The Fat Morality Quiz

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Ash

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DimensionsModel
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The Fat Morality Quiz

This is for fat people only. Duh.

This quiz is designed to determine whether you're a good fatty or a bad fatty based on your behaviors and my random measurement criteria that means nothing. This quiz requires math. Take off your shoes if you need to, even though you probably can't see your feet anyway.

In each category, find the option that best describes you and add or subtract accordingly. If none of the options fit, you get 0 points for the category. Sorry, I'm really fat and probably going to die soon. I don't have time to assign point values to every possible answer.

Everyone starts with a score of 0.

Nutrition(choose one. Don't be greedy.):
Add 6 points if you eat healthily all the time.
Add 4 points if you eat healthily some of the time.
Subtract 4 points if you like junk food.
Subtract 6 points if you never met a Cheeto you didn't like (and eat.)

Exercise (choose one):
Add 6 points if you exercise all the time
Add 4 points if you exercise sometimes
Subtract 4 points if you are a couch potato.
Subtract 6 points if you are immobile.

Response to Visual Stimuli:
Study these images:
View attachment donut_bacon_burger_0.jpgView attachment 3ChocoTaco.jpg
Add 10 points if neither of these images appeal to you.
Add 5 points if one of these images appeals to you.
Subtract 5 points if you drooled a little.
Subtract 20 points if you licked your screen.
Subtract 21 points if you moaned a little WHILE licking your screen.


Choices (choose one):
Add 20 points if you got fat completely accidentally
Add 2 points if you've made a few bad choices that have made you fat.
Subtract 2 points if you've made a lot of bad choices that have made you fat.
Subtract 20 points if you got fat completely on purpose.

Diets:
Add 1 point for every diet you've been on in your life.

Transgressions:
Subtract 1 point for every cookie or bag of chips you've eaten this week.

Now tally them up. I'll give you a few minutes extra in case you need to find a calculator.

Results!
35 points and up: You are a Gold Star Fatty! You did everything right! You win the prize. How did you even get fat, anyway?

10 to 34 points : You tried your hardest, didn't you? It's okay. You're a PRETTY good fatty. Work on it.

9 points to -9 points: Eek. You're straddling the line, amigo. Shape up or ship out.

-10 points to -34 points: You are irresponsible and bad. Repent before it's too late!

-35 points and below: HORRIBLE FATTY! You are probably going to hell for this. There won't be bacon there because God loves bacon and he doesn't love you.

Post your scores if you dare!

**Disclaimer: This quiz is meant for comedic purposes only. Any resemblance to real posters, living or dead, or threads, active or locked, is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Mmmm Choco Taco.
 

mango

Mustachio Nut
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Fatty Distraction Test:




If you scrolled down to look at the above image before completing your quiz, subtract a further 2 points.


:eat2:
 

Dmitra

Drawing down the moonpie
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Bonus extra distraction: Imagine beautiful Ashley eating the tasty chocco taco . . . slowly.
 

thirtiesgirl

frumious bandersnatch
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Hmm. Not really into labeling myself as a "good" or "bad" fatty, even in fun. I'm just a fatty, ok?
 

tonynyc

Slow Dance Aficionado
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Oct 20, 2005
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Now... if this were going to be a "fair" fight ... we would have pictures of this

 

Ash

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DimensionsModel
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Yes, BPD, exactly. There's no "right" or "wrong" way to be fat.

P.S. Y'all better step off of my Choco Taco.
 

Carrie

Well-Known Member
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Choices (choose one):
Add 20 points if you got fat completely accidentally
Add 2 points if you've made a few bad choices that have made you fat.
Subtract 2 points if you've made a lot of bad choices that have made you fat.
Subtract 20 points if you got fat completely on purpose.
Um... there's no option here for fell into a chocolate river at Willy Wonka's factory and emerged fatter than the sun. Were you trying to exclude me? :mad:
 

Risible

Monkey Daze
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So how many points to put down the bag of Cheetos to do the math? That's gotta be worth somethin right there.
 
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