700 lb woman wants to weigh 1000 lbs

[loopytheone]

Also, whilst you are all entitled to have strong opinions and voice them, please bear in mind that this is a site that is accepting and inclusive towards members of the feederism community. All communities have their bad apples but making blanket statements about entire demographics of people isn't fair or helpful.

Just because you don't understand/experience a certain kink, doesn't make it inherently bad or wrong. Things that go on between consenting adults are their own choices and your kinks don't determined whether or not you are a good person. Kindness, communication and honesty are the most important aspects of kink relationship with someone. People who lie, manipulate and abuse are trash and not worth the ground they walk on, but you get people like that in all areas of life.

Also, bear in mind that people who are into feederism can't exactly help it, anymore than people can help being attracted to men, women, fat people, brunettes etc etc. Practising these things safely and with the full consent of the other party is always the best way to explore these things. The world would be a very boring place if everybody liked the same things and nobody ever wanted to try anything kinky.

 

[mathfa]

Please keep in mind; people relatively new to the site peruse the posts, often without regard to the age of said posts. They are excited and interested in what people have said and shouldn't be faulted for that.

Heck, even those of us who have been here for a little while liek to go back and read old posts. That's why forums > chatrooms, because the information lasts "forever".


But I agree with Loopy's take. I think there are definitely a lot of bad eggs among feeders, but if everything is constantly consensual, then it's not an immoral thing or wrong at. However, if it severely affects one's quality of life and they still pursue it, then I feel like maybe seeking help is the best. Even if consent is involved.

 

[Donna]

I’m going to get out a stick and beat on this long dead horse because, well, I’ve been known to shoot my mouth off.

In all seriousness, I’ve thought about this subject a great deal over my years at Dimensions. It’s been debated and fought over ad nauseum. I have to admit that I’ve mostly had a negative judgment of intentional weight gain. As a super-size person,I’ve gained weight over the years without intentionally doing so. PTSD, a wicked sweet-tooth, and a sedentary lifestyle combined with yo-yo dieting from a time before I started kindergarten (My Mom put me on my first diet when I was five.) caused my weight to steadily increase. I stopped dieting years ago and theoretically my weight should have leveled off. It didn’t.

I have RA and Fibromyalgia, plus an old hip injury from my teens and those three things combined with the aforementioned PTSD increased cortisol production, my penchant for sweets, and a sedentary lifestyle started robbing me of my mobility. So, in the fall of 2019 I was barely mobile when I went into septic shock and spent ten days in a coma and more than two weeks off my feet, I became bedridden. I spent two and half months in hospital, an additional two months in rehab without regaining my ability to walk. I still can’t walk now.

The concept of consensual feeding/gaining to the point of immobility can be a strong sexual drive for some people. I get that. I have my own set of kinks that others might bristle at, so I don’t want to judge and disparage anyone’s fantasies. But I have to wonder, considering my reality, shouldn’t some sexual fantasies be kept as fantasies only and not put into real world practice? At the least, perhaps those engaging in intentional weight gain and feederism should know the real world consequences of what they are choosing?

That’s my two cents on the subject. I hope I don’t regret sharing this.

 

[GordoNegro]

I’m going to get out a stick and beat on this long dead horse because, well, I’ve been known to shoot my mouth off.

In all seriousness, I’ve thought about this subject a great deal over my years at Dimensions. It’s been debated and fought over ad nauseum. I have to admit that I’ve mostly had a negative judgment of intentional weight gain. As a super-size person,I’ve gained weight over the years without intentionally doing so. PTSD, a wicked sweet-tooth, and a sedentary lifestyle combined with yo-yo dieting from a time before I started kindergarten (My Mom put me on my first diet when I was five.) caused my weight to steadily increase. I stopped dieting years ago and theoretically my weight should have leveled off. It didn’t.

I have RA and Fibromyalgia, plus an old hip injury from my teens and those three things combined with the aforementioned PTSD increased cortisol production, my penchant for sweets, and a sedentary lifestyle started robbing me of my mobility. So, in the fall of 2019 I was barely mobile when I went into septic shock and spent ten days in a coma and more than two weeks off my feet, I became bedridden. I spent two and half months in hospital, an additional two months in rehab without regaining my ability to walk. I still can’t walk now.

