southernfa
Well-Known Member
As I noted on the Domestic Violence thread, there are some things in my past that still get on my goat. To put it mildly.
For years this bothered me. I found it very difficult to forgive and forget, especially when the poor behaviour was (and remains) ongoing, and rather beat myself up about it.
Last year I went along to a talk on forgiveness and the speaker waxed long and lyrical about it's curative powers and I slunk lower and and lower in my seat. But then, when questioned, he took the position that there can be no forgiveness where there is no genuine apology or contrition. There is literally nothing to forgive, no possibility or grounds for a genuine reconciliation.
That made sense to me and I sat up again. So these days, I don't worry too much about forgiveness, since those people have no intention of changing, and simply get on with my life and keep them out of it as much as possible.
But I am curious. What do you think? Is it possible to find forgiveness without there being contrition?
For years this bothered me. I found it very difficult to forgive and forget, especially when the poor behaviour was (and remains) ongoing, and rather beat myself up about it.
Last year I went along to a talk on forgiveness and the speaker waxed long and lyrical about it's curative powers and I slunk lower and and lower in my seat. But then, when questioned, he took the position that there can be no forgiveness where there is no genuine apology or contrition. There is literally nothing to forgive, no possibility or grounds for a genuine reconciliation.
That made sense to me and I sat up again. So these days, I don't worry too much about forgiveness, since those people have no intention of changing, and simply get on with my life and keep them out of it as much as possible.
But I am curious. What do you think? Is it possible to find forgiveness without there being contrition?
