When I think of
my friends, I picture a group of people who are aware, enlightened,
intelligent and non-judgemental, and I can't imagine them even coming
close to a space of making a comment about someone's weight.
I also can go from a sweet, friendly, compassionate man to fury
in a split second, and people know this. I will say exactly what's on my
mind and I am not always nice about it, though I try. People do not make
many or any cracks to me, not strangers, not people I know, not my family.
You're not there yet.
No amount of shit people sling can match the feeling of putting your arms
around a nice, soft, bouncy lady with a big belly, big thighs, big butt
and a sweet smile. It's totally worth putting up with a little grief, or
dealing with it, in order to know that kind of heaven.
When I was 27, I went to live in an Indian ashram for 5 months, and did
not communicate with my family except for letters. Today, they are happy
that I am happy, and my older brother, who is a physiologist specializing
in diabetes and obesity, hasn't ever said one word about J's size. He
knows better.
You're not entirely ok yet with your preference, and there's nothing wrong
with that. You wrote to me to get some strength and encouragement, and I
am giving it to you.
Drop a line any time.
Regards,
JM
Response, and answers:
"Had you told a number of people you liked bigger women before the article
was published?"
Yea---Everybody knew.
Everyone knows. Nobody gives a s--t.
"Once your Salon.com article was published on the website, did a lot of your friends
and co-workers read it?"
No idea. I publish so many articles---over 200 a year. I don't ask people
if they read my articles because they aren't written for anyone but
myself, and the general public, and the people who pay me for 'em!
"And if so, how were their reactions?"
A few people who know me from Dimensions wrote letters to the editor,
which are there under that Salon.com article for you to see. Some of them
know me, we've had coffee and such. Others are/were supportive strangers.
"Or did they just stand by you every step of the way?"
Don't know what that means, really. The article was written, it was
published, I moved on, and here I am!
"Has the article been published anywhere else besides the website?"
No.
"Do you plan on writing more?"
I have a book I'm writing called "Confessions of an ex-seeker" which will
include graphic details of my love for fat women and other subjects. I
also write 5 articles a week for a newspaper.
"Do you still receive replies like mine to this day?"
Every now and then, and it's always nice. Yours was nice. You seem like a
good guy. Sometimes a certain unfortunate angry and disturbed person will
be nasty on my blog, or leave a comment on my website. But he just needs
a hug. He hates that I love fat women.
"Have any of the thinner girls you've dated ever reply to you saying stuff
like, eww did you date me because you thought I was fat????"
My exes have had the decency to vanish off the face of the earth.
Description: 19 year old man, West Coast. Adores big women. His friends give him hell, his family is very health and weight conscious and also give him hell and grief. He writes: How do you stand up to 'em?
Our exchange, beginning with my response:
Hi, XXXX---
Thanks for dropping a line. You are obviously a man of taste and polish!
I told J you said hi. She is right next to me on the couch. She
says, "Tell him I said hi back!"
I anoint you, give you permission, nay, demand you live your life exactly
as you see fit.
You don't like thin women as sexual partners. You think of fat women in
the dark. You eyeball them at Starbucks, at the movies, wherever you go.
That isn't going to change until the day you die. You will never, ever be
satisfied with a thin woman no matter how beautiful, charming, witty and
sweet she may be.
That's that.
People can deal with it, or not. I do not have friends who make cracks,
about anything like the way someone looks or their weight. When I think of
my friends, I picture a group of people who are aware, enlightened,
intelligent and non-judgemental, and I can't imagine them even coming
close to a space of making a comment about someone's weight.
I also can go from a sweet, friendly, compassionate man to fury
in a split second, and people know this. I will say exactly what's on my
mind and I am not always nice about it, though I try. People do not make
many or any cracks to me, not strangers, not people I know, not my family.
You're not there yet.
No amount of shit people sling can match the feeling of putting your arms
around a nice, soft, bouncy lady with a big belly, big thighs, big butt
and a sweet smile. It's totally worth putting up with a little grief, or
dealing with it, in order to know that kind of heaven.
When I was 27, I went to live in an Indian ashram for 5 months, and did
not communicate with my family except for letters. Today, they are happy
that I am happy, and my older brother, who is a physiologist specializing
in diabetes and obesity, hasn't ever said one word about J's size. He
knows better.
You're not entirely ok yet with your preference, and there's nothing wrong
with that. You wrote to me to get some strength and encouragement, and I
am giving it to you.
Drop a line any time.
Regards,
JM
Response, and answers:
"Had you told a number of people you liked bigger women before the article
was published?"
Yea---Everybody knew.
Everyone knows. Nobody gives a s--t.
"Once your Salon.com article was published on the website, did a lot of your friends
and co-workers read it?"
No idea. I publish so many articles---over 200 a year. I don't ask people
if they read my articles because they aren't written for anyone but
myself, and the general public, and the people who pay me for 'em!
"And if so, how were their reactions?"
A few people who know me from Dimensions wrote letters to the editor,
which are there under that Salon.com article for you to see. Some of them
know me, we've had coffee and such. Others are/were supportive strangers.
"Or did they just stand by you every step of the way?"
Don't know what that means, really. The article was written, it was
published, I moved on, and here I am!
"Has the article been published anywhere else besides the website?"
No.
"Do you plan on writing more?"
I have a book I'm writing called "Confessions of an ex-seeker" which will
include graphic details of my love for fat women and other subjects. I
also write 5 articles a week for a newspaper.
"Do you still receive replies like mine to this day?"
Every now and then, and it's always nice. Yours was nice. You seem like a
good guy. Sometimes a certain unfortunate angry and disturbed person will
be nasty on my blog, or leave a comment on my website. But he just needs
a hug. He hates that I love fat women.
"Have any of the thinner girls you've dated ever reply to you saying stuff
like, eww did you date me because you thought I was fat????"
My exes have had the decency to vanish off the face of the earth.