The concept of consensual feeding/gaining to the point of immobility is be a strong sexual drive for some people. I get that. I have my own set of kinks that others might bristle at, so I don’t want to judge and disparage anyone’s fantasies. But I have to wonder, considering my reality, shouldn’t some sexual fantasies be kept as fantasies only and not put into real world practice? At the least, perhaps those engaging in intentional weight gain and feederism should know the real world consequences of what they are choosing?

That’s my two cents on the subject. I hope I don’t regret sharing this.

Rather people speak their truths (regardless) than to be silenced. Those who opt for lifestyle change/kink should truly know what factors are out there so they can truly make decisions they can accept or decide not to.

In the Fat Girls & Feeders documentary Model Teighlor stated her regrets as she had to rely on family while her feeder bailed. The documentary also had Mark & Gina as Mark left his job to assist wife Gina full time as he designed their home to be more accessible for her needs.

To be honest, I miss 27 years ago when it was more taboo; as those who were into it appeared more genuine to me, because of the stigma that was attached, while still being/choosing to take part. Some people do keep it as fantasies and look for feeder red-flags or tendencies as signs to just cut them off or be friends. On the flip side, I do hope more people in general don't use kink/tease lifestyle changes in order to not be alone, as that doesn't work out too well long term either.

 

[Tattoocharlie]

My girlfriend and I have discussed this. She has some of the medical issues you have. She had back surgery and was bed ridden for six months. This was before I met her. She had no one to cook for her and gained 80 pounds. She is still mobile but getting dangerously close to loosing that. As a fantasy it is amazing but as a reality neither of us want that as it causes her too much pain. Also I love taking her places, trying new things and showing her off. Also I want her to be around for a long time as I do dearly love her.

The bottom line is I'm in love with her for who she is not how much she ways. The fact that I think she's the most beautiful women I've ever saw is just a bonus

 

[TwoSwords]

It's been literal years since I commented on this topic. I wouldn't be making this comment if I still believed most of the things people tell me online, and I still think there are extremes that it's best not to reach for if you can't handle it. Apart from that, however, I think it's gross how some people who've lived their lives, trapped in a condition that they don't want to be in at all, suffering and unable to escape from the limits of their body, can then turn around and say that hundreds, if not thousands of other people should resign themselves to a helpless fate in the same way, as long as it's the opposite fate as theirs.

I was thin once. I hated it. I don't want to be thin. I detest being thin. I'd rather *die* than be thin. You have the freedom to say whatever you want by way of advice to me, and I have the freedom to tell you I think it's gross.

I remember one of my first jobs, so many people complained about failing to lose weight, and I was so angry I could barely speak; not at them, but at how hard it was for me to gain, and how much I wanted what they had, and could never have it. I get how people can have great blessings, but not the ones they want, and it's not wrong for them to be discontented with that, but you simply cannot know the extent to which others crave the very things you don't seem to want them to have. You don't hear it from us often, because we recognize and respect that you're not happy with living our dreams. But if you're going to disparage our dreams because of it, you'd best be prepared for some pushback.

 

[Donna]

And, now I regret adding my two cents, ironically for a different reason than I thought I might regret.

I thought I was being very careful when I was choosing my language as to not insult and to be respectful of those who wish for intentional gain. After reading your post, I see I failed and for that I sincerely apologize. I did not intend to disparage you or anyone.

I did acknowledge and I reiterate now that I believe the desire to gain weight is a very strong sexual desire. It obviously goes even deeper than that, especially for you. I asked the question if the fantasy (or maybe a better word would be impulse??) to intentionally gain weight should be kept at the fantasy level only. It has been pointed out to me privately that by asking this question, I was indeed pass a moral judgment. Again, my apologies.

And without going into detail, the person who pointed out my less than tactful question did say NO, because that denies those with the impulse their right to expression. As you stated. I was indeed projecting my own regret over the unfortunate outcome of my unintentional weight gain.

