~FFA, SSBHM, Science Fiction, Romance A husband and wife separated by time and space struggle against an oppressive society.
[Authors Note: I originally published this story in the print anthology The Fat Man at the End of the World from bhmffaconnection.com , it was a non-exclusive contract so I am choosing to share it here as well.]
I lowered the shutter on my berth and leaned back in my chair. The 'cabin' was fairly cramped even for me, and I'm only 165lbs. Terry would have one hell of a time trying to be comfortable in one of these. It was heart wrenching to leave him behind for so long. It would only be a few weeks for me, but close to two years round trip for him. I couldn't imagine being without him for two years. Terry told me he would just keep busy with his work and it wouldn't be that hard on him. When we met it seemed like he had been alone his whole life.
I remember that day four years ago like it was yesterday.
I was in one of the larger breakrooms on the 67th floor, just about to sit down with some colleagues for lunch when I noticed him in the corner by the elevator. I'd seen him many times before, but I had never got up the nerve to introduce myself. I was hoping to find a time when I could get him alone, but there was no such thing as alone in a public place anymore. He had his computer unrolled on the table and was busy writing when I came up to him.
"Mind if I have a seat?" I asked, not sure what to expect.
"Your boyfriends over there put you up to this? What comes next? 'I want you so bad'?" he barked, picking up his computer and retracting the display and keyboard. He let them snap in like a window shade, almost breaking. "Or are you just going to cut to the chase and tell me I shouldn't eat enough for two people when we got ten billion around?" he continued, sticking the computer in his shirt pocket and heading for the elevator.
I really wanted to say something at that point, but I was choking on the words. I felt as if I'd been kicked for the hundredth time by a thirsty horse I was just trying to lead to the water trough. Every time I tried to get close to a man I was attracted to the same thing happened. I think I would have had better luck with the horse.
I was about to turn back when I noticed he left his stylus on the table. I picked it up and glanced toward the elevator. He had already boarded and was heading down.
Fortunately that particular elevator only served floors 65 through 70, so he wasn't going too far. I sprinted for the stairwell and raced down to the 65th floor. I made it just as he was getting out of the elevator. The doors shut behind him.
"You left this behind!" I said, slightly winded. I waved the stylus at him, noticing it had a few bite marks on the back end.
"I lose those all the time. What, did you come all the way down here to give it back, or is this all part of your sick joke? It's a bit funnier if your friends can see it happen instead of you just telling them it did."
"I.." I began, fighting just to get a sentence out. "I... didn't come here as a joke."
"Maybe you just wanted to say how concerned you are for my health. How I could be such a good person if I wasn't so.. fat," he said, almost spitting at the end of the sentence. I was also quite familiar with this response. "The way I choose to live is my own business. I happen to like who I am, even if nobody else does," he added as he began to walk back towards the elevator.
I stepped in front of the doors, trying to buy a few more seconds to try and let him know I wasn't the enemy. He turned toward the stairway door.
"I actually CAN walk up the stairs. The only robot I own is a security bot to keep people out," he said, going through the door.
At that point I decided subtlety wasn't an option anymore. I ducked inside the stairwell before he could start climbing the stairs. I backed him up against the corner behind the door. He had that 'Oh, what is going to happen now?' look on his face.
"I better give this back before I let you go," I said, pushing up against him and fishing the computer out of his pocket. I jabbed the stylus into the slot and stuck the computer back in his pocket. "My name is Jaquina Teranopolis, but everyone calls me JT," I said. You couldnt really tell my Cuban and Greek heritage by my appearance, but the name was a dead giveaway.
"T - Terry," he said, swallowing hard.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything weird. Well, at least not anything embarrassing," I joked. I backed off, but only just a little. "Those guys you saw me with are just co-workers, they aren't really friends. We evaluate data from probes and solar system maps to find outer solar system objects for investors," I said, hoping to prompt a similar response.
"I'm a writer," he managed to volunteer. Not much, but it was something.
"You mean you actually write things, not just edit computer output?" I asked. With most writing being done by computer these days it was kind of surprising.
"Yes, some people actually appreciate the human touch," he said.
"Yes, some do," I said, reaching down for his hand. He did not pull it away, but his fingers did not clench around my hand. He looked into my eyes, as if trying to find a reason why within them.
"Is chasing down men in the break room a habit of yours?" he asked.
"Only the good looking ones with a head on their shoulders," I said, gripping his hand a bit tighter. He still did not respond in kind. He seemed a bit put off by my statement, but eventually replied.
