Secret Eater?

[Iamaunicorn]

I have this issue where I am embarrassed to eat in front of people. For some reason I feel that as a fat person I should not eat in front of others. I know that this is entirely fucked up and makes absolutely no sense but I will say "I'm not hungry" when I am out with a group of people/coworkers. I have to feel very very comfortable with people before I will eat in front of them. I have no idea where this stems from but I have become somewhat of a secret eater. I will literally wait until I get home just so that I can eat alone and not feel judged. As odd as it sounds I am starting to think that the first part of accepting and loving myself is eating in front of others and not feeling embarrassed or apologetic. Like instead of forcing myself to order a salad so that I can be the "acceptable fat girl who's trying to lose weight" if I want a burger I should just order the damn burger and feel ok about it. I think it's odd how many emotions I associate with food. What human being should feel guilty or ashamed about eating?

Do any of you have this issue or is it just me? How much therapy do you think I need? LOL

 

[Dmitra]

 

[ecogeek]

 

[loopytheone]

 

[Iamaunicorn]

 

[oceanmachine]

 

[katherine22]

 

[CarlaSixx]