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I'm terrified.

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ChubbyPuppy

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Dec 25, 2009
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Ok, I'm posting here because I don't know where else to turn. My boyfriend who I adore and am very very attracted to is having health problems which are clearly exacerbated by his weight. I'm of course worried for him and I want him to lose weight so he can be healthy and enjoy a long life if that is what it takes, despite my fears regarding that...

I feel like either he won't want me anymore once he's skinny and has his pick of skinny girls, probably unfounded since there are plenty of guys who really do love fat girls but I still can't get the thought out of my head... I'm also afraid that no matter how much I love him, I just won't be attracted to him any more and it will ruin our (going on 3 years) relationship. I've dated thin guys before, but I was never as happy with them. I feel really shallow and hate myself over this...

but my worst fear in this whole situation is because he's decided to have a sleeve gastrectomy. I've seen what his mom went through after having her weight loss surgery- the pain and suffering, hair falling out from malnutrition, not being able to keep any food down except soup, etc. and I don't want him to make a decision that will make the rest of his life hell, or possibly kill him on the operating table.

I just don't know what to do, I don't know what kind of response I'm looking for here, nobody will probably read this anyway. I just really needed to get my thoughts out somewhere. I barely slept last night after going to the doctor with him and finding out exactly how bad his health is. I feel so guilty for being attracted to him, like what if it's my fault he hasn't been able to lose weight the safe way?

I'm obviously a bad person one way or another. :(
 

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