"You might be better off with someone more like yourself. If anyone saw you with me, you would be the one being laughed at," he said, trying to let my hand drop away. I did not loosen my grip.
"The way I choose to live is my own business," I said. "I think I heard someone say that recently," I reminded him, trying almost too hard to connect on some level. "I don't care what anyone thinks anymore. I'm not going to lay down and just take it."
"Lie, lie down and take it. You lay something else down, but when you are talking about yourself you lie down," he advised. I could feel the fingers of his hands curl up and finally grip mine.
"Whatever, I always get those mixed up," I admitted. I could feel the warmth spread from his hand. I didn't realize how much I had tensed up until I no longer felt the tension.
Breaking the ice was just the beginning, it was still an uphill battle after that.
I opened the window shutter. We would be launching soon and I didn't want to miss the view. I was paying almost as much for this flight as we did for the rock itself. Adding in the robots and equipment and our finances were stretched to the limit. My co-workers all thought I was wrong about the asteroid, so sold me their interest in shares at a fraction of what they were truly worth. This find would make us a fortune and give thousands of people a home away from the insanity of life on Earth. If I was right. I did not want to betray the trust it took me so long to build with Terry, a trust that was hard won indeed.
At first I thought Terry was just going along with me because he was afraid of what might happen if he didn't. It seemed like part of him desperately needed someone to be with, but the rest of him was hiding behind a stone wall. Whenever I tried chipping away at the wall, the troops behind it would start throwing rocks over the top. Sometimes you would just be sitting up against the wall yearning for what lies beyond it when without warning, a soldier would step out from behind it and shout a challenge at you.
It happened during one of the many lunches we had together in our building. The ground floor had one of those 'whole foods' eateries that served the closest thing to real food that could be had. The prices were exorbitant, but Terry had no qualms about paying for our lunches. I didn't realize at that time Terry made almost as much money as I did. We both got sandwiches with real bread, cheese, vegetables, and vat-grown meats.
"I just don't get what you see in me. Are you sure you wouldn't be better off with someone else?" Terry asked completely out of the hazy gray. There were times when I just wanted him near me, and there were times when I just wanted to kick him in the head. This situation was calling for the latter. I flopped my sandwich back down on the plate and let out a heavy sigh.
"Can't you just accept the fact that I like to be with you? For someone who says they are comfortable with who they are you sure don't act like it sometimes." I really shouldn't have turned it back on him like this, but I was tired of being made to feel like there was something wrong with me.
"I'm just asking why, that's all. Can't you just give me a reason?" He asked. Of all the challenges the soldiers from behind the wall presented to me, this was their favorite.
No. I couldn't just come out with a reason, not while the soldier was pointing his gun at me and demanding an answer. Terry was the one who could drag words out of his heart whenever the need arose. Often I would just get shot down anyway and go off to tend to my wounds.
Man of words, woman of science. I could do more than calculate, I could feel just like any other woman. I just couldn't put it into words. I didn't know how to tell him that his body made me feel like I was some sort of goddess, swimming in the overwhelming essence that was man. Nor could I explain how I could feel the warmth that poured from his soul into me when I looked into his eyes and peered over the wall. Sometimes I felt like I was on the other side of that wall, sheltered from the hectic life beyond.
There were times when I could just FEEL that he thought he was just living in my shadow. Every time I got a bonus from a big find, every time I entered into some side project until the next big rock came along, and every time I studied up on the latest probe technology I could feel it. He never really came out and said it, but I knew that is what he felt. I could never find the words to let him know that it was his strength and love that drove me to keep testing myself. I didn't know how to tell him that it was ME that was trying to prove myself worthy of him.
The cabin display advised everyone to strap in for the launch countdown. Launches along the equatorial accelerator were known to be pretty rough. They wanted to get as much speed as possible while still under power supplied on Earth.
The ship with the robots and equipment was already launched during the previous window months ago. It would reach the asteroid and deploy the robots long before humans could reach it. There was a limit to the acceleration people could tolerate, even with dampening fields in place. There was no such limit for the robots and equipment.
There was a half an hour until launch, so I took the chance to unroll my computer. It synched with the ship's internal network. Even though we had not launched yet, communications had been shifted over to the particle pair link. There would be time before launch for live text until the time dilation made real-time communication impossible. The communication offered was no-frills text chat and email, along with the occasional obnoxious ad blurb. Particle pair bandwidth was a precious commodity. I could see Terry was logged in and waiting for me.