As I am typing this message a thought occurred to me. As a very fat person, I have been the subject of body shaming all my life. I have fought hard to work against the negative judgments of others. But I cannot be a fat activist and believe whole heartedly in the fight to remove weight stigma, unless I also acknowledge and fight for those on the other end of the spectrum from me. Those like you, who desperately want to gain and are possibly dealing with shaming of their own for being thin.

Can we agree that everyone has the right to enact their fantasy with the qualifier that the effects of both extremes (weight loss or weight gain, either leading to illness) need to be considered?

 

[TwoSwords]

Can we agree that everyone has the right to enact their fantasy with the qualifier that the effects of both extremes (weight loss or weight gain, either leading to illness) need to be considered?

I can't speak for everyone, but for my part, I can definitely agree with that. I would never want anyone to make a badly-informed decision of any kind, so long as it's their decision to make.

Also, yes. For me, this goes beyond sex, beyond mere emotion or even satisfaction as a whole. The idea of me being thin feels unsettling to me on a psychological (even perhaps moral) level. I felt constantly needy when I was thin, and since leaving that condition behind, I feel I can provide for my own psychological and emotional needs without help. It's made me more of a self-sufficient person, with an easier time focusing on the tasks I'm given, because I'm not being constantly distracted by my the limits of my body. They do still exist, of course, and I'm not saying I wouldn't like to gain a little more, but I'm at a place right now where I feel I can like my life and work on treating others right. That's my situation. I'm just not going to assume that other people are bound by that. Much of that is just my own experiences.

 

[GordoNegro]

And, now I regret adding my two cents, ironically for a different reason than I thought I might regret.

I thought I was being very careful when I was choosing my language as to not insult and to be respectful of those who wish for intentional gain. After reading your post, I see I failed and for that I sincerely apologize. I did not intend to disparage you or anyone.

I did acknowledge and I reiterate now that I believe the desire to gain weight is a very strong sexual desire. It obviously goes even deeper than that, especially for you. I asked the question if the fantasy (or maybe a better word would be impulse??) to intentionally gain weight should be kept at the fantasy level only. It has been pointed out to me privately that by asking this question, I was indeed pass a moral judgment. Again, my apologies.

And without going into detail, the person who pointed out my less than tactful question did say NO, because that denies those with the impulse their right to expression. As you stated. I was indeed projecting my own regret over the unfortunate outcome of my unintentional weight gain.

As I am typing this message a thought occurred to me. As a very fat person, I have been the subject of body shaming all my life. I have fought hard to work against the negative judgments of others. But I cannot be a fat activist and believe whole heartedly in the fight to remove weight stigma, unless I also acknowledge and fight for those on the other end of the spectrum from me. Those like you, who desperately want to gain and are possibly dealing with shaming of their own for being thin.

Can we agree that everyone has the right to enact their fantasy with the qualifier that the effects of both extremes (weight loss or weight gain, either leading to illness) need to be considered?

I don't think you need to apologize for an honest question and speaking your truth. You have a genuine concern for those who choose or at the point where bodies start to break. I'd rather hear you voice on the side of caution speaking out of regret; than the social media tongue lashing from some webmodels who experience same but demand tips in return from a lifestyle that demanded more $ than the $ they make in profit.

 

[TwoSwords]

I don't think you need to apologize for an honest question and speaking your truth. You have a genuine concern for those who choose or at the point where bodies start to break. I'd rather hear you voice on the side of caution speaking out of regret; than the social media tongue lashing from some webmodels who experience same but demand tips in return from a lifestyle that demanded more $ than the $ they make in profit.

Actually, I've been thinking over the contents of post #63, and I think what made me feel upset about it was that it used the terms "intentional weight gain" and "feederism" to signify something extreme. Neither one necessarily is. If a person has been sick, and they deliberately eat a little more to regain some of their lost weight, that's "intentional weight gain." If someone else makes a sandwich and gives it to you to eat, that loosely qualifies as "feederism." The problem isn't with these things, but just with people leaping before they look, and taking things to an extreme they're not ready for.

Also, no one person's experience provides a general rule for all people to follow. Who they are or what they've gone through have no effect on that, because people are not equal samples. Induction does not work that way.

