Squeezablysoft's Sweetly Spicy and Scrumptiously Saucy She Shed

[squeezablysoft]

Thursday 07/01/2021: Another rough day, still holding it together.
#depression
#dailyselfie

 

[squeezablysoft]

Friday 07/02/2021:Today is my older biological half-brother's birthday. We haven't seen each other in person since I was 1 and he was 3 and we don't have much of a relationship but we do follow each other on Insta so I left him a quick happy birthday. He turns 39 today, I guess we're all getting old now.
#dailyselfie
#happybirthdaybrother

 

[squeezablysoft]

Saturday 07/03/2021: My mom has been very sick for a long time but she really took a bad turn late last night and ended up in the hospital. I didn't get a pic today since it's been crazy busy getting updates from the hospital and trying to find care for myself as well.
#dailyselfie
#nottoday

 

[JBfromNH]

I know the feeling. Hang in there and take care of yourself

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

Unless you’re 7 ft tall, no ones body wants to weigh 315 lbs. it just doesn’t and no amount of pseudoscience is going to make that statement true. There’s so many different variables but off the top of my head, I bet if your diet was structured in a way that you covered your macronutrient needs in a more nutritious way, you’d likely have a hard time eating enough to get to that 3,000 kcal mark. You could, but it would take way more food than you think. If you’re eating calorically dense food with little nutritional value then no, it’s not hard to bang 3,000 kcals in a day but when it’s things like grilled chicken, lean steak, broccoli, rice, sweet potatoes sans butter and brown sugar it’s much harder.

But don’t get me wrong, by all means if you want to weigh that then go for it. I myself walk around at 320 and I’m pretty content. And it takes me at my activity level around 4,000-4,300 kcals a day to maintain this body weight.

There is some merit to the set point theory and not all people operate optimally at a low body fat. But to think a body that is say for instance 5’7 or so “wants” to be 315 lbs. as an optimal body weight is highly spurious.

Empty Calories is the easy way of consumming a lot but if you go fat free diet the body will fatten up on a lot less calories.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

Great resolution. I hope others see and follow your example.
This is a community and we should be more active and interested in what others are doing.
I'm going to try to follow your rule - 3 posts daily - and other resolutions are:
1. Stay the course, continue letting myself gain. I like being big and would like to get to 400 or more.
2. Try to be friendlier to others. Even when people are mean, they probably just don't understand.
3. Encourage others to be happy and, when possible, indulge - I think bigger, softer people are happier! lol
4. Try my best to be a better person. That's an all encompassing requirement.

This can be dangerous due to being hollow. Children Tag building etc because they feel invisible. They are invisible because they are not in lives of the physical world. Look for physical contact as well as this hyperspace connection.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

Yup, any advice for my first time?

Anti Depressants are not a long term or healthy solution. Your physical world affects your emotional world. Depression is bottoming out due to a lack of sentient needs being fulfilled. To shake up your emotional state you need to shake your physical world. Activities.

You are wheel chair bound, which is limiting but so is being scared of heights. Get out of your comfort zone. The comfort zone is putting your physical world in a rut. This can only put your emotional world in a rut. This is denying you the sentient need to succeed/have successes at things.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

So I've been taking the Cymbalta for about 3 months now. I had 1 really good day but other than that it doesn't seem to be helping even though they upped my dose 3 times.

It's hard to tell though what is just a normal reaction to all the stuff going on in the world and in my life right now vs what's actually mental illness symptoms. It doesn't help either that my mom doesn't understand depression or even believe it's a real thing. So instead of trying to help and comfort me she just makes me feel worse about everything especially myself.

I'm calling my doctor on Monday to get my medication changed. But I'm not feeling really hopeful about it and honestly think I'm going to end up having to go to a mental hospital, which will totally freak mom out.

Anyway if it's ok to do here I'm putting a link to the GoFundMe page I set up for mine and my mom's medical needs. I tried to put it in my signature but I can't figure out how to make it show up.

Family with Multiple Disabilities organized by Davia Withers

Hi there! 8-)My name is Davia Withers and I am starting this campaign to raise money f… Davia Withers needs your support for Family with Multiple Disabilities

www.gofundme.com

Depression is mental illness. A mental illness is a state of mind that prevents you from living your life. The way out of it is to start living your life. You will not be able to do that alone; it requires someone to drag you into activities and at the end of the activity take notice of how it disrupted you depression. The more you disrupt it the less it becomes your life/existence.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

A sentient need you appear to be missing causes depression is that you are lacking a sense of HOPE. Building up successes at activities will change this.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

New video for Easter!

I
I like your food groups. Crunchy, chewy and by the way processed fruit does not count as fruit.

Protein, Minerals, Vitamins, Fibre etc.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

Day 4 of #dailyselfie because if you've never taken a mask selfie, have you even lived during the #2020plague?
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Day 4 of #dailyselfie because if you've never taken a mask selfie, have you even lived during the #2020plague?
View attachment 137706

No I have not been through the plague. As a Kiwi (New Zealander) we were ignorant of the plague and did let it in. It got into a nursing home and the first death was mistaken for common cold. Then it was upgrades to pneumonia and after the quick death was diagnosed as the plague.


New Zealand went into a HARD Lockdown. It lasted 5 weeks as a target of 21 days of no community spreading had to be established. Then we went down levels until it was decided it was safe, about another 8 weeks. As a result of the initial exposure this country suffered 25 deaths and 2,500 infected.


We have had scares at the boarder but it has been kept out, this as made us complacent, which means vulnerable.


Fiji was also plague free and I suspect it was people smuggling that got them contaminated. It is wiping them out like previous plagues like Scarlet Fever and Small Pox.


We should all be vaccinated by 2022.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

This picture does kinda have that "mad genius" vibe lol.

The answer is simple. Greed and idolising the wealthy.
the loss of parenting skills.
Nuclear families instead of extended families preventing wisdom of others mistakes correct paths.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

Day 18: So today my mom commented on how my mouth always turns down and she was like "Don't do that, you're a pretty girl and it ruins your face when you do that". I suppose it never occurred to her that her fat-shaming me like she was doing again last night might not exactly make me more smiley. But anyway, I tried to smile a little in this picture. I'm still too embarrassed about my awful teeth to take a full smile pic but I'm doing this #dailyselfie project to try to honestly depict what life with depression is like so I guess that's just another part of it.
View attachment 137904

Her expression of you doing a wrong thing is wrongfully applied. The problem often is that they do not know how to get you out of the mess your life has become.


Being fat is a choice and often done in a self-destructive act. Sometimes it is done from desire to try it out. A lot of the time it occurs through body malfunction.


I have a 53-inch (134 centimetres) waist and in kilos I am a lot. I read articles written by weight gainers stating how much they eat to be there weight of 120 kilograms. I compared it to my food list and I was one tenth of their list and considerably heavier. I made a big mistake and cut fat out of my diet and ballooned to my size.


My weight gain was caused by a fungus, which has taken hold. I am killing infections trying to find the cure of the fungus. I smashed it with a frequency of orange light and a laser. I lost 6 kilos in 2 weeks. I pig out eating forbidden foods.

 

[NZ Mountain Man]

Depression is a bad disease. I've been living with it, at it's worst, the past 10/15 yrs. You just have to keep on your meds, and tell yourself every morning, that "I'm gonna do better today".

There are so many simple steps to climb out of the depression pit and none of them come from a pill bottle. The sad news is tat you cannot do it own your own.

Get out of your emotional rut by addressing issues that are sucking out your sense of self-worth, self-esteem, hope and living in a ‘comfort place’ which means you are not expanding as a person.