[Authors Note: I originally published this story in the print anthology The Fat Man at the End of the World from bhmffaconnection.com , it was a non-exclusive contract so I am choosing to share it here as well.]
I lowered the shutter on my berth and leaned back in my chair. The 'cabin' was fairly cramped even for me, and I'm only 165lbs. Terry would have one hell of a time trying to be comfortable in one of these. It was heart wrenching to leave him behind for so long. It would only be a few weeks for me, but close to two years round trip for him. I couldn't imagine being without him for two years. Terry told me he would just keep busy with his work and it wouldn't be that hard on him. When we met it seemed like he had been alone his whole life.
I remember that day four years ago like it was yesterday.
I was in one of the larger breakrooms on the 67th floor, just about to sit down with some colleagues for lunch when I noticed him in the corner by the elevator. I'd seen him many times before, but I had never got up the nerve to introduce myself. I was hoping to find a time when I could get him alone, but there was no such thing as alone in a public place anymore. He had his computer unrolled on the table and was busy writing when I came up to him.
"Mind if I have a seat?" I asked, not sure what to expect.
"Your boyfriends over there put you up to this? What comes next? 'I want you so bad'?" he barked, picking up his computer and retracting the display and keyboard. He let them snap in like a window shade, almost breaking. "Or are you just going to cut to the chase and tell me I shouldn't eat enough for two people when we got ten billion around?" he continued, sticking the computer in his shirt pocket and heading for the elevator.
I really wanted to say something at that point, but I was choking on the words. I felt as if I'd been kicked for the hundredth time by a thirsty horse I was just trying to lead to the water trough. Every time I tried to get close to a man I was attracted to the same thing happened. I think I would have had better luck with the horse.
I was about to turn back when I noticed he left his stylus on the table. I picked it up and glanced toward the elevator. He had already boarded and was heading down.
Fortunately that particular elevator only served floors 65 through 70, so he wasn't going too far. I sprinted for the stairwell and raced down to the 65th floor. I made it just as he was getting out of the elevator. The doors shut behind him.
"You left this behind!" I said, slightly winded. I waved the stylus at him, noticing it had a few bite marks on the back end.
"I lose those all the time. What, did you come all the way down here to give it back, or is this all part of your sick joke? It's a bit funnier if your friends can see it happen instead of you just telling them it did."
"I.." I began, fighting just to get a sentence out. "I... didn't come here as a joke."
"Maybe you just wanted to say how concerned you are for my health. How I could be such a good person if I wasn't so.. fat," he said, almost spitting at the end of the sentence. I was also quite familiar with this response. "The way I choose to live is my own business. I happen to like who I am, even if nobody else does," he added as he began to walk back towards the elevator.
I stepped in front of the doors, trying to buy a few more seconds to try and let him know I wasn't the enemy. He turned toward the stairway door.
"I actually CAN walk up the stairs. The only robot I own is a security bot to keep people out," he said, going through the door.
At that point I decided subtlety wasn't an option anymore. I ducked inside the stairwell before he could start climbing the stairs. I backed him up against the corner behind the door. He had that 'Oh, what is going to happen now?' look on his face.
"I better give this back before I let you go," I said, pushing up against him and fishing the computer out of his pocket. I jabbed the stylus into the slot and stuck the computer back in his pocket. "My name is Jaquina Teranopolis, but everyone calls me JT," I said. You couldnt really tell my Cuban and Greek heritage by my appearance, but the name was a dead giveaway.
"T - Terry," he said, swallowing hard.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything weird. Well, at least not anything embarrassing," I joked. I backed off, but only just a little. "Those guys you saw me with are just co-workers, they aren't really friends. We evaluate data from probes and solar system maps to find outer solar system objects for investors," I said, hoping to prompt a similar response.
"I'm a writer," he managed to volunteer. Not much, but it was something.
"You mean you actually write things, not just edit computer output?" I asked. With most writing being done by computer these days it was kind of surprising.
"Yes, some people actually appreciate the human touch," he said.
"Yes, some do," I said, reaching down for his hand. He did not pull it away, but his fingers did not clench around my hand. He looked into my eyes, as if trying to find a reason why within them.
"Is chasing down men in the break room a habit of yours?" he asked.
"Only the good looking ones with a head on their shoulders," I said, gripping his hand a bit tighter. He still did not respond in kind. He seemed a bit put off by my statement, but eventually replied.