You're right, though. No one needs to apologize for asking a question, and it's possible I extrapolated more from that question than was intended by it. I've very wary about people who seem to be trying to inject a psychological longing for thinness into discussions that I've been a part of, and it's possible that, in this case, I saw an adversary that wasn't there.

 

[GordoNegro]

Actually, I've been thinking over the contents of post #63, and I think what made me feel upset about it was that it used the terms "intentional weight gain" and "feederism" to signify something extreme. Neither one necessarily is. If a person has been sick, and they deliberately eat a little more to regain some of their lost weight, that's "intentional weight gain." If someone else makes a sandwich and gives it to you to eat, that loosely qualifies as "feederism." The problem isn't with these things, but just with people leaping before they look, and taking things to an extreme they're not ready for.

Also, no one person's experience provides a general rule for all people to follow. Who they are or what they've gone through have no effect on that, because people are not equal samples. Induction does not work that way.

You're right, though. No one needs to apologize for asking a question, and it's possible I extrapolated more from that question than was intended by it. I've very wary about people who seem to be trying to inject a psychological longing for thinness into discussions that I've been a part of, and it's possible that, in this case, I saw an adversary that wasn't there.

Tbh, on this forum and elsewhere "intentional weight gain" and "feederism" in general kind of leans to the more extreme cases. Yes, there are people here and elsewhere who have battled with anorexia/body dysmorphia, though appear to be pale in # to those who have the desire to take it there. There are some who only dabble on the weekends with the occasional 5-15lbs; don't want to get lumped with those who are disabled/housebound etc, but still falls under the same umbrella. Difference now and 25-30 yrs ago is that you can casually discuss it on a 2nd/3rd date and not endure the stigma and shame/ostracized that's associated with it.

Truth is that we can all learn from Donna, Teighlor, Mark-Gina's and others' experiences as the hardship, stigmas, isolation and other factors still exist today. The good thing about today is that for those who do have a psychological longing for thinness or be seen as desired according to Western Civilization standards, there are options more accessible than before. Yes, there are some former fatties who look at fat people with disdain and ire..though the positive is agreeing to disagree and live around those who don't feel that venom towards you.

 

[TwoSwords]

Tbh, on this forum and elsewhere "intentional weight gain" and "feederism" in general kind of leans to the more extreme cases. Yes, there are people here and elsewhere who have battled with anorexia/body dysmorphia, though appear to be pale in # to those who have the desire to take it there. There are some who only dabble on the weekends with the occasional 5-15lbs; don't want to get lumped with those who are disabled/housebound etc, but still falls under the same umbrella. Difference now and 25-30 yrs ago is that you can casually discuss it on a 2nd/3rd date and not endure the stigma and shame/ostracized that's associated with it.

Truth is that we can all learn from Donna, Teighlor, Mark-Gina's and others' experiences as the hardship, stigmas, isolation and other factors still exist today. The good thing about today is that for those who do have a psychological longing for thinness or be seen as desired according to Western Civilization standards, there are options more accessible than before. Yes, there are some former fatties who look at fat people with disdain and ire..though the positive is agreeing to disagree and live around those who don't feel that venom towards you.

Given how fast and wildly things are changing in the world, I don't feel I can afford to be that laid back about it. I'm very guarded against people who think they can tell me anything about what my weight "should" be, and I've been given every reason in the world to be so guarded. If you think you can learn something additional from someone else's experiences, I'm not about to tell you you can't, but nobody; absolutely nobody tells me what to learn and from who. They've never lived my life or endured my struggles, and they have no right to try to push me into a line of reasoning that is, in my view, faulty and poisonous.

Also, I'm not budging an inch on the definition of terms I presented in my last post. If lots of people use them to imply extreme cases only, then lots of people are using them incorrectly, as no such implication is contained within those words. To suggest otherwise is to fall victim to the Bandwagon Fallacy (Argumentum Ad Populum.)

 

[Bloatedashleypiggy]

Well, maybe she's just got a different way of metabolizing/storing that fat.

I think maybe she got her story of fat