"You might be better off with someone more like yourself. If anyone saw you with me, you would be the one being laughed at," he said, trying to let my hand drop away. I did not loosen my grip.
"The way I choose to live is my own business," I said. "I think I heard someone say that recently," I reminded him, trying almost too hard to connect on some level. "I don't care what anyone thinks anymore. I'm not going to lay down and just take it."
"Lie, lie down and take it. You lay something else down, but when you are talking about yourself you lie down," he advised. I could feel the fingers of his hands curl up and finally grip mine.
"Whatever, I always get those mixed up," I admitted. I could feel the warmth spread from his hand. I didn't realize how much I had tensed up until I no longer felt the tension.
Breaking the ice was just the beginning, it was still an uphill battle after that.
I opened the window shutter. We would be launching soon and I didn't want to miss the view. I was paying almost as much for this flight as we did for the rock itself. Adding in the robots and equipment and our finances were stretched to the limit. My co-workers all thought I was wrong about the asteroid, so sold me their interest in shares at a fraction of what they were truly worth. This find would make us a fortune and give thousands of people a home away from the insanity of life on Earth. If I was right. I did not want to betray the trust it took me so long to build with Terry, a trust that was hard won indeed.
At first I thought Terry was just going along with me because he was afraid of what might happen if he didn't. It seemed like part of him desperately needed someone to be with, but the rest of him was hiding behind a stone wall. Whenever I tried chipping away at the wall, the troops behind it would start throwing rocks over the top. Sometimes you would just be sitting up against the wall yearning for what lies beyond it when without warning, a soldier would step out from behind it and shout a challenge at you.
It happened during one of the many lunches we had together in our building. The ground floor had one of those 'whole foods' eateries that served the closest thing to real food that could be had. The prices were exorbitant, but Terry had no qualms about paying for our lunches. I didn't realize at that time Terry made almost as much money as I did. We both got sandwiches with real bread, cheese, vegetables, and vat-grown meats.
"I just don't get what you see in me. Are you sure you wouldn't be better off with someone else?" Terry asked completely out of the hazy gray. There were times when I just wanted him near me, and there were times when I just wanted to kick him in the head. This situation was calling for the latter. I flopped my sandwich back down on the plate and let out a heavy sigh.
"Can't you just accept the fact that I like to be with you? For someone who says they are comfortable with who they are you sure don't act like it sometimes." I really shouldn't have turned it back on him like this, but I was tired of being made to feel like there was something wrong with me.
"I'm just asking why, that's all. Can't you just give me a reason?" He asked. Of all the challenges the soldiers from behind the wall presented to me, this was their favorite.
No. I couldn't just come out with a reason, not while the soldier was pointing his gun at me and demanding an answer. Terry was the one who could drag words out of his heart whenever the need arose. Often I would just get shot down anyway and go off to tend to my wounds.
Man of words, woman of science. I could do more than calculate, I could feel just like any other woman. I just couldn't put it into words. I didn't know how to tell him that his body made me feel like I was some sort of goddess, swimming in the overwhelming essence that was man. Nor could I explain how I could feel the warmth that poured from his soul into me when I looked into his eyes and peered over the wall. Sometimes I felt like I was on the other side of that wall, sheltered from the hectic life beyond.
There were times when I could just FEEL that he thought he was just living in my shadow. Every time I got a bonus from a big find, every time I entered into some side project until the next big rock came along, and every time I studied up on the latest probe technology I could feel it. He never really came out and said it, but I knew that is what he felt. I could never find the words to let him know that it was his strength and love that drove me to keep testing myself. I didn't know how to tell him that it was ME that was trying to prove myself worthy of him.
The cabin display advised everyone to strap in for the launch countdown. Launches along the equatorial accelerator were known to be pretty rough. They wanted to get as much speed as possible while still under power supplied on Earth.
The ship with the robots and equipment was already launched during the previous window months ago. It would reach the asteroid and deploy the robots long before humans could reach it. There was a limit to the acceleration people could tolerate, even with dampening fields in place. There was no such limit for the robots and equipment.
There was a half an hour until launch, so I took the chance to unroll my computer. It synched with the ship's internal network. Even though we had not launched yet, communications had been shifted over to the particle pair link. There would be time before launch for live text until the time dilation made real-time communication impossible. The communication offered was no-frills text chat and email, along with the occasional obnoxious ad blurb. Particle pair bandwidth was a precious commodity. I could see Terry was logged in and waiting for